乔治和曼迪的头婚生活（2024）

她会回来的 -你怎么知道？
She'll be back. -How do you know?
她的斯巴鲁里程数快接近30万公里了
She got a Subaru with 180,000 miles on it.
她会需要我的
She needs me.
好耶！
Yeah!
快喝 笨蛋！
Drink, sucka!
你为啥会这么擅长这个？
Why are you so good at this?
笨蛋 当我6年大学白上的么
Six years of college, sucka.
你们干啥呢？
What is going on?
曼迪在教我们她在大学学到的本领
Mandy's showing us what she learned in college.
结果就是老爸一直在输钱 因为他是？
That Dad paid for, 'cause he's a what?
大笨蛋
Sucka...
这就是你们的大计划吗？把他灌醉？
So this is your plan? Get him drunk?
老爸和我说了
Dad was actually telling me
当年他第一次被甩的经历
about the first time he got dumped.
帕梅拉·珍考斯基 恶心
Ugh. Pamela Jenkowski.
你只是嫉妒我的处♥男♥之身给了她
You're just jealous 'cause she took my flower.
恶心 -呕
Ugh. -Ew.
你喝了多少啊？
How much have you had to drink?
谁在看丝丝？
And who's watching CeeCee?
放轻松 扫兴鬼
Oh, relax, Captain Buzzkill.
我去买♥♥啤酒的时候顺便把她送到了玛丽那里
I dropped her off at Mary's on the beer run.
我才不是扫兴鬼
I'm not Captain Buzzkill.
那行 赶紧喝
Great, here you go.
里面有个乒乓球
There's a ping-pong ball in this.
抱歉
Oop, sorry.
所以有人伤过你的心吗？
So, did anyone ever break your heart?
没有 我从没被甩过
Actually, I've never been dumped.
真无聊- 真逊
Boring. -Lame.
嘿
Hey.
虽然是我提出的分手
Just because I did the breaking up
但这不代表很容易
doesn't mean it was easy.
一直给别人发好人卡也很难的
It's hard to be that person, too.
真无聊- 真逊
Boring! -Lame!
喝
Drink.
喝喝喝 -你们几个干啥呢？
Drink, drink, drink. -What's going on?
啤酒乒乓！
Beer pong!
你和我一队
You're on my team.
谁在看孩子啊？
Who's watching the baby?
她在你妈家里 扫兴鬼
She's at your mother's, Captain Buzzkill.
拿着
Here you go.
你们知道我们该干啥吗？
Ooh, you know what we should do?
点个披萨？
Order a pizza?
不是
No.
披萨也是要点的
Well, yes.
但我们还得
But also...
去把你房♥间里所有克洛伊的东西装箱
box up everything that Chloe left in your room
然后放把火烧了
and set it on fire.
好耶！那贱♥人♥去死吧
Yeah! Screw that bitch.
大家先消停点
Hold on, let's all take a little break.
谁都不许放火
Nobody's setting anything on fire.
可以确定了
It's official,
你嫁给了一个呆子
you married a dork.
这感觉太好了
This is so nice.
全家一起喝醉
Getting drunk as a family.
谢谢你今天做的一切
Thank you for today.
别谢我
Aw. Don't thank me.
去谢孤星啤酒吧
Thank Lone Star.
我知道我现在该怎么做了
I know what I need to do now.
你要是再给她打电♥话♥ 看我不杀了你
You try and call her, I will kill you.
不是
No.
我要静下心来 专注于音乐上
I'm gonna buckle down and focus on my music.
真好
Good for you.
你会成立乐队吗？
Oh, are you gonna start a band?
或者当个音乐老师？
Or teach?
还要好
Better.
疯子博士本名巴里·汉森 是美国喜剧音乐领域的标志性人物
长♥期♥主持同名广播节目 专注于播放荒诞、讽刺或反传统的音乐作品
我准备写几首歌♥ 然后寄给疯子博士
I'm gonna write some songs and send them to Dr. Demento.
他是...
And he is...
精神病医生吗？-是DJ
a psychiatrist? -He's a DJ.
他会在他的节目中放一些很酷的地下音乐
He plays all kinds of cool, underground stuff on his show.
不好意思啊
I'm sorry.
你逆转人生的计划就是
The plan to turn your life around is
寄一盘磁带给一个叫疯子的家伙
sending a tape to someone named Demento?
疯子博士
Dr. Demento.
doctor既有博士也有医生的意思
我没有贬低他医学学位的意思
Didn't mean to diminish his medical degree.
我得干活去了
I need to get to work.
他一辈子都会烂在这里的
He's gonna live here forever.
换个角度想...
Or...
这也可能是件好事啊
he's gonna live here forever!
就是这首吗？
Is that the song?
挺好听的 老兄
It's sounding good, bubba.
不是 这首歌♥只起到激励作用
No, this is just a little pump-up music I wrote
让我在写♥真♥正的歌♥时兴奋起来
to get myself psyched to write the song.
就像洛奇训练时的背景音乐 -没错
Oh, like Rocky's training music. -Exactly.
我的歌♥完成了
I finished my song.
快播放吧
Oh! Play it, play it.
歌♥名叫"成为一只蝾螈"
It's called "Do the Axolotl."
我已经听不懂了
I'm already confused.
你在说啥鸟语呢
An axle what?
一只蝾螈
An axolotl.
墨西哥的一种生物 有点像蜥蜴
It's a Mexican salamander.
成 成 成 成 成为一只蝾螈
♪ Do, do, do, do, do the axolotl♪
我在路边咳血
♪ Coughing up blood on the side of the road♪
已经不堪重负
♪ I've been run over by a heavy load♪
但生活不会再有烦心事
♪ But life's no issue♪
当我浴血重生时
♪ When I regenerate my tissue♪
成为一只蝾螈
♪ Do the axolotl...♪
我更加听不懂了
More confused.
这首歌♥是关于分手的
It's about the breakup.
怎么会是关于分手的呢？
H-How is this about the breakup?
我搜索了很多资料 研究表明
I-I did some research, and it turns out,
蝾螈是地球上为数不多的
an axolotl is one of the few creatures on earth
心脏可以再生的生物
that can regenerate its own heart.
我希望我也可以这样
That's what I'm hoping to do.
那你怎么不在歌♥里说明呢？
Well, why didn't you say that in the song?
我说了啊 你有好好听吗？
I did. Were you even listening?
来吧 改变吧
♪ Come on, do it!♪
成为一只蝾螈 -真好听 亲爱的
♪ Do the axolotl...♪ -It's so good, sweetie!
所以你听懂了是吧？
So you get it?
穿上我的舞蹈裤
♪ Put my dancin' pants on...♪
太好听了 亲爱的
It's so good, sweetie!
给我几个月的时间 如果我很幸运...
♪ I might need a couple months, but if I'm lucky...♪
疯子博士收
得州 梅德福
加州 卡尔弗城
疯子博士办公室
成为一只蝾螈
"Do the Axolotl."
成 成 成 成 成为一只蝾螈
♪ Do, do, do, do, do the axolotl♪
我在路边咳血
♪ Coughing up blood on the side of the road♪
已经不堪重负
♪ I've been run over by a heavy load♪
蛮顺口的
Catchy.
但生活不会再有烦心事
♪ But life's no issue♪
当我浴血重生时
♪ When I regenerate my tissue♪
成为一只蝾螈
♪ Do the axolotl.♪
我喜欢
I like it.