倾听男人心

So wait, wait, hold up.
这就是为什么你会邀请我们参加比赛
That's why you really invited us to the game?
不是因为你误会我背着死去的老婆跟你上♥床♥
No. Not to make up for the fact
然后想补偿我的吗
that you accused me of cheating on my dead wife with you?
不
No.
拜托 这很复杂的
Please, it is very complicated.
-让我单独和你谈谈 -谈什么
- Just let me talk to you alone. - About... About what?
谈什么 谈你怎么利用我儿子 我的孩子作假吗
About what? How you used my son, my child, as a prop?
就
Just...
拜托 请离我们远点
Please. Please stay away from us.
拜托
Please.
这个能力毁了我的生活
These powers have ruined my life.
我想还回去
I would like to return them.
或者任何你能做的把它们去掉
Or whatever you do with powers.
哎 说实话
Well, if I can be real,
我会喝完海地茶 自己全喝光
I finished off the Haitian tea, drunk it all myself.
-还有 -我听到的唯一声音
- And... - The only voices I heard
就是Joan Rivers和Tupac
were Joan Rivers and Tupac.
他俩处不来
And they did not get along.
天哪 这是场灾难
My God, this is a disaster.
也许你想事情的角度不对
Mm. Maybe you looking at it the wrong way.
有了能力 就有义务说出真♥相♥
With power comes a responsibility to tell the truth.
你说了吗
Have you been telling the truth?
你要让心灵指引你
You need to let the spirit guide you.
-心灵 -是啊
- The spirit. - Yeah.
心灵
Spirit.
哎呀 嘿 也许我们能 呃 喝慢点
Yikes. Hey, maybe we, uh, take it easy on the drinky-drink there.
仪式就要开始了 你也要参加的 好吗
Ceremony's about to start and you're in it, okay?
不 不 不 我要酸梅伏特加
No, no, no. I need a cranberry vodka
因为我感觉到了心灵 Brandon
because I'm feeling the spirit, Brandon.
我有话 有话就要喷涌而出了
I have words, they need saying.
事实上 这里的每个人
As a matter of fact, everybody in here
都需要一大杯热气腾腾的热茶
needs a big, steaming mug of hot tea.
哦 或者可能每个人喝水就好了 你知道
Oh, or maybe everybody just sticks with water, you know...
不 不不不 你去拿我要的伏特加
No. No, no, no. How about you go get that vodka cran like I said,
亲爱的助理 去吧
Trusty assistant. Go.
基♥督♥说
And Christ said,
人要离开父母 与妻子连合
"A man shall leave his mother and father and cleave to his wife,
二人成为一体 所以他们不再是两个
so that they are no more twain..."
尝尝美味的奥利奥伴娘三明治
Check out that tasty Oreo bridesmaid sandwich.
我真不敢相信用伟哥能撑这么久
I can't believe how long this Viagra's lasting!
真不敢相信我因为这狗屁玩意错过了比赛
Can't believe I'm missing the game for this shit.
我把钥匙放在桌子上了吗
Did I leave my keys on my desk?
♪ 瞎眼的乔 ♪
♪ Cotton-eyed Joe ♪
♪ 我结婚很久了 ♪
♪ I'd been married A long time ago ♪
♪ 你从哪儿来 又到哪儿去 ♪
♪ Where did you come from? Where did you go? ♪
哦 伙计 这套衣服真让我毛骨悚然
Oh, man. This suit's giving me a swamp ass.
我喜欢托莱多的发音 托 莱 多
I love the word "Toledo." To-le-do.
真不敢相信我对快递小哥说了我爱你
Can't believe I said "I love you" to the delivery guy.
看看Gabby那个奶♥子♥晃得
Look at Gabby's tits just hanging out.
自从Mari去波士顿后就没再摸过
Haven't tapped that since Mari was in Boston.
好想早日再摸摸
Might need to get that again soon though.
女士们先生们 新郎和新娘
Ladies and gentlemen, the bride and groom
写下了自己的誓言
have written their own vows.
-James -是的 先生
- James? - Yes, sir.
六月下午的那个阳光斑驳的日子
When I met you on that sun-dappled June afternoon
在华夫饼屋里我初次遇见你的时候
at the Waffle House...
他还会说 斑驳的
He said, "dappled".
你把整瓶热酱汁
...and you put that whole bottle of hot sauce
倒在两份饼上时
on your two-piece...
我当时就知道 不会有更合适我的人了
I knew right then there'd never be another woman for me.
哦 天哪 我很抱歉 我很抱歉
Oh, God. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.
-我非常非常抱歉 -什么鬼
- I'm so, so sorry. - What the hell?
我 有话要说
I... have something I gotta say.
你在做什么
What are you doing?
姑娘 我在让心灵引导我
Girl, I am letting the spirit move me.
我
I...
我有了一种能力
I've been given a gift.
可能来自上帝
Possibly by God.
可能租金比较低
Possibly by a low-rent,
做头发的 搞大♥麻♥的通灵师什么的 但是
hair-styling, weed-dealing psychic. But...
我能听到男人的想法
I can hear men's thoughts.
Ali 你为什么不过来
Ali, why don't you just come
和我在这坐一会儿呢
sit down here with me for a minute?
呃 Brandon 给我退下
Uh, Brandon, back up.
退下
Back up.
我只想说 作为你的朋友
I'm just saying, as your friend...
你 不是我的朋友
You... are not my friend.
你只不过是我的助理
You are my assistant, though.
现在你没助我的理
And right now you're not assisting me,
还打断了我说话
you're interrupting my message!
现在 你给我坐下来 闭上你的狗嘴
So I need you to sit down and shut the fuck up!
哈利路亚
Hallelujah.
你爱咋地咋地吧
You're on your own.
借过
Excuse me.
谢谢 谢谢
Thank... Thank you.
-感谢您与我们分享 -没完呢
- Thank you for sharing that with us. - And...
鉴于我有了这个天赋
because of my gift,
James 我知道你配不上我的朋友Mari
James, I know you are not worthy of my friend, Mari.
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
你要知道 在你俩准备结婚之前
And you need to know, before you jump the broom,
他去年五月和你表妹Gabby睡过
that he slept with your cousin Gabby last May.
-什么 -当你在波士顿的时候 姑娘
- What? - While you were in Boston, girl.
那个 这从来没有发生过
That... That never happened.
没有 从来没有发生过
That never, never happened.
我很抱歉 Mari 他说你俩分开了
I am so sorry, Mari. He said you were on a break.
这是真的吗
Is this true?
所有人都在撒谎
Everybody lying right now.
-Mari -哇 他活该 阿门
- Mari! - Whoo! He deserved that! Amen!
-给我过来 -哦 宝贝 等一下
- Bring it over here. - Oh! Baby, hold on.
Ali 别说了 时间和地点都不合适
Ali, cut it out. This is not the time or the place.
好吧 Ciarra 你家也有问题
Well, Ciarra, you have problems in your own house.
你个泥菩萨就别保别人咯
Don't throw no stones, living in a glass house.
你说什么呢 我才不是泥菩萨
Excuse me? My house is fine.
相反 我们家好得很
In fact, it's locked down.
好吗 我觉得你只是有点嫉妒
Okay? I think you're just a little jealous
因为我们都结婚了
because we're all married.
我一直有这种感觉
I have always felt that way.
-你俩 认真的吗 -是的
- Are you ser... Really? - Yeah.
所以看看你自己
So look at yourself.
你丈夫那话儿已经被人舔过了
Well, your husband has been getting his thing sucked,
和他高尔夫球伴Louis的隐秘生活啊
on the down-low, by his golf buddy Louis.
我一直感觉是那么回事儿
I have always felt that way.
他什么 你疯了吗
He what? You've lost your mind.
我绝不会做那事儿 太恶心了
I would never. That's disgusting!
你吸我鸡♥巴♥的时候可不是这么说的
It wasn't when you were sucking on my dick!
哦 上帝 别在教堂说这些
Oh, Lord, not in the church!
你用吸鸡♥巴♥的嘴唇吻我
You kissed me with dick on your lips?
敢打我弟弟 抱着Terence
That's my brother. Hold Terence.
哦 真的吗 我的头发
Oh, really? My hair!
-吃吧 把这假发吃了 -多大的人了这都
- Eat it! Eat the wig! - Just grow up.
贱♥货♥
Bitch!
往后退
Stay back!
喂 你好 欢迎回来
Well, hello. Welcome back.
我只想说
I'd just like to say...
你上次住院之后 我就去戒毒了
since your last visit, I went to detox
我的生活又回到正轨
and I got my life back on track.
所以 谢谢
So, thank you.
真的吗
That's it?
什么真的
That's what?
我什么也没听到