糟糕历史大电影：臭屁的罗马人

Hey! Hello!
-布狄卡 -大家都好吗
- Boudicca! - Everybody OK?
来吧 我们来做这个
Come, let's do this!
你好 凯尔特人 ♪
♪ 怎么样 伙计们 还好吗 ♪
♪ 我正在前进 ♪
♪ 我们今晚要去收割罗马人的头皮 ♪
♪ 现在很高兴来这里和你们在一起 ♪
♪ 很高兴见到你们 ♪
♪ 我希望一会能在 ♪
♪ 商品销♥售♥区见到你们 ♪
♪ 为了发动更多战争我们正在巡回演出 ♪
♪ 现在让我听到你们的吼声 ♪
♪ 我们相信罗马人最终一定会被赶出去 ♪
♪ 没别人 这事是罗马人自找苦吃 ♪
♪ 布狄卡不会饶了你们 ♪
一起击溃罗马敌人 ♪
♪ 所有人都说 是 ♪
♪ 是 ♪
♪ 布狄卡 ♪
为了返场加曲我们该做些什么呢
What shall we do for an encore?
去伦敦怎么样
How about London?
她真不可思议 看看她
She's incredible. I mean, look at her.
你在干嘛
What are you doing?
被几个凯尔特人吓到了吗
Oh! Not scared of a few Celts, are you?
你是想继续跳
Are you just gonna keep dancing
还是去救你的奶奶
or do you wanna go rescue your gran?
对
Yeah...
我就是这么想的
that's what I thought.
奶奶在那里
There's Gran.
我们走
Let's go.
你不能就这么贸然冲过去
You can't just barge in there.
我们会被♥干♥掉的
We'll get killed.
我们得聪明点
We need to be clever.
我们需要个计划
We need a plan.
好吧 大佬 你的计划是什么
Alright, big shot. So what is your plan?
之前的计划是在我们到这里之前逃走
Well, the plan was to escape before we got here.
所以现在
So now...
没有 什么都没想到
No...got nothing.
你之前说罗马人懂很多
You said Romans know stuff.
我们确实懂很多
We do.
对 我们确实是
Yeah, we do.
一株罂粟 你在送我花吗
A poppy? You're giving me flowers?
不是
No.
我在书里读到过这种罗马人的药
There's this Roman potion I read about in my scrolls.
只需再加几种成分
Just need a few more ingredients.
你敢
Don't you dare!
是这棵树
It's the tree.
我觉得我
I think I'm...
过敏了
a... allergic
起作用了
it worked.
能放倒他们多久
How long before they wake up?
我也不清楚
I don't know.
什么 你竟然不知道
What do you mean, you don't know?
我之前从没试过
I've never made it before.
我只是读到过它
I only read about it.
也就是说他们有可能随时醒来
You mean they could wake up any minute?
奶奶
Gran.
奶奶
Gran!
奥拉 你来了
Orla, you came.
他在干什么
What's he doing here?
说来话长 奥拉
Long story. Orla!
你能帮我砍掉这个吗
Can you chop this off for me?
我马上回来
I'll be back.
辫子 不是头
The plait. Not the head.
我懂 我又不是野蛮人
I know, I'm not a savage.
嗯
Mm...
罗马弹射器
Roman catapult.
学名叫投石机
Technically a ballista.
太棒了 那么
Awesome. Well...
它是罗马的 对吧 所以
It's Roman, isn't it? So...
现在我们需要的就是发射物了
Now all we need is a projectile.
比较重的东西
Something heavy.
怎么这么重
Not that heavy!
往后站站 奶奶
Stand back, gran!
干的漂亮 我这聪明的宝贝
Well done, my little brain ball!
有吃的
Oh, food.
我快饿死了
I am starving.
奶奶 不要
Gran, no!
不 他们快醒了
Oh, no, they're waking up.
-你怎么让它跑起来 -给它点萝卜
- How do you make it go? - Uh... give it a carrot.
-什么 你有萝卜 -没有
- What? You got a carrot? - No!
赶紧跑啊 快
Come on, quick!
亚迪 车闸在哪
Atti, where are the brakes?
奥拉
Orla!
等等
Wait.
奥拉 慢点啊
Orla, slow down!
快点啊
Oh, come on!
我们成功了
Whoooo! We did it!
伦 敦
伦敦着火了
London burns.
烧得”不错“
Great fire.
希望不要再发生了
Let's hope it never happens again.
布狄卡又攻破了一座罗马城
And so Boudicca destroys another Roman city.
她的军队超过了我们
Her army overwhelms us.
那一定是他
Whoa, that must be him.
那一定是保利努斯 总督
That must be Paulinus, the Governor.
跟在马赛克图案上的比起来小多了
He's a lot smaller than he looks in the mosaics.
百夫长达西穆斯·麦西斯向您汇报 长官
Centurion Decimus Maximus reporting for duty, sir!
我们可能寡不敌众
We may be outnumbered...
我们可能面对死亡
we may face certain death...
但我们必须打击凯尔特人
but we must strike the Celts
为了罗马的荣光
for the glory of Rome!
罗马的荣光
The glory of Rome!
有些人可能会这么说
Is what some might say.
但如果我们用血将这片草地染红
But if we turn this green grass red with our own blood
凯尔特人胜了
the Celts will win
那个时候罗马的荣光将会置于何地
and where will the glory of Rome be then?
最好是静观其变
Better to bide our time.
待时而动
Wait for another opportunity to confront her.
那是懦夫的借口
Would be the words of a coward!
我们宝剑出鞘就不能收回
Our swords once drawn cannot be sheathed
除非它们尝到十数个凯尔特人的鲜血
until they slay ten Celts each!
但生死不顾
It does not matter if we live or die...
却是匹夫之勇
would be the words of a rash man.
就让我们静观其变吧
We will wait.
让伦敦继续烧一会儿吧
Let London burn.
我们再等一个小时
We will have our hour later.
难道真的要等吗
Or will we?
是的 要等等的
Yes, we will.
保利努斯就是这么说的
And so speaks Paulinus.
我现在有点懵逼了
I'm a bit confused now.
我简直不敢相信我们刚刚发射了一个人
I can't believe we just fired a guy through the air.
谁教你做投石机的
Who taught you how to make a catapult?
无师自通 我只是在书上看到过
No one. I just read about them in my scrolls.
虽然 我们可能
Although, I think we may have
投石机是希腊哲学家、物理学家阿基米德发明的
借鉴的是希腊人的技术
borrowed that idea from the Greeks.
你偷师来的
You stole it?
是的 但也有很多伟大的发明创造
Yeah, but there's loads of other great things
是我们罗马人想出来的
we did come up with.
比如说呢 罗马澡盆
Like what? Roman baths.
其实 我觉得那也是借鉴希腊人的想法
Actually, I think we nicked that idea from the Greeks too.
你们罗马人真是一群贼
You Romans are such a bunch of thieves.
角斗士 可是地道的罗马特产
Gladiators. They're Roman.
什么是角斗士
What's a gladiator?
一些为了娱乐而战斗的人
Someone who fights for entertainment.
-你会爱上它的 -是的 听起来很酷
- You'd love it. - Yeah, sounds awesome.
我觉得能用我的剑
I could have cut those ropes
砍掉笼子上的绳索
on the cage with my sword.