加布好老师

Mr. Iglesias S01E02

Part 3 May 29, 2020, 1:25 p.m.

you'll come to understand that life is full of gray areas.
以防我的学生们遇到困难
In case some of my kids struggle,
我只是说
I'm just saying,
有时候小小的错误可能会导致更大的正确
sometimes a little wrong might lead to a greater right.
我不知道加布
Oh, I don't know, Gabe.
这种想法♥会♥变成滑坡谬误
That kind of thinking can be a slippery slope.
滑坡谬误是一种非形式谬误
使用连串的因果推论却夸大了每个环节的因果强度
而得到不合理的结论
那是我最喜欢的坡
Ah, that's my favorite kind of slope.
天哪这个没放调料的冰山生菜看着真是太棒了
Oh, my God, that iceberg lettuce with no dressing looks awesome!
去你的
F this.
-往旁边挪一挪 -不了谢谢
- Scooch over. - No, thank you.
好吧
Okay.
我不知道丹尼最近是着了什么魔
You know, I don't know what's gotten into Danny lately.
他最近好卿卿我我哦
He's been very lovey-dovey.
他通常不会说这样的话
Oh, he doesn't usually say things like this.
艾比现在是我的私人时间
You know, Abby, this is kind of "Me" Time.
五个茄子表情
Five eggplant emojis.
他肯定是饿了
He must be hungry.
他不饿他渴
He not hungry, he thirsty.
现在他想做一些桃子表情的事
Now he wants to do "Peach emoji stuff."
他们总是这样
They always do.
给他发一个红灯表情
Send him a stoplight emoji.
然后再发三只猫和一个棒棒糖
And then, three cats and a lollipop.
不行他对猫过敏一个笑脸怎么样
No, he's allergic to cats. How about just a happy face?
等一下
Wait a minute,
为什么他给我发来了胸部的照片
why is he sending me pictures of breasts?
艾比把你手♥机♥给我
Uh-oh, Abby, give me your phone.
好吧有人不小心把你添加进了聊天群组
Okay, you've gotten added to a text chain by mistake.
琳赛到底是谁
Who the hell is Lindsay?
琳赛是我在圣经营里认识的朋友
Oh, Lindsay's my friend from Bible camp.
耶稣救主帮帮我吧
Oh, Lord Jesus, help me.
但是她为什么给我发来了她的胸部照片
But why is she sending me pictures of her breasts?
是不是因为她担心自己长了肿块
Do you think she has a lump and she's worried?
艾比你的男人在偷♥情♥
Abby, your man is creeping.
唯一的肿块在他裤子里
The only lump is in his pants.
我的天呀
My gosh.
什么
What?
很抱歉亲爱的不然你以为是什么呢
Oh, I'm sorry, honey, but what did you expect?
世界上只有两种男人
You know, there are only two types of men:
一种是偷♥情♥的一种是还没被抓到在偷♥情♥的
those who cheat, and those who haven't been caught yet.
-天哪我的后背都缩紧了 -因为压力
- Oh, God, my back's locking up. - Oh, that's just stress.
不要对那个傻瓜花太多精力
Do not give that fool all your power.
真是一根巨雕
Wow, that is a big penis.
好了各位该你们做展示了
All right, everyone, it is time for your presentations,
做好准备不要嘟囔
so let's get ready to not mumble!
我快速说一下在你们去走廊排队之前
Hey, real quick, before you head out into the hallway to wait your turn,
最后有一点变动
there's been a last-second change.
给你们打分的会是斯宾塞老师
Um, Ms. Spencer's gonna be grading you.
我同父异母的姜黄色头发姐姐啊
My ginger sister from another mister.
最后一秒的变动永远都是不好的消息
Yo, last-second changes are always bad news.
就像是肯尼迪夫人杰奎琳说
Like when Jackie O said,
"外面天气真好
"Oh, it's such a sunny day out.
我们就别坐防弹车了"
Let's not take the bulletproof car."
放轻松洛伦佐
Relax, Lorenzo.
这个变动其实很好
This is actually a good last-second change.
就好像是把奥斯卡金像奖
Uh, kinda like when they gave
颁给了《月光男孩》而不是《爱乐之城》
the Oscar to Moonlight instead of La La Land.
拜托一个白人拯救了爵士乐
Come on. A white guy saving jazz.
不管怎样要说这所学校里
Anyway, if there's any one person
还有谁比我更友善
at this school who's nicer than me,
那一定是斯宾塞老师
it's Ms. Spencer.
好了早完事早解脱
All right. Let's get this over with.
这就是为什么
And that's why,
为了纪念凯萨·查维斯和的德洛丽丝·韦尔塔
to honor Cesar Chavez and Dolores Huerta,
美国农业工人联合会运动的领导者
the leaders of the United Farm Workers movement,
我还是不会吃葡萄的
I still won't eat grapes.
是的我可以
Sí, se puede.
是的你能做到...
Yes, you can. And...
你做到了
yes, you did.
很好玛莉索
Great job, Marisol.
很有前途
So promising.
我希望不会有男人让你前途黯淡
I hope a man never dims your light.
好吧
Okay.
说到黯淡
Well, speaking of dim lights,
你有没有想过用太阳能电池板
have you ever considered solar panels?
我租了个两居室这对我来说太大了
I rent a two bedroom. That's far too big for me now.
分享太多了好吧
Overshare. All right.
好吧我要走了
All right, well, I'm outta here.
斯宾塞老师下学期见
Um, Ms. Spencer, see you in the fall.
伊格莱西亚斯老师免下车餐馆见
Mr. Iglesias, see you at the drive-through.
苏珊·B·安东尼中的B代表布劳内尔
The B in Susan B. Anthony stands for "Brownell,"
但其实应该是指"领袖"
but it should stand for "Boss."
苏珊·B·安东尼美国女权运动先驱
做得好
Good job.
总之单枪匹马的枪手
So, in conclusion, lone gunman?
谁信啊
You tell me.
谁信啊
You. Tell. Me!
指肯尼迪暗♥杀♥是团伙预谋
太疯狂了
Dude, it was crazy.
因为卡斯特将军想的是"小意思"
'Cause Custer was all like, "We got this,"
坐牛首领想的是"来啊哥们"
and Sitting Bull was like, "Go ahead, bro".
"我就坐在这等你呢"
"I'm literally sitting here waiting for you."
你惹恼了牛你就会被牛顶
But you mess with the bull, you're gonna get the horns.
他们确实惹恼了牛也确实被牛顶了
And they did mess with the Bull, and they did get the horns.
再见了长滩
Goodnight, Long Beach!
你听懂了吗
See what he did there?
他选了历史内容但是用流行语解释
He took historical content, and he put it into a modern language.
天衣无缝
You are clutch, brah.
惺惺相惜啊
Game recognizes game.
怎么了艾比你没事吧
What's the matter, Abby? You okay?
我的背疼死了
My back is killing me.
还有多少学生
How many more kids are there?
就剩下麦奇了他是最好的我跟你说
Uh, just Mikey. He's my closer. Let me just tell you right now,
这个孩子比玛丽·托德还了解林肯
this kid knows more about Abraham Lincoln than Mary Todd.
玛丽·托德是林肯的老婆
That's who Lincoln was married to.
我知道加布我是历史老师
I know, Gabe, I'm a history teacher.
我相信林肯一家知道了肯定很高兴
And I'm sure the Lincolns were very happy.
我想到的可不是这个词
Not the word that comes to mind.
希望你喜欢前面的热身
Hope you enjoyed the warm-up acts
因为重头戏现在来了
because the headliner is here.
艾比艾比七局伸展操结束了来吧
Hey, Abby? Abby, seventh-inning stretch is over. Come on.
好吧麦奇开始吧
All right, Mikey, let's do this.
开始什么
Do what?
你的口头报告
Your oral report.
你没事吧
You okay, buddy?
她刚刚做了热辣女教师那套
She just did the whole sexy teacher thing
甩头发脱眼镜还有所有的动作
with her hair, and glasses, and everything.
好集中精神想想奖励
Okay. Focus, okay? Eyes on the prize.
不...不是...不是那个奖励
Not...Not...Not that prize.
你能行的灯光摄影知识去吧
Look, you got this. Lights, camera, knowledge, go.
亚伯拉罕·林肯一生中遭遇了很多不幸
Abraham Lincoln suffered a lot of loss in his life.
他的儿子威利...死在了白宫
His son Willy died... ...in the White House...
林...林肯公园的主唱也死了
The-- The lead singer of Linkin Park also died.
马修·麦康纳开的是林肯
Matthew McConaughey, that's who drives a Lincoln.
暂停暂停过来
Time out. Time out. Come on.
过来老弟老弟放松点
Come on. Dude, dude. Dude. Relax, okay?
你要把脑子里装的所有知识
You need to take everything
从口中表达出来
that's up here and make it come out here.
好吗听着
Okay? And listen.
别想着下面发生的事
Forget about what's happening down here.
小木屋
Log cabin.