腌黄瓜先生

我是史密尔顿先生 你们是这一块
I am Mr. Smilton. You are the most relentless
最无情的赏金猎人 这里禁止吸烟
bounty hunters in the region. There's no smokin' in here!
几个月来 一只狗一直偷偷溜进我的马厩
For months, a dog has been sneakin' into my stables
跟我珍贵的赛马通奸
and fornicatin' with my prized racehorses.
我只知道他喜欢腌黄瓜
All I know about him is he loves pickles.
把他的狗头带来
Bring me his head.
杀了他
Kill him!
腌黄瓜先生
Mr. Pickles!
欢迎来到老镇
腌黄瓜先生
Mr. Pickles!
你在这呢 好孩子
There you are! Good boy!
腌黄瓜先生
第一季 第九集
我们不应该带腌黄瓜先生一起来
We shouldn't be bringing Mr. Pickles.
上次我们去烧烤
Last time we went to a barbecue,
他杀死了一堆人
he killed a bunch of people and...
爸爸 别再说"邪恶腌黄瓜先生"的故事了
Dad, not another "evil Mr. Pickles" story.
腌黄瓜先生 去弗洛伊德家烧烤高兴吗
Are you excited to go to Floyd's barbecue, Mr. Pickles?
弗洛伊德有点古怪
Now, Floyd's a bit of an oddball,
所以他家可能会有点
so his house might be a little...
应该就是那栋
Oh, this must be it.
弗洛伊德 你的房♥子不错
Floyd. Nice house you have.
这只是个废弃的房♥子
Oh, that's just an abandoned house.
弗洛伊德的烧烤会
我住在那
Uh, I live over here.
-天哪 -这是我的妻子
- Oh, my. - And this is my wife.
亲爱的
Oh, you.
来点黄油煎蛋黄酱牡蛎吗
Butter-dipped fried mayo oysters?
你一定要把食谱告诉我
I'll have to get your recipe.
当然可以 跟我来
Sure thing. Come with me.
够了 够了
That's enough for now.
爸爸 腌黄瓜先生呢
Dad, where's Mr. Pickles?
他会出现的 汤米
Uh, he'll turn up, Tommy.
那是鲸鱼吗
Is that a whale?
不是 那是虾塞在螃蟹里
No, it's a shrimp stuffed in a crab
再塞进比目鱼 再塞进火鸡 再塞进鸭子
stuffed in a flounder in a turkey in a duck
再塞进一只鸡 再塞进水獭 再塞进海牛里
in a chicken in an otter in a manatee
再塞进熊里 再塞进大象 再塞进鲸鱼
in a bear in an elephant in a whale.
这是个超级豪华版的烤肉套娃
It's a "shrabounturduckenottemanabearap hantale."
别动 否则我要开枪了 "砰 砰 砰"
Stop, or I'll shoot! "Shpow, shpow, shpow!"
我明明射中了你的膝盖
Hey! I shot your kneecaps!
警长 腌黄瓜先生被绑♥架♥了
Sheriff! Mr. Pickles has been dognapped!
我现在要把你的狗头带给史密尔顿先生
Now I give Mr. Smilton head.
头在被砍下后七秒钟之内还会有意识
Once decapitated, heads have life for about 7 seconds.
你看到的最后一幕将会是我埋葬你的尸体
Last thing you will see is me burying your body.
从我的头上下去
Hey! Get off my head!
去死吧
Die!
古董店
电♥话♥亭
出♥售♥
这是我的肉汁喷泉
And over here is my gravy fountain.
那是我的柠檬脆皮派吊灯
That's my chande-lemon meringue pie.
这是我的田园沙拉酱衣橱
Oh! And this is my ranch dresser.
我的袜子也放在里面
I keep my socks in there, too.
作为电♥话♥销♥售♥员 你做得比我好
Well, for two telemarketers, you do better than I do.
我的钱都是靠参加全球范围内的
Oh, I made my money winning
吃鸡翅比赛赚来的
wing-eating contests around the world.
我去做电♥话♥销♥售♥员 只是因为觉得有趣
Yeah. I'm just a telemarketer 'cause it's fun.
这种地方最适合获取信息
Places like this are great for gettin' information...
你只需要知道要问什么
just got to know what to ask.
你的妈妈最近怎么样
How's your mama?
腌黄瓜
她很好 警长
Well, she's well, sheriff.
那你♥爸♥爸呢
And your daddy?
他也很好 警长
Well, he's well, sheriff.
但是我们在找腌黄瓜先
But we're looking for Mr. Pi...
你的女朋友希娜呢
and your girlfriend, Sheena...
希娜 她也很好 警长
Oh, Sheena. Yeah, she's well, sheriff.
腌黄瓜
你没法在这个小烤架上烤这么大的鲸鱼
You can't cook that whale with this little grill.
我喜欢慢慢来 直到它变得又热又多汁
Well, I like to take my time till it's all hot and juicy.
然后把牛肉放进去
And then you put the beef inside?
你会得到一个三英尺大的牛肉馅果冻甜甜圈
And you've got a three-foot beef-filled jelly donut.
你拥有的一切都和吃的有关
Everything you have is related to food.
这是我进不了的健身房♥
Well, here's the gym I can't use anymore
因为房♥门缩小了
'cause the door's been shrinking.
弗洛伊德 不是房♥门缩小了
Floyd, the door isn't shrinking.
是你
You're...
变胖了
getting fat.
不可能
No way.
真的吗
Really?
很高兴见到你 警长妈妈
Nice to meet you, sheriff's mama.
你好 托马斯
Well, hello there, Thomas.
我答应他帮他找腌黄瓜先生
I told him we'd look for Mr. Pickles
但是我要先给你梳头发
but first I had to brush your hair. Huh?
太晚了
Too late!
为什么总是坎迪给你梳头发
But Candy always gets to brush you.
-妈妈 坎迪对我做鬼脸 -不许乱说
- Mama, Candy made a bad face. - No tattletalin'.
-但是妈妈 -不许顶嘴
- But, mama... - And no backtalkin'.
不许对我"哦" 小子
Ohh. Don't you "aw" me, boy.
你得受罚了
Now you're on punishment.
我要生火了 让开点
I want to start the fire. Now, move over!
好了 外公 我是烧烤大♥师♥
All right, Grandpa. I'm the grill master.
不 我才是烧烤大♥师♥
No, I'm the grill master.
你想干什么 腌黄瓜先生
What are you up to, Mr. Pickles?
汤米 很高兴见到你
"Hi, Tommy. Pleased to meet you."
警长 腌黄瓜先生怎么办
Sheriff, what about Mr. Pickles?!
这个嘛 汤米
Well, Tommy...
*有时候警长会觉得有点难过*
*Sometimes a sheriff can feel a little sad*
*有时候警长可能有点坏*
*sometimes a sheriff can be a little bad*
*我努力想找到腌黄瓜先生*
*I tried to to find Mr. Pickles,*
*问对了所有的问题*
*asked all the right questions*
*但妈妈让我受罚*
*But mama put me on punishment,*
*而且我该睡觉了*
*and it's time for my nap*
谢谢你引狗入洞
Thanks for luring him into my ambush.
我讨厌狗
I hate dogs. Ugh.
你想做我的女朋友吗
Hey! You want to be my girlfriend?
不 我不要
Ugh! No, I don't.
再说 我生来就没有生殖器
Besides, I was born without genitals.
那你是怎么尿尿和拉屎的
Then where do you go pee-pee and pooh-pooh?
你会不想知道的
You don't want to know.
闭嘴
Shut up!
他真可爱
He's so cute!
你可以做我的男朋友
You can be my boyfriend
前提是如果你去商店给他买♥♥更多的腌黄瓜
if you go to the store and buy more Pickles for him.
我的第一个女朋友
My first girlfriend!
白♥痴♥一个 这下有的我赚了
Idiot. More money for me!
这下我要把你的狗头砍掉
Now I'm gonna cut your stupid dog head off.
我的手指
Aah! My finger!
警长 去弗洛伊德家旁边的老房♥子
Sheriff! Get over to the old house by Floyd's.
腌黄瓜先生在这里 而且
Mr. Pickles is here and...
汤米 腌 等等 怎么了 阿比盖尔
Well, Tommy, Mr. Pi... wait. What is it, Abigail?
我的警长帽 汤米偷走了
My sheriff hat! Tommy stole it!
妈妈 发生967号♥事件
Mama, we got a code 967.
又把你的警长帽给丢了
Lost your sheriff hat again?
腌黄瓜先生在弗洛伊德家旁边的老房♥子里
Mr. Pickles is at the old house by Floyd's.
汤米肯定带着我的帽子去那儿了
Tommy must be there with my hat.
我要找狗
Me find dog.
我要一罐腌黄瓜
I need a jar of Pickles.
警长来了
The sheriff!
你妈妈还好吗
How's your mama?
你认识我妈妈吗 别告诉她你看见我了
You know my mama? Don't tell her you saw me.
我什么也没干
I wasn't doing anything.
-那你♥爸♥爸呢 -我爸爸
- And your daddy? - My daddy?!
他想让我做个好孩子 而不是罪犯