大人物拿破仑（2004）

你今天要做什么？拿破崙
What are you gonna do today, Napoleon?
做我想做的事，天啊
Whatever I feel like I want to do. Gosh!
你的时事报告，拿破崙
Your current event, Napoleon.
上星期日本科学家《爆放》…
Last week, Japanese scientists "explaced"...
在尼斯湖底放了炸♥弹♥引爆器
placed explosive detonators at the bottom of Lake Loch Ness...
想把尼西炸出水面
to blow Nessie out of the water.
尼西同盟的寇特葛菲瑞爵士
Sir Curt Godfrey of the Nessie Alliance...
召来苏格兰当地魔法师帮忙
summoned the help of Scotland's local wizards...
针对湖跟当地居民
to cast a protective spell over the lake and its local residents...
以及寻找水怪的人施放保护咒语
and all those who seek for the peaceful existence of our underwater ally.
来吧
Yes. Yes.
来吧
Yes. Yes.
拿破崙，你整个暑假在做什么？
Hey, Napoleon, what'd you do all last summer again?
我说过我跟我叔叔在阿♥拉♥斯加猎狼獾
I told you. I spent it with my uncle in Alaska hunting wolverines.
- 你有猎到狼獾吗？ - 我猎到五十隻
- Did you shoot any? - Yes, like 50 of'em.
牠们一直攻击我的堂兄弟
They kept tryin'to attack my cousins.
在那种情况下你会做什么？
What the heck would you do in a situation like that?
你拿的是什么枪？
What kind of gun did you use?
点12的枪，你觉得呢？
A frickin' 12-gauge. What do you think?
你觉得你很幽默吗？ 走路小心一点
You think you're funny? Just watch your step.
- 但我没有… - 我只要你的零钱，拿破崙
But I didn't...
加强你们的…
我可以借用一下电♥话♥吗？
Hey, could I use your guys's phone for a sec?
发生了什么事？
Is there anything wrong?
我觉得不太舒服
I don't feel very good.
喂
Hi.
- 奶奶在吗？ - 不，她去弄头髮了
- Is Grandma there? - No, she's getting her hair done.
- 你有什么事吗？ - 你能帮我联络她吗？
- What do you need? - Can you just go get her for me?
- 我现在真的很忙 - 请她来接我
- I'm really busy right now. - Well, just tell her to come get me.
- 为什么？ - 因为我觉得不太舒服
- Why? - 'Cause I don't feel good.
你去找过校护了吗？
Well, have you talked to the school nurse?
不，她什么都不懂
No, she doesn't know anything.
- 你能来接我吗？ - 不
- Will you just come get me? - No.
- 那么你能帮我一个忙吗？ - 什么？
- Well, will you do me a favor then? - What?
- 你能帮我拿护脣膏来吗？ - 不，拿破崙
- Can you bring me my ChapStick? - No, Napoleon.
但我的嘴唇真的好痛
But my lips hurt real bad.
跟校护借护脣膏
Just borrow some from the school nurse.
我知道她的抽屉裡有五根护脣膏
I know she has, like, five sticks in her drawer.
我不要用她的护脣膏，变♥态♥
I'm not gonna use hers, you sicko.
再见
See ya.
笨蛋
Idiot!
大卫戴普克请到办公室
David Dempke, please come to the offiice.
你懂英文吗？这一点都不複杂
You do understand English? This isn't that complex.
听着，餐厅在走廊底，右转下楼
Look, the cafeteria's down the hall to the right and downstairs.
他是新来的吗？
Hey, is that a new kid or something?
拿破崙，他是培多罗
Napoleon, this is Pedro.
你能带他到他的置物柜去吗？
Would you mind showing him where his locker is?
没问题
Sure.
来吧
Come on.
学校裡有很多帮派
You know, there's, like, a buttload of gangs at this school.
有个帮派要我加入
This one gang kept wanting me to join...
因为我是很棒的弓箭手
'cause I'm pretty good with a bow staff.
- 你搭公车上学吗？ - 不，我骑脚踏车
- Do you ride the bus to school? - No. I ride my bike.
- 你骑什么样的脚踏车？ - 铁鎚牌的
- What kind of bike do you have? - It's a Sledgehammer.
天啊
Dang!
你有避震器跟挂勾
You got shocks, pegs.
真幸运
Lucky!
你曾经骑着它飞过半空中吗？
You ever take it off any sweet jumps?
刚刚你大概飞了三呎高
You got, like, three feet of air that time.
我可以试一下吗？
Can I try it really quick?
我喜欢
I love the way...
妳的沙金色头髮
your sandy hair...
飞舞的样子
floats in the air.
对我来说那像是催眠曲
To me it's like a lullaby.
我只是想飞得高高的
I'm just flying by, oh, so high...
就像绑在棍子上的风筝
like a kite tied to a stake.
学校情况如何？
How was school?
这是我一生中最糟糕的一天。妳觉得呢？
The worst day of my life. What do you think?
我要你去看看蒂娜要不要吃这个
Well, I want you to go see if Tina wants some of this.
奇普今天什么都没做
Kip hasn't done flipping anything today.
听着，今晚我跟你们的… 奇普，认真听
Look, tonight me and your... Kip, listen!
什么？
What?
今晚我跟你们的阿姨要去拜访一些朋友
Tonight me and your aunt are gonna go visit some friends...
我们明天才会回来
and we're not gonna be back till tomorrow.
我们的牛排快吃完了
We're gettin' low on steak...
我会请凯利明天过来处理一下
so I got Lyle comin' over tomorrow to take care of it.
- 有什么吃的？ - 别闹了，拿破崙
- Well, what's there to eat? - Knock it off, Napoleon.
帮自己做墨西哥牛肉饼
Make yourself a dang quesadilla!
好吧
Fine!
我明天就会回来
I'll be back tomorrow.
你把薯条都吃完了，奇普
Stay home and eat all the freakin' chips, Kip!
拿破崙，别嫉妒
Napoleon, don't be jealous...
我整天上网跟辣妹聊天
that I've been chatting online with babes all day.
而且我们都知道 我在接受笼子斗士的训练
Besides, we both know I'm training to become a cage fighter.
从什么时候开始，奇普？你的反应糟到不行
Since when, Kip? You have the worst reflexes of all time.
- 来打我吧，拿破崙 - 什么？
- Try and hit me, Napoleon. - What?
我说过来这裡看看 你真的打我有什么下场
I said come down here and see what happens if you try and hit me.
真是个笨蛋
Such an idiot.
让我看看你的厉害
Let me see what your best move is.
我去开门
I'll go get it.
天啊
Geez!
你好，你想变成这样吗？
Um, hello. Would you like to look like this?
她是女生
This is a girl.
因为这是有时效性的
Because for a limited time only...
黛比写♥真♥现在打二五折
glamour shots by Deb are 75% off.
我已经在《切割珊瑚》髮廊剪过头髮
I already get my hair cut at the Cuttin' Corral.
或许你会喜欢手工艺品
Well, maybe you'd be interested in some home-woven handicrafts.
我是雷斯 雷斯拳道自卫系统的创办人
I'm Rex, founder of the Rex Kwon Do Self-Defense System.
在我的道馆跟我练上一星期，你将可以自卫
After one week with me in my dojo, you'll be prepared to defend yourself...
有灰熊般的力量
with the strength of a grizzly...
美洲狮的反射力
The reflexes of a puma...
跟人类的智慧
and the wisdom of a man.
今天来体验免费课程
Come down today for your free trial lesson!
这裡有皮绳钥匙圈
In here we have some boondoggle key chains.
本季的流行必备品
A must-have for this season's fashion.
我已经在童军营做过那些了
I already made, like, infinity of those at Scout camp.
这裡还有别人吗？
Well, is anyone else here?
我想赚大学学费
I'm trying to earn money for college.
妳妈妈要唸大学
Your mom goes to college.
下一段是…
Let's bring in that...
蒂娜，妳这个大胖子，快来吃晚餐
Tina, you fat lard. Come get some dinner.
蒂娜，快吃东西
Tina, eat. Eat the food.
吃东西
Eat the food!
请你送我进城去
It'd be nice if you could pull me into town.
我是雷斯。如果你们参加八週课程
My name is Rex, and if you study with my eight-week program...
你们将能学会自卫方法
you will learn a system of self-defense...
我在八卦阵裡打了两季，才研发出它来
that I developed over two seasons of fighting in the Octagon.
它叫做雷斯拳道
It's called Rex Kwon Do!
我需要自愿者
I need a volunteer.
好吧，就是你，快过来
Okay, you'll do. Come up here.
跟师♥父♥敬礼
Bow to your sensei. Bow to your sensei!
好吧
Okay.
我要给你一个机会
Now, I'm gonna give you one chance.
大伙们，一个机会，使出你的全力来吧
One chance, people. Give me your best shot.
好吧，那真的很棒。好吧，大家仔细看着
All right. That was pretty good. Okay. Now, watch this, everybody.
抓住我的手，另一隻手
Grab my arm. The other arm.
我的另一隻手
My other arm.
好吧，看着，我要甩开他的手并且逃开
Now watch this. I'm just gonna break the wrist and walk away.
甩开他的手，逃开
Break the wrist, walk away.
- 天啊 - 就那么简单
- Geez! - Okay. It's just that simple.
我要你踢我，快踢我