洛维航线
LA to Vegas
第一季
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洛维航线
LA to Vegas S01E03
Part 3
June 4, 2020, 4:13 p.m.
我明天要给24个小朋友办派对
I'm holding a party tomorrow for 24 children.
我没有场地 我需要帮忙
I've got nowhere to throw it. I need help.
我知道打给你很奇怪
I know it's weird I'm calling you.
你是我在拉斯维加斯唯一认识的人了
You're the only person I know in Las Vegas.
不是唯一一个
Well, not the only person.
罗妮说你需要人帮忙开趴
Ronnie says you need help throwing party
讨好你儿子
to buy your son's love.
-罗妮打给你了 -没错
- Ronnie called you? - Yeah.
正好阿提姆是个大帮手 上车 车上有糖
And Artem is big helper. Hop in. I have candy.
不是吧 你要我上车 搭你的车
Oh, no. You want me to get in this? With you?
别担心 这都不是我的车
Yeah, don't worry, it's not even my van.
假设我们真的考虑
Let's just say, for a minute, we actually considered
捏造事实 投诉史蒂夫机长
lodging a fake complaint against Captain Steve.
要投诉什么才有效呢
What could we possibly say that would make a difference?
我们就说他捏我翘臀
We'll just say he grabbed my ass.
他要捏也是捏我的
If he's grabbing anybody's ass, it's mine.
拜托 你有看到你的臀吗
Please. Have you seen your ass?
我反正没看到
Because I haven't.
-他又不搞基 -我的美跨越性别
- He's not even gay. - I transcend sexuality.
你知道我掰弯多少机长吗
Do you know how many pilots I've turned?
-少来 有谁 -说了你会震惊
- Shut up. Like who? - You'd be surprised.
不是只有餐车可以"两边通吃"
The drink carts aren't the only things that go both ways.
抱歉打扰
Sorry to interrupt,
但你们俩不是该干活吗
but don't you think you guys should be working?
周六下午赌城飞洛杉矶的航♥班♥就是这样
It's the Saturday afternoon flight from Vegas to L.A.
-没什么工作好做 -嗯
- There's nothing to do. - Yeah.
瞧 就是这种态度
See, it's that attitude that makes you both
让你们俩如此失败
such remarkable failures.
我要求你们在机上全程保持最佳状态
I demand excellence every moment you're on this plane.
没错 但史蒂夫 这真的...
Right, but, Steve, there's literally...
抱歉 直呼其名了吗
Sorry. "Steve"?
试试"机长"或"先生"吧
Try "Captain," or "Sir."
不知道你们这么差劲是怎么混过来的 但是
I don't know how you got away with this garbage before, but...
今后行不通了
it ends now.
你敢相信吗
Can you believe that?
他当他自己是谁
Who the hell does he think he is?
我要走进驾驶舱
I'm gonna march right into that cockpit
让他抓我翘臀
and make him grab my ass.
摇篮
这地方真的很棒
This place is really impressive.
生意很好啊 法尔里
Yeah, business is good, eh, Farley?
是啊 自从《怪奇物语》那小孩用滑板车
Yeah, man, things have blown up for us, ever since
揭露了狗仔之后 我们生意就火爆了
that Stranger Things kid nailed a paparazzo with his scooter.
跟我来
Follow me.
明天上午 二十人
So you need something for tomorrow morning, 20 heads.
妹子和棍子几比几
What's the chick-to-stick raish?
-不好意思 你说... -男女比例
- I'm so sorry, the...? - Girl to guy. Girl to guy ratio.
我们建议男女一比三
We like to keep it three to one.
我想差不多各半
I-I think it's about even.
你很幸运有阿提姆这个朋友
You're lucky Artem's a friend.
明天肯定会嗨上天
So, tomorrow is going to be lit!
埃及节奏达人主持
Egypt Keys-Beatz is hosting.
只提供整瓶酒水 来十个大瓶装吧
Bottle service only. Let's say, uh, ten of the magnums?
我们还推荐外面彩球坑旁边的桌位
Also, you're gonna want the table out by the ball pit.
那里最刺♥激♥了
That's where it all goes down.
那是什么 贵宾服务吗
What is that? VIP?
花生过敏 算上酒水 桌位
Peanut allergy. So, with the bottles, the table,
当然还有派对礼品
and of course the party favors...
他为什么眨眼 我们确实需要礼品
Why is he winking? We really do need party favors.
总价是八千美金
Your total comes out to $8,000.
-什么 -价钱很合理
- What? - That is good price.
不不不 我根本付不起
No, no, no, no. There's no way I can afford that.
我希望能给儿子特殊的纪念 但我预算有限
Look, I want this to be special for my son, but I'm on a budget.
四百块钱的服务怎么样
What can I get for $400?
我花四百块回到了原地
I paid $400 to get back to exactly where I started.
欢迎来到拉斯维加斯
Welcome to Las Vegas!
我们必须对史蒂夫机长有点行动了
We have to do something about Captain Steve.
先问一下 我们俩谁更适合被性骚扰
But first, which one of us is more sexually harass-able?
回答之前考虑一下我的卧室专用小眼神
Before you answer, consider my bedroom eyes.
放松 别把隐形眼镜挤碎了
Relax. Don't pop a contact.
如果史蒂夫接手这条航线
Steve is going to make our lives hell
就会让我们生不如死 必须阻止他
if he takes over this route. We have to stop him.
我们想着去诋毁他
We're thinking smear campaign.
我们对偷窃狂凯西用过
Same thing we did with Klepto-Kathy,
不过那次可能下手太早了
although we may have jumped the gun on that one.
就因为我找到了手链
Well, just because we found my bracelet
不代表她不想偷
doesn't mean she didn't want to steal it.
慢着
Let's slow down here.
我们不能就这么玷污史蒂夫的名誉
We can't just go around besmirching Steve's reputation.
什么 这是你的主意 怎么现在又反悔了
What? This was your idea. Where is this coming from?
你什么时候学会了"玷污"这个词
And when did you learn "Besmirch"?
我只是想说 我们应该在攻击他之前
All I'm saying, we should consider our options
考虑所有的选择
before crucifying him.
公♥司♥说如果史蒂夫飞戴夫的航线
Corporate said Dave could have Steve's route
-戴夫就能飞史蒂夫的航线 -靠 艾伦
- if Steve took Dave's route. - Damn it, Alan.
-什么 -好吧
- What? - Alright.
我给上层打电♥话♥问他们
I called corporate to ask, hypothetically,
假设史蒂夫机长飞洛维航线
if Captain Steve took L.A. To Vegas,
我能不能去飞国际线 他们同意了
could I take international, and they were on board.
你的工作悬于一线的时候需要我们的帮助
So when it was your job on the line, you needed our help,
但现在我们有麻烦了
but now that it's ours,
-你却不在乎 -你们不明白吗
- you don't care. - Don't you understand?
国际航线对我来说是绝好的机会
This international route would be huge for me.
我需要这份工作 看看我
I need this. Just look at me.
看看我的手腕
Look at my wrist.
就因为你没有救出某个被压在大衣橱下的人
We're supposed to be cool with you screwing us,
-我们就能原谅你搞我们吗 -不
- just because you couldn't help some guy under an armoire? - No.
你们应该原谅我
You should be cool with it
因为被压在大衣橱下的人是我
because I was the guy under the armoire.
我救不了我自己
I was the one I couldn't help.
-什么 -你家有大衣橱
- What? - You own an armoire?
我买♥♥的 把它搬回家的时候
I bought it. And I was moving it back
它倒下来压在我身上了
to my place when it tipped over on me.
我被困在下面几个小时
I was trapped underneath of it for hours.
几小时 我从那个克雷格列表变♥态♥那里取货
Hours. When I picked it up from that Craigslist perv,
他还说
he even said to me,
"没人帮你搬吗"
"Don't you have someone to help you move this?"
没有
But I didn't.
事实上我的生活中连一个
Because the truth is I have no one in my life
帮我搬华丽古典家具的人都没有
to help me move a gorgeous piece of antique furniture.
我是不是有点自私
So am I being a little selfish?
是的
Yes.
但是作为一个独自搬大衣橱的人
But when you're a guy stuck moving armoires alone...
我有资格自私
you get to be selfish.
大衣橱是啥
What's a armoire?
我们来这儿干什么
What are we doing here?
还没找到开派对的地方呢
We still haven't found a place for the party.
会找到的
We'll find place.
先搞定娱乐项目
For now, we focus on entertainment.
葡萄柚绅士夜♥总♥会♥
-你觉得应该来这里找娱乐项目吗 -没错
- You think this is the place for the entertainment? - Yeah.
好吧
Ok, okay.
有朋友过来太好了
It's so fun when my friends come by.
我的家人几乎从不来工作的地方看我
My family almost never comes to visit me at work.
不好意思 你是说"几乎从不"吗
I'm sorry, did you say "Almost never"?
别担心 你们来对地方了
And don't worry, you came to the right place.
这里有很多有才华的姑娘
We have so many talented ladies
想去帮你们办派对
who want to help with this party.
姑娘们
Girls?
-接下来上场的是 -这是斯塔茜
- Next to the stage... - This is Staci.
她用避孕套做的气球动物特别棒
She makes awesome balloon animals out of condoms.
洛维航线
LA to Vegas
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