单亲贵族（2020）

上次贝芙做的时候 他们抽了一升半
Last time Bev did it, they got a liter and a half.
太疯狂了 她已经挺瘦了
That's crazy. She's thin already.
- 我们能不能... - 贝芙瘦是因为她抽脂
- Hey, can we just... - Bev's thin because she gets lipo.
我们不能告诉汤姆
Oh, we can't tell Tom,
但她没说我不能告诉你
but she never said I had to keep it from you.
或许你可以来接我们
Maybe you could pick us up?
这样我们就不用打车回来了
Then we wouldn't have to take a cab back.
嗯 我...
Yeah, I, um...
我午饭后得去补一个牙冠
I've gotta fit a crown after lunch,
对于恢复...
but, uh, it's pretty important in terms of...
功能...
...uh, restoring the...
...挺重要的
...function.
改时间我感觉不太好 所以...
I'd feel bad if I moved it, so...
我可以晚点过去
I could come after.
你也可以现在结束
Or you could come now.
来吧
Here.
天啊 你这里也打扫了吗
Oh, my God, you cleaned up in here, too?
哇
Wow.
你真的 又帅又幽默人又好
You are, like, so good looking and funny and nice.
和你一起真的很值
You're a real catch.
或许我们做♥爱♥吧
Maybe we should have sex.
晚安
Good night.
- 什么 - 我回我屋了
- What? - I'm going to my room.
不 亲爱的 你不该把你的玩具车放进马桶里的
No, darling, you shouldn't have put all your trucks in the toilet.
让爸爸接电♥话♥ 拜托 我晚饭后再和你聊
Put Daddy on again, please, and I'll speak to you after dinner.
怎么了
What's going on?
给他谈谈 汤姆
Well, talk to him, Tom.
搞清楚是谁教给他"肮脏的抗♥议♥"这种话的
Find out who's teaching him words like "Dirty protest."
好吧 晚上见
All right, I'll see you tonight.
爱你
Love you.
你怎么样了
Hey. How are you feeling?
胸口有点疼
A bit of pain in my chest.
估计是插管导致的 每次都是这个最难受
It's from the breathing tube. It's always the worst of it.
我告诉你 简去参加戒酒小组了
Oh, my God, get this. Jane is in AA.
匿名怕是没法匿了
There goes the second A.
Alcoholics Anonymous
我看到她和布莱恩
I saw her with Brian
还有那个熊孩子 她向我道歉了
and the rat child, and she apologized to me.
如果她又开始喝酒得多好笑
How funny would it be if she started drinking again?
该死
Oh, shit.
该死 我感觉我要死了了
Shit. I feel like I'm gonna die.
不好笑 婊♥子♥
That's not funny, you cunt.
糟了
Bollocks.
我没法呼吸
I can't breathe.
我的儿子们
My boys.
打电♥话♥说"妈妈呢"
Calling "Where's Mum?"
你还好吗 好吧 好的
Are you okay? Okay, all right.
- 快来人帮忙 - 呼吸
- Can we have some help in here? - Breathe.
我需要您在外面等 拜托
I need you to wait outside, please.
不 贝芙
No. Bev?
呼吸
Breathe!
- 我需要您在外面等 - 我不是那个意思
- I need you to wait outside. - I didn't mean it.
贝芙
Bev?
怎么了
Hey, what's going on?
我叫她婊♥子♥了
I called her a cunt.
栓塞是什么
What's an embolism?
做脂肪转移手术时 将脂肪放回去
Well, when you're having a routine fat transfer, sometimes they put it back
放得太深 造成栓塞 然后流到了肺部
too deep and it forms a clot that travels to the lungs.
这就是为什么 你长大后
That's why, when you're older, it's so important
要找最好的整形医生
that you only choose the best plastic surgeon.
为什么贝芙阿姨没有最好的医生
Why didn't Auntie Bev have the best doctor?
她有 但是她用了过多的苯♥丙♥胺♥
She did, but he was abusing amphetamines.
你要穿成女巫多少天
How many days are you going to be dressing like a witch for?
我还在哀悼期间就这样
For as long as I'm in mourning.
但是 妈妈...
But, Mummy...
贝芙还活着
Bev's still alive.
是啊 贝芙活下来了 很幸运
Yeah, Bev pulled through, luckily,
但我的大脑直接进入哀悼模式
but my mind went straight to the grief
然后就直接穿成了这样
and then immediately to the outfit.
如果你死了谁来照顾我
Who would look after me if you died?
我猜你♥爸♥爸得尽全力了
Well, I guess your dad would have to give it his best shot.
那... 爸爸会照顾我们的婴儿吗
And... And would Daddy look after our baby, too?
不 除非他是婴儿的爸爸
No, not unless he was the baby's dad.
我觉得那你得尽全力活着
I think you'd better try extra hard to stay alive.
或许别乱动你的脂肪
Maybe leave all your fat where it is.
这不太现实是不是 亲爱的
Aww, that's not realistic, is it, honey?
你好 席琳迪翁 谁死了
Bonjour, Celine Dion. Who died?
爸爸
Daddy!
贝芙阿姨差点死了 爸爸
Aunt Bev almost died, Daddy.
谢谢你说我像席琳迪翁
Thanks for saying I'm like Celine Dion.
苯♥丙♥胺♥是什么 爸爸
What are amphetamines, Dad?
很棒的东西
They're incredible.
贝芙怎么了
What happened to Bev?
她做了个手术
She had an operation.
所以妈妈穿上了从不♥穿♥的黑衣服
So Mum got her black clothes out of the cellar,
因为她很伤心
because she's sad.
我得走了
I've got to go.
谢谢
Thank you.
- 贝芙没死 - 她死了一分钟
- Bev didn't die. - She died for a minute.
难以想象你这么需要博关注的人
Imagine needing attention that bad.
我他妈的很伤心
I am fucking sad.
- 如果我死了... - 没人死
- If I die... - Nobody died.
如果我死了的话...
If I died...
如果我在你之前死了 虽然很不公平
before you, I mean, which would be so unfair,
你可是个起码得了两次梅毒的瘾君子...
considering you're a junkie who's had syphilis at least twice...
是战胜了梅毒两次 继续说
Beat syphilis twice. Go on.
我想让我的孩子们在一起
I would want my children to stay together.
你觉得我会留一个喜欢的然后卖♥♥一个吗
You think I'm gonna keep my favorite and sell the other one?
理想状态的话 你会在出海中意外肢解身亡
Ideally, you'll be dismembered in a boating accident
然后孩子们和我就能好好生活下去了
and the children and I will be free to get on with our lives.
不管怎样 成交了
In any case, you've got a deal.
为了保证孩子们的未来
To secure my children's future together,
我同意... 财产的要求
I will agree to the terms of the... ...legacy agreement.
名字呢
The name?
一万呢
The ten grand?
那...
The...
自然受孕呢
natural conception?
- 前提是你下面还能用 - 当然
- Assuming your dick still works. - Oh, my dick works.
那起码你还有点用处
That's one of you with a job then.
去你的 混♥蛋♥ 我真希望自己信了医生
Fuck you, motherfucker. I wish I trusted doctors.
这是我人生最大的牺牲
This is gonna be the greatest sacrifice of my life.
是吗 恭喜你初尝为人父母的滋味 混账
You think? Welcome to parenthood, shit-hawk!