少男奶爸（2012）

Baby Daddy S06E07

Part 1 Nov. 30, 2020, 2:15 p.m.

You are not leaving this table
吃不完这份西兰花
until you eat all of your broccoli, young lady.
你就不准离开桌子小姑娘
Great. I've become my mother.
太棒了我变成我母亲了
Please, Emma, do it for Daddy.
拜托艾玛为了爸爸你吃吧
Okay, how 'bout just this one piece?
好吧只吃一颗好吗
Don't you give me those eyes.
别用这种眼神看我
I invented those eyes.
这种眼神是我发明的
We can do this all night, sister. Okay?
我们可以这样耗一整晚姑娘好吗
You're not leaving this table until that plate is clean.
盘里的菜不吃干净你就不准离开桌子
Well played, Emma. Well played.
很会玩啊艾玛很会玩
**It's amazing how the unexpected*
*人生妙无边惊喜无极限
**Can take your life and change directions.*
*劝君莫等闲雌雄随我愿
Well, pretty sure you're the first guy
你肯定是第一个
to pass out in a Lamaze class.
在拉梅兹减痛法课上晕倒的男人
You know, it's comforting to know that during the birth,
我很安心因为知道生产时
you'll be right there by my side...
你就在我身边...
unconscious.
毫无知觉
I'm sorry, but nobody told me
对不起但没人告诉我
we were gonna see a video of an actual birth.
我们要看真实的生产录像
God, I hope I never see that again!
天希望我再也不用看到那场面
Maybe nobody noticed.
也许没人注意呢
Yeah, well, if they didn't hear you snoring,
是吗就算他们没有听到你打呼
they definitely heard you giggle
也肯定听到
every time the instructor said
每次教员说"阴♥道♥"时
"Vagina."
你都在笑
Well, of course, I thought you said "Yogurt."
我当然以为你说的是"优格"而不是"瑜伽"
I mean, why would I want to get all sweaty and bendy with you?
我为什么会想跟你一起大汗淋漓软萌易弯
Is it just me or are you twice as big
只有我这么觉得还是你真的
as the last time I saw you?
比我上次见你大了一倍
Well, I just came by to make you an offer
我过来是为了给你提一个
you can't refuse.
你无法拒绝的建议
So, it turns out that Brad and I
最后发现布拉德和我
can't take that cruise we booked,
预定的乘船游览去不成了
because one of us committed a felony,
因为我们中有个人犯了重罪
and is in jail.
进监狱了
My money was so on you in that scenario.
这种情景我肯定压钱赌你
Well, the tickets are nonrefundable,
所有的票都退不了
so, I thought you might like to go.
所以我觉得你可能愿意去
Oh my God, really? A cruise?
我的天啊真的吗乘船游览吗
I've-- I've never been on one.
我... 我从来没有过这种经历
Mrs. Wheeler that's so amaze Okay, shh.
维勒太太那太好... 行了
Not you and Danny.
不是你和丹尼
Me and Danny, okay?
是我和丹尼好吗
I mean, do you really want to be seen in a bikini right now?
你现在真的想让人看到你穿比基尼的样子吗
Me thinks not.
我觉得不会
Plus, I thought it would be a really fun mother/son bonding trip.
另外我觉得这会是一个很好的母子游
I mean, somebody never lets us have any fun anymore.
有人害我们再也不能一起愉快地玩耍了
Oh, man, wow!
矮油天呐
Just wow, but--
就感叹一下但...
I don't know, Mom. I mean,
我不知道啊妈
we've been pretty busy with these Lablahzery classes.
我们一直在忙着上拉什么玩意的分娩课
Ah, Lamaze.
哦拉梅兹啊
The poor man's epidural.
给弱鸡准备的无痛分娩法
Yeah, but they're super important to Riley.
对但这些对莱丽来说特别重要
Oh, oh, you know, we're good. It was a special.
没关系那是特别课程
One and done. We are 100% ready to have this baby.
一次就够我们已经完全准备好生孩子了
Hey, Tucker, can I talk to you for a second?
塔克尔我能跟你说句话吗
I mean, I doubt it. You're pretty long-winded.
我很怀疑你那么啰嗦
Danny, this cruise is gonna be so much fun!
丹尼这个巡游会非常好玩
You know, I took a Lamaze class once.
我上过一次无痛分娩课
I got thrown out for giggling every time
被扔出来了因为每次
the instructor said "Vagina."
教员说"阴♥道♥"时我都要笑
Man, I thought you said there would be hot chicks here.
天我以为你说这里会有美妞
There are.
是有
They're just pregnant.
只是她们都怀孕了
Yeah.
好了
Oh my God. Oh my God!
我的天啊我的天啊
My ex-girlfriend from high school's over there!
我高中女友在那里
Crap! She can't see me like this.
该死不能让她见到我这副样子
She dumped me so hard in the middle of cheerleading practice.
拉拉队才训练到一半她就狠狠地甩了我
Wow, that must've been awkward.
那一定很尴尬
Yeah! Considering I was on top of the pyramid at the time.
是的因为我那时是队里金字塔尖的位置
I have been planning my revenge moment for years.
我策划复仇这么多年
I mean, I'm supposed to be living large right now!
我现在的生活应该很高大上啊
Not sitting on an old, smelly pillow
而不是跟我又胖又多汗的朋友
at the Y with my fat, sweaty friend.
坐在一个又旧又臭的枕头上上课
I'm pregnant.
我怀孕了
Yeah, that's what I said. Fat and sweaty.
是啊我说了又胖又多汗
Tucker?
塔克尔
Tucker Dobbs, is that really you?
塔克尔·多不思真的是你吗
Adrienne? Adrienne!
艾德丽安艾德丽安
Wow! What a-- What a small world!
这世界... 这世界真小啊
What-- What are you doing here?
你怎么在这
I'm guessing the same as you. Having a baby!
我想和你是一样的要生孩子了
Oh, you must be Tucker's wife!
你一定是塔克尔的妻子了
Oh, we're not Into bragging.
我们不... 喜欢自吹自擂
But! But this is--
但是但是这是...
This is my smart, beautiful, lawyer wife, Riley.
我聪明美丽的律师妻子莱丽
She's a lawyer.
她是个律师
She used to be a swimsuit model before she got fat.
她发胖之前是个泳装模特
Wow! Wow, and look at you with-- with the husband.
天啊看看你和你的...丈夫
Oh, crazy, right? This is my Joe.
真是疯狂啊是吧这是我的乔
Joe, this is my old friend from high school, Tucker.
乔这是我高中的老朋友塔克尔
Kinda more than a friend.
不只是朋友哦
Oh! Were you that cheerleader dude?
老兄你当时也在拉拉队里吧
Okay.
好吧
Well, great catching up, right?
聊得很愉快
Oh, what's the rush?
急什么呀
You know, we should have lunch,
我们四个人应该一起
the four of us.
吃个午饭
I know we're free right now.
我知道我们现在都有时间
Uh, yeah, if it's not awkward, or any--
好啊如果不尴尬的话或者...
Oh, no, that's okay. I love awkward.
没关系我喜欢尴尬
Awkward can be fun.
尴尬可以很有趣
What do you mean Mom is sending you and Riley on a cruise?
你说老妈要送你和莱丽去乘船旅行是什么意思
Why would she do that? What's the catch?
她为什么要这么做有什么目的
No catch. She just thought with the baby--
没什么目的啊她只是想到孩子...
Hey, I've had a kid for over three years,
我养孩子都三年多了
and what's she ever given me?
她给过我什么
Well, actually, she has been kind of invaluable with Emma.
其实她对艾玛而言一直都很重要
But that's no cruise!
但是没有乘船旅行呀
What up, sons of bitches?
怎么了婊♥子♥养♥的♥
That's right, I just called myself a bitch.
没错我刚刚叫我自己婊♥子♥了
You know why? Because I embrace my flaws.
你们知道为什么吗因为我接受自己的缺点
You see, boys, life is about confidence, courage.
孩子们生活就是要有信心和勇气
And you know what gives me courage?
你们知道给我勇气的是什么吗
Booze, you got any?
酒你们有酒吗
No, and I'm glad you're here.
没有我很高兴你来了
Let's talk about Mexico, shall we?
我们谈谈墨西哥好吗
Okay, I'll go first. I like it!
好吧我先来我喜欢墨西哥
I can't believe you only thought about Danny for this vacation.
我真是不敢相信这次度假你只想到了丹尼
I should get to go on a cruise, too.
我也应该有乘船旅行的机会
Well, you know, to be honest, sweetie,
你知道的老实说亲爱的
I didn't think you'd be interested.
我觉得你不会感兴趣的
Why not?
为什么
I tan well, I look great in shorts,
我皮肤晒得很好看我穿短裤很帅
and quite frankly, I've always wanted to order a pink drink
而且老实说我一直都想毫不脸红地
without feeling ashamed.
点一杯粉色饮料
Well, Ben, all you had to do was ask
本你只要问问自己
if you wanted to spend some alone time with your mom.
你想不想和老妈单独相处一段时间