我们或许会后悔（2024）

你现在没事了吧 亲爱的 -我挺好的 谢了
You're all right now, aren't you, darling? I'm doing fine, thanks.
经历中年危机的人又不是我 尽管这个危机很包容
I'm not the one having a mid- life crisis, albeit a very inclusive one.
他没事吧
WHISPERS: He's all right?
应该是
I think so.
一层 -这里是泰的留言信箱
Ground floor. You've reached the voicemail of Ty
开门
Doors opening.
嘿 你在这呢 怎么样啊
Oh, hey, you're here. How did it go?
嘿 嗯 泰呢 她不接电♥话♥
Hey! Yeah. Where's Ty? She's not answering.
我让她去买♥♥烟和扑热息痛了
Oh, I sent her out to get some cigarettes and paracetamol.
你不可以这么做 -为什么不行 她是私人助理啊
You can't do that. Why not? She's a PA.
不为你服务 靠 我要尿尿 -好的
Not your PA. Fuck, I need to pee. OK.
放松 别急 我帮你插导尿管 -什么
Relax. Relax. I'II do your cath. What?
怎么了 我大学做过一次
What? I did it once at uni.
你那次嗑了粉手都没知觉
Your hands were numb because you were on K!
就说你尿成没 -不好意思 你好
You peed! Um, excuse me, hi.
你这里有残疾人专用厕所吗 -有的
Do you have a disabled bathroom? We do. Yes.
严格来说还在建
Um, it is still technically being built,
但我们马上就会有了 这是重点
but we have one on the way, which I think is the headline.
真服了
Fuck's sake.
你确定记得怎么做吗 -记得
So, you sure you remember how to do...? Yeah.
我可会导尿了
Catheterisation is my middle name.
要你搞砸了 我会的尿路感染的 -是 我知道
If you mess it up, I'm going to get a UTI. Yeah, I know.
你会擦一下的对吧
So you're wiping there, right, yeah?
对 擦一下
Yeah. Wipe.
就是这样 擦
There we are. Wiping.
是
Yeah.
好 你看到尿道了吗
OK. Do you see the urethra?
嗯 当然看到了
Uh, yeah, of course I do.
在那儿呢 狡猾的小家伙
Ooh, there it is, sneaky little fucker!
好
OK.
慢点 -我知道 慢点嘛
Slowly! I know! Slowly.
我很温柔的 -不好说
I'ma gentle lover. I doubt that.
插♥进♥去了 看到没
Ah! Ooh! It's in. See?
都跟你说了我可以 我就像是撒尿的吹笛手
I told you I could do it. I'm like the pied piper of piss.
该死
Ooh, shit.
怎么了 你 -没
What? You've, uhNo.
只是有点 -不 不是的
It's just a little...No, it's not.
你右眼都闭上了
You're closing your right eye.
真的好痛
Oh, it really stings.
别舔嘴唇 -好咸
Don't lick your lips. Oh, and it's salty.
我想你了
I've missed you.
是 谁不会想念这个呢
Agh, yeah, who wouldn't miss this?
乔 你在模特身上擦尿哎
Jo, you're wiping piss on a model.
不是吧 她们签你了
Shut up! They signed you?
现在你终于成了靠脸吃饭的了
Now you're finally just a pretty face!
得偿所愿
It's all I ever wanted to be.
你能把我腿合上吗 -没问题
Can you close my legs? Yes. Yeah.
等残疾人厕所建好以后倒进去吧
For when the disabled loo's ready.
谢谢
Thank you.
乔 你干嘛呢
Jo! What you doing?
乔 -我讨厌迟到
Jo? I hate being late.
真不敢相信你没上来过
I can't believe you haven't been up here.
他可能用的是假身份呢
He could be living under a fake identity!
我知道你讨厌边界感 但这也太荒谬了
I mean, I know you hate boundaries but this is ridiculous.
你要我报♥警♥吗 -什么 不要
Do you want me to call the police? What? No.
她是我最好的朋友
She's my best friend.
可她搞得你成了这样
WHISPERS: But she did this to you.
什么
What?
弗雷娅 这里有间满是长得跟你一样的洋娃娃的房♥间
Freya, there's a room up here full of dolls that look just like you.
而且她们胸都可大了
And they have big boobies.
乔
Jo?
在呢
Yeah?
好 听着 我有责任
Right, listen, it's my responsibility
让你准时到达 -不要 泰 不 -我们得走了
to get you places on time. No, Ty, no. We have to go!
搞什么啊 泰 停下
What the fuck? Ty, stop!
该死
Fuck.
我们得谈谈
We need to talk.
当然
Absolutely.
这样行不通的
It's just...It's not working out.
你跟亚伯吗
You and Abe?
不是
No. Oh.
跟乔有关哈
It's about Jo.
我怎么了
What about me?
最好让弗雷娅自己说
Uh, it's probably best it comes from Freya.
不是 泰 只是出现过几次
No, Ty, it's just there have been a few instances when
虽然你不是一直如此 但我在想
...and it's not an all- the- time thing, but I do wonder if...
我在想也许 也许我们可以先
Maybe we just...It would be better if we maybe took a.
泰 你被解雇了
Ty, you're fired.
只是提前两周通知你
And there's two weeks'notice,
但今晚我还是欢迎你过来的 -哦
so I obviously want you to come tonight. Oh.
好吧 这也太
Right, yeah, that's totally, um
没毛病 我明白
That's fair. I get it.
我 我也觉得咱们都成好朋友了
I...I guess maybe since becoming such good friends,
也许本来就不该做同事
probably we shouldn't be colleagues anyway.
我同意
I agree.
太好了
Great.
我也同意
I agree too. Yeah.
她在这儿你 -嗨
Here she is. Oh. Hi.
真没想到你会来呢 -我把泰炒掉了
Didn't think you were going to show up. I fired Ty.
什么我把泰解雇了 -太好了
What? I fired Ty. Yes!
我是说 不会吧 她什么反应
I mean, oh, no. How did she take it?
嗨弗雷娅 -我觉得
Hi, Freya! Yeah. Well, I think.
嘿 这些混♥蛋♥是谁啊
Hey. Who are all these assholes?
主要是亚伯的朋友和家人
Mainly Abe's friends and family.
好吧 看起来 我要去尿个尿 -喂
OK, that looks like...I'm going for a wazz. Hey!
你知道乔打算跟我们住多久吗
Have you found out how long Jo is planning on staying?
你准备得好隆重 看看这一切
This is so lovely. Look at all of this.
这是用最高规格来接待我了
I feel...Aw! so welcome.
喜欢就好 可惜你错过了国歌♥
Oh, good. Shame you missed the national anthem.
是吗 -我们唱了四遍呢
Oh, yeah? We sang it four times.
好吧 这就有点恶心了
OK. That's kind of disgusting.
谢谢你
Thank you.
抱歉我喜欢用女洗手间 这里氛围更好
Sorry, I prefer the ladies. It's a better vibe.
显然是个妈宝男 -是因为我老二太大
Clearly, mommy issues. No, actually it's because I've got a massive cock
小便的时候男人会盯着看
and in the urinals people stare.
你妈究竟是给你的爱太多 还是没给够
So, what was it- too much love or not enough?
都不是 -厌女还是把女人理想化
Neither. Hate women or idealise them?
两者都有
Hmm...Both.
为什么这么问 你呢
Why, what about you?
简单 我有父亲情节
Oh, that's easy. Daddy issues.
我喜欢硬的
I like it hard.
好吧 你说对了 我妈在我十岁时就离开了
OK, you got me. My mum left us when I was ten. Hmm.
我就知道
I knew it!
得了吧 精神科医生 你才不知道
Fuck you, Esther Perel! No, you didn't.
至少你的老二挺大的 对吧
Well, at least you got a big dick out of it, right?
巨大
Massive.
你是谁
Who are you?
你真的在乎吗
Do you really care?
不在乎 不
Not particularly, no.
谢谢你
Thank you.
不客气
You're welcome.
伏特加马提尼
Vodka martini.
加了橄榄汁
Slightly dirty.
很有品味
Excellent choice.
他在尝试一些新舞步 -他所有舞步都试过
He's throwing some serious shapes. He's throwing ALL of the shapes.
从98年就开始了
From 1998.
你们是老朋友
Is he an old friend?
前夫
Ex- husband, actually.
我♥草♥ -我♥草♥就对了
Oh, shit! Oh shit is right.
”我♥草♥”就该是我们的结婚誓言
"Oh shit"could have been our wedding vows, actually.