不好（2022）

但冥冥中有什么东西或是什么人 救了我
but something, or someone, saved me.
也许是守护天使 或是上帝 或是艾伦·里克曼的鬼魂
Maybe it was a guardian angel, or God, or Alan Rick man's ghost,
但我并不认为我相信那些
but I don't think that I believe in any of that.
更有可能是我自己救了自己
More likely, it was me who saved me.
倒不是说我就相信自己
Not that I believe in myself either.
但如果说这一切教会了我什么事
But if all of this has taught me something…
那就是我也许应该自信
…it's that maybe I should.
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我的天
Oh, my God.
这就是我 叹号♥
This is me. Exclamation mark.
我永远不会忘记那天看到的一切
I will never forget what I saw that day. -
我到底看到了什么
What did I see that day?
好吧 炸♥弹♥袭击的幸存者
Okay. Survivor of bombing.
天
Oh, my God.
很好 好主意
That's good. That's a good idea.
你好 -妈
Hello? -Hey, Mom. Hi, Mom.
你好吗 丹妮 -妈 我很好
How are you, Danni? -Hi, Mom. Yeah.
我只是有个小问题 -说来听听
No, I just had a quick question. -Uh-huh?
就是…
What...
你还记得那个互助小组的名字吗
Do you remember what the name of the support group is
就是海伦的丈夫以前去的那个
that Helen's husband used to go to?
纽约幸存者互助小组
那些声音前后相隔30秒左右
…and the sounds were coming, like, 30 seconds apart.
我确信只是车轮在轨道上摩擦的声音
I'm sure it was just a wheel on the tracks.
其他人都只觉得很吵
Everyone else was just, you know, annoyed.
我的身体开始颤抖
I physically started shaking.
我下了地铁 从运河街往上城区走
I got off the train. I just walked uptown from Canal.
我感觉就像个白♥痴♥ 我还迟到了
I mean, I felt like such an idiot. And I was late.
但我绝不会再回到那趟地铁上
I was not getting back on that train. -
噪音是非常能触发创伤的
Loud noises can be very triggering.
我想我们应该有很多人都曾深受其扰
I think a lot of us struggled with that.
我让孩子们玩游戏时把电视调成静音
I make my kids mute the TV when they're gaming.
噪音
他们很不高兴 但我听着游戏里的枪声或爆♥炸♥声
They hate it. But I can't get any work done
根本做不了任何工作
when I'm hearing gunfire or... or explosions.
你还让孩子玩那种游戏
You let your kids play those?
你不觉得这是在让人习惯那种 美化枪♥支♥暴♥力♥的文化吗
You don't think that's normalizing a culture that glorifies gun violence?
好了 不如我们休息一会吧
Okay, why don't we all just take a second
欢迎新朋友
and welcome our new addition.
大家好
Hi.
你好
Hi.
你叫什么名字 -丹妮
What's your name? -Danni.
上周凯♥旋♥门发生爆♥炸♥的时候 我在巴黎
I was in Paris last week when the bombings hit at the Arc.
我深表同情 你…
Oh. I am so sorry. Do you...
你想分享些什么吗 比如你的感受或想法
Do you wanna share anything about how you're... you're feeling, or your thoughts?
我今天只想听大家说说
I was just hoping to listen today.
当然可以 丹妮 等你准备好再说
Of course. Of course, Danni. In your own time.
我们这里都是幸存者
We're all survivors here.
查尔斯 要不你说两句吧
Charles, why don't you speak for a bit?
查尔斯是我们的一位新成员
Charles is one of our newer members.
他刚从英国回来
He just returned from the UK.
他也是一名炸♥弹♥袭击的幸存者
He's also a bombing survivor.
爱莉安娜·格兰德演唱会的爆♥炸♥ 他在现场
He was at the Ariana Grande concert.
听我说 想要忘却并不容易
Look, it's not easy…
好吗
Okay?
对我来说 已经好几年了
I mean, it's been years for me,
但我还是每周都得找人倾诉
and I still have to talk about it every week.
抱歉 这并不会让人感到安慰
I'm sorry. That's not comforting. Um…
并不是…
It's not like...
你的生命并没结束 好吗
Your life doesn't end. Okay?
我知道你现在可能觉得自己已经死了
I know that it probably feels like that right now.
只是…
It's just…
一切都变了颜色
Everything changes colors.
对 没错
Yes. That's... Exactly.
我永远想不出这种形容方式
I never would have thought to put it like that.
对你来说是什么颜色
What is it for you?
可能是紫色吧
Maybe purple.
你呢
What's yours?
红色
Red.
就好像一切都永远变成了红色
It's like everything is red forever.
一方面 红色让人感觉鲜活而强烈
And on one hand, it's really vivid and intense.
但另一方面 一切都彻底变成了…
But on the other, everything feels completely…
单色的
Monochrome.
你有同感吗 丹妮
You relate to that, Danni?
我…
I just...
好像有点明白“单色”的感觉
Sort of understand the monochrome bit.
对我来说一切也是单色的 但我的颜色…
That's how everything is for me too. But mine's like…
一直都是灰色的
Gray all the time.
世界看起来一片灰色是什么感觉
And how does it feel when the world looks that way to you?
我说不好
I don't know.
其实没有任何感觉
Doesn't really feel like anything.
只有麻木
Just sort of numb.
下周见
See you next week.
好 我绝对会回来
Yeah. I will 100% be back.
罗温 非常抱歉打扰你
Rowan, I am so sorry to do this to you,
但我女儿是你的超级粉丝
but my daughter is such a huge fan of yours.
能为了她跟我合个影吗
Would you mind taking a quick photo with me for her?
当然可以 -非常感谢
Yeah, of course. -Thanks. I really appreciate it.
我的润唇膏呢 可能忘拿了
Where's my ChapStick? Maybe I dropped it.
你们差点忘了这里还有一把椅子
You guys almost forgot this last chair.
来 -你真好
Here. -Oh, you're so sweet.
那…
So, um…
对了 我叫丹妮·桑德斯
I'm Danni, by the way. Danni Sanders.
我叫罗温 欢迎加入小组 -谢谢
Rowan. Welcome to group. -Thanks.
谢谢你今天的分享 我知道第一次可能挺难的
Thanks for sharing today. I know the first meeting can be hard.
你们会进行什么“会后咖啡”之类的吗
Do you guys do, like, post-group coffee or…
其实我得回学校参加一个排练
Actually I have to run to this school rehearsal thing.
当然 没关系 -下次吧
No worries, no worries. -Next time.
当然 -好
Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Yeah.
要不我们交换下照片墙用户名 或电♥话♥号♥码
Maybe we can swap Insta handles or numbers?
当然 好
Sure. Yeah.
好
Okay. Yeah.
给 有事随时给我发短♥信♥ 好吗
Here. Just text me anytime, okay?
谢谢
Oh, thank you.
再见 回头再聊
Bye. I'll talk to you later.
再见 查尔斯 -再见
See ya, Charles. - See ya.
联♥系♥人 罗温·奥尔德伦
你要是还想去喝咖啡的话 我现在有空
I'm actually free right now if you wanna go grab that coffee.
天
Oh, gosh.
我忘了还有点事要做 所以…
I forgot I have this thing that I have to do. So…
那就先这样
Yeah. Okay.
好 要不要我的照片墙用户名
Cool. Hey, did you want my Insta handle?
叫“喜欢上帝是女人的男人” 结尾有两个n
It's "godisawomanmann." Two Ns. "Godisawomanmann."
好
Okay.
《我不只是一个统计数字》 作者 罗温·奥尔德伦
政♥治♥版 10个理由证明罗温·奥尔德伦 是当下美国最需要的声音
罗温·奥尔德伦为何是我们永远的榜样
今天我们要聊聊罗温·奥尔德伦
Today we're talking about Rowan Aldren,
她是一名积极倡导枪♥支♥安全的 青少年活动家 也是诗人和网红
a teen gun-safety activist, poet and social influencer.
罗温在北卡罗来纳州的 橡树谷校园枪击案中有幸生还
After surviving the Oak Valley school shooting in North Carolina,
然后她来了纽约 与“我们受够了”组织合作
Rowan came to New York to partner with the We've Had Enough organization
开始了她枪♥支♥改革的奋斗事业 来看看
to begin her fight for gun reform. Here's a look.
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三公里
Two miles.
你在枪击现场三公里外仍能听到枪声
You can be two miles from a gunshot and still hear it.
那天 即便你并不在现场附近
That day, even if you were nowhere near it,
我发誓 那些枪声仍然震耳欲聋 让人心生畏惧
I swear, you heard those bullets loud enough to fear 'em.
三公里
Two miles.
但我那23名同学让枪声传得更远
But the 23 at my school carried much farther.
也许这就是孩子们沦为殉道者时的声响
Maybe that's just how it sounds when a child dies a martyr.
然而人们却一片沉默
And yet, it was quiet.
皮肤真好！
本不该如此沉默
Quieter than it should have been.
我们需要全社会的大声疾呼 却只得到了一首葬礼挽歌♥
We needed a riot and all we got was a funeral hymn.
还有人说 “你们就没人能对付他吗”