过家家（2014）

No, Doris!
盖里 我主动找了找
Gary, um, I took the initiative
关于康涅狄格州离婚法的资料
of doing a little research into Connecticut divorce law,
然后我想做的是我们从财产方面着手
and what I would love to do is to start with the financials.
- 噢 不用 你知道啥不 - 嗯
- Oh, no. You know what? - Mm-hmm.
- 我们已经全部都做好了 - 噢 那好吧
- We took care of all that. - Oh, okay.
其实 我在私募股本方面上是有些建树的
Well, I've done a little work in, uh, private equity, so...
噢 好吧 在康涅狄格州这里吗
Oh. Okay. Here in Connecticut?
呃 不 是在中国 莲峰集资
Uh, no, in China actually, for Lotus Capital.
那是亚洲最大的公♥司♥之一
It's, um, one of the largest companies in all of Asia.
哇哦 好屌♥ 关于中国的私募股本我是一窍不通
Wow, yeah, I don't know anything about Chinese private equity at all.
但我一直投身于康涅狄格州的
But I have been practicing divorce law
离婚法已经有七年了 所以
here in Connecticut for seven years now, so...
噢 你说你上的是哪所大学的法学院来着
Oh. What law school was it that you said you went to?
只不过是个本地的学校
Just a local school.
是啊 我不知道你有没有听说过
Yeah, I don't know if you would've heard of it.
- 是叫耶鲁 没记错的话 - 噢 这样 好吧
- It's called Yale? - Oh, I see. Okay.
我的学位证书就在这儿 我还把它裱了起来
Yeah, I have my diploma here. I framed it and everything.
- 你想看的话我不介意 - 我相信你
- I'm happy to show you the... - I'll take your word for it.
你确定吗 我现在就能给你看
Are you sure? 'Cause I can get it.
- 盖里曾经是韦芬洛普的一员 - 你说什么
- Gary was a whiffenpoof. - I'm sorry?
对
Yes.
那是美国历史最悠久的大学无伴奏合唱团
It's the oldest collegiate acappella group in the United States.
是的 不过更重要的是
Yes, but more importantly,
我曾经是中世纪牧歌♥学会的负责人
I was a lord in the medieval madrigal society.
- 嗯 - 哇哦
- Mm. - Wow.
有点屌♥啊
Kind of a big deal.
过了很长时间了 但是 呃
It's been a long time, but, uh...
- # 哼 哼 哼 # - 什么情况
- Hum, hum, hum - What's going on?
- 他中风了吗 - # 哼 哼 #
- Is he having a stroke? - Hum, hum
# 据我所知 野猪头 #
The boar's head, as I understand
# 是世间最稀有的食物 #
Is the rarest dish in all the land
- # 哼 哼 # - 现在是什么情况
- Hum, hum - What's happening right now?
# 我呈上的野猪头 #
The boar's head I present in hand
# 配上了缤纷的花环 #
And thus bedecked with a gay garland
这太好了 明天你们要这样仲裁吗
This is great. Are you guys gonna do this tomorrow?
是啊 如果必须这样的话
Yeah, if we have to.
# 据我所知 野猪头 #
The boar's head, as I understand
# 据我所知 野猪头 #
The boar's head, as I understand
# 是世间最稀有的食物 #
Is the rarest dis in all the land
我不得不说 我真没想到能被一个小镇上
I gotta say, I was not expecting to be impressed
的律师惊艳到 但是盖里确实是学问颇深啊
by your small-town lawyer, but Gary knows his stuff.
我知道 我很高兴可以
I know. I'm so happy to have...
我感到很幸运 很有安全感
I feel very lucky, very taken care of, you know?
是啊 嘴上不哼哼歌♥我也能做到
Yeah. I could do without the mouth music, though.
那种歌♥
Songs about...
特别是那些诡异的中世纪唱腔
Especially those creepy medieval tones.
- 嘿 我知道这很怪 但是 - 嗯哼
- Hey, I know this is weird, but... - Mm-hmm.
我不知道 我刚在想说不定盖里跟我能
I don't know, I was kind of thinking that Gary and I might just...
出去喝杯咖啡读一读电子书
Go out for a cup of coffee and an hour with your kindle fire,
没想到就要与自己惨痛的过往打照面
and you're forced to confront your past in an unpleasant way.
妈 是你跑到我们这桌的
Mom, you came over to our table.
嗯 我马上就要走
Well, I can't stay.
我要去上泰拳课
I am taking a Muay Thai boxing class,
而且我已经迟到很久了
and I'm already muy minutes late.
我很确定那是两种完全不同的语言
I'm pretty sure those are two completely different languages
你这是在乱用 不过无所谓
you're butchering, but okay.
咋了
What?
喔 我的天 妈 你要挂了吗
Oh, my God, mom. Are you dying?
妈 你得癌症了吗
Mom, do you have cancer?
不 我没得癌症
No, I don't have cancer.
我带了糖浆
I have syrup.
小木屋产的
From the cabin.
打小你就喜欢喝 来给你
You loved it when you were a kid, so here it is.
我家里有一大堆
I have a crate of it at home,
我有点骨质疏松
but I have a touch of osteoporosis,
所以我提不起来
so I can't lift it.
想要的话就过来拿一些
So come and get some if you want.
不要就算了
Or don't. Whatever.
我知道你随心而为
I'm sure you'll do what you want.
- 刚刚好怪 - 额 这不是很温馨吗
- That was weird. - Well, I thought it was sweet.
- 给我一瓶糖浆吗 - 这是肯瓦湖产的
- Giving me purse syrup? - It's from Lake Kimmewah.
你不是常说那是唯一你跟你妈
Don't you always says that the only place
处得来的地方吗
you and your mom ever got along?
呃 好吧 那个是 因为当你在皮船上
Um, okay, well, yeah, 'cause it was hard to fight
喝着鸡尾酒的时候 是很难吵起来的
when you're drinking cocktails in a kayak.
好吧 或许她只是想弥补你们之间的关系
Okay, maybe she was just trying to reach out.
她想把我弄肥
She's trying to make me fat.
她很妒忌我的美脖
She's jealous of my neck.
- 噢 - 啥
- Oh. - What?
你猜怎么着
Oh, guess what.
你的律师加我好友了
Your lawyer friended me.
噢 天呐 你看他的头像多可爱
Oh, my God. Isn't his profile pic cute?
他救助了很多斗牛犬
He rescues pit bulls.
他给我留言了
He left me a message.
“我想方设法地把我的律师证翻出来了”
"I managed to rustle up my law degree."
- 这可是一朵奇男子啊 - 嗯 他确实是
- This guy's a piece of work. - Yeah, he is.
很想请你喝一杯 给你看一下
Would love to show it to you over drinks.
噢 天 不好意思 果汁撒得到处都是
Oh, God! I'm sorry. Juice! Juice everywhere.
我把我的果汁给撒了
I just spilled my... I spilled my juice.
好吧 放轻松
All right, easy, steel magnolias.
- 果汁 果汁 - 我们可以搞定
- Juice, juice, juice. - We got it.
- 他约你出去 - 是啊 我知道
- He asked you out. - Yeah, I know.
我会说拒绝的 因为很怪 对吧
I'll say no, though, 'cause that's weird, right?
不 你想要去吗
No. I mean, do you wanna go?
我是说
I mean,
他是这个镇上我遇到的唯一
he's the only guy in town that I've met
没有穿着廉价法兰绒衣服的人
that's not wearing a flannel from Ross Dress For Less.
但是 他是你的律师啊
But, I mean, he's your lawyer, so...
不 你必须去
No, you have to go!
好了 别 别冲我嚷嚷
Okay, stop... Stop yelling at me.
对不起
Sorry.
你确定你不介意吗
Are you sure you're okay with it?
当然了 完全不介意
Of course, I'm totally cool!
完全酷酷哒
Totes kewl!
好吧 那好 酷酷哒
Okay. All right, well, kewl.
我会去的 酷
I'll do it. Kewl.
- 好的 - 酷 完全酷酷哒
- Okay. - Kewl. Totes kewl.
我还没忘
Still got it.
艾玛 你得再到你妈妈那里拿些自♥制♥的糖浆过来
Emma! You gotta go get some more of this homemade syrup from your mom.
好美味
It is divine!
你是在用酒杯喝糖浆吗
Are you drinking syrup from a shot glass?
我 我就当是在喝龙舌兰了
I am, I'm doing a little tasting Tequila-style.
- 好吧 这可不行 - 别这样
- Okay, that cannot be good. - Come on.
我怀孕了 糖分就是我的酒精
I'm pregnant. Sugar is my alcohol.
好吧 听着 我能问你个问题吗
Okay, listen, can I ask you a question?
这双长筒靴看起来怎么样
Do these riding boots look okay?
这会不会太刻意
Does it look like I'm trying too hard?
会不会太过头 像是布莱克·莱福利去马棚的感觉
Is it too, like, Blake Lively hitting the stables?
不 你看起来很棒 你试穿靴子干嘛
No, you look gorgeous. Why are you trying on boots?
噢 盖里给我打电♥话♥
Oh, Gary called.
他想临时改变一下今晚的计划
He wanted to do, like, a last-minute thing tonight.
- 所以我就想 好吧 - 今晚吗
- So I was like, okay. - Tonight?
你今晚就要去做吗
You're doing that tonight?
是啊 我想是露台那边有支蓝草乐队
Yeah, I guess there's a bluegrass band down at the gazebo?
那是苹果饺子帮啊
That's the Apple Dumpling Gang,
他们名声在外啊
and they're phenomenal.
噢 噢 那就是他了
Oh. Oh, that's actually him.
等等 不好意思 他到这里来接你吗
Wait, I'm sorry. He's picking you up here?
- 是呀 - 我在的地方吗
- Yeah! - Where I am?
是啊 我想他有点守旧吧