一起单身（2018）

I want to be friends with Megan and Chris.
你干嘛要和他们做朋友
Why are you trying to be friends with Megan and Chris?
他们无聊得像成了精的航♥空♥杂♥志♥
They're so boring. They're like if an in-flight magazine became people.
如果要我演的正常些 那反会变得更糟糕
And if I try and act normal, it gets worse.
-放松 -又要我放松又要我正常... 那我成什么了
- Be cool! - Again with these... Cool and normal, what am I?
-他们可算来了 -我就说嘛
- There they are! - There they are!
艾丝特 想来一杯白索维农吗
Esther, can I pour you a glass of Sauvignon Blanc?
戴夫·马休斯[演员]的葡萄园产的哦
It's from Dave Matthews' vineyard.
我才不要呢 克里斯
That's a double no for me, Chris.
我向来不支持明星周边产品
I don't support celebrity side-projects.
那来玩猜词游戏吧
Okay, Scattergories!
我们得组队对抗克里斯 因为他老是赢
And we all have to gang up on Chris, because he always wins.
克里斯啊
Chris!
我可以说是词汇专家了
I'm a bit of a logophile.
我办公室放着"一日一词"的月历呢
I keep a-word-a-day calendar at the office.
还真是
He does.
呆伯特: 连环漫画 主人公呆伯特是一位对手下什么都爱管的白领
我还以为你会比较喜欢"呆伯特"呢
I would have taken you for more of a Dilbert guy.
凯西: 连环漫画 主人公凯西挣扎在食物 爱情 家庭和工作中 漫画揭露现代女性的生活和弱点
以前是啊 可后来梅根让我爱上了"凯西"
I was. That is until Megan got me into Cathy.
我就问一下... 咱真要玩猜词游戏吗
Quick question... are we 100% for sure on Scattergories?
因为我倒喜欢像过家家
Just 'cause I really like games like Pretty Pretty Princess
或糖果大♥陆♥那种有玩具的游戏
or Candy Land where the pieces are toys.
讲真 我喜欢猜词游戏
Actually, I like Scattergories.
我会玩得很开心的 克里斯和梅根
I'm having a great time, Chris and Megan.
-真的吗... -杰夫 除了猜词游戏我们还有更好的周末计划
- What... - Jeff, we've had so many good weekend trips without Scattergories.
你别这样 老哥
Come on, dude.
还记得我最辉煌的时候在圣达菲的事吗
Remember Santa Fe when I was going through my turquoise phase?
那可太好玩了
That was so much fun.
我们用手♥机♥拍了段模仿"玉米田的小孩"[恐怖剧]的视频
We did a Children of the Corn parody on our phones.
咱要不拍个恐怖电影吧
Let's shoot a scary short film.
听上去真有趣
That sounds fun.
让我演杀人犯吧
Ooh, can I be the killer?
因为电视上还从没出现过由印度女性扮演的反♥社♥会♥杀人犯
'Cause, you know, there's never been a sociopathic murderer that's an Indian girl.
好莱坞可太糟糕了
Hollywood is so messed up.
要不拍一部"大熊女巫"
What about The Big Bear Witch Project?
就像"女巫布莱尔"那样
So it's like The Blair Witch Project,
只不过我们在大熊 所以我改了一下
except that we're in Big Bear. So I just substituted.
克里斯 你可真会开玩笑
Chris, you really went past the joke there.
或者我们可以拍"鬼熊实录"
Ooh, or we could do Bearanormal Activity,
-就跟"鬼影实录"那样... -我们懂
- like Paranormal Activity... - We get it.
我们能想到 谢谢
We'll connect the dots, thank you.
两个都拍吧
Why don't we just do both?
我跟杰夫和克里斯去拍"大熊镇女巫"
Me and Jeff will do Bear Witch with Chris,
你们去拍"鬼熊实录"
and you guys can do Bearanormal Activity.
-我们和梅根吗 -我觉得我跟杰夫和艾丝特
- Us with Megan? - Well, I feel like Me, Jeff, and Esther
更有默契一点
sort of have rapport already.
我们有点像五分钟低成本恐怖电影中的
We're sort of like the Elaine, George, Jerry
伊莱恩跟乔治和杰瑞宋飞正传"中的角色] 要不咱仨组队吧
of five-minute low-budget horror films, so why don't we group up?
不 别这样 还是换换人吧
No, let's not do that. Let's mix it up, man.
好主意 克里斯读大学时学了好几年电影
Good call. Chris took film in college for a couple years,
后来才转行去做医药销♥售♥
before he pivoted into pharmaceutical sales.
制药这些东西不是对国家有害吗
Isn't pharmaceutical stuff really bad for the country?
我知道外面有个超级阴森的地方
Well, I know the perfect spooky spot outside.
-没错 -跟着我
- Yes, you do. - Join me.
好的 我们走
Okay! Let's go!
我觉得我肯定很擅长
I think I'm gonna be good at this.
我感觉我从来没擅长过什么
I've never felt like I would be good at anything.
那是啥感觉
What is that like?
说出来你可能不信
You're not gonna believe this.
我刚跟镇上的人通过电♥话♥
But I just got off the phone with a town's person
他和我说
who told me that this cabin
这个小屋是建在一座古代马戏团坟场上
was built on an ancient circus burial ground.
有人说 那儿有鬼熊出没
Some say there's a lot of Bearanormal Activity in here.
这么吓人的事 你怎么在笑
And it's scary, so you shouldn't be smiling.
去看看我们的朋友吧
Now let's go check on our friend.
他不相信有鬼
He doesn't believe in ghosts.
现在他应该也这么想 他刚走进另一间房♥
Surely nothing has changed since he went in the other room
调查怪声了
to investigate that noise.
鬼熊咬断了我的腿
A ghost clown bear ate my legs!
不不不
No! No! No!
搞什么 卡
Excuse me? Cut.
喊得真棒 梅根
Great scream, Megan.
谢谢 刚这一幕肯定拍得超棒
Thank you. I think that's gonna be a really neat take.
我一会儿要发到脸书上
I'm gonna post it to Facebook later.
我先看看我的芝士奶油馄饨弄得怎样了
I gotta go check on my cream cheese salsa wontons.
听起来不错
Sounds great.
芝士奶油云吞听起来可还行 但梅根烂透了
Cream cheese salsa wontons sound amazing, but Megan sucks.
她朋友才刚被鬼熊咬了
Her friend just got eaten by a bear ghost,
但她却叫得像有人送了她只小狗一样开心
and she screamed like someone gave her a puppy.
要不把剧本改成真有人送了只小狗给她吧
Do we change the plot so someone does hand her a puppy?
-老铁 -我只是在想解决办法
- Dude. - I'm just trying to think of solutions here.
这女的还在用脸书
The girl still uses Facebook.
你想怎么和这种人商量
How do you work with someone like that?
怎么回事
What was that?
-他竟然有灯光 -升降镜头该进了
- He has lights? - Cue the crane shot.
他的确有灯
He does have lights.
他还有张曲棍球面具
And he's got a hockey mask!
老兄 他的行头比我们还好
Dude, he has better wardrobe than us.
这可是我们的老本行啊
We're supposed to be better than him at this,
却被他虐爆了
and he's beating us!
我们才不会被他虐呢
He's not gonna beat us,
因为归根结底还得靠演技
because it's gonna come down to performance.
我们必须让梅根好好尖叫
And we're gonna get a scream out of Megan,
还必须得真实
and it's gonna be real.
各位 来吃芝士奶油馄饨吧
Guys, it's cream cheese salsa wonton time.
死亡海狸
Death beaver!
停
Cut!
拍到了
We got it.
能再来一条吗
Could we go again?
我弄成拍照模式了
I was taking a photo.
不不不
No, no, no, no.
克里斯
Chris?
梅根 她喊停了 但我很欣赏你这么入戏
Megan, she said cut, but I appreciate the commitment.
而且 咱电影台词里没有"克里斯"这词
Also, we haven't established a "Chris" in the world of our movie,
所以不用...
so it doesn't...
怎么了
What's going on?
发生什么了
What's going on?!
我的天 抱歉
My gosh. I'm so sorry.
-你还好吗 -是的
- Are you okay. - Yeah.
注意你的血压
Remember your blood pressure.
坐坐坐
Sit, sit, sit, sit, sit.
怎么回事
What happened?
电影特效
Movie magic happened.
没事了 没事了
Yeah, yeah, it's okay. It's okay.
明天一早我们就叫戈登医生来 好吗
We'll call Dr. Gordon first thing tomorrow, okay?
好
Okay.
为什么需要去叫医生
Why do you need to call a doctor?
她就是被吓到了
She just got startled.
肯定她没事的
I'm sure she's fine.
是啊 没有人真被吓死啊
Yeah, no one ever died from being startled.
我也不知道是不是真的
I don't know if that's true.
没关系 因为你们都不知道 梅根怀孕了
Look, it's okay because you didn't know, but Megan's pregnant.
我的天 梅根 真的吗
My God! Megan, really?!
原本想明天早午餐后告诉你们
We were gonna tell you over brunch tomorrow.
我好激动啊
I am so excited!
我代表我和海狸·布朗向你们道歉
On behalf of me and Beaver Brown, I just wanted to apologize.
不是叫它贾斯汀·海狸吗
I thought we were going with Justin Beaver.
我不同意
Wasn't a hard yes.
我们该睡了
You know, I think we're gonna go to bed.
今天真是太累了
It's kind of been a long day.
我陪你们