爆笑女警（2016）

这是一项被称为电竞的运动
It's called "eSports," and it's real.
职业电竞选手们将在人山人海的体育馆里
Professional video gamers going head-to-head
进行强强对碰
as a stadium full of people watch.
迎面走来的是
Oh, and here he comes,
航行任务的卫冕冠军
the defending "Voyage Quest" champion...
骨魔666
BoneDevil666.
看能不能采访一下他 魔先生 魔先生
Let's see if we can get a word. Mr. Devil! Mr. Devil!
可以跟你聊几句吗
Can I get two words from you?
可以
Uh, sure. Yes.
假如今天能够获胜
A win for you today would bring your team
你们将距离在平壤举办的总决赛
one step closer to the world championships
仅有一步之遥
in Pyongyang.
你压力大吗
Are you feeling the pressure?
日出东方 唯骨不败
The Big Bone dominates "Voyage Quest."
千秋万载 一统电竞
That's an undisputed fact.
那些不自量力的人
And anyone who gets in his way
必将倒在
is gonna be looking at the business end
骨大大的神功之下
of a Complainium Broadsword.
- 采访结束 - 什么鬼
- No more questions. - What?
能给我签个名吗
Hey, hey, hey. Can I get your autograph?
没问题
Oh, yeah, sure.
签给谁的
Who should I, uh, make it out to?
我的天啊
Oh, my God!
骨魔666刚刚被无情地袭击了
BoneDevil666 has just been ruthlessly attacked!
这是为毛啊
Why? Why? Why? Why?
爆笑女警 第四季 第03集
骨魔666是一名二十二岁的职业电竞者
BoneDevil666 is the nom de guerre
保罗·骨森的艺名
of 22-year-old professional gamer Paul Boneson.
不好意思 墨菲 高级会议
Sorry, Murphy. Above your pay grade.
来吧 霍夫曼
Come on, Hoffman!
骨森是火花侠职业电竞团队的一员
Boneson plays a game called "Voyage Quest"
他的电竞项目是航行任务
for a professional gaming team known as SharkSpark.
你们现在看到的袭击
The attack, which you're seeing now,
使他的手指
has taken his fingers out of the running
无缘世界冠军
for the world championships.
长官 我以为我们受理的是
Sir, I thought we were taking cases
法律管辖范围以外的案子
outside of law enforcement,
比如说国际间谍活动及闹鬼的火车
like international espionage and haunted trains?
得了吧 老妈 你莫名其妙的质疑
Damn it, Mom. Your unique brand of skepticism
会让团队四分五裂的
is gonna tear this team apart!
幸运的是 我预料到了翠贝卡的愤世嫉俗
Fortunately, I anticipated Tribeca's rock-hard cynicism.
因此 案情简报将由
Therefore, this briefing will be given
特别行动小组的主管
by the director of the Special Division Force himself...
乔·佩里副总统负责
Vice President Joe Perry.
骨魔666是一名二十二岁的电竞选手
BoneDevil666 is the nom de guerre
保罗的艺名
of a 22-year-old gamer named Paul...
抱歉 乔 这段我说过了
Sorry, Joe. I-I covered that.
你上来晚了
You were further down the road than I thought.
翠贝卡刚才又发作了吗
Did Tribeca show her unique brand of skepticism?
如你所料
That's exactly where we are.
电竞行业
The video gaming industry
对美国经济的促进
brings more money into the U.S. economy
比导弹 石油 和咖啡杯套加起来还要多
than missiles, oil, and coffee-cup sleeves combined.
如果有外国势力要扰乱这个行业
If a foreign entity wants to disrupt that industry,
我们要对此有所了解
we wanna know about it,
并且希望能够阻止它
and ideally, we wanna stop it.
你知道我刚刚听到的是什么吗
You know what I just heard you say?
"我要把你关进监狱二十年"
"I'm sending you to prison for 20 years."
我的天啊 你还耿耿于怀啊
Oh, my God. Are you still on that?
都已经二十年了
It's been like 20 years.
你把我关进监狱 还把钥匙扔掉了
You locked me up and threw away the key!
我又不知道只有一把钥匙
I didn't know that was the only copy!
翠贝卡 当时情况不一样
Look, Tribeca, that was a different time.
那时流行把人们关进监狱
Back then, putting people in jail was all the rage,
我猜我当时只是随大流
and I guess I just jumped on the bandwagon.
我的心里只有国家的安危
All I care about is the safety of this nation.
这就是我拉你入伙的原因
That's why I brought you on board,
因为我知道我可以信任你
because I knew I could count on you.
那我可以信任你吗
So, can I... count on you...
一心为国
to care... about the safety... of our nation?
可以
Yes, sir.
很好
All right, then.
骨魔666在一家位于阿肯色州
BoneDevil666 is recovering in a hospital bed
小岩石县的医院就医
in Little Rock, Arkansas.
他是美国电竞队的队长
It's the gaming capital of the United States.
找到袭击他的人及原因
Find out who attacked him and why.
即便你们现在做的一切
And even though everything you're doing
都是合法的 但也务必守口如瓶
will be perfectly legal, don't tell anyone anything,
除非你们关注了每日一笑
unless you follow up with "Just kidding."
所以你没看清楚袭击者的样子
So, you didn't get a look at the guy who attacked you?
我只记得他戴着滑雪面具
I just remember he was wearing a ski mask.
态度放尊重点 混♥蛋♥
Lose the attitude, you little prick.
等下会有点痛
Now, it's gonna be painful,
但我想让你动下手指
but I wanna get your fingers moving.
我做不到
I can't do it.
这些是什么人 他们在干什么
Who are these people? What are they doing here?
我们正在调查
We're trying to get to the bottom
谁袭击了骨森先生
of who attacked Mr. Boneson.
我有一个更好的问题 你是谁
A better question might be, who are you?
还有一个更好的问题
And an even better question might be,
如果妓♥女♥是这个世界上最古老的职业
If prostitution is the oldest profession in the world,
那么谁会是第一个嫖♥娼♥后付钱的人呢
who earned the money to pay for the first prostitute?
我是贝奇·屌♥爆 显而易见
I'm Becky Bunnker, and it's obvious what happened.
某个非爱国人士
Someone, who doesn't stand for the national anthem,
不想让他成为世界冠军
didn't want him to become world champion.
似乎我们的果冻手指先生
Yeah, well, it doesn't seem like Mr. Jelly Fingers over here
并不在乎世界冠军
even cares about the world championships.
这你就大错特错了 航行任务就是他的生命
You couldn't be more wrong. "Voyage Quest" is his life.
我不知道你从哪听来的
I don't know who told you otherwise.
贝奇 我要放弃电竞事业了
Actually, Beck, I'm just done with this whole thing.
我想找一份
I think I'm just gonna get a job
教动物玩电游的工作
teaching animals to play video games.
骨魔 你脑袋进水了吧
You don't know what you're saying, BoneDevil.
我们已经计划好了
We had plans, right?
我们要用你的奖金把庆丰包子铺买♥♥下来
We were gonna buy that Fuddruckers with your winnings.
翠贝卡
Tribeca.
马上 长官
Right away, sir.
最新消息
This just in...
袭击者去小岩石警局自首了
the attacker turned himself in to Little Rock PD.
他现在在警局
He's at the station now.
你不觉得我们应该抢在别人之前
Well, don't you think we should have a word with him
跟他聊一聊吗
before somebody else does?
我还要在这等多久
How much longer do I have to wait here?
我要认罪
I'm trying to confess to a crime!
排号♥去
Take a number.
- 熏牛肉 谢谢 - 来了来了
- Yo, pastrami, please. - Coming up.
我要答案
I want answers.
现在就要
And I want 'em now!
来吧
Just do it.
给我个痛快
Just get it over with.
我们只想知道发生了什么
We just wanna know what happened.
他们会追杀我的
They're gonna come after me, man.
因为你袭击了保罗·骨森 所以他们要杀你
They're gonna kill you because what you did to Paul Boneson?
没错
Yes!
为了让我闭嘴
To keep me quiet!
你认识他们吗
Do you know them?
就是我的团队
It's my team.
火花侠 他们就是我 我就是他们
It's SharkSpark. They're me. I'm them.
为什么火花侠要追杀自己的选手
Why would SharkSpark wanna go after its own players?
都是因为金币 他们只想要金币
It's all about coins, man. All they want is coins.