直言无讳（2015）

直言不讳
第二季 第七集
跟着我说
Say these words after me.
我忏悔我的罪
I despair of my sins.
我忏悔我的罪
I despair of my sins.
万善的上帝啊
O God of all goodness...
-万善的... -我无意冒犯祢
- O God... - How could I ever have offended thee?
上帝啊
... of all goodness.
妈妈 快点
Mom, please.
我渴死了
I'm thirsty.
你真的想给孩子喝这个吗
Is this what you want for your children?
你邻居厕所里的水
Water from your neighbor's toilet?
恶心
Yuck.
投票反对68号♥提案
Vote against proposition 68.
本广♥告♥由想喝净水的人资助
Paid for by people for clean water.
好了
All right.
准备再来一发吗 宝贝
Are you ready for round 2.5, babe?
好
Okay.
你每次冲完澡都会拿毛巾包头吗
Do you always wear a towel around your head after a shower?
对啊 所有男人都这样 怎么了
Of course. All men do. Why?
没事
Nothing.
你这么问是觉得我冲澡次数太多了吗
Hey, did you ask that because you think I shower too much?
我不这么觉得 我...可能是太多了吧
I don't think I do. I-- I don't know, maybe I do.
-鲁迪医生 -我老实跟你说吧
- Dr. Rudy, I-- - I'm gonna be frank with you.
从一开始你就该了解我
You should know who I am right from the start.
我得保持我的肛♥门♥清洁
I need to keep my anus very clean.
这是我的工作带来的条件反射
It's a neurosis brought on by my job.
但千万别多想
But please don't judge me.
我真的很喜欢你
I'm just really, really into you.
谢谢
Oh, thank you.
西莉亚 你人呢
Celia, where are you?
我给你发了一晚上短♥信♥
I've been texting all night.
我...我不想你一个人带着把枪
I don't-- I don't like you being alone with a gun
而且还不知道怎么用
and not knowing how to use it.
你是不是遇到氨气泄露了
Or maybe there's an ammonia gas leak.
好多人遇到了都不知道自己怎么死的
Lots of people die like that and never realize it.
总之 我好像心灵感应到你
Anyway, it's like you're sending me
在寻求我的帮助
telepathic cries for help.
所以我要来找你了
So I'm gonna come over.
因为我担心你
'Cause I'm worried.
我知道你不爽伊芙琳
And I know you're upset about Evelyn,
可我...我就是爱你
But I-- I can't stop loving you.
太爽了 哈里
This feels so good, Harry.
对了 刚想起来
Oh, I just remembered.
我又做了个有奥逊·威尔斯的噩梦
I had another disturbing Orson Welles dream.
长官 我倒更希望你的潜意识能够
I liked it better, sir, when your subconscious
多放放伯特·兰卡斯特的电影
played Burt Lancaster films.
我同意
I agree.
这次我梦到奥逊年轻的时候
In this dream, Orson was young
他还杀了人
and he was a murderer.
可...可能是想到我要去见
Maybe-- maybe I'm feeling anxious
那个私♥家♥侦♥探♥就紧张的缘故吧 哈里
about going to see this private detective, Harry.
今晚还有薇薇安和莫比的婚礼晚宴彩排呢
There's also Vivian and Moby's rehearsal dinner tonight, sir.
估计是这个的缘故
Perhaps that's troubling you.
我靠 我都忘了 你怎么不提醒我
Oh, shit, I forgot. Why didn't you remind me?
我不是刚提醒了
I just did, sir.
有人吗 有人吗
Hello. Hello?
雷夫 真的是雷夫
Rafe? Rafe, my boy!
你们这是在搞什么
What the hell is this?
我在帮你把涂抹金缕梅液
I'm giving your father a witch hazel treatment.
促进血液循环 增加生活情趣
It's good for circulation and joie de vivre.
是挺有用的
And it works.
很高兴见到你 不过你来我这干什么
It's good to see you, son. But what are you doing here?
来打拳击吗 怎么不打个电♥话♥
You got a fight? Why didn't you call?
不不不 我是来参加薇薇安的婚礼的
No, no, no, no, no. I'm down for Vivian's wedding.
我还以为你知道我要来的呢
I figured you knew I was coming.
从来没有人告诉过我
Oh, nobody tells me anything around here.
薇薇安邀请了你
Vivian invited you?
对啊 那肯定
Yeah, of course she did.
这么多后妈当中 我最喜欢她了
Of all my stepmoms, she's my favorite.
-行吧 -还要金缕梅液吗 长官
- Right. - More witch hazel, sir?
还是该帮你穿衣服了
Or shall we get you dressed?
现在八点 阿博加斯特那边九点可以
It's 8:00 A.M. and Arbogast opens at 9:00.
那帮我穿衣服吧 哈里
Oh, let's get dressed, Harry.
阿博加斯特是什么
What's an Arbogast?
某个为了某邪恶水源财团的利益想要
A private dick who's trying to sully your father's reputation
玷污你♥爸♥名声的混♥蛋♥私♥家♥侦♥探♥
on behalf of a treacherous water conglomerate.
你这个阿博加斯特解释得好 哈里
That is an excellent definition of an Arbogast, Harry.
这套是80年代中期丹·拉瑟装扮
Now, we have your mid-'80s Dan Rather look
这套是70年代末期赛日·甘斯布装扮
or your late-'70s Serge Gainsbourg.
肯定穿甘斯布那套啊 哈里
Oh, Gainsbourg, definitely, Harry.
好嘞 长官
Bien sûr, major.
让我进去吧 求你了
Please let me come in? Please.
为什么 既然你还想找其他女人
Why? If you want to be with other women,
就说明你不想和我继续下去了
that means that you don't want to be with me.
我不是解释了吗 我想和你继续下去
We've been over this. I do want to be with you.
可我不知道自己能不能接受一夫一妻
I just don't know if I'm capable of monogamy.
没人能 可你总得尽力试啊
Nobody is, but you have to try.
我试了啊 可能我比较像大黄蜂
I have tried, but maybe I'm too much like a bumblebee
得要把我的刺插遍所有美丽的花
and I just need to dip my stinger in all the beautiful flowers.
天啊 你害得我都想自残了
Oh, God. You make me want to hurt myself.
这儿有好多布洛芬
There's a lot of motrin in here
还有个生锈的女士打火机
And a rusty lady's bic.
什么 别别别 求你千万别自残
What? No, no, don't hurt yourself, please.
对不起我说错话了 对不起我伤害了你
I-I'm sorry I said anything. I'm sorry I hurt you.
我是个傻♥逼♥ 就该马上被枪毙
I'm an idiot and should be shot immediately.
我自己决定了
I've come to an executive decision.
如果你想找其他女人 那我也得参与
If you want to be with other women, then I need to be involved.
我不想失去你
I don't want to lose you.
参与
Involved?
总算又能看到你的头顶了 儿子
It's good to see the top of your head, son.
谢谢你 沃尔特
Thank you, Walter.
我自己也不敢相信 我居然有点想你
Yeah, I can hardly believe it, but I've missed you.
你和那些拳击赛搞黑幕的关系怎么样
How are your relations with those fight fixers?
都买♥♥通了吗
Have you worked things out?
都贿赂安排妥当了
Oh, yeah, I squared things.
我在萨克拉门托打了一场
I threw a fight in Sacramento.
不过还有血红片片证明我打过比赛了
Still got the scarlet loaves to prove it.
血红面包片
Scarlet loaves of bread?
我猜他指的是蹲坑时的血吧 长官
I believe he's referring to blood in his stool, sir.
就像是用异教♥徒♥的血做成的无酵饼
Like matzo made with the blood of gentiles.
听起来挺严重的 去看过医生了吗
That sounds serious. Have you been to a doctor?
没有 你知道我讨厌医生的
No, I hate doctors. You know that.
-我跟你一起去呢 -握着我的手吗
- What if I came with you? - What, and hold my hand?
最近我们节目结识了一名优秀的医生
Recently we had a very good doctor on the show.
就这么点内出血影响不了我
Yeah, a little internal bleeding never bothered me.
挺爽的
That was great.
不过抱歉 我太快了
But sorry it was so fast.
挺好的 别多想
No, it was lovely. Don't worry.
每当我做♥爱♥
You know, whenever I make love,
然后早泄了
I.E., have premature ejaculation,
我就会想到《银翼杀手》里
I like to think of that speech from Blade Runner
泰瑞尔对鲁特格尔·哈尔说的那段话
that tyrell gives to Rutger Hauer.
什么话
What speech?
"绽放两倍耀眼光芒 寿命就会衰减一半
"The light that burns twice as bright burns half as long,
你已经燃烧得特别耀眼了 罗伊"
And you have burned so very, very brightly, Roy."
所以我做♥爱♥也是这样
So that's how I make love.
时间不长 但很耀眼
Doesn't last long, but burns bright.
西莉亚 我就知道
Celia, I knew it.
-天啊天啊 -我闻到氨气了 别睡
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God. - I smell ammonia. Don't fall asleep.
鲁迪医生