圣诞前夜（2015）

I'm kind of having a hard time. It's confusing me a little bit.
你能帮我一下吗？
You think you can maybe help me out?
当然可以 帮我拿一下我的手杖
Sure, hold my cane for a second.
太棒了，没问题 我帮你拿一下手杖
Awesome. Sure, I'll hold your cane.
圣诞节快乐，艾萨克
Hey, Merry Christmas, Isaac.
你也圣诞快乐
Merry Christmas to you too, man.
谢谢
Thanks.
今晚真的太疯狂了
I've been having a pretty crazy night.
我要跟你说 我现在简直一团糟
I'm gonna level with you, I'm a little fucked up right now.
不会吧
- Heh-heh. No way. You don't say? - Yeah. Yeah.
真的
- 你叫什么名字？ - 史宾塞
- What's your name? - Spencer.
我家人在那边
That's my family over there.
嗨，我叫艾萨克，你好
Hi! I'm Isaac, nice to meet you.
- 你好吗？ - 嘿
- What's up, man? - Hey.
你养狗啊
You have dogs.
- 我能拍拍它们吗？ - 拍吧，它们很温驯
- Can I pet them? - Go ahead. They're fine.
- 谢谢你 - 不客气
- Thank you. - You're very welcome.
- 嗨，各位 - 艾萨克，你好吗？
- Hi, guys. - What's up, Isaac?
来拍拍我们
Come on and give us a pat.
老天，它们会说话
Oh my God, they talk! Ha-ha.
当然，所有的狗都会说话
Of course. All dogs can talk.
- 这里还有一只 - 好痒
- There's another one. - That tickles.
嗨，我爱你
Oh, hi. I love you.
伊萨克？
Isaac?
贝兹！
Betsy.
糟糕
Oh, shit.
嗨
Hi.
哇
Wow. Ha-ha-ha.
- 嗨 - 嗨
- Hi. - Hi.
好了
Oh. Okay.
我绝对不会放掉你
I never wanna let go.
怎么了？
What's happening?
你跑到这里干嘛？
What are you doing here right now?
你跑进马槽布置场景里干嘛？
What were you doing in the nativity scene?
我跟史宾塞他们家人在一起
I was hanging out with Spencer and his family.
- 他们人真的很好 - 史宾塞？
- They're really beautiful people. - Spencer?
他们人很棒 而且家里是不同人种混血
They're great people. They're interracial.
亲爱的，你干嘛拿着手杖？
Why do you have the staff, honey?
现在到底怎么回事？ 我们在哪里？
What's happening right now? Where are we now?
这里是教堂，你记得吗？
This is the church. Do you remember?
- 你来参加教堂活动？ - 是的
- You're here for that? - Yes.
我告诉你你现在最好离开
And I'm just telling you right now that you need to go...
因为我家人正在付计程车钱
...because my family is paying for the cab right now.
他们出现之前，你得速速离开
So you need to get out of here before they show up.
- 你家人也来了？ - 是的
- Your family is coming? - Yeah.
- 你从另一个方向离开 - 我该去哪里？
- So maybe go and run the other way. - Where should I go?
他们到达之前消失就是 快走
Just fucking go before they get here. Go.
我爱你，知道吗？ 我爱你
I love you. Okay? I love you.
- 好，我爱你，再见 - 好的，再见
- Okay. I love you. Bye. - All right, bye.
你非常贴心，再见
That's very sweet. Bye.
怎么又回来了？ 往那个方向走！
What are you coming back for? Just go that way!
我不知道要往…
I don't know where...
不，别进教堂
No, no, no! Not inside the church.
快离开
Go, go, go.
快离开这里
Get the fuck out of here.
- 等一下，我认识他们，嗨！ - 嗨
- Wait. I know them. Hi! - Hi.
嗨！
Hi!
- 老天，瞧瞧你们 - 见到你真好
- Oh, my God! Look at you guys. - It's so good to see you!
帽子真可爱
What a hat.
你干脆一起来吧 一起来午夜弥撒
Why don't you come join us. Come on in for midnight mass.
不，这不太好
Oh, no. I don't think that's a good idea.
为什么不好？
Why not?
因为他今天晚上有个 朋友的聚会，是吧，艾萨克？
Because he's hanging out with his friends tonight. Right, Isaac?
- 我没看见其他人 - 我不知道他们现在人在哪里
- I don't see anybody. - I don't know where they are right now.
- 跟我们一起进来坐 - 我从没进过教堂
- Come sit with us. - I've never been in a church.
来吧
Come on.
好，是吗？
Okay. Yeah?
好，太棒了 回头里面见！
Yeah. Great! I'll see you in there!
我们一起做午夜弥撒
Let's go to midnight mass together.
好的，就照你说的
Okay. Yeah, if you say so.
帮我们留个位子
Save us a seat.
你现在情况有多糟糕？
How fucked up are you right now?
贝兹，我很好 我是你的巨石
I'm not fucked up at all, Betsy. I'm your rock.
你像是个裂开的巨石
You look like a crack rock.
我才没有，别这么说 你在生我的气？
I'm not. Don't say that. Are you mad at me?
- 没有，拜托你走好 - 我走得很好
- No, just walk normal, please. - I'm walking normal.
你才没有
No, you're not.
艾萨克，别放在那里
Don't put it there, Isaac. Okay.
不见了
And it's gone.
嗨，圣诞节快乐
Hi. Merry Christmas.
你要赋予尿尿生命吗？
Are you giving birth to piss?
老天，我只是小心 别尿到我的裤子
Oh, my God. I'm just trying not to shit my pants.
- 你的确该小心点 - 我该小心点？
- You should. - I should?
你直接尿了吧 为什么不行？
You should just do it. Why not?
我该尿在裤子里
I should just drop a deuce in my shorts.
尿啊
Just do it!
太棒了，又有两个 不在乎圣诞节的混球
That's great. Two more assholes that don't give a fuck about Christmas.
什么？
What?
你们在干嘛？
What are you guys doing?
圣诞老人趴，老兄！
Santa pub crawl, bro!
各位，圣诞老人 对很多人来说意义重大
Guys, Santa Claus is a very meaningful thing to a lot of people.
对很多孩子很重要！
A lot of children.
是这样子的，对于那些孩子来说 他们活在谎言里！
Here's the thing, man. For those kids, they're living a fucking lie!
是啊，残酷的现实
Yeah. Spoiler alert:
圣诞老公公不是这真的 你这充满敌意的小朋友
Santa's not real, you pricky infant.
这只是戏服而已！
This is a costume!
但当你穿上圣诞老公公的衣服 变成圣诞老公公
But when you put on that costume and you portray Santa Claus...
你就得表现他的价值
...you're taking a solemn oath to represent certain values...
表现圣诞老公公的意义
...that it represents!
你让我想起我有位 生气的小精灵
You know who you remind me of? One of my angry elves.
去你的，别叫我小精灵
Fuck! No. Look, don't call me an elf.
圣诞老公公，我骗他上钩了
I think you got him with that one, Santa.
去你的，〝别叫我小精灵〞 混球！
Fuck you, "don't call me an elf!" Motherfucker!
回去工作室 你是替我们卖♥♥命的，小精灵！
Get back to the workshop! You work for us, elf!
快滚回工作室去，小精灵！
- Go back to the workshop, elf! - Ha-ha-ha.
这小精灵在圣诞节 没有朋友一起过
This little elf has no friends on Christmas.
我朋友在那里
My friends are just down there.
在哪里？我们俩是朋友 穿着同样的衣服
Where are they? We're friends. We even dressed the same...
但你只有一个人 一个可怜虫
...but you, you're all alone, just like a fucking dum-dum.
老天，要哭了吗？
Oh, my God. Are you gonna cry? Aw.
爸爸妈妈在圣诞节抛弃你了？
Did Mommy and Daddy leave you alone on Christmas?
该死！
Oh, shit!
这是教训你这么不尊重圣诞节
That's for disrespecting the spirit of Christmas!
去你的
Oh, fuck.
去你的
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. - Fuck you!
老兄，你是不是借题发挥
Man, this really feels like it's about something else here.
绝对不是，针对此事而已
It's about this and only this! Nothing else!
我觉得你的理智要蒸发了
I think you're sublimating, man.
我不想伤害你
I do not wanna hurt you, man.
不，我要揍他 他刚刚打了我一拳
No, no, no. I wanna hurt him. He sucker-punched me.
你们这些兄弟会人♥渣♥！
You fucking frat boys.
我是整形外科医生
I'm an orthopedic surgeon.
我是三年级老师
I teach third grade, bitch!
我培育国家未来的栋梁
I shape our nation's youth!
圣诞节到底怎么了？
What is with this holiday?
让大家脑袋都不清楚了
It just fucks with people's heads.
这对你很重要
This needs to be important to you.
- 手♥机♥响了 - 好
- It's ringing. - Okay.
嘿
Hey.
嘿！嗨！
Hey! Hi!