辛普森一家

《辛普森一家》
第三十七季 第六集
一生之乐
桌游店
玩游戏 玩游戏 玩游戏 玩游戏
Games, games, games, games, games, games, games, games!
普通人 -没眼镜
Normals? - Two-eyes?
不入戏
In-casts?
怎么桌游店里像放学留校惩罚一样
Why does a game store feel like detention?
现代桌游可不是为了好玩的
Modern board games aren't about fun.
是为了练习经济和数学的
They're about economics and math.
所以 很好玩
You know, fun!
《汉萨同盟的会计师》《保险员》
《中级估税员》《买♥♥入与持仓 一款模拟股市投资的桌游》
巴托罗缪 求你救救我
Bartholomew! A little help, please!
我们已经史诗般地角色扮演六个小时了
We've been epic-fantasy roleplaying for six hours.
你能不能替我玩一会 我得去灌满陶瓷圣杯
If you'll sit in for me, I need to fill the porcelain chalice.
只有你能把尿尿说得这么逊
Only you could make peeing sound lame.
这破玩意怎么玩
How do I play this stupid game?
你得扮演我心爱的角色 丹德里恩·小玩笑
You must role-play as my beloved character, Dandelion Tenderjape.
费伦大♥陆♥的古灵精怪吟游诗人
The bardic imp of the Feyrealm!
等级:6 职业:说书人 种族:尿族
桌上严禁打趣
No pleasantries at table!
"冒险者小队进入了一个洞穴
"The party enters a cavern
在一堆闪闪发光的财宝上
where, atop a glittering treasure mound,
丹德里恩·小玩笑 索尔·大肌霸 "勇敢者"米萨格拉斯 圣徒安格斯
巨龙巴尔法玛戈正在沉睡"
sleeps the dragon Balfalmagog."
但我 "勇敢者"米萨格拉斯
Though I, Mythagoras the Bold,
曾经在炽热洞窟击败过
have vanquished every fire-drake and
数不清的火焰恶龙以及熔岩幼龙
lava wyrm in the Caverns of Hotness,
眼前的敌人汝等力不能及 及时撤退为妙
this foe is far beyond any of you. Retreat is what we should do.
我攻击
I attack!
你个白♥痴♥ 你会把我们都害死的
You idiot! You're gonna get us all killed!
只要我能把马丁的角色害死就行
So long as I get Martin's guy killed.
小队进入战斗
The party enters combat.
巨龙朝着身无盔甲的乐手喷出火焰
The dragon breathes fire at the defenseless lutist.
现在掷骰子来决定伤害
Rolling to determine damage.
28...28点火焰伤害
Twenty-eight... Twenty-eight points of fire damage!
太好玩了
Hilarious.
如果队友不出手的话
Without the help of his friends,
丹德里恩小命不保
a-Dandelion will surely a-perish.
"米萨格拉斯从不丢下队友"
Mythagoras the Bold leaves no companion behind!
只见我身形高大伟岸
With the bravery of the derring-do and
声音正义凛然地说到
the confident mannerism-free voice.
快看 米萨格拉斯在对战巨龙
Ah! Mythagoras is fighting a dragon.
大家快凑热闹啊
Everyone, freak out.
霜冻射线
Ice Blast.
闪电束
Lightning Bolt.
睡眠呼吸暂停
Sleep Apnea.
《巫术与扮演:超级繁琐细枝末节大全》
巨龙在绝望中使出了最后的杀招 死亡之卵
In a final act of desperation, the dragon lays Egg of Death.
我很确定一个小小的死亡之卵对我构不成威胁
I'm fairly certain I can handle one measly Death Egg. Likewise.
无敌护盾
全是1
One!
译注:本轮掷四个骰子的原因是优势掷骰 取其中的最高数字 1代表大失败
这怎么可以能呢
Great Sheldon's ghost. It can't be.
这不了可了能啊
It... Well, it's un-Frinkable.
死卵的致命爆♥炸♥穿透了法师的防御
The lethal "eggsplosion" pierces the wizard's defenses.
"勇敢者"米萨格拉斯倒下了 永远死亡了
And Mythagoras the Bold falls. He's dead.
我扮演米萨格拉斯20年了
I've been with Mythagoras for 20 years.
他是我最长久的朋友
He's my oldest friend.
为什么 为什么
Why? Why? Why?
巴仔 你害死了付教授的角色 你害大人哭了
Bart, you got Frink's character killed! You made a grown-up cry!
别告诉妈妈行吗
Uh... Don't tell Mom about this, okay?
巴仔 你用哪个脑袋以为我不会说呢
Oh, Bart, how could you even think I wouldn't?
是你
You.
教授你好
Um, hello, Professor.
巴仔的妹妹告诉我他做了件坏事
Bart's sister told me he did something bad to you,
但我一直没搞明白到底是啥
but I don't understand what it was,
给我解释了很多很多遍也没用
despite repeated explanations.
不管了 去道歉
Any-Anyway, apologize.
对不起我擅自开怪
I'm sorry I pulled a Leeroy Jenkins
译注:Leeroy Jenkins即魔兽世界的火车王梗 不顾队友擅自开怪导致团灭
导致米萨格拉斯死透了
and got Mythagoras perma-deathed.
我们带了点焦糖饼干来
Whoosh. Well, we brought caramel clumpies.
你这里太酷了
This place is the coolest.
至少我英勇的朋友是战死的
At least my heroic friend died in battle.
这也是他想要的归宿
It's what he always wanted.
所以你不生我的气
So, you're not mad at me?
强烈的情感反应只不过是
Oh, powerful emotional responses are
大脑化学物质达到的一个峰值而已 小伙子
just a spike in brain chemicals, lad.
我的大脑倾向于慎重思考
My brain prefers cogitation.
赞
Sweet.
很抱歉你失去了想象中的朋友
I'm so sorry you lost your imaginary friend.
你几岁来着
How old are you again?
靠 那坨糊糊电击我
Ow! This slime just shocked me!
它有没有解释原因吗 应该有解释的
Oh, did it explain why? It is supposed to.
作为伟大的法师
You see, as the mighty wizard,
我可以成为所有我不是的东西
I could be all the things that I am not.
我可以变得勇敢
I was, uh... Well, brave.
这是不是收缩射线
Is this a shrink ray?
是的 但只对西瓜有效
Uh, yeah. But it only works on watermelons.
真的有效
It sure does!
作为妈妈 我很努力地
As a mother, I've tried so hard
往积极方向转移儿子的精力热情
to channel my son's enthusiasms in a positive direction.
科学对巴仔的精力和想象力来说
Science could be a wonderful outlet
可以是一个很好的输出
for Bart's energy and imagination.
他可以当你的小助手吗
Could he be your helper?
野孩子 就是你
Rambunctious child. Yes.
你是否会接受一个实验室助手的职位
Would you accept the position of a lab assistant?
我是否会跟我无法理解的力量抗衡
Will I get to tangle with forces I can't possibly understand
并且尖叫"妈蛋 什么情况"
and scream, "My God, what have I done?"
至少一天一次
At least once a day.
算我一个
I'm in.
*一段诡异的友谊*
* A weird friendship *
自我复♥制♥3D打印机
*不太像的伙伴凑在一起*
* Unlikely pals Two peas in a pod *
*不太像的伙伴真的很难*
* Improbable chums And is it that hard? *
电子显微镜
*一段诡异的友谊*
* A weird friendship *
*一段诡异的友谊*
* A weird friendship *
巴仔和付临客
*诡异*
* Weird *
你知道在大学里
You know, in college,
他们会告诉你惰性气体不会燃烧
they're gonna try to tell you that noble gases don't burn,
到时候别提起今天哈
so don't mention today.
老兄 我不会去大学的 我蠢蛋一个
Dude, I'm never going to college. I'm dumb.
蠢蛋 那是你能称呼自己的最糟糕的方式
"Dumb"? Well, that is the worst thing you can call yourself.
你收回这两个字
You take that back!
干嘛啦 我是蠢蛋 没事
What? I am dumb. It's fine.
蠢蛋可以做很多酷事
Dumb guys can do lots of cool stuff.
永远是蠢蛋享蠢福 赢个彩票啥的
It's always a dumb guy who wins the lottery.
你不是蠢蛋
You're not dumb.
所有人都知道我是
Everybody knows I am.
是吗 我不认同
Oh, yeah? Well, I don't.
是啦 是啦 是啦 -不是 不是
Am too. Am too. Am too. - Are not. Are not.
不是 不是 不是 不是 就不 就不
Are not. Are not. Are not, not, not, not, not.
如果你蠢字开头 我就不会跟你做朋友
I would not be friends with you if you were the D word.
这是啥
What is it?
巴仔问这是啥 你回了啥
So when Bart said, "What is it," what did you say?
我回 这是一封请柬
I said, "It's an invitation."
你被邀请了
付临客教授的大学聚会
Professor Frink's college reunion is
是在亿万富翁的私人庭院
at some billionaire's private compound,
但他只会在我陪同下一起去
but he'll only go if I go with him.
巴仔会很有帮助的
Bart would be quite helpful.
社交行为对我来说 可以说是有难度的
Social interaction can be, uh, well, uh, tricky for me.
什么
What?
不会吧 -有个性先生
No! - Mr. Personality?