人生苦短（2011）

What time do you have to be in bed?"
你几点睡觉之类的?" 之类的
The final straw came when he looked down at me and said, "Is this legal?"
最后的高♥潮♥是 他低头看着我说 "这合法吗"
And I said, "I don't know what this is, but let's call it a night."
我说 "我不知道这是什么 不过今天就到此为止吧"
Got lovely eyes.
你的眼睛很美
Oh, thanks.
哦 谢谢
'I had a good time, had a really good time.
'我很开心 真的很开心
'She's lovely, she's great.
'她很可爱 棒极了
'Started off a bit weird. Er...
' 开始的时候有点奇怪
'But, you know, the end of the night was really lovely and he's really funny.
'但是 那晚结束的时候感觉非常好 他非常有意思
'I've been out of the game a while,
'我已经不在情场好久了
but I think after a shaky start,
不过我觉得 这个不靠谱的开头之后
'I'll weave my magic, you know.
'我一定会大展身手的
'He's really cool.'
'他真的很酷
Well, OK, not cool,
好吧 不是酷
but... um... you know, I like him.
但是... 呃... 你知道 我喜欢他
'I suppose if you've got it, you've got it.
'我估计 一旦你得到了什么 那就不会失去
It's a bit like riding a bike.'
就像骑自行车一样'
Not that Amy's a bike! Not that I can ride a bike...
不是说艾米是自行车 也不是说我会骑自行车...
I can't get anywhere near the pedals.
我连脚踏板都够不着
But now you know me, anybody I know is one degree.
但是现在你认识我了 我认识的人性格都差不多
One degree from me.
我也是
I'd like to sees him again, I'd like to hang out more.
我想再跟他见面 多约会几次
'My initial annoyance when I first saw her was
'我一看见她时最初的那种烦恼
not that I didn't fancy her, but, you know,
不是我不喜欢她 只是 你知道
I don't want people going, "Of course he's going out with a dwarf."
我不想让别人说 "他当然和一个侏儒在一起"
No, not, "of course". Yes, in this instance,
不 不应该是"当然" 的确 目前的情况下
I'm going out with a little person,
我确实是在和一个矮点的人约会
but that could just as easily have been a six-foot stunner.
不过我也完全可以跟一个六英尺高的美女在一起
You don't know. You know, what I resent is people seeing us
这可说不定 知道么 我讨厌的是人们看到我们
walking down the street, hand in hand, and going,
在街上散步 手拉手 他们会说
"Oh, look, that's all he could get."
"哦 看啊 他就只能找个这样的"
It's not all I could get,
我当然不是只能找个这样的
but it's what I'm happy with at the moment.
但是此刻拥有的让我很乐足
Phychology. Thanks for seeing me by the way.
心理学 顺便说下 谢谢你能见我
If I was to join your cult, would I get...?
如果我加入你的宗教 我会不会...?
We are not a cult.
我们不是宗教团体
We are a church. Same thing.
我们是教会 一样的
If I was to join, would I get to meet
如果我加入 会不会见到
Tom Cruise or John Travolta?
汤姆·克鲁斯或者约翰·特拉沃尔塔?
It's not something we arrange.
这不在我们掌控范围内
You've got a load of American stars right?
你们已经有一大堆的美国明星了 对吧?
You haven't got many British ones.
但是还没有多英国的
I know you were sniffing round the Beckhams,
我知道你一直在贝克汉姆夫妇周围转悠
but you don't want him as a spokesman.
但是你不会想要他成为发言人的
That squeaky little voice. And Posh Spice,
他那又尖又细的声音 辣妹呢
she's no advert for a cult.
她一点都不适合给宗教做广♥告♥
You'd have trouble brainwashing either of them,
给他们洗♥脑♥是很麻烦的
cos you need a brain to be brainwashed!
因为他们根本就没脑子可洗!
We are not a cult, and we don't brainwash people.
我们不是宗教团体 我们也不会给人洗♥脑♥
"We are not a cult and we don't brainwash people."
"我们不是宗教团体 我们也不会给人洗♥脑♥"
Do you have any more questions?
还有别的问题吗?
Yeah. This L Ron Hubbard fella,
是的 这个叫L.罗恩·哈伯德的家伙
he was the founder, wasn't he?
是创始人对吧?
That's right. What does the L stand for?
没错 L是什么意思?
Lafayette. You do definitely need the L,
拉法叶 一定得加上这个L
because just Ron Hubbard...
因为光是罗恩·哈伯德 显得有点
I mean,
我意思是
who'd follow a chap called Ron Hubbard?
谁愿意追随一个叫罗恩·哈伯德的家伙呢?
Unless he was the captain of your pub darts team, then maybe.
除非他是飞镖俱乐部的主席 那还有可能
But, yeah, stick an L in front...
但是 在前面加个L的话...
L Ron Hubbard. "Ooh, what's the L stand for?
L.罗恩·哈伯德 "哦 L什么意思来着?
"Len? Larry?" Do you have any more questions?
"莱恩? 莱瑞?" 你还有别的问题吗?
"Lionel?"
"莱昂内尔?"
'I've looked into a few different religions.'
'我正在考察一些不同的宗教'
Do you own this or is it rented?
这儿是你买♥♥下的还是租的?
I think I'm going to stay what I was born,
我想我还是生来什么样就保持什么样吧
which is sort of a vague bog standard C or E.
虽然我的生活一团乱忙 没什么档次
Cos you don't have to give anything up,
可是你不必放弃任何东西
you can drink, smoke, fornicate,
你可以喝酒 抽烟 私通
do whatever you want, and all you have to do is say,
想做什么都行 你要做的只是说上一句
"Yeah, I believe in God, "and you get into heaven.
"我相信上帝" 然后你就会进天堂
Suits me!
太适合我了!
Here we go. Off on another date with Amy tonight,
马上出发了 今晚和艾米的第二次约会
which is great. She's a lovely girl.
这很好 她是个可爱的女孩
So, yeah, I'm very excited.
所以 对 我很激动
It's funny how things work out isn't it?
事情的发展还真是有意思啊 是吧?
Cos that first date started off badly
因为第一次约会开始的时候很糟糕
but here we are, round two, so...
但是好在我们又有了第二次约会 所以...
You know, very exciting.
很兴奋
Good evening, sir. Evening. She's over there.
晚上好 先生 晚上好 她在那儿
Thanks.
谢谢
Sorry, what makes you think I'm meeting that particular lady?
对不起 你为何认为我是要去见那位女士?
Sorry, sir, I just assumed that because she's a...
对不起 先生 我只是猜的 因为她是...
A dwarf.
侏儒
A smaller lady...
一位娇小的女士...
Why would you assume I was meeting her?
你为什么认为我是来见她的?
We only have two women waiting for dining companions, sir.
我们只有两位女士在等同伴 先生
Who's the other lady that's waiting?
另一个在等的女士是谁
That woman there on the stool.
那边凳子上的那位
Oh! Tall, glamorous lady over there.
哦! 那位又高又有魅力的女士
There's no way I could be meeting her, is there?
我不可能是跟她约会 对吗?
You could be. I did just presume...
可能的 我刚才只是猜测...
What if I just walked over and started snogging her? What would happen?
如果我过去亲吻她 会怎么样呢?
She'd scream? No, not necessarily.
她会尖叫? 不 不一定
Could be lovers, you don't know.
我们可能是恋人啊 你怎么能断定
Shall we try it again?
我们能不能再来一次?
This time, don't presume you know who I'm meeting.
这次 别假装你知道我要见谁
OK.
好的
Hello, sir. Hello. I'm here to meet a woman. OK.
你好 先生 你好 我来见一位女士 好的
What is the choice of women I could be meeting? We have two waiting.
我可能会见谁呢 有两位女士在等
Point them out and I'll tell you
指出是哪两个 然后我告诉你
which one I'm meeting. There's no way you could know.
我要和谁见面 你不可能事先知道
The tall lady... Don't mention size.
那位高挑的女士 别提身高
Or there's that lady over there at the table.
还是在那边桌子旁的女士
Oh, yeah, there she is. OK. So you are meeting her?
哦 对 就是她 好的 所以你是来见她的?
Yes. But do you see my point?
是的 但是你明白我的意思了么?
There's no way you could know.
你不可能事先知道
I could have been meeting her. There's always unlikely.
我本来可能是去见她的 一般不大可能
What? Nothing. Will you just take your seat please, sir?
什么? 没什么 你能不能进去坐下呢 先生?
You don't think I could pull her,do you?
你觉得我不可能泡到她是吧?
She is very attractive. So? I'm a goodlooking bloke.
她很迷人 所以呢? 我也是个帅小伙
Mmm. What do you mean Mmm?
嗯 你嗯是什么意思?
Objectively speaking, of the people that come here,
客观地说 来这儿的人当中
would you say I'm good-looking?
你觉得我算长得不错的吗?
Sir, it's not...Would you say I'm goodlooking? No.
先生 那不是... 你觉得我帅吗? 不
Well, for a dwarf, then?
好吧 那作为一个侏儒来说呢?
Average? Oh, come on!
一般般? 哦 别这样!
Are you joking? Have you seen some dwarves?
你开玩笑吧? 你见过很多侏儒吗?
Some of them are weird-looking, they look like grubs.
他们有些长得很奇怪的 看起来像蛆似的
You're telling me, if that woman over there comes up to you
你是说 如果那边那个女人向你走来
and says, "I'm looking for a man,"
说 "我要找个男人"
you wouldn't fix me up? No.
你不问是不是我? 不会
Well, why not? I'd assume she fancied me.
好吧 为什么不呢? 我会认为她喜欢我
Why? Because if an attractive woman comes up to me and says,
为什么? 如果一个很有魅力的女人走过来说
"I'm looking for man,"
"我要找个男人"
my first words wouldn't be,
我第一句话肯定不是
"There's a horny dwarf over there who's up for it."
"有个好色的侏儒正痴心妄想呢"
I'd say, "Let me buy you a drink."
我会说 "让我请你喝一杯"
I can't believe you're worming in on my date now.
我不敢相信你竟然在破坏我的约会
I'm not. She's not your date.
我没有 她不是你约会的对象