辛普森一家

燥起来
Chunk it up.
但是巴仔 如果你竞选到学生会主席
But, Bart, if you run for president and win,
史校长会被气疯的
it'll drive Skinner crazy.
燥起来
Huh? Chunk it up.
每个厕所放樱桃炸♥弹♥ 再把蜂窝塞史校长车里
A cherry bomb in every toilet and a beehive in Skinner's car.
巴仔竞选学生会主席
它们进我耳朵里了
They're in my ears!
而且我们还能保住丽莎那个破音乐项目
And we'll save Lisa's stupid music program.
不要啊
No!
我们学校能冒险选个名字跟"屁"押韵的主席吗
Can our school risk a president whose name rhymes with fart?
巴仔
屁
六 五
Six, five.
四 三 二 一
Four, three, two, one.
巴仔的屁味 你们无需再忍♥受
Bart dealt it, but you don't need to smelt it.
下周四 请投乔瑟夫·昆毕三世一票
Next Thursday, vote Joe Quimby III.
请投昆毕一票
巴仔·辛普森竞选
他在我和屁的押韵上杀我们个措手不及
He's killing us on the Bart-fart rhyme angle.
这跟当初搞垮凯文·富谢一模一样
This is exactly what took down Kevin Kiarrhea.
等一下 他们敢玩阴的 我们也行
Hold on. Hold on. If they're gonna fight dirty, so can we.
我们要把他们的黑料查个底朝天
With exhaustive negative opposition research.
春田镇图书馆
不久将会被闪存取代
昆毕家的丑闻一大堆
The Quimbys have had so many scandals,
依旧毫无收敛
and nothing has stopped them.
从私酿酒 非法处理酒桶到满天飞的乱搞丑闻
From bootlegging to barrel shaving and so much philandering.
话说回来 一个家庭要折腾到何种地步才罢休
Also, how many bridges can one family drive off?
继续查缩微胶片吧
Ugh, just keep microfiche-ing.
胶片 胶片...
Fiche, fiche, fiche, fiche... fiche, fiche.
等等 布伟业
Wait a second. Bouvier?
昆毕继承人娶了工薪阶级的普通人
嫁给昆毕镇长的那个女人 长得有点像妈妈
That woman who married Mayor Quimby looks a little like Mom...
那个花童真是妈妈
And that flower girl is Mom.
照片里的人是我
Yeah, that's me in the picture...
新娘是我的姨妈碧翠斯
and the bride is my aunt Beatrice,
我不想聊这个
and I don't want to talk about it.
好吧 但我就只有几个问题
Uh, okay, but I just have a couple more questions.
抱歉 听不清 勺子掉进去了
Sorry, I can't hear you! I think a fork fell in.
告诉大家一个残酷的真♥相♥
I'm not afraid to tell you the hard truth.
富人买♥♥游艇就该享受减税优♥惠♥
The rich deserve tax breaks for yachts
还有勒罗伊·尼曼的画 以及这样的豪华晚宴
and LeRoy Neiman paintings and fancy dinners like this one.
儿子 演讲太棒了
Terrific speech, Son.
你的成长让我 你妈妈
You've grown up to make me, your mother,
还有我的五个情妇都感到自豪
and my five mistresses very proud.
小金刚
Oh, Donkey Kong Junior.
也许我们都能不辜负
Maybe we'll both live up to the expectations
受木桶诅咒的父亲们的期望
of our barrel-cursed fathers.
你正在错失为春田德市民
You're blowing your chance to do real
真正做些好事的机会
good for the people of Springfield.
你哪位
Who the hell are you?
碧翠斯·布伟业
Beatrice Bouvier.
我帮帮你拿咖啡的那个人拿咖啡
I get coffee for the person who gets you coffee.
听着 你的家世和你那张帅气小黄脸
Look, your family money and your pretty-boy good looks
是赢不了这次选举的
aren't going to win you this election.
你是说 我很帅
You, uh, think I'm pretty?
你本可以成就一番事业 但
You can make a real difference, but oh, no,
你不过是想讨好你那有钱的爸
you just wanna please your rich daddy
和他那群养尊处优的富豪朋友
and his lobster rattling friends.
我在期待什么 政♥治♥的首个牺牲品就是希望
Hmm. Who am I kidding? The first casualty of politics is hope.
当我白说
I quit.
别走 刀子嘴
Don't leave, you lippy dame!
想让我留下 你就得去真正的社区走走
If you want me to stay, you have to hit the real neighborhoods
见见那些你将要服务的民众
and meet the people you'll be serving.
好吧 但你得开车
Okay, but you're driving.
从这到那要折腾很多桥
There's a, uh, lot of bridges between here and there.
七大邋遢鬼盛宴
这里是懒汉镇 春田镇工人阶级的核心地带
This is Slobtown. The working-class heart of Springfield.
我爸当年一有机会就离开了这个社区
Ugh. My father left this neighborhood as soon as he could.
那是什么
Ugh. What is that?
那是懒汉镇肉锥 就是装满炖牛肉的华夫蛋筒
That's a Slobtown meat cone. A waffle cone full of beef stew.
好野蛮的人
Ugh, these people are animals.
还好他们没有投票权
Thank God they don't get to vote.
他们有 并且锥形杯能让他们一手吃
They do, and the cone allows them to hold stew in one hand
一手滚桶
while hooping a barrel with the other.
哦趴 哦趴 扇你儿
Oom-pah, oom-pah, slap your son
哦趴 哦趴 超好玩
Oom-pah, oom-pah, lots of fun...
小时候我爸就唱这个哄我睡
My father would sing me to sleep with this song.
失去丈夫的女人泪流满面
The widow drowned herself in tears
哦趴 哦趴 玩许多年
Oom-pah, oom-pah, fun for years
嘿 嘿
Hey! Hey!
傻瓜投掷赛
现在我懂了
I get it now.
政♥治♥的意义就是改善劳动人♥民♥的处境
Politics is about improving the lot of working folks.
碧翠斯 你愿意做我的竞选经理吗
Beatrice, will you be my campaign manager?
你发誓你能成为最好的自己吗
Will you promise to be the best version of yourself?
你是第一个我不愿意说谎的人
You're the first person I've never wanted to lie to,
所以当我给出肯定的答案 我没有说谎
so I'm not lying when I say yes.
我也许只是个被柠檬砸的傻瓜
I may be a lemon pelted simpleton,
但这好像就是真正的成长
but this feels like real growth.
脏乱差餐厅
选我 我将更多拨款到公园建设
Elect me, and we'll have more money for parks,
教育 和展现不同族裔儿童
education, and inspiring murals of
相处融洽的壁画
ethnically diverse children getting along.
一人一个肉蛋筒 我请客
Meat cones for both of you on the house.
要来张餐巾吗
Would you like a napkin?
不 没有肉汁喷在身上的肉蛋筒
No, because it ain't a Slobtown meat cone
就不是懒汉镇的肉蛋筒
unless you're wearing it.
昆毕 82
外星人说
As E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial said,
我们给家传达希望的讯息
we "phoned home" with a message of hope,
选民们对我们有虎眼般的决心
and the voters told us we have the "Eye of the Tiger".
你一直为我审查政策提案
You've always vetted my policy proposals,
但接下来我想提的没有事先经过你
but this one's all my own.
碧翠斯·布伟业 你愿意
Beatrice Bouvier, will you, uh...
愿意 愿意 一千个焦点小组的愿意
Yes, yes. A thousand focus groups, yes!
你是否厌倦了果冻里的创可贴
Are you tired of band-aids in the Jell-O?
带有裸♥露♥螺栓的儿童滑梯
Playground slides with exposed bolts?
所谓的富家子弟尝试管理我们的学校
And entitled rich kids trying to run our school?
现在是凌晨3点 你想恶搞谁
It's 3 a.M. Whose finger do you pull?
pull someone's finger 经典恶作剧 拉某人手指对方就会放屁
下个周二 为巴仔屁王辛普森投票
Next Tuesday, vote Bart "The Fart" Simpson.
兄弟 放屁梗玩的很强啊
Dude, way to flip the fart narrative.
天才的营销 丽莎
Oh, genius ad, Lisa.
看这个 在学校报纸的四象限投票民调中
And get this, in the school paper's poll of four-square players,
势均力敌
四象限投票表
你和昆毕二比二打平手
you're tied with Quimby two to two.
太奇怪了 但我还挺喜欢出名的
It's weird, but it turns out I love popularity.
不好意思 我有一串幼儿园的
Excuse me, I got a rope of kindergartners
等着和屁王击掌
begging for the Fart Man.
你 小乔·昆毕
Do you, Joe Quimby Junior,
是否愿意娶碧翠斯·布伟业做你的合法妻子
take Beatrice Bouvier to be your lawfully wedded wife?
我愿意 没有任何犹豫
Yes, I do, and there's no ums, uhs, or ahs about it.
我宣布你们正式结为夫妻 你可以亲吻新娘了
I now pronounce you man and wife. You may kiss the bride.
乔 你♥爸♥爸找你
Joe, your father wants to talk to you.
与懒汉镇的女孩结婚有利于团结
Marrying a slobtown girl will help us with the unions.
明智之举 孩子
Smart move, Son.
我和她结婚是因为我爱她
I married her because I love her.
以后别在公众场合这么说
Never say that on the record.
现在 你的形象还差一点
Now, there's one thing your image needs.
蒙特克莱尔小姐
塔科马港小姐
蒙彼利埃小姐
什么 情妇
What? Mistresses?
我爸爸说花♥花♥公♥子♥
Uh... My dad says being a philanderer
是我极男子气概的政♥治♥形象不可或缺的一部分
is an essential part of my hyper-masculine political image,
但是别担心 我和他说我绝对不会对你不忠的
but don't worry, I told him I would never cheat on you.
好吧
Oh, thank God.