皮特的糟糕生活（2010）

欢迎收看 Pete正呆在一家当地咖啡馆里
Welcome, and you join us at Pete's local cafe,
他看上了一个相当有吸引力的年轻美女
where he's got his eye on a rather attractive young lady
马丁•海德格尔 德国哲学家 20世纪存在主义哲学的创始人和主要代表之一 <存在与时间>是他的代表作
她正在看马丁 海德格尔的<存在与时间>呢
who's reading Martin Heidegger's Being and Time.
你算是个哲学家吧 Terry
You much of a philosophy man, Terry?
差不多 我最近看过的一本书
Oh, very much so. Last one I read was
<克拉克森眼中的世界> 是英国作家及主播杰瑞米•克拉克森在<星期日泰♥晤♥士♥报♥>上的连载合集
是<克拉克森眼中的世界>
The World According To Clarkson.
这可是本发人深省的好书
It really makes you stop and think.
你想想 为什么会有这么多球果在高速公路上
I mean, why are there so many cones on the motorway?
事实上 我更喜欢看
Indeed, and I'd like to see
马丁 海德格尔试驾法拉利F40
Martin Heidegger test drive a Ferrari F40.
不错
Aye!
谢谢了 兄弟
Thanks, mate.
你好啊 小兔兔
Hi, Bunny.
噢 天哪
Oh, Lord!
看 Jake从南极洲回来啦
Look, Jake's back from the Antarctic.
啊 是Jake啊
Jake! Ha-ha-ha.
呃 你还好么 过得怎么样
All right, mate, you OK, yeah?
快跟他们讲讲你都干了什么
Tell them your news!
可他们并不感兴趣啊
They won't want to know that.
才不是呢
Nah.
他们感兴趣的 快讲讲
They do, tell them!
据称自然界里并没有一模一样的雪花 但科学界依然对此有所纷争
呃 我发现了两片一模一样的雪花
Well, I discovered two identical snowflakes.
这可是革命性的发现
It's going to revolutionise chaos.
别这样
No, not that.
"评脸"给Jake打了8.9分
Judge My Face has said that Jake is an 8.9.
你竟然发你自己的照片到"评脸"
You sent your own picture into Judge My Face?
这也太自恋了 不是吗
That's a bit vain, innit?
实际上是南极站的妹子们发的
The ice station girls sent it.
我都不知道南极站还有妹子
I didn't know there was girls at the ice station.
是的 实际上全是妹子
Oh, yeah, it's all women.
除了我们的飞行员 可我们都有大半年没见过他了
Apart from the pilot, and we didn't see him for six months.
天啦 所以整个南极圈
What, so it's just you,
就你一个男的 和一堆妹子共存
in a biosphere in the South Pole with a load of girls?
是的
Yeah.
更搞笑的是 在南极洲冬天严寒里
The irony is, in the Antarctic winter,
南极站内却热得过火
the ice station's so overheated,
大家日常就穿着内衣到处走
everyone just walks round in their underwear.
所以 你也 你是不是
Oh, so did you ever, er...?
在南极圈发生的就永远留在南极圈吧
What happens in the South Pole stays there.
哦
Ohhh!
拜托 这些都不是重点好么
Look, all of this is off the point.
可这是过去五年里他说的唯一能激起我们兴趣的东西
It's the only interesting thing he's said in five years.
关键在于 Jake得分有8.9
The point is, Jake is an 8.9.
当然我一直觉额你挺帅的 但是8.9分诶
I mean i know you're handsome,but 8.9
呃 他可不是唯一一个被幸运女神眷顾的
listen, he's not the only one with good news.
我在一个体育杂♥志♥赢了个比赛
I have won a competition in a sports magazine.
哇
Ooh!
中了两张<妈妈咪呀>的
Yeah? Two free tickets
免费门票
to see Mamma Mia.
我超爱<妈妈咪呀>
I love Mamma Mia!
我都看了12次了 对吧 rob
I've seen it 12 times, haven't I, Rob?
对的 对的
Yeah. Yeah.
可是Rob从来没看过 总是说有工作啊什么的
Rob's never seen it. It always clashes with work or something.
本来有机会去的 可我连着三次都感冒了
And I've had flu the last three times.
那么现在你俩可以一起去了
Now you can both go and see it!
事实上 呃 我现在感觉又有点感冒迹象
Actually, ahem... I'm feeling a bit flu-ey at the moment.
但是 我还是能去的吧 Pete
But I can still come, Pete.
那得有多棒啊
It would be a scream.
我要带上我的歌♥词本 我们还可以打扮一下了
I'd bring my lyric sheets and we can dress up.
他就是不知道什么时候该闭嘴 对吧
He couldn't keep his mouth shut, could he?
什么时候
When is it?
明天晚上
Tomorrow night.
不是吧 那我去不了了
Oh, no. I can't go.
哦 真的么 真可惜呀
Oh, shit, what a bugger.
所以 到底什么样的体育杂♥志♥
So, what sort of sports
会拿<妈妈咪呀>的门票当奖品
magazine has Mamma Mia tickets as a prize?
<女性健康>
Women's Fitness.
那你怎么就看起这本杂♥志♥了
What were you doing with that?
我宽带信♥号♥♥不大好嘛 所以我就
My broadband's down at the moment. So...
每次和Jake见完面 Pete总要清理一下他自己脑子
Pete always needs to clear his head after seeing Jake.
他看到了一家慈善商店 可惜已经关门了
And he's seen a charity shop. It's closed,
但是他习惯了在大庭广众之下翻垃圾
but he's displaying the confidence of a man
来展现他的男子气概
well used to rifling through a bin bag in public.
这太好看了
That's a beauty.
派特里克·莫安 演员 代表作品有<李尔王> <大英风流帝国>等
就像年轻的派特里克 莫安
Like something a young Patrick Mower wore
<爱默戴尔> 英国经典连续肥皂剧 故事发生在一个假定的叫做♥爱♥默戴尔的村庄 是英国第二长的连续剧
在加入<爱默戴尔>之前会穿的衣服
before he joined Emmerdale.
那件夹克似乎让他开心了许多啊
That jacket seems to have cheered him up no end.
我觉得他在那儿是觉得自己挺美的 Colin
I think he fancies himself a bit there, Colin.
什么 Terry 他不会打算偷它吧 不会吧
What's this? He's not nicking it, is he, Terry?
不 他会在明天早上回来的
Nah, he'll come back tomorrow morning
然后给他们钱
and give them the money.
那可真不错 可他看起来真的就像他在偷衣服
Very honourable. He just did look like he was nicking it.
哇 你看起来真棒
Wow, you look great.
这可是件不错的夹克
That is quite a jacket.
这不过是糖霜 我才是蛋糕
It's the icing. This is the cake.
你看起来就像白马王子 我的相机呢
You look like a dreamboat. Where's my camera?
千万别这样 你不要拍照
No, no way, you're not taking a photograph.
哦 这一记马屁真真拍对地方了
'Oh, this is the boost his ego needed.'
你看起来真棒
You've got such a good energy.
来 说 茄子
Now say, "Cheese".
不 我才不要说 茄子
No, I'm not going to say things like... cheese.
我今天只买♥♥了这件外套 让我只是想看看我能不能
Just bought this coat today and I'm just trying to... see if I...
我不喜欢别人偷♥拍♥我
I don't like having my photograph taken.
天啦 这也太尴尬了吧 我只是想做点我自己的事
God, this is really embarrassing. I'm just here doing my thing,
差不多准备好了吧
kinda getting ready...
唉 本来开始挺有趣的 结果最后
Well, what started as a bit of fun turned into
变成了两小时的拍照时间 不过这是在干什么
a two-hour photo shoot, but what's this?
他正要把照片发给 "评脸"
He's sending it to Judge My Face.
这可真是局势大逆转啊
That has got volte face written all over it!
现在他要做的就是遵守他对慈善商店的诺言了
Now he just has to make good on his promise to that charity shop.
他正在考虑呢
He's been thinking about that.
他一开始想着要不给20英镑
First he thought he'd give them 20 quid.
后来他又觉得他帮了他们一把
Then he thought he's saving them the problem of
解决了洗晒的麻烦 所以他只打算给十英镑
cleaning and hanging it, so he'd give them a tenner.
然后很快就减到8块
This quickly went down to eight
现在就只打算给5块了
and it's currently standing at a fiver.
你可真善良
How kind of you.
只是尽我的一份力
Just trying to help.
谢谢了
Thank you.
不错的夹克
Lovely jacket.
谢谢你
Thank you.
理查德·柯蒂斯 新西兰编剧 导演 演员 他的作品风格轻松搞笑 在喜剧界很大的影响力 作品有<憨豆先生2> <憨豆先生卡♥通♥版> <真爱至上>
一英镑 天啦 如果理查德 柯蒂斯死了
A pound, oh, dear. If Richard Curtis was dead,
他都会从坟墓里气活过来的
he'd be spinning in his grave.
看起来Pete好像收到"评脸"的评分了
Oh, and it looks like Pete's got a reply from Judge My Face,
而且意想不到的是
and amazingly,
他们居然给了他9.3分
they rate his looks at 9.3.
他要高兴坏了吧 Terry
He's got to be pleased with that, Terry.
令人震惊的评分 而且他还是一头卷发啊
A remarkable performance, and with curly hair too.
如果他拉直了头发
If he'd have got the straighteners out,
说不定就9.5了
he might have got that up to a 9.5.
有道理 你之前在比赛的时候 你和你的队友
Indeed. When you were playing, did you and your team-mates
有没有试着给队内弄个长相排名
have a way of working out who was the best looking?
Pan's People 英国电视舞蹈团 主要是在BBC现场直播的流行音乐节目Top of the Pops的伴舞
一般取决于你睡过多少Pan's People的女孩儿
Basically, how many of Pan's People you'd slept with.
苏珊·乔治 英国电影 电视演员 电影制片
如果睡得是世界小姐或者苏珊 乔治 那么一个顶两分
A Miss World or Susan George, that counted for two.
哎呀 美好的时光
Huh, wonderful times.
9.3 哈哈哈
9.3, ha-ha-ha.