是，大臣（1980）

那我怎么办? 打岔
What do I do? Stall.
什么打岔? 所谓打岔就是回避问题
"Stall", meaning avoiding answer.
我知道什么叫打岔
Yes, I knowwhat stall means
你连伞也不给我一把就推我进了台风眼
You've sent me into a typhoon without even an umbrella
台风中伞没有用 风会把...
An umbrella's no use in wind...
闭嘴 伯纳
Shut up, Bernard
您和助手讨论完了吗?
Have you had sufficient consultation with yourofficials?
我...
I...
我来读读罗德先生揭露的不良现象
Let me read you some scandalous facts Mr Rhodes reveals,
原文如下 "赫里福郡4号♥补给站"
and I quote, "No 4 supply depot in Herefordshire,
"有2间飞机修理库 现为仓库"
two formeraircraft hangars used only forstores
"也由中♥央♥空调昼夜保持70度(21℃)"
but which are centrally-heated to 70 degrees day and night".
您有何解释? 这种细节问题需要事先查证
What do you say about that? I can't answerwithout priornotice.
不过有可能是真的 是真的 我上周查过了
It might not be true. It is. I checked.
如此铺张浪费 能有什么理由?
What reason can there be forsuch appalling extravagance?
要看存的是什么 有些材料不耐寒
Some materials deteriorate, depending on what it is.
铜质电线
Copperwire.
是啊...铜质电线?
Yes, well... copperwire?
潮湿时可能生锈
It can corrode in damp conditions.
包塑胶皮的
It's plastic-coated.
塑胶皮
Plastic-coated?
我...
I...
塑胶皮? 我会调查的
Plastic-coated? I'll certainly have it looked into.
他还说 贵部坚持集中采购钢笔 铅笔 回形针
He says you ordering all pens, paperclips and so on centrally
然后按各部门的需求发放
then distributing them against departmental requisitions.
情有可原 批发能节约成本啊
That seems to be quite sensible. Savings through bulk purchase.
据他论证 这样做的实际支出比职员
He demonstrates that this is fourtimes more expensive
自己去大街上买♥♥还贵4倍
than if officers bought what they want on the High Street.
挺有趣的
Very interesting.
果真如此 我们就改革 我们并非顽固的官老爷
If so, we'll change the system. We're not a rigid bureaucracy.
他说他在职期间提过这个建议
He proposed this change when he was in yourdepartment,
但大家安于现状 把它否决了
it was turned down, people were used to the existing procedure
这不是"顽固的官老爷'吗? 我会调查的
How's that forrigid bureaucracy? I'll have it looked into.
会调查? 对
"Looked into"? Yes
上周你的华盛顿演讲中提到
You said in yourWashington speech lastweek
你们部厉行节约 可谓世界楷模
that you conducted a waron waste, teach the world a lesson.
那又如何解释你们花费75000磅建造
How do you reconcile thatwith spending ?5,000 on a roof garden
凯特灵津贴办公室的楼顶花♥园♥呢?
on top of the supplementary benefits office in Kettering?
我...我会...
I'm... I'll...
会调查? 对 我会的
Have it looked into? Yes Yes, I will
主席先生 行政部常任秘书下周出席委员会
The DAA's Permanent Secretary is due to appearnextweek.
他来回答不是正好吗?
Isn't he the appropriate person to answerthe questions?
谢谢 通知汉弗莱爵士
Thank you. See that Sir Humphrey's notified.
也许您也该让他看看这些指责?
Perhaps you might let him see the allegations?
"为浪费公♥款♥辩白"? "行政大哉问"?
"Allegations of Governmentwaste"? "Big questions to answer"?
大臣 您让我进退两难 那我呢?
You've put me in a difficult position What about me?
首相要求节约 人家都在节约 就我们在浪费
The PM's demanding economies, we wast all this money
大臣 没人真的在节约 您该知道吧
No one's been saving anything, you should know that
但他们样子做得很好啊
They look as though they have.
您不能打岔吗? 什么打岔?
Couldn't you have stalled? Stalled?
转移焦点
Blurred things a bit.
您最会转移焦点啊 什么?
You're good at blurring the issue. What?
您有卓越的才华 能让状况难以理解 大臣
You have a considerable talent formaking things unintelligible.
你说什么 不不 我这是夸您
I beg yourpardon I mean that as a compliment.
转移焦点是大臣的基本技能之一
Blurring the issue is one of the basic ministerial skills.
还有哪些?
And the others?
拖延决策 回避问题
Delaying decisions, dodging questions,
玩弄数据 歪曲事实 掩盖错误
juggling figures, bending facts and concealing errors.
我该做什么?
Whatwas I to do?
做个样子 实际上什么也不做
Make it look like you'd do something and do nothing.
就像您以前做的一样
Like you usually do.
可如果指责是真的... 很好 大臣 "如果"
But if these revelations are true... Exactly, Minister, "if".
您可以谈真伪问题
You could have discussed truth.
委员会才不关心事情真伪
The committee isn't interested in truth.
他们都是国会议员
They're all MPs
安全问题呢? 铅笔算哪门子安全问题?
What about a security matter? HB pencils a security matter?
这要看铅笔写了些什么
Depends what you write with them
办公楼上干吗建花♥园♥?
Why build roof gardens on top of offices?
我们用了一家美国公♥司♥的设计图
We took overthe office design from an American company,
碰巧没人发现屋顶上有花♥园♥
it happens that nobody noticed the roof gardens on the plan
天哪
God
犯了点小错 人之常情嘛
It's a tiny mistake anyone could make.
75000磅叫小错? 那什么叫大错?
Tiny mistake, ?5,000? Give me an example of a big mistake?
让人发现了就叫大错
Letting people find out about it
放电线的棚子干吗开暖气?
Why are we heating sheds full of wire?
您要听真话? 要是不麻烦的话
You want the truth? Lf it's no trouble.
员工利用这个棚养蘑菇
The staff are using the sheds forgrowing mushrooms.
禁止掉
Stop them
他们从1945年就这么做了
They've been doing it since 1945.
养蘑菇是这份无聊工作的唯一消遣
It's the only perk in an extremely boring job.
罗德的文具采购提案为什么不理?
What about Rhodes's proposals forstationery?
他是个麻烦精 变♥态♥地迷恋效率
A trouble-makerand crank unhealthily obsessed with efficiency.
为什么不采纳他的提案? 能省几百万呢
Why didn'twe adopt his proposals and save millions?
对 但要做很多前期工作 所以呢?
Yes, but a lot of work to implement. So?
需要更多员工 汉弗莱
Taking on more staff. Humphrey
提出反证? 我哪来反证
Disprove it. I can't, obviously.
可不是 你编的?
Exactly Making it up?
当然 为什么?
Of course. Why?
演示如何对付特委会
As an example ofhow to handle a select committee.
这些都很好 汉弗莱爵士 谈细节吧
Sir Humphrey, let's get down to details.
比如那个开暖气的飞机棚 没错
This heated aircraft hangar. Indeed.
我明白委员会的顾虑
I do understand yourconcern,
但是你看 赫里福郡冬天极其寒冷
but it gets frightfully cold in Herefordshire.
即使公务员... 那里头不是公务员
Even civil servants... We aren't talking about civil servants.
是一大堆铜线 有塑胶皮保暖
We're talking coils of wire plastic-coated to keep them warm
总有员工进进出出 为什么?
Staff are in and out all the time. Why?
提货 退货 盘货
Taking deliveries, making withdrawals, checking records,
防火检查...
fire inspections...
他们可以戴手套吧? 但这是员工福利政策
They can weargloves? But it's a staff welfare policy.
这项政策花了纳税人几百万磅
I suggest this policy is costing the taxpayermillions
没话说了 汉弗莱爵士?
Nothing to say?
我无权评论国家政策 去问大臣
I can't comment on Government policy.
但你为大臣提建议
But you advise the Minister.
主席当然理解 我不能泄漏我的建议
I can't disclose how I advise him.
大臣对政策负责 好 我们会问大臣
The Minister's responsible forpolicy. We'll ask the Minister.
文具的事怎么说呢?
What about stationery savings?
那会使基层职员掌握大笔公♥款♥
Itwould've meant Government patronage on junior staff.
大笔公♥款♥?
"Considerable Government patronage"?
一包回形针的钱?
Buying a packet of paperclips?
国家政策要求对公♥款♥使用人数
It's Government policy to exercise strict control
实施严格控制 相信您也理解
overwho can spend its money.
谁要用回形针 谁自己去买♥♥ 这是常理
It's common sense to let people buy theirown paperclips.
政♥府♥政策和常理无关
Government policy is nothing to do with common sense.
你不觉得政策应该改改吗?
Don't you think it's time the policy was changed?
嗯 汉弗莱爵士?
Well, Sir Humphrey?
我无权评论国家政策 问大臣吧
I can't comment on Government policy. Ask the Minister.
大臣建议我们问你
The Ministeradvises us to ask you.
我建议你们问大臣
I'm advising you to ask the Minister.
要绕到几时啊? 你说完事就完事
When does this end? As soon as you like.
好 说说屋顶花♥园♥吧
Let's come to the roof garden.
好 很荣幸
Yes, with pleasure.
它隶属于一系列屋顶隔热装置
This was part of a wide variety of roof insulation schemes,
这是政♥府♥的节能实验
which the Governmentwas testing in fuel economy.
花了75000磅
But ?5,000
本打算用卖♥♥花卉蔬菜的钱抵销成本的
Itwas thought the sale of vegetable might offset the cost.
结果呢?
And did it?
不能抵消 那干吗还留着它?
No. Then why not abandon the garden?
造也造好了 正好隔热用 下不为例
It's there now insulating the roof. we aren't building any more
但已经浪费了75000磅
But you've wasted ?5,000
政策要求尝试一切节能手段啊
All proposals were tested forfuel saving.