东邻西舍

我不知道 但是我在给她"我对不起"的能量 所以
I don't know, but I'm giving "I apologize" energy, so...
只要不摸她屁♥股♥ 什么事都没有
Well, I mean, she was fine until I touched her bottom.
可能是尿裤疹
It could be diaper rash.
确实是有可能
It sure could be.
你为什么会递给我一个有皮疹的宝宝呢
Well, why would you hand me a rashy-ass baby?
加尔文 宝宝需要药膏
She needs ointment. Calvin!
好 好 我去
买♥♥Yeah. Yeah, I'm going.
我又要去了
I'm going. I'm going, I'm going.
我现在最好在商店找份工作
I might as well get a job at the store at this point.
戴夫 来吧
Dave! Let's go!
真菌药膏过道需要协助
Associate needed in the fungal ointment aisle.
现在是真菌了
Yeah, that's right, it's fungus this time.
我现在更加像个蘑菇
I'm more mushroom than I am man at this point.
这个人现在估计是个香菇了 -欸
Now, this man is basically shiitake! -Hey.
戴夫 冷静点
Dave, calm down, okay?
你没事吧
Are you all right?
一点也不好
No, I'm not all right.
格洛弗不记得任何过去提升亲子关系的事了
Grover doesn't remember any of the things that we bonded over.
你听过赛琳娜冰上探险吗
Have you ever seen Safari Selina on Ice?
♪ When you're looking at something far away ♪
♪ There's only one thing that you've got to say ♪
♪ Telescope, telescope, telescope, hooray! ♪
你知道这首歌♥有多长吗
You know how long that song was?
八分钟! 你猜这首歌♥还有其它歌♥词吗
Eight minutes. You know many other verses there were?
根本没有!
None!
所以 你想说什么
Okay, so what is your point?
我遭过罪
My point is, I've suffered.
然后呢
And for what?
他什么都不记得了!
He doesn't even remember any of it.
好吧 我的孩子都还记得
Well, unfortunately, my boys do remember.
马尔科姆还记得
Malcolm remembers me
当他7岁时 我违反了禁止童工法律
breaking child labor laws when he was seven.
加尔文 你完全没必要
Calvin, you don't need to make up horrible stories
编故事来安慰我
just to make me feel better.
听好 我一直都是工作狂
Look, I've always been a workaholic.
我就是 不想让马蒂像我一样
I-I just don't want Marty to be like me.
我知道 你可能不想听我说
Okay, look, well, you probably don't want to hear this,
但肌肤相亲 什么时候都来得及
but it's never too late for... skin-to-skin.
你说没说肌肤相亲
Don't you say it. Don't you say skin-to-skin.
你到底说没说肌肤相亲?
Don't you say skin-to-skin!
再要去药房♥的时候
All right, Calvin, give me a buzz when it's time
记得给我打电♥话♥
to go back to the drugstore.
别脱鞋
Don't take your shoes off.
♪ If you're looking at something far away ♪
♪ There's only one thing you've got to say ♪
♪ Telescope, telescope, telescope... ♪
♪ Hooray. ♪
你 都还记得
You remember.
记得什么
R-Remember what?
这首歌♥啊 你还记得这首歌♥
Th-The song. You remember the song.
哦 这个
Oh, th--
我不知道这是什么
I don't know where that came from.
太烂了
It's terrible.
那确实啊
I know, isn't it?!
我买♥♥好了皮疹膏
Hey, I got the rash cream.
嘘 不要吵
Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
她在握我的手
She's holding my finger.
哦
Oh.
接下来 我要说一说
You know, that's what I was gonna say
陪产假这件事
about the paternity leave thing.
又来了
Oh, here we go.
不不不
No. No, no, no, no.
我想让你放假
I want you to take it.
你想花多少时间 就请多少时间
I mean, take all the time that you need.
怎么突然改主意了
Wow. Where'd this come from?
我在做改变
I'm evolving.
我的意思是 宝宝在握你的小拇指
I mean, that little baby squishing your pinky right now,
她是第一要务
she's your most important priority,
比其他事情都重要
beyond anything else.
Fusebox的工作就不要操心了
Don't worry about the Fusebox, all right?
应该是"兆瓦"
斯特凡可以解决巨齿鲨
Stephan can handle the megalodons.
马蒂
Marty!
我的天 -抱歉
Good God! -Sorry.
马蒂 我给你带了礼物
Marty, I got a present for you.
加尔文 眼睛往上看
Calvin, eyes up here.
别哭 别哭
Don't-don't-don't cry.
不要哭 没事的
Don't cry. It's okay.
哎呀
Oh. Oh.
马蒂!
Um, uh, Marty!
买♥♥点消毒洗手液
G-Get me some hand sanitizer!
马蒂!
Marty!
加尔文?
Calvin?!
哦
Oh.
听到达芙妮哭就让我心疼
It just breaks my heart to hear my Daphne cry.
宝宝 嘘 嘘 好吗
Okay, shh, shh, shh. Okay.
来 来
Okay. Okay.
无论你喜不喜欢我 我都要抱一抱你
Whether you like me or not, I'm gonna pick you up.
我知道
Okay. I know.
别哭 别哭
D-Don't cry, don't cry.
不要再哭了
Don't cry. Don't cry.
我能理解的 宝贝
I know, baby, I know.
我知道
I know.
我就知道
I know.
你不讨厌我
You don't hate me.
哦
Oh.
你只是讨厌消毒洗手液
You hate the hand sanitizer!
哦哦
Oh, oh.
好 达芙妮
Oh, Daphne.
你刚才怎么不说呢
But why didn't you just say that?