歪小子斯科特：火力全开（2023）

感情用事啊
Emotional business
能给我一个证人吗?
Can I get a witness?
停吧!别再写歌♥了 我们能集中精神吗?
Stop! Enough with the songwriting. Can we focus for a second?
是的 我们去见见蕾蒙娜吧
Right. Let's go see Ramona.
(第一杯)
吉迪恩和朱莉? 拜托 绝对不会是吉登·格斯的
Gideon and Julie? Please! Gordon Goose would never.
你能解释一下 “吉登·格斯”是怎么回事吗?
Can you please explain this "Gordon Goose" thing?
我在安大略省北湾读高中时
Well, when I was in high school in North Bay, Ontario,
吉登 · 格斯是我那届里最奇怪的孩子
Gordon Goose was the weirdest kid in my year.
他的眼镜太大了 跟他的脸很不搭 他的衣服也很滑稽
His glasses were too big for his face. His clothes fit funny.
连他的发型也是怪怪的
Even his hair looked wrong.
大家都叫他“无畏”
Everyone called him "Fearless"
因为他每天都穿着 “无所畏惧”牌的衣服
because he wore those "No Fear" t-shirts every day.
我估计从那时候 他就开始对这名号♥过分认真了
I guess he started taking that name a little too seriously.
有一天 他向学校里最受欢迎的女孩
One day, out of nowhere, he presents the most popular girl in school
提出了12项计划 解释她为什么应该跟他约会
with a 12-point business plan as to why she should date him.
(为什么应该跟吉登约会)
他们都叫我无畏
They call me Fearless.
我不怕被拒绝的痛
I have no fear of the sting of rejection.
所以我这样做并没有什么坏处
Therefore, there's no downside to me attempting this.
当时全校人都看着呢
The whole school was watching.
事后 他就转学了
He moved away after that.
但我一直记得他
But I never forgot about him.
我并不知道吉迪恩·格雷夫斯 就是我以前认识的那个傻孩子
I had no idea Gideon Graves was the dorky kid from my past
直到他出现在我家门口
until he turned up on my doorstep.
马修·帕特尔夺走了他的一切 还剩下什么呢?
Matthew Patel took everything he had. And what was left behind?
吉登·格斯
Gordon Goose.
吉登·格斯 这就说服你了?
Gordon Goose. And that's working for you?
我们能互相理解
We understand each other.
我跟他在一起时 吉迪恩...吉登就是一个自大狂
When I was with him, Gideon... Gordon was a twitchy, rage-filled,
神经质 易怒 冲动 情感虐待 控制欲强 操纵欲强
impulsive, emotionally abusive, controlling, manipulative egomaniac.
但如果他能让你开心 那也挺好的
But if he makes you happy, that's good, I guess.
并不好 简直是糟透了
It's not good. It f****** sucks.
抱歉 你说什么?
I'm sorry, what?
吉登刚出现时 他渴望权力
When Gordon showed up, he was power-hungry.
他想报仇
He wanted revenge.
为了夺回他的帝国 他愿意不惜一切代价
He would have done anything to get his empire back.
雄心勃勃最性感了
Ambition is hot.
但过了几天 邪恶就消失了
But after a few days, it's like the evil drained out.
现在他整天坐在沙发上看动漫
Now he just sits on the couch watching anime all day.
如果这是演戏呢?
What if it's an act?
我认识的吉迪恩是一个阴谋家
The Gideon I knew was a plotter.
邪恶前任联盟的事可能只是烟雾弹
The whole League of Evil Exes thing could have been a smokescreen
掩盖绝密的绑♥架♥阴谋
for an ultra-secret kidnapping plot.
或许其他前任并没有参与其中
Maybe none of the other exes were in on it.
或许是吉哥一个人干的
Maybe it was all G-Man.
或许你俩是一伙的
Or maybe the two of you were in on it together.
听着 我也希望事情是这样的
Look, I wish that was the case.
我也希望 我们能做一些刺♥激♥的反派勾当
I wish we were up to some exciting villain business.
那样会给家里增添一些情趣
It would spice things up around the house.
但他只是一个废柴 相信我吧
But he's just a loser, trust me.
你可以把他或者把我们 从你的名单上划掉了
You can take him, or us, off your list.
往前一步 后退两步
One step forward, two steps back.
你应该去家里跟他打声招呼
You should come over and say hey.
我想吉登想为创建联盟什么的事道歉
I think Gordon wants to apologize for creating the league and all that.
我一定要去吗?
Do I have to?
他的真名叫吉登·格斯 就住在这附近
Hey. So his real name is Gordon Goose, and he's living here in the neighborhood,
他在跟一个在咖啡店工作的女孩约会
and he's dating some girl who works in a coffee shop.
你能相信这些八卦吗?
Can you believe that crap?
我喜欢这些八卦 这些八卦让我着迷
I love that crap. I'm obsessed with that crap.
斯黛茜!你在偷听吗?
Stacey! Were you eavesdropping?
你今天休息 不该来店里的 快点走吧
You shouldn't be here on your day off. Scoot. Scoot on out of here.
我的屋顶上有一个洞吗?
Is that a hole in my roof?
我才离开90分钟而已!
I was gone for 90 f****** minutes!
你们对我家做什么了?
What did you do to my house?
那边的机器人是怎么回事?
And what's with the robot?
什么机器人?
What robot?
我在哪里见过那个机器人?
Where have I seen that robot?
我想要答案!
I want some answers!
不怪我 是格斯搞的
It wasn't me. It was the Goose.
什么?格斯不会滑板
What? Goose don't skate.
我为什么要在 朱莉可爱的家里造一个滑板坡道呢?
Why would I build a skate ramp in the middle of Julie's lovely home?
她好像很生气 我是不是不能住在这里了?
She seems pissed. Does this mean I can't live here?
住在这里?什么?
Live here? What?
我不管是你们谁干的! 你们俩都要付出代价!
I don't care which one of you did it! You're both gonna pay!
咕噜 不是吧
Gulp. - Oh no.
朱莉·波沙斯对 卢卡斯·李和吉登·格斯
Julie Powers versus Lucas Lee and Gordon Goose.
开战
Fight.
住手!这样太蠢了
Stop! This is stupid.
我们这次成熟一点把
Let's all be adults for once, okay?
朱莉 你在干什么?
Julie, what are you doing?
我不知道 我想我是一时冲动
I don't know. I guess I got caught up in the moment.
卢卡斯 你不能住在这里 太荒谬了
Lucas, you can't live here. That's ridiculous.
你自己找地方住去吧
Find your own place.
我没钱了
I'm flat broke.
我连回洛杉矶的头等舱机票都买♥♥不起
I can't even afford a first-class flight back to L.A.
我唯一能找到的工作 就是为一部动画片配音
And the only work I can get is voicing an animated series.
卢卡斯·李只接真人出演
Lucas Lee is live action or nothing.
你可能需要敞开心扉接受其他的机会
You might need to open your mind to other opportunities.
还有你!
And you!
别再颓下去了
Stop being a loser.
对朱莉好一点 别像当初对我那样
And treat Julie better than you treated me.
嘿 那个头上顶着灯罩的机器人
Hey, that robot with the lampshade on its head.
我在哪里见过它?
Where have I seen it before?
在电影拍摄期间 他在我的拖车里监视我
During the movie shoot. He was spying on me in my trailer.
不在那里 是其他地方...
Not there. Somewhere else.
你知道那是谁造的 对吧? 那是他们的小宝贝
You know who made him, right? That's their special little guy right there.
那对双胞胎
The Twins.
我得走了
I gotta go.
看来她有更重要的事要做 好吧 今天挺开心的
Guess she's got better things to do. Well, it's been real.
是啊 有空来咖啡店吧
Yeah, come by the coffee shop sometime.
有免费咖啡?
Free coffee?
不是吧!
No f****** way!
但如果你想找工作 我们在招人
But if you ever want a job, we're hiring.
随便吧 吉登
Whatever. Gordon...
我的哥们
My man.
朱莉 你觉得我很失败吗?
Jules, do you think I'm a loser?
我不知道 吉登 有时候是吧
I don't know, Gordon. Sometimes, I guess.
好吧 如果我说 虽然我看起来什么都没做
Well, what if I said that while it seemed like I wasn't doing anything
像是在卖♥♥惨
and was throwing a pity party...
但我其实是在谋划一件大事
I was actually planning an elaborate plan.
一项报复夺走我一切的人的计划
A plan in which I would get revenge on the one who took everything from me.
一项把马修·帕特尔化为灰烬的计划
A plan that would turn Matthew Patel into dust.
如果我在那样计划 你会怎么说?
What would you say if I was planning a plan like that?
我会怎么说?
What would I say?
我会说: “太性感了”
I'd say, "That's hot."
快去给我打扫房♥间 吉登!
Now clean my f****** house, Gordon!
马上!
Right away!
你们在这里做什么?
What are you all doing here?
我们有关于你的案子的信息 你调查斯科特的案子
We have information about your case, your Scott case.
我们都没有你的电♥话♥号♥码
None of us had your phone number.
如果我告诉你们 我已经破案了呢?
What if I told you I cracked the case wide open?
你们有人想听听我的发现吗?
Would any of you want to hear what I figured out?
这是我最喜欢的“谁干的”部分
This is my favorite part of every "whodidit."
揭晓谁是凶手的时刻
The part when you find out who did it.
是“谁没干”
It's "whodunnit."
那也应该是“之前谁干的” 我最懂了 我以前是写剧本的
If anything, it'd be "Who's done it?" I would know. I used to be a writer.
好吧 正如你们所知
Okay.
斯科特是被伪造他的死亡的人
As you all know, Scott was taken from the scene of The Rockit
从摇滚餐厅现场带走的
by someone who faked his death.
我一直想弄清楚是谁干的 为什么要那么干 是怎么干的
I've been trying to figure out who did it, why they did it, and how they did it.