欲望都市（1998）

欲望城市
（性♥爱♥专家凯莉布雷萧 并且勇于发问）
“十万火急”
纽约客的每一天
In the life of a New Yorker,
必须面对许多令人不快的事
there are several unpleasant things one will inevitably have to face.
比如皮包被偷
Having your purse stolen.
不小心看到别人随地大小便
Random public urination.
或是在百老汇歌♥舞剧中 看到男同性恋友人的男朋友
And seeing a gay friend's boyfriend in a Broadway review.
? And all that jazz ?
我知道最低消费额是三杯
I think I understand the three drink minimum now.
你不喜欢这出戏吗？
You're not enjoying the review?
? And all that jazz ?
坦白的说 我比较担心我的纽♥约♥时♥报♥书评
Frankly I'm more concerned about my own review in The Times.
我的天 你的书这星期要做书评
Oh my God, right, your book's reviewed this week.
你一定很兴奋
You must be so excited.
应该说害怕才对 蜜奇可卡库塔妮
More like terrified. Michiko Kakutani.
她是纽♥约♥时♥报♥的书评
She's The Times' book critic.
我还以为那是开胃菜的名称
Oh, I thought you were suggesting an appetizer.
她既聪明又难缠
She's brilliant and she's really tough.
连名字都很难念
And impossible to pronounce.
? For all... ?
我想我们可以回家了
Uh-oh, I think they're bringin' us home.
? That... ?
你怎么会不喜欢这出戏？看我的男朋友
How could you not love this? Look at my boyfriend.
他帅呆了
He's gorgeous!
他踢腿的动作很漂亮
Oh-ho-ho-ho. And he can kick.
? That jazz ?
太棒了
-Bravo! -Bravo!
太棒了
Bravo!
他真的很棒 对不对？
Isn't he great? He's great, don't you think?
-我要上洗手间 -再来一个
-I have to go to the ladies room. -Encore!
他们要再次表演了
Now? They're gonna do an encore.
我非去不可
Uh-huh... I have to go to the ladies room.
百老汇最棒的演员是黛比凯丝
Broadway's best, Debbie Cass.
谁想得到这句广♥告♥词
Yes! Who would have thought the phrase,
“到俱乐部看黛比表妹表演”
"Go see your cousin Debbie's club act"
那么令人害怕呢？
could contain such horror?
我还以为可以遇见异性恋男人
Oh, I thought there'd be at least one straight guy here.
就算在观众席里找不到 在酒吧里应该也有吧
I mean, if not in the audience, then at least behind the bar.
等一下 因为明天
Well, hold on, 'cause tomorrow,
我们要到广场村找那些
we're gonna cruise the cute pretzel guys
卖♥♥咸味脆饼的大帅哥
-at the Village Square Market. Oh, my God.
听起来很可悲吧？
Is that as sad as that just sounded?
如果能让你感受好一些 我想说
Well, if it makes you feel any better,
我以前很喜欢制做梳子的阿曼派人
I used to have a thing for the Amish guys who make hair brushes.
没错
Yeah.
你是凯莉布雷萧
Hi. You're Carrie Bradshaw.
没错 我们认识吗？
Yeah. Have we met?
我看过你的专栏
I recognize you from your column.
你跟艾登分手后 我跟他开始交往
And I went out with Aidan right after you.
我之前还在担心“纽♥约♥时♥报♥”的书评
There I was worried about The New York Times
事实上...大家已经评判过我了
when apparently... I'd already been reviewed.
我承认那是边见面边跑
I'm tellin' you, it was a hit and run.
不 应该说见了面就跑
No, no, no, no, no. It was a face and run.
再说一次
Make it again.
那真的是不太妙
Yeah, that ain't good.
我觉得你太敏感了
I think you're being oversensitive
那就是脸部抽筋
and it was some kind of a facial spasm or something.
很多人都有过 就跟颜面神经麻痹一样
A lot of people have them, like Bell's palsy.
那不是颜面神经麻痹
No. It was not Bell's palsy.
她用她的表情表达对我的不屑
It was a full frontal attack of the face.
就像是“他真的很惨
Like uh... Wow, was he messed up.
你把他害得惨兮兮的”
You really screwed him up good.
你跟她说了什么？
What did you say to her?
我一句话都没说
I didn't have time to say anything.
她转身就走
She just ran outta the bathroom.
该死的抽筋女郎
Fuck that fucking face girl.
你什么时候会那样子
Well, when you put it like that.
抱歉 我好几天没睡
I'm sorry. I haven't slept for days.
布莱迪一直哭个不停
Brady's been crying nonstop.
好可怜 我帮得上忙吗？
You poor thing, can I do anything?
救我离开痛苦的深渊吧
Put me out of my misery.
他怎么了 病了吗？
Well what's wrong with him, is he sick?
他没病
No, he's not sick.
也不饿 还没有长牙
He's not hungry, he's not teething,
他只是想哭
he just wants to scream.
我做了自己能做的 但还是哄不了他
I'm doing everything I can, but I can't please him.
如果他是35岁的男人 我们已经分手了
If he was 35, this is when we would break up.
他一定有什么话想说
He has issues, clearly.
我给你们说 这个十三磅重的烤肉饼
I'm telling you. This 13 pound meatloaf
快把我逼疯了 我觉得好恶心
is pushing me over the edge. I feel disgusting!
我的衣服闻起来跟呕吐物差不多
All of my clothes smell like barf.
我没时间洗澡 更别提剪头发了
I don't have time to have a shower much less get a haircut.
那倒是提醒了我 我该确认
Oh, that reminds me. I have to confirm my appointment
约翰曼帝发廊的预约时间
with John Mandee at the John Mandee Salon.
你们不知道要跟他们个时间有多难
You have no idea how hard it was to get this appointment.
我是莎曼珊琼斯
Hi, it's Samantha Jones.
我想确认星期六的预约时间
I'm calling to confirm my appointment Saturday.
我要请约翰帮我剪发跟染发
For a cut and color with John.
谢谢 危机解除
Thanks. Crisis averted.
梅格在等我
Well... Magda's waiting for me.
我该回监狱去了
Time to go back to prison.
我跟你一起走 我可以帮你
Let me come with you, I can help.
你不必那么做
You don't have to do that.
没事的 我有一些问题
No, it's okay, actually I have a few questions
星期一我要见我的离婚律师
because I'm meeting with a divorce lawyer on Monday.
问他我可不可以申请禁制令
Oh, ask him if I could get an injunction to stop a face.
你找哪位律师？
Who'd you get?
布葛律师事务所的马修布鲁明
Matthew Bloom of Bloom & Goldenblatt.
他是什么样的人？
-Mm... -What's he like?
他既聪明又难缠
He's smart. He's tough.
他难缠到可以痛扁邦妮吗？
But is he tough enough to beat Bunny to a pulp?
没问题
Uhh... Yeah.
太棒了
Good!
好了
Okay. Great.
-大家再见 祝你们有愉快的一天 -再见
-Bye, guys. Have a nice day. -Bye.
米兰达 需要帮忙的话 打电♥话♥给我
Hey, Miranda, call me if you need anything.
该死 为什么那个女孩还深深地困扰着我？
Damn, why is that girl still bothering me?
亲爱的 忘了她吧
Honey, you have to let it go.
如果我担心每个臭女人对我的评价
If I worried what every bitch in New York was saying about me,
我永远都没办法出门
I'd never leave the house.
星期一早上 夏洛特跟她的律师见面
Early Monday morning, Charlotte met with her lawyer.
他既聪明又难缠...
He was smart, tough...
而且还很帅
And gorgeous.
你在电♥话♥里说你对你的婆婆
You said on the phone you had some bad feelings
邦妮麦克道格的感觉很糟糕
about your mother-in-law, Bunny MacDougal.
我说过吗？
Did I?
跟她的律师接触过后
I get a sense from her lawyer
我觉得这会是一场硬仗
this is gonna be a bit of a battle.
这的确是一场硬仗
It was a battle alright.
夏洛特的内心在交战
The battle of the Charlottes.
想要吸引英俊律师的夏洛特
The Charlotte who wanted to seem attractive to her adorable lawyer.
跟想要痛扁邦妮麦克道格的夏洛特在交战
And the Charlotte who wanted to kick Bunny MacDougal's ass.
麦克道格太太一直在隐藏她的财产
It looks to me that Mrs. MacDougal's been very busy
以确保你什么东西都拿不到
hiding assets to make sure you don't get... well, anything.
我真的只想拿我该拿的东西
Well, I just really want what was promised.
我只要我的公♥寓♥
I want my apartment.
技术上来说 它不是你的
Well, technically, it's not your apartment.
崔的家族拥有它
Trey's family owns it.
她很小心地确保 房♥契上没有你的名字
And she was very careful to make sure your name was never on the deed.
什么？崔给了我那间公♥寓♥
What? Trey gave me that apartment!
抱歉 通常我都是很优雅的
Sorry. Usually I'm a very refined person.
因为你丈夫不在国内
Well, with your husband out of the country,
你应该更详细地说出你的需求
I'm gonna need you to be more specific.