查理驾到（2019）

"Honey, do you think I should get a crown transplant?"
天
Oh, man.
我们把加布带走吧
Let's get Gab out of here.
加布
Gabs!
-加布莉艾拉 -加布
- Gabriella! - Gabs!
加布莉艾拉
Gabriella!
萨拉 看
Sara, look.
加布
Gabs!
我的天
Oh, my God.
- 天 天啊 -冷静
Oh, my God, oh, my God, oh, my God. - Calm down.
这不代表任何事
It doesn't mean anything, okay?
只能说明她丢失了她的假发
It just means that she lost her hair
还有手♥机♥ 仅此而已 好吗
and she lost her phone, that's it. Okay?
-我真是个糟糕的妈妈 -你不是的
- I'm a terrible mother. - You're not.
我是个糟糕的妈妈
I'm a terrible mother.
我到处跑 而我的孩子就和这些人在一起
I've been running around while my kid is here with these people.
你不是个糟糕的妈妈 好吗
You're not a terrible mother, okay?
你是个事情特别多的
You're a great mum that's got
伟大妈妈 深呼吸
a lot of shit on her plate, so just breathe.
好吗 她之前应该在这 然后手♥机♥丢了
Okay? I think she was here. I think she lost her phone.
-她会来找你 -嗯
- I think she will be looking for you. - Yeah?
-是的 -是吗
- Yeah. - Yeah?
她应该会去一个
And I think she'll go to a place
你会去的地方 也就是
that she knows you are gonna be at, which is...
-我的秘密演出 -是的 来吧
- My secret gig. - Yes! Come on.
嗯 她看着像安妮
Yeah, yeah, she looks like Annie.
她现在可能脸朝下浮在湖里
She is probably face-down in a lake somewhere
或者在朝眼球注射东西
or injecting something into her eyeballs.
-肯定没有 -妈
- Course she's not-- - Mom!
-妈 -嘿
- Mom! - Hey!
我的天 加布
Oh, my God, Gabs.
你去哪了 我担心死你了
Where have you been? I was so worried about you.
我找不到亨特 然后手♥机♥丢了
I couldn't find Hunter, and then I lost my phone.
我担心你们不再继续找我
And so I was worried that you guys stopped looking for me.
所以我决定来你的演出
So I decided to come to your gig.
而那两个混♥蛋♥不肯放我进去
And those two assholes wouldn't let me through
因为我没有通行证
'cause I didn't have my pass.
我们永远不会停止寻找你
We'd never stop looking for you.
嗯
Well...
我们来这不是为了我的演出
We didn't come here for my gig.
我们来是因为查理知道你会来这
We came because Charlie knew you would come here.
我知道你会去哪 看吧
I knew exactly where you'd be. See?
我要怎么感谢你
How can I thank you?
你可以 用我的名字为你下张专辑取名
Er, you can, er... name your next album after me.
叫《我爱查理》
Just call it I Love Charlie.
你太棒了
You're amazing.
我知道
I know.
你不是有演出吗
Don't you have a gig to do?
看你打碟
I mean, seeing you smash it
是我同意来这的唯一原因
was the only reason I agreed to come, so...
我也是
Yeah, me too.
还有
Also...
我得去处理那事
I have to deal with that.
好
Okay.
别问
Don't even ask.
-加油 -去吧 去吧
- Kill it. - Whoo! Come on! Come on! Come on!
放开表演
Go for it.
抱歉
Sorry.
-加油 -加油
- Whoo! Come on! -Whoo! Come on!
你让她抓狂 你疯了吗
You made her nuts. Are you crazy?
哥们 放他进来
Hey, mate, let him in.
-别放他进来 -笨蛋
- No, don't let him in. - Plonker.
萨拉·凯恩
Sara Caine!
艾丝翠德 我保证 我会穿最紧的紧身裤
Astrid, I promise you, I will wear the tightest tights.
-查理 -你可以看到鼓起的裆部
- Charlie-- - You will see the bulge.
-我会跳肚皮舞 -算了
- I'll do some belly-da-- - Forget about it.
-无所谓 算了 -拜托
- It doesn't matter. Forget about it. - Come on!
算了
Forget about it.
-嘿 -什么
- Hey! - What?
你怎么不跟我说你上了名人
Why didn't you tell me you were banging some famous chick?
-谢谢 -什么
- Oh! Thank you. - What?
我得去除掉这谣言了
Excuse me while I kill that rumor.
什么谣言 兄弟 你在说什么
What rumor? Mate, what are you talking about?
我看到你和那个女DJ卿卿我我
I saw you out there, gettin' all steamy with the lady DJ.
过来 过来
Come here, man. Come here.
我能明白她为什么喜欢你
I can see why she likes you.
听着 那是我好哥们的老婆
No, listen, that is my best mate's wife.
-我绝不会那么做 -淫乱 我喜欢
- I'd never do that. - Naughty! I like it.
你没听我说
No, man, you're not listening to me.
我绝不会这么做
I would never cross that line.
-你疯了吗 -好吧 但问题是
- Are you nuts? - Okay, fine. But here's the thing.
-什么 -我能建议你这么做吗
- What? - Can I suggest that you do?
我不是说要完全插入
I don't mean full-blown penetration.
用手指也行
Just a finger here or there wouldn't go amiss.
-你在说什么 -性丑闻
- What are you talking about? - A sex scandal.
对伊比沙门票的销♥售♥会很有帮助
It could be very healthy for Ibiza sales.
我的歌♥
My tune!
那是我的歌♥
Yeah, that's my tune!
那是我的歌♥
That's my track!
谢谢
Thank you.
听着 你 我
Listen, man. You, me...
伊比沙岛
Ibiza!
-妹子 嗑药 -嗯嗯
- Girls! Pills! - Yeah, yeah, yeah!
-摩托艇 嗑药 -嗯嗯
- Jetskis, pills! - Yeah, yeah! Yeah, yeah!
-嗯 -好
- Yeah! - All right!
那是我的歌♥ 那是我的歌♥
That's my tune, you know! That's my tune!
你还好吗 还想要点什么吗
You okay, babes? You want anything else?
我想听查理给我讲睡前故事
Only a bedtime story from Charlie.
什么 不 我不会讲睡前故事
What? No. Bedtime story is not really my thing.
我只会节奏和韵律
More beats and rhymes...
跟我讲
Just tell me a story about
你和大卫小时候的事
you and David when you were growing up.
我该去守着火了
Oh-ho! That is my cue to tend the fire.
-是吗 -嗯
- Really? - Yeah.
好吧 你想听什么
Okay, what do you wanna hear?
大卫摔倒
Uh... David falling over?
大卫在姑娘面前丢脸
David embarrassing himself in front of girls?
这种故事很多
I've got loads of those stories.
大卫食物中毒 周围还没有厕所
David getting food poisoning when there was no toilet- -
我希望我爸爸能更像你
I want my dad to be more like you.
不 你不想
No, you don't.
我想 我真的想
I do. I really do.
你想喝点家长果汁吗
Hey, you want some parent juice?
你比大卫更值得喝
You deserve it more than David ever did.
-不用了 -你还好吗
- No, no, I'm all right. Yeah. - Oh. You okay?
嗯
Yeah.
嗯 嗯 我
Yeah, yeah, yeah. I, erm...
我好像把我的墨镜落在酒吧了
I think I left my sunglasses at the bar.
是的
Yeah.
所以我要去拿
So I'm gonna go and get that.
-好吗 -好
- All right? Okay. - Okay.
-好 -晚安
- Okay, - All right, good night.
笨蛋
Dickhead!
丹尼 你还好吗
Oi! Danny. You all right, mate?
听着
Listen. Erm...
伊比沙岛的活还在吗
Is Ibiza still on the table?
操 态度大转变啊
Whoa! Fuck... 180 alert.
你不能对我这么惨的人这么做
You don't do that to someone as fucked as me, please.
-什么变了 -我只是
- What's changed? - I just...
我觉得
Listen, I just think that...
我离开这里会更好