偷穿高跟鞋

闭嘴 你这个肥猪
Shut up, you fat pig!
你说"肥猪" 是认真的吗
Did you honestly just say "fat pig"?
你是我妹妹
You are my sister...
你说的最好听的就是"肥猪"
and the best you can do is "fat pig"?
滚出我的生活
Get out of my life!
有什么我能做的吗
Is there anything I can do?
我想要200块钱
I want 200 bucks.
这是现在市价对吧
That's the going rate, isn't it?
去纽约的下一趟火车是几点
When's your next train to New York?
12点18分
12:18.
莱福克威兹夫人
Mrs. Lefkowitz?
好了 来了
All right already!
噢 抱歉 我以为是我儿子了
Oh, sorry. I thought it was my son.
-我去拿单子 -好的
-I'll get my list. -Okay.
我不知道你儿子在这 真是不错
I didn't know your son was here. That's wonderful.
是啊 他说想看看我
Yeah, well, he said he wants to see me.
他现在在哪 在海滩上 盯着那些胸部
And where is he now? He's on the beach, looking at bosoms.
嘿 路易斯
Hey, Lewis
怎么了 你看起来像刚刚中风发作了
What's the matter? You look like you just had a stroke.
嗨 莱福克威兹夫人 嗨 艾拉 我没看到你
Hi, Mrs. Lefkowitz. Hi, Ella. I didn't see you.
好啊
Hello.
-她是隐形的 -你看起来很彷徨
-She's invisible. -You look confused.
谁需要这么多选择 肥皂罢了
Well, who needs all these choices? It's soap.
如果是我 忧郁不决时 我会选择最简单的包装
I say, when in doubt, go for the simplest box.
差不多每件事都是莎拉教我的
Ah. You know, Sharla taught me almost everything.
做饭 洗碗 怎么用手♥机♥
Cooking, dishes, how to use a cell phone.
从来没去过洗衣店
Never got around to the laundry.
你一定很想她
You must miss her.
嗯 每天都想 你呢
Mmm, every day. You?
我不认识你妻子 所以 不 我不能说我想
Well, I didn't know your wife, so no, I can't say that I do.
终于 要和路易斯费尔德曼约会了
Oh, finally, a date with Lewis Feldman.
你什么意思
What do you mean?
他一到这眼睛就没离开过你
He's had his eye on you since he got here.
别开玩笑了 他没有
That's ridiculous. He has not.
再说 这不是约会 我只是帮他洗衣服
Anyway, it's not a date. I'm just helping him with his laundry.
为什么 你觉得这个岁数的约会应该是啥样的
Why? What do you think dates look like around here,
去蹦极
bungee jumping?
相信我 那就是约会
Believe me, it's a date.
至少她走了
At least she's gone.
那她去哪了
Where'd she go to anyway?
我不知道 去我爸那了吧
I don't know. My dad's, I guess.
那很好 希黛尔又多了一件可以抱怨的事儿了
Well, that's good. Gives Sydelle one more thing to complain about.
你为什么哭
Which one are you crying about-
是被抢夺的伤痛 还是为那个没正形的傻瓜
the predatory prick or the shit-for-brains tramp?
因为这两样都不值得你掉眼泪
Because neither one deserves your tears.
艾米
You know, Amy...
我相信你是对的
I'm sure you're right...
但有时我希望你只是说
But sometimes I wish you'd just say...
伙计 那太糟糕了
Boy, that sucks...
我很难过发生了这一切
and I'm really sorry it happened to you.
-你是每个特嗨的节假日都穿这个么 -是的
-Do you have them for every high holiday? -Yeah.
逾越节上有个人说"怎么回事你的两个蛋看起来不太一样"
The Passover one says, "What makes this tuchis unlike any other?"
我儿子 老搞笑
My son, the joker.
这也是为我节假日不能见到他们 得一点儿补偿
Thinks it makes up for the fact that I don't see him on the holidays.
-他们去丈母娘家 -不错了 至少他结婚了
-They go to her parents. -Well, at least he's married.
-我儿子55岁 仍然单身 -是同性恋
-My son, 55, still single. -Gay?
我倒宁可他是同性恋 他不够成熟
I wish. Immature.
埃拉 跟我说说你的家庭
Ella, tell me about your family.
好吧 我丈夫艾拉生前是做房♥地♥产♥的
Well, my husband Ira was in real estate.
三年前死于癌症
Died three years ago. Cancer.
很有趣吗
That's funny?
不是 只是觉得我们的聊天方式是 丧偶介绍
No, it's the way we do that the dead spouse intro.
姓名 职业 他什么时候死的 死因是什么
Name, rank, when did he die, how.
但不确切
But not the specifics.
癌症没什么 但没有人说过"肺癌"
Cancer's okay, but no one ever says "lung cancer".
或者是 上帝不允许的"前列腺癌"
Or, God forbid, "prostate cancer".
你呢 有孩子吗
How 'bout you? Have any kids?
没有
No.
没有 一个孩子都没有
No, I don't have any children.
鲁弗斯 是鲁弗斯吗
-Rufus? Is that Rufus?
雪莉已经从欧洲回来了
Uh, is Shirley back from Europe already?
我以为 我以为她还要在卢夫斯再呆一个月
Ooh, I thought she, I thought she was boarding Rufus for another month.
是的 没错
She is. Yeah.
我只是在 遛 鲁弗斯
I just... walk... Rufus.
你有一个大爪
Oh, you're with the Elegant Paw.
-不 不 我是个 -嗨 卡洛
-No. No, I'm... -Hi, Carol.
-真乖 莫莉 -我是个自♥由♥职业者
-Good girl, Molly. -I'm... freelance.
-一个自♥由♥遛狗人 -噢 我明白了
-A... freelance dog-walker. -Oh, I see.
是的 我为养狗场工作 和狗狗们在一起 呃
Yeah, I work for kennels, with kennels, and, uh...
也给私人工作
with for individuals... too.
-她正是我们要找的 -没错
-She's just what we need. -Absolutely.
你的费用是
How much do you charge?
上帝啊 你真是救了我一命
Jesus! You saved my ass.
-你从哪找到他的 -就在 利顿豪斯附近
-Where did you find him? -Oh, just... wandering around Rittenhouse.
知道吗 我给这个女孩工作 她看起来很正常
You know, I give this girl a job. She seems normal.
然后我所知道的就是 她把这条狗带走了
Next thing I know, she's taken off with this dog.
你能想象的到 这样的事如果传出去 我就得关门大吉
You can imagine, something like this gets out, and I'm out of business.
那么 200块钱作为酬谢怎么样 够公平吗
So, how does 200 sound for a reward? Fair enough?
-我不需要酬劳 -你是谁 圣人
-I don't want a reward. -What are you, a saint?
不是
No.
我想用 别的方式代替酬劳
Uh, I was thinking... maybe instead of a reward...
你可向你的客户提供我的遛狗服务
you could offer your clients my dog-walking services.
只能由我提供
Exclusively.
我们可以五五分账
We could split the proceeds.
她的温内贝戈语不比他好多少
Not so much as the Winnebago he left her.
太可怕了
Oh, it's horrible!
你要是开始吃政♥府♥的奶酪 你就笑不出来了
You won't be laughing when you're eating government cheese.
喂
Hello.
-喂 -是埃拉·赫斯基吗
-Hello? -Is this Ella Hirsch?
是的
Yes, it is.
你有一个叫凯洛琳的女儿吗
Did you have a daughter named Caroline?
是的
Yes.
那你是在放假 还是
So, are you on vacation, or-
是的
Yeah.
嗯 天气很好
Mmm. Well, we've been having wonderful weather.
我很高兴你打来电♥话♥
I'm so glad you called.
很高兴你来这
I'm so glad you're here.
莱福克威兹夫人 这是我外孙女 麦琪菲勒
Mrs. Lefkowitz, this is my granddaughter Maggie Feller.
-你好 -嗨
-Hello. -Hi.
你一定饿坏了 我来给你弄点儿吃的
Well, you must be starving. I can, uh, fix you something to eat-
不用了 我没事
No, that's... I'm fine.
我只是
I just, uh-
-我很累 -好的 我带你去客房♥
-I'm really tired. -Oh. Well, let me show you the guest room.
从这边过来 这是卫生间
Um, it's right through here. Uh, this is the bathroom.
我会把干净的毛巾放在这 还有浴巾
And I'll put out clean towels and, uh, a washcloth.
床收拾好了
The bed's made up...
衣橱里还有很大的地方
and there are, um, extra blankets in the closet.
-外公还在吗 -不在了
-Is my grandfather around? -Oh. No.
不 艾拉三年前就去世了
No, Ira passed away over three years ago.
如果有任何需要就叫我
So, you'll call me if you need anything?
好的
Yeah.
嘿 你说过你没有孩子的
Hey, you said you didn't have children.
我说过我没有孩子
I said I don't have children.
我有个女儿
I had a daughter.
她的名字是凯洛琳 她死了
Her name was Caroline. She died.
她长什么样子
What was she like?
她 她和那个很像
Well, she was-she was exactly like that.
同样的眼睛 同样的皮肤
Same eyes, same skin...
同样的脸 一模一样
same face, identical.
但是她有 健康问题
But she had, um, health problems.