绑定

梅拉尼娅·特朗普
Melania Trump.
你好
Hello.
梅尔文
Hey, Melvin.
漫漫长夜啊
Long night?
我知道我们吵架了 但是
I know we had a fight, but--
绑定
第一季 第六集
她不来了 是吗
She's not coming, is she?
把这个穿上
Put this on.
我想摔跤
I wanna wrestle.
好吧 我们
Okay, how about we...
要不改天等女主人回来的吧
just do a rain check and wait until Mistress May arrives,
因为我是
because, I mean, I'm like, you know,
男生 你想要一只小雌企鹅
a boy and you probably want a girl penguin--
我只想要企鹅 穿上
I want a penguin. Put it on.
好吧
Okay.
-先套头 -好
- From the bottom, up. - Okay, yeah.
-好的 -头先进
- Sure. - Head first.
好
Okay.
好了
There you go.
那是翅膀
That's in the wing.
把头伸到 对
You put your head through the... yeah.
小心喙
Careful of the beak.
天啊
Oh, boy.
好了
Yeah, and now just...
你想怎么摔
Okay, so, what kind of wrestling are you into?
企鹅摔跤
Penguin wrestling.
-当然 -把手放我肩上
- Of course. - Put your hands on my shoulders.
用我真正的手 还是鳍
Okay. Should I use my actual hands, or like, my flippers or--
我们在摔跤了
Okay! We are wrestling.
好吧
Okay.
你和梅主人也摔跤吗
You do this with Mistress May?
不 我只是撸管的时候看着她
No. I was just gonna watch her
穿着企鹅服摇摇晃晃地走来走去
waddle around in the suit while I jerked off.
我们也可以啊
Oh, uh, we could still do that.
你为什么这么喜欢企鹅
Um, well, what do you like about penguins so much?
你看过《帝企鹅日记》吗
Have you ever seen March of the Penguins?
它们不是在里面跳都市舞蹈吗
Isn't that the one where they, like, urban dance?
-那是《快乐脚》 -抱歉
- That's Happy Feet. - Oh, sorry.
对不起 我看企鹅的时候
Okay, I'm sorry. Look, I've never been more aroused...
特别性奋 好吗
than when I look at penguins, okay?
它们摇摇晃晃的样子
The way they waddle.
游泳的样子
The way they swim.
打架的样子
The way they fight.
他们是群小野兽
They're little fucking beasts.
他们不也是终生为伴吗
Don't they also, like, mate for life?
这是常见的误解
That's a common misconception.
谢谢科普
Good to know.
好吗
All right?
给我一个
Give me one little...
企鹅之吻 这对我
penguin kiss, and it would mean...
很重要 就一个
so much to me. Just one.
-什么 不不不 -喙对喙
- What? No, no, no, no! - One little tiny beak-to-beak.
不 我说了不要
No! No means no!
没有企鹅接吻
No penguin kisses!
没有爱斯基摩人接吻 没有蝶吻
No Eskimo kisses! No butterfly kisses!
你这个企鹅可以滚回家了
You can march your penguin ass home!
今天结束了
We're done for the day.
把钱放前台
Just leave your money with reception,
我离开的时候 别看着我
and don't watch me while I walk away.
遵命 卡特主人
Yes, Master Carter.
你叫我什么
What did you call me?
卡特主人
Master Carter.
先别拉
Don't shit yet.
抱歉
Sorry.
那我憋着
Uh, I will hold it.
我是
I'm...
施虐狂
a dominatrix.
怪不得你穿靴子呢
That would explain the boots.
你觉得怎么样
So how do you feel about that?
靴子很漂亮
Uh, the boots? They're nice boots.
不
No, uh...
我是指施虐狂
About me being a dominatrix.
不知道
I don't know.
可以吗
Is that okay?
这就是我
This is me.
我的其中一部分
Well, part of me.
你就像参加葬礼的神奇女侠
Yeah, you look like Wonder Woman at a funeral.
听着
Look...
我那晚
I had a really...
真的很开心
nice time the other night,
尽管我不想让自己开心
in spite of my best effort not to.
所以
So...
我也说不好 如果你想
I don't know, if you want
了解我的工作或是干这行的原因
to know more about what I do or why I do it,
又或者你只是想在弹珠台上完败给我
or if you just want to let me annihilate you in pinball,
随便你
I'm gonna leave that up to you.
你可以安静地拉屎了
I'm gonna let you shit in peace now.
我已经拉了
I already did.
是吗
You did?
又不是只有你能悄摸地干活
You're not the only one who can do things on the down low.
课堂上见
I'll see you in class.
你要穿那个上课吗
You're gonna wear that?
不 但我是认真的
I mean, no, but I'm fucking serious.
你没问题的
You're gonna be fine.
嗯 我只是希望蒂芙能来
Yeah, I... I just wish Tiff were here.
我要不嗑点大♥麻♥吧
Shouldn't I just get baked or something?
我没这么逊吧
Or am I better than that?
我就是这么逊
I'm not better than that, no.
谢谢你能来
Thanks for coming.
显然我是你唯一的粉丝
I'm your only fan, apparently.
尿他们一脸吧 小子
Piss all over 'em, kiddo.
工作上认识的朋友
Just a friend from work.
是吗
Oh, yeah?
哪怕男人一辈子只来一次月经
If a man had his period once in a lifetime,
卫生棉条就会免费
tampons would be free,
还可以在酒窖里堕胎
and you could get an abortion at the bodega.
你们就 我是认...
You'd literally... I'm s...
你就躺在那 然后说
You'd literally be laying there, being like,
在我账上加一盒杏仁奶
"Can you also put a carton of almond milk
还有几根烟吧
and some cigarettes on my tab?"
谢谢各位 我本月的演出到此结束了
Thank you. Okay, you guys, that's my time... of the month.
墨菲 你好
Murphy! Hello.
好吧 不抱了
All right, no hugging there.
给墨菲掌声鼓励 她很逗吧
Give it up for Murphy. Isn't she funny?
好了 掌声欢迎下一位喜剧演员
All right, let's give it up for your next comic,
卡特
uh, Carter.
没错
Uh, that's it.
我以为是雪儿呢 来吧 卡特
It's like a Cher is gonna be next. Come on, Carter!
我以为是你呢
I thought you were next.
是我
I am.
好了 大家都坐好
All right, all right, everybody settle down.
教授
Professor.
有人要见你
I've got some people here to see you.
你还记得凯特吧
You remember Kate, right?
你应该也认识我们的主管
And maybe you know our administrators,
卡特赖特女士和萨姆斯先生吧
Mrs. Cartwright and Mr. Sames?
他们很想和你聊聊
They would love to have a chat with you.
我们可爱的明星教授
Our lovely star professor
没有找到合适的界限
here didn't have the proper boundaries,
所以他今天不能上课了
so he's dismissed from class for the day.