单亲贵族（2020）

Oh, shit.
停学
Suspended!
抱歉老妈
Sorry!
当我说这比较私密的时候
When I'm sad, that's private.
你不能跟收养机构说
You can't tell adoption agents.
我冷嘲热讽其他孩子的时候
And when I make cruel jokes about the other children,
你也不能告诉任何人啊
you can't tell anybody.
我本来很信任你的
I trusted you.
等等 米莉重复了我的笑话 我倒有麻烦了
Hang on. Millie repeated my jokes and I'm in trouble.
但我只是重复了你的笑话
But I repeated your jokes,
所以不应该是你有麻烦了吗
so shouldn't you be the one in trouble?
不是 因为我只在家说啊
No, because I said those at home,
只是私底下讲 保密工作做得一级棒
in confidence, and I nailed the delivery.
一开始我只是为了逗她笑
I only tried to make her laugh to start with
因为你说了
because you said things
如果米莉喜欢我的话 在学校会好混一点
would be easier in school if Millie liked me.
在其他家长和校长面前
Humiliating me in front of the
让我丢脸可不会变得更好
other parents and your headmaster is not easier.
我以后还怎么在他们面前拽啊
How am I supposed to be smug around them now?
你什么时候这么在意别人的想法了
Since when do you care what those people think anyway?
对他们来说 你一直都很粗鲁 还惹人讨厌
You're rude and nasty to them all the time.
你怎么能这么说我 我可是你好闺蜜
How could you say that about me? I'm your best friend.
米莉才是我好闺蜜
Millie is my best friend.
你是醉迷糊了吧 米莉逊毙了
Are you drunk? Millie sucks.
- 她很有趣 - 我才有趣
- She's fun. - I am fun!
整整一周我都在照顾你
I've been trying to look after you all week,
想尽办法让你大笑
trying to make you laugh,
让你开心
trying to make you smile,
而你只会为蠢男人哭哭啼啼的
and all you can do is cry about a stupid man.
我现在面临着被孤立的个人危机
I am having an isolated personal crisis, yes,
而你不合时宜地做些错事
and you've picked a really inconvenient time to start misbehaving.
这不关你的事 不是所有事都要围着你转
This isn't about you. Not everything is about you.
什么事都和我无关
Nothing is about me!
- 为了你 我不断牺牲 - 是 老妈
- I've made constant sacrifices for you... - Yes, Mum!
因为父母都是这么做的 他们总是做出牺牲
'Cause that's what parents do. They make sacrifices.
你不会因此得个奖章
You don't get a medal for it.
所有家长都这么做吗
Is that what all parents do?
那好 既然你有妈也有爸
Well, since you have two parents,
咱们就等你♥爸♥听到这话 看他什么反应
wait till your father hears about this.
拜托 没必要扯上我爸
Please, there's no need to involve my dad.
你是个坚强 独♥立♥的女人
You're a strong, independent woman,
不需要男人做你后盾
who doesn't need a man to back you up.
你知道 女性用女权来
Do you know what it's called when women use feminism
互相操纵 互相压♥迫♥的时候 叫什么吗
to manipulate and oppress each other?
白人女权
White feminism?
好吧 你弄混了 这样说不对
Well, yeah, and it's messed up and it won't work.
我们去船那儿
We're going to the boat.
什么鬼
What fresh hell?
我闺女来了
Hey, that's my kid!
宝贝 上船来
Come aboard, baby!
我想让你见见这位女士
I want you to meet my lady.
真实天赐尤物 我亲爱的宝贝
What a gift! Oh, my darlings!
我一直都很想见你
I've been dying to meet you!
小公主 我们有些好消息告诉你
We've got some great news, princess.
你要有一位新继母啦
You are gonna have a new stepmum!
- 继母 - 你叫什么
- Stepmum? - What is your name?
你太逗了 奥丽芙 就像你♥爸♥说的那样
You are hilarious, Olive, just like your daddy said.
这位是谢丽尔
This is Cheryl.
她裤子呢
Where are her trousers?
我不知道在哪儿 需要来一杯吗
I don't know where they are. Can I get you a drink?
不用了 我没时间看你们这般闹腾 无意冒犯
No, sorry, I don't have time for whatever this is. No offense.
谢普 我们谈谈奥丽芙
Shep, we need to have a conversation about Olive.
当然 奥丽芙可是我的心头肉
Of course, Olive's still my number one girl.
小谢谢 你真是位好父亲
You are such a beautiful father, Sheppy.
奥丽芙今天被停学了
Olive was suspended from school today.
没人管了 太棒了
Anarchy! Love it.
不不不 谢普
No! Shep, no.
让奥丽芙陷入麻烦的人都是错的
Anyone who gets Olive in trouble is wrong.
这就是我的想法
That's what I thought,
后来我和她校长见了一面
and then I had a meeting with her headmaster.
你知道这是什么吗 我们今天注定要见面
Do you know what this is? We were destined to meet today.
宝贝 一切都是命运使然
That is cosmic, babe.
什么 这件事你得和我站一边
Uh, excuse me? I really need you to be united with me on this.
你不会觉得这能让人接受吧...
You can't possibly think it's acceptable...
我觉得在你对自己可悲的生活状态
I think it's unfair of you to blame Olive
感到非常沮丧的时候
when what you're really upset
去责怪奥丽芙 太不公平了
about is the pathetic state of your personal life.
多谢
Thank you.
我的生活崩溃了还不是因为你
The breakdown of my personal life is because of you.
你得放下我了
You've gotta let me go.
如你所见 我的生活已经继续了 你也会的
I've moved on, as you can see, and soon you will too.
如果你想聊聊的话 我可以帮你
I'm here for you, babe, if you ever wanna talk.
如果你被挟持了 我可以帮你
And I'm here for you if this is a hostage situation.
- 要是你陷入麻烦了就眨眨眼 - 不不不
- Just blink if you're in trouble. - No, no!
我一直都是真我乐队的粉丝
No, I'm a longtime Tru-Séer.
我可是超级粉丝
I'm a massive fan.
你想象一下 我因为要准备派对缺几块排骨
So imagine my surprise when I pop out to my local butcher's,
于是去了一趟肉铺
as I'm short a few lamb chops for a dinner party...
谢丽宝宝爱吃肉
CherBear eats meat.
你猜我看见谁为了几块碎肉做俯卧撑
And who should I spot in the queue for some offcuts doing press-ups?
- 是谢普·奈特啊 - 谢普·奈特
- Shep Knight. Shep Knight. - Shep Knight. Shep Knight!
派对上我没有舞伴 所以我就...
I didn't have a date for the dinner party, so I just...
鼓起勇气 请谢普和我一起
I went out on a limb and I asked Shep to join me.
- 我们一拍即合 - 一拍
- We clicked instantly. - Instantly.
然后我们就想了 何必等着呢
And we figured, why wait? So we
所以今天早上一时兴起 我们去了卡地亚
popped out to Cartier this morning.
买♥♥了戒指
I bought my ring.
我们订婚了
We're engaged.
什么
What?
- 他们要结婚了 - 是的
- They're getting married? - Yeah!
这样是不是就不用在法庭上指证对方
Is this so you don't have to testify against each other in court?
你们俩杀人了吗
Did you two kill somebody?
是半夜游泳的时候谢普求的婚
Shep proposed on a midnight swim.
你不应该趟这浑水的
You should not get in this water.
亲爱的 不是在这儿
Not here, babe!
在我的泳池里
In my pool.
你有泳池
You have a pool?
- 嘿 是我们 有泳池 - 耶
- Girlfriend, we have a pool. - Yeah!
她很有钱啊
She's rich?
金钱是什么 不过是那些追名逐利之人
What is money but a means by which personal freedom is acquired
- 寻求自♥由♥的手段 - 不不
- by those who subscribe to the economic... - No, no.
你休想在赶走我的男朋友之后
You do not get to chase away my boyfriend,
他是个医生呢
who was a doctor by the way.
- 很好啊 - 谢谢
- Nice. - Thank you.
居然还要和一个巨♥乳♥富婆结婚
And then get to marry a loaded woman in her underwear.
又不是竞赛
It's not a competition.
但如果是 你就被淘汰了
But if it was, you've been annihilated. Wow.
你为什么要这样 他不值得快乐
Why are you doing this? He doesn't deserve joy.
去你的 为什么男人总是利用错误
Fuck! Why do men fail forwards?
这是胡说八道 这是性别歧视
This is bullshit. This is misogyny.
奥丽芙 我们走了
Olive! We're going.
好吧 我把这个吃完
Okay, let me just finish these.
爸爸 你往肋排酱里放了什么
Mmm, Dad, what did you put in this rib sauce?
秘密就是鸭崽油
The secret's young duck fat.
她看起来很饿
She seems really hungry.
我给你用锡纸包几个 宝贝
I'm gonna put some in some foil for you, babe.
你是谁啊
Who are you?
她完全不是我想象谢普会找的那种女人
She's not at all the sort of woman I pictured Shep ending up with.
首先不是充气娃娃
Not inflatable, for a start.
想让我接米莉就给我打个电♥话♥
Just give me a ring when you want Millie to be collected.
你要是一直在这儿我就没法打电♥话♥了