节哀顺变（2018）

我老公死得毫无意义
My husband died for nothing.
你知道你丈夫的手♥机♥密♥码♥吗
Do you know your husband's passcode to his phone?
当然
Of course.
天啊
Jesus!
如果我问八岁的麦特
If I were to ask 8-year-old Matt,
他真正想要什么，他会怎么说
what he really wanted, what would he say?
我想画漫画
I wanted to make comic books.
这太棒了
This is amazing.
小淘气死掉那天…
That day Rogue died...
是圣诞节的隔天，对吧
it was the day after Christmas, right?
因为他正是在那天知道他要娶你
That was the day that he knew he was gonna marry you.
12月26日
1226.
我想他有很多事是我不知道的
I think there was a lot about him I didn't know.
(留言信箱)
(小蕾)
(我要去杂货店)
(Hey, I'm just running to the grocery store.)
(要我帮忙买♥♥什么东西吗)
(Can you let me know if there's anything you want me to get?)
(祝你行山愉快，再见)
(I hope you're having a nice hike. Bye.)
拉斯科尔尼科夫为何如此担心妹妹
So why is Raskolnikov so concerned for his sister's safety here?
是因为云迪素告诉他家人最重要
Is it because Vin Diesel told him the most important thing is family,
然后开着50万的车离开吗
and then drove off in a half-a-million-dollar car?
各位，我们还剩六周
Guys, we have 6 weeks left.
现在放弃太早了
Way too early to check out like this.
拜托
I mean, come on.
在这节课结束前给我一点回馈吧
Give me something before the period ends.
不，等等…
No, wait, hold up...
这样吧
How about this?
先读前六章
Read the first 6 chapters,
如果你们还是觉得如此沉闷
and if you're still this bored,
我们找点更刺♥激♥的书本
we'll find something more exciting,
把罗拔佛洛斯特换成肯迪拿玛
and we'll swap out Robert Frost for Kendrick Lamar?
但你们要认真读，或者要装得更像
But you have to really read it, or do a way better job faking it.
好吧
All right.
(我…要结账了)
(Hey, I'm...checking out,)
(你想要什么就告诉我)
(so if there's anything you want, let me know.)
(好吧，我猜你手♥机♥还是没有讯号♥)
(Okay, I guess you're not getting service yet.)
准备好了吗
You ready?
我无法决定要穿哪件衬衫
I can't decide what shirt to wear.
男生的衬衫不是全部一样的吗
Aren't all men's shirts the same shirt?
你穿任何一件也很好看
Well, you look good in all of these.
这件呢？这件不错
How about this one? This is fun.
(可以请你回电吗)
(Hi. Can you please call me back?)
(我开始担心了)
(I am starting to worry.)
(请回我电♥话♥，让我知道你没事)
(Please just give me a call, so I know you're okay.)
(爱你，再见)
(Love you. Bye.)
若艺术变成24小时的新闻周期呢
What if art becomes like the 24-hour news cycle?
当所有东西快速面世时
When everything comes out quick,
保存期限就如一加仑牛奶一样
it has the shelf life of a gallon of milk.
如果最后我们要活在初稿的世界呢
What if we end up living in a world of first drafts?
真的吗
Really?
什么事
What?
你在派对表现奇怪
You were weird at the party,
回家的路上一句话也没说
you didn't say a word on the car ride home,
现在你又想直接上♥床♥睡觉
and now you want to go straight to bed.
我累了
I'm tired.
大家也累了，今天是星期五
Everyone is tired. It's Friday.
你完全封闭自己
You completely shut down.
因为我听了罗拔的笑话却没笑吗
Because I didn't want to laugh at Rob's jokes?
他说他非常佩服
He said he was so impressed
我愿意自我牺牲做老师
with my self-sacrifice in being a teacher.
真不敢相信他竟然会称赞你
I can't believe he gave you a compliment.
反♥社♥会♥人格　　他是做金融业的
-What a sociopath. -He's in finance.
他在挖苦我赚得少，小蕾
It was a dig about how little I make, Leigh.
你为何所有事也要用麦特的思维
Why do you have to run every nice thing
分♥析♥别人对你的赞美
someone says to you through the Matt Machine,
然后觉得那其实是侮辱
to figure out how it's secretly an insult?
也许是因为我对冷笑话没兴趣
Maybe because I'm just not interested in laughing at unfunny jokes,
也不想假装对低能故事有兴趣
and pretending to be interested in lame stories.
若你不想去，你可以待在家里
You could've stayed home if you didn't want to go.
是吗？你会让我待在家里吗
Yeah, really? You would've let me stay home?
我知道你现在很不好受
I get that you're going through a hard time right now.
我以为出去走走会让你舒服些
I just thought that going out might make you feel better.
出去走走对我没帮助，小蕾
Yeah, going out doesn't do that for me, Leigh.
有时你很确定自己不会觉得开心
Well, sometimes, you're... sure that you won't have fun,
然后你又觉得开心…
and then you do, and...
庆幸自己有出去
then you're glad you went, sometimes.
整天躺在床上绝对不会让你开心
But what never makes you feel better is lying in bed all day.
还有一件事也不会让我开心
You know what also never makes me feel better,
就是我老婆对我大吼
is when my wife yells at me.
我没有对你大吼
I'm not yelling.
我很难想哪本书能让学生保持清醒
It's hard to figure out what book might keep my students awake,
当我一直收到警报说世界即将毁灭
when I keep getting push alerts that the world is going to hell,
加上夏天快到了
and with summer coming up,
我有更多时间像这样胡思乱想
I'll have even more time to spiral out like this.
你觉得你的药没效了吗
You feel like your medication has stopped working?
我的思考循环无法停下，所以…对
I have thought loops that I can't stop, so yeah.
会有这种情况，这已经是最高剂量
Happens. We've reached the maximum dose with this one.
再试另一种吧
We'll try another.
你试过舍曲林吗
Have you tried sertraline?
还没，每次我尝试新药物
Not yet. You know, every time I cycle onto something new,
我连看狗食广♥告♥
I end up crying
也会哭　　你知道那是暂时的
-at dog food commercials. -You know that's temporary.
我今天会寄出处方笺
I'll send the prescription in today.
我们多聊聊夏天吧
Let's talk more about summer.
理想上，这次放假会做什么
Ideally, what does this break look like?
我想多点运动和冥想
Well, I wanna exercise more... and meditate.
小蕾的爸爸和继母
And Leigh's dad and stepmom gave us this gift certificate
给了我们棕榈泉酒店的礼券
to some...hotel in Palm Springs.
是现实还是理想
That real life or ideal life?
皆是，但夏天气温高达华氏110度
both...though it's 110 degrees in the summer,
秋天可能比较理想
so probably ideal fall.
我知道小蕾会很高兴
And I know Leigh would love it
若我画完漫画的话
if I finished my comic book.
小蕾会很高兴？
Leigh would love it?
我可能会想画完
I might want to finish it.
对，这是我想看的漫画
Yeah, I mean, you know, it's a comic that I wanna read,
所以我想完成创作
so I wanna create it.
就为了让你看？只有你吗
Just so you can read it? Only you?
天啊，我…
Oh, boy. I...
我想…好吧
I want...yeah.
我希望大家也能看到
I want everyone to read it.
为何这很难说出口
Why is that so hard to say?
再说一次，就算很难说出口也好
Say it again. Even if it's hard.
我希望大家也能看到
Okay, I want everyone to read it.
我希望大家也能看到
I want everyone to read it.
我…希望它能出版
I...want it to get published.
我想…
I want...
我想看到它在我最爱的漫画店里
I wanna see it on my favourite shelf
放在我最爱的书架上
in my favourite comic book store.
我想一个像我这样的孩子
I want some kid who's like I was
把它拿起来，然后…
to pick it up and...
极度喜欢它，会叫朋友一起阅读
and love it so much they make their friends read it.
所以你今年夏天会完成
So you'll finish it this summer.
不只是完成，其实我快完成了
It's not just finishing it, which I'm actually pretty close to.
难的是告诉别人
It's telling people about it.
我得用线上作品集推销我的书
I have to pitch my book with my online portfolio,
我去年已经弄好了
which I set up last year,
你现在是全世界第二个
and you're now the second person in the world
知道这本书存在的人
who knows it exists,
若我做了这些事，书真的出版了呢
and if I do all that, well, what if it gets published?
麦特…
Matt...