火星失业后图签（2023）

但是那个水箱是杀人机器
But the tank's a killing machine!
我们修好它了
Well, actually, we fixed it!
它其实没坏
And really, there wasn't anything wrong with it at all.
是我们急着
In all the hustle and bustle
把你无意识的身体放进去的过程中
of getting your unconscious body in there,
忘记清空的你肠胃了
we forgot to flush out your bowels.
所以你一直被那些东西噎着
So you were just choking on that stuff for weeks and weeks.
但我觉得你们搞错了
But I think there's been a mistake, y'know?
杰克顿为了一个可能是意外的事件
I think Jax took responsibility for something
承担了责任
that actually was completely an accident, maybe.
我不知道 可能
I-I don't know, it could have been something
和他无关
that had nothing to do with him.
我不知道
I just don't know.
谢谢 马里奥
Well, thank you, Mario. Thank you so much.
你担心这些干嘛
Why are you even worrying about this stuff?
你现在是梦想灵感的员工了
You're the Dreamspiration guy now.
你没空担心杰克顿
You don't got time to fret about Jax.
那家伙是个马屁精 一个废物
Guy's a total flunky. A dud.
他已经没用了 没有优势了
He's all cashed out. He's got no edge.
不像你 看看你
Not like you. Look at you!
你是一个年轻 精力充沛的主管 有一脑子的梦想
You're a young, virile executive with a head full of dreams
一身的精力
and a dick full of lead, baby!
未来无限可能
You got your whole life ahead of you.
你看起来很好 杰夫
You look great, Jeff, by the way.
你闻起来不怎么样 但是看起来很好
You... You smell like shit, but you look great.
那家伙是一个废物
Guy's a dud.
没用了
He's all cashed out.
没有优势了
He's got no edge.
每个胜利的士兵
And every victorious soldier
有一个共同点 一个优势
has one thing in common... An edge.
如果真的出问题
Shit, if things really went south,
我有足够的炮弹让这个地方
I got enough plutonium to bring this whole place
像这样倒塌
down around us like...
有些传统的谷物她喜欢
See, the thing is, some ancient grains she likes,
有些不喜欢
some ancient grains she does not like.
藜麦 喜欢
Quinoa, that's a yes.
小米 喜欢
Millet, that's a yes.
大麦 喜欢
Barley, that's a yes.
荞麦 不喜欢
Buckwheat, that's a no.
好吧
Right. Yeah.
让我问你点事
Now let me ask you something.
对于水箱 你有建议吗
You got any tips for the tank?
听着 杰克顿 我想和你说这事
Ah, l-listen, Jax, that's what I wanted to talk to you about.
我觉得你有
See, I really think there might be
别的出路
another path forward on all of this.
你记得你告诉我你有
You know how you were telling me you had
“足够的炮弹让这个地方倒塌”吗
"enough plutonium to bring this whole place down"?
Mmmmmmm.
“所有人的把柄” 你的项链
"Dirt on everybody." Y-Your necklace thing.
U-Um...
杰克顿 你的鲨鱼牙优盘
Jax! The shark tooth USB drive?
你脖子只戴了这一个东西
It... It's the only thing around your neck?
这个啊
Oh, this.
不行
Yeah, yeah, no, no, no, no.
不行 那个是
No way, man. Th... That's...
那个是为我的朋友准备的
That's for my peeps.
不能用在自己身上
Yeah, I-I'd never use it on myself.
那很自私
It would be selfish.
有时候你得自私点
Sometimes you gotta be selfish.
不行 伙计
No way, amigo.
只有混♥蛋♥是自私的
Only assholes are selfish.
如果你身处麻烦呢
If you were in trouble?
当然 我会激活核弹
Sure. I-I'd deploy the nukes.
但是不行
But no...
为了老杰克顿的话 不行
not for ol' Jax.
我和水箱有个约会
I've got a date with the tank.
我知道那里面很潮湿
I know it's gonna be pretty wet in there.
很阴暗
Pretty dark, too.
但是上帝知道我在阴影中待过很久
But lord knows I've spent plenty of time in the shadows.
慢点 伙计
Hey, easy there, bud.
上路前 再来一轮吧
Here, how about we have another round before we hit the road?
梦想之地
♪ Dreamland ♪
在那里 让我的梦想
♪ There let my dreams... ♪
慢点
Take it easy.
成真
♪ COME trueeeee ♪
好孩子 就这样
Good boy. That's it.
Whoa!
糟糕
Oh, shit!
你没事 老伙计 你没事
You're okay, old friend, you're okay.
除非你过去几年生活在石头底下
Unless you've been living under a rock for the past few years,
你一定听过这个名字 小埃利斯
you know the name Junior Ellis.
广♥告♥ 杂♥志♥ 电视露面
Commercials, magazines, television appearances,
布家牛肉汉堡店的新代言人
and the new face of Brian's Beef Barn,
就在公路27号♥出口的劳德代尔堡市中心
located right off of exit 27 in downtown Fort Lauderdale.
观众们 小埃利斯活得风生水起
Folks, little Junior Ellis is living large.
什么
What the f...?
杰克顿
Jax?
关掉
Turn it off.
我只是想
I-I was just trying to...
关掉
TURN IT OFF.
马上
NOW!
抱歉
I... Sorry, uh...
给我
Give me that!
对不起 我只是想找能救你的把柄
I-I'm sorry. I-I was just trying to get the dirt to save you.
救我的朋友
To save my peep.
我只有自己的把柄
The only dirt I got is on myself.
重350磅 松鼠脸的废柴
On that 350-pound, chipmunk-cheeked loser.
我不知道 杰克顿
I-I don't know about that, Jax, I mean, I...
挺酷的 确实你
I thought it was kind of cool. Sure, you...
你有点壮 但是
You might have been a little on the husky side, but...
我十二岁那天就改了名字
I changed my name the day I turned twelve.
过去三十年
The last 30 years?
我在改变剩下的所有
They've been about changing everything else.
过程很艰难
It's been a difficult journey.
但是我告诉你
But I'll tell you what.
当我遇到你 我意识到一件事
When I met you, I realized something.
我不一定要独自经历这个过程
I don't always gotta walk that road alone.
虽然这个水箱的事情让我要绕一个几年的路 这很糟糕
Sure it sucks I hit a multi-year detour with this tank stuff.
但是 我交到了一个好朋友
But, hey, at least I got to make a good buddy first.
最好的朋友
A best buddy.
我爱你
I love you, man.
好吧
Oh, o-okay.
我也爱你
Well, I love you, to...
我有一个梦想
I have a dream.
门边放个锣
A little gong right by the door.
敲它一下
Just give it a ring.
不用很响
Y'know, you don't always gotta ring it hard.
让它响一小声“乓”
Just give it a little "Bong."
我有事要说
There's something I-I gotta say to everyone.
一个梦想
A-A... Dream.
不是 不是梦想
No. Not a dream.
不是梦想
Not a dream?
一个小谎
A fib, actually.
我说的小谎
That I told.
严格来说 一个遗漏的信息
Technically an omission. And, well...
Uh...
是我在你的派对造成了爆♥炸♥
I'm the one who caused the explosion event at your party.
抱歉 杰夫 你在开玩笑吗
Sorry, Jeff, are you making a joke or...?
有时候我分不清
It's... It's just sometimes hard to know.
我不在开玩笑
I-I'm not making a joke.
我导致了爆♥炸♥
I caused the explosion.
哈哈 杰夫
Ha, ha, Jeff.