老妈撞入电视台（2017）

Great News S01E09

Part 2 July 12, 2020, 2:01 p.m.

Why are you willing to just risk it all
和安琪逃课呢
to play hooky with Angie?
因为我没法去上课
Because I can't go to school.
因为我遭到了...
Because I have a...
霸凌
bully.
我的天妈
Oh, my God, Mom.
没错我得替他做作业
Yeah, I have to do his homework for him.
他命令我该做什么坐在哪儿
He tells me what to do and where to sit
什么时候去卫生间
and when to go to the bathroom.
妈你是在说你的老师吗
Mom, are you talking about your teacher?
-好吧 -真行
- Okay, fine. - Great.
我不去的原因凯蒂
I haven't been going, Katie,
是因为太难了
because it's too hard.
第一天教授来讲课
The first day, the professor came in
然后他让我们把作业转换成PDF
and he said for all of us to turn our work into a PDF.
-谁是皮蒂·艾福 -天
- Who's Petey F.? - Oh, my God.
我和皮蒂·弗朗西斯从小玩到大
I grew up with a Petey Francis,
行吧然后我把作业发给他
so, okay, I sent my work to him.
他没有回复我于是老娘不干了
He didn't respond. So I quit.
妈你根本没走心
Mom, ya barely tried.
我需要帮助而不是嘲讽
Okay, I need help. Not ridicule.
好吧
All right.
你还记得你四年级的时候有多挣扎吗
When you were in the fourth grade and you were struggling,
你差点挂了数学
you almost failed math,
要不是我教你新颖溜口的说唱
and you would have if I didn't teach you
你肯定早就挂了记得吗
with fresh and funky raps. Remember?
*我的名字叫凯柔*
*Yo, yo, my name is Carol*
*在这里我想说*
*And I'm here to say*
*到哪里分数都是无敌屌♥*
*Fractions are bomb-diggity in every way*
是啊我得了D
Yeah, I got a D
因为你的说唱只是在歌♥颂分数
'cause your raps were just about how great fractions are
而且用词十分暴♥力♥
and they were filled with curse words.
好吧你不懂嘻哈你还差点种族天赋
Okay, you just don't get hip-hop. I raised you too white.
好吧
Okay.
妈我没时间帮你了
Mom, I don't have time to help you,
我真的不能再分心了
and I really can't be distracted.
*我的名字叫凯柔我在为学业犯愁*
*Yo, yo, my name is Carol and I'm failing school*
*我女儿不帮我一手更让我忧愁*
*My daughter won't help me and that ain't cool*
*腊鸡快走*
*Bleep her*
*腊鸡快走*
*Bleep her*
腊鸡
Bleep!
那里就是让奇迹发生的控制室
And that is the control room where the magic happens.
-有奇迹发生吗 -我只是打个比方
- Is there magic happening? - I mean metaphorical magic.
奇迹只能活在比喻里
Oh, it's always metaphorical magic.
鼎鼎大名的查克·皮尔斯
The great Chuck Pierce.
我还记得萨♥达♥姆♥的雕像
I still remember your report
压瘪你的移♥动♥厕所时
when the statue of Saddam Hussein fell
你做的报告
on your Porta Potti.
谢谢您的赞美马洛克夫人
What a wonderful compliment, Dame Marlock.
很高兴能见到您
It's a pleasure to meet you too.
格雷格几乎从不说起你
Greg has told us so little about you.
我只是觉得不应该
Well, I just feel it's inappropriate
把家里的私事带到工作场所
to bring family drama into the workplace.
快去上学妈
Yeah. Go to school, Mom!
我太老了
I'm an old woman!
那好
Okay, fine.
但我要一个《冰雪奇缘》周边背包
But I want a backpack with "Frozen" on it.
周边背包的事我们改天再说
We will talk about a backpack with "Frozen" on it.
天啊那是谁
Good lord, who's that?
那是我们60多岁的老实习生凯柔
That is our 60-year-old intern, Carol.
不不是她
No, not her.
你确实应该多雇用几个老女人
You know, you should hire more older women.
我们几乎不吃东西更节约成本
We don't eat, so it's cost effective.
我是说特冲的那个在吼她的那个
I mean the shrill one. The one that was yelling at her.
那是凯蒂
Oh, that's Katie.
就是她正在采访那个黑客的大新闻
She's the one who's been working on that big hacking story
我跟您说过的
I was telling you about.
对了那个饼干游戏
Ah, yes. The biscuit game.
我想再深入了解一下
I'm anxious to know more about that.
凯蒂你的新闻采访得怎么样了
Katie, any updates on your story?
不怎么样不过求你继续不停地叨叨叨
Uh, no, but please keep bugging me about it every second
因为对我实在是太有帮助了
'cause that's super helpful.
好吧你就赶紧翻完那些盒子
Okay, well, just get through those boxes
因为我们可不想让那新闻被抢挖
because we do not want to get scooped.
论挖东西我可是大♥师♥
Uh, don't have to tell me about scooping.
我每晚都吃两大杯冰淇淋呢大兄弟
I eat two pints of ice cream every night, pal.
你的职工就这么跟你说话
Is this how the staff talks to you?
我可真是失望透了格雷高里
Well, I'm very disappointed, Gregorious.
查克我需要你帮我个忙
Chuck, I need to ask you a favor.
给你新闻给你爱
With love and news,
查克·皮尔斯
Chuck Pierce.
不是这个我祖母挺喜欢你的
Nope. My gram apparently likes you,
所以她肯定非常乐意
and would dearly love it
请你来参加今晚的晚餐
if you could join us for dinner this evening.
你怎么敢拉我的皮条
How dare you try to pimp me out.
我是个新闻家不是只鸭
I'm a newsman, not a courtesan.
不管你听说了什么我和琼·柯林斯的绯闻
No matter what you've heard about me and Joan Collins.
拜托了我只希望她这一趟能顺利
Please. I just really need this visit to go well.
这世界上再也没有比
There is nothing sadder in this world
恶劣的祖孙关系
than a strained relationship
更让人难过的了
between a grandmother and a grandson.
爱哭一边哭去吧
Oh, cry me a river.
我的祖辈全死了
All my grandparents are dead.
有两个是互掐掐死的
Two of them at the hands of each other.
你说得对抱歉
Ah, you're right. I'm sorry.
我是这个家族的异类不是你的错
It's not your problem I'm the black sheep of the family.
异类就你
Black sheep? You?
你算是咱们这里少有的三观正的了
You're a goody-two-shoes loser around here.
你做了什么没被魔法学校录取吗
What'd you do? Not get into Hogwarts?
祖母让我在她在英格兰的一家
Gram gave me a shot at working in the news
新闻社试手而我
at one of her companies in England and I...
你教我的那个美国俗语怎么说来着
What's that American expression you taught me?
-搞黄了 -没错
- Beefed it. - Yeah.
多用用
Keep using that.
在丢人丢尽之后
After my public humiliation,
我决定来到美国向她证明
I decided to come to America to prove to her
我有能力在家族事业中承担责任
that I'm worthy of carrying on the family business.
你奶奶听着是个女强人啊
Your gram sounds like a tough woman.
让我想起了我前妻达琳
Reminds me of my ex-wife, Darlene.
她也是颐指气使喜欢操纵人
She was bossy, manipulative.
她逼我把马尾巴辫都剪掉了
She made me cut off my ponytail.
你说啥你说我应该把辫子留回来
What's that? You think I should grow it back?
好吧
Okay.
算了我想祖母她会理解的
It's fine. I'm sure Gram will understand.
等等你知道吗
No, wait. Hey, you know what?
-我会去和你们共进晚餐的 -真的
- I will go to dinner with you. - Really?
当然我要教教你
Yeah, if only to teach you
该怎么在恶女面前挺直腰板
how to stand up to a monstrous woman.
不查克我真的不希望出任何乱子
No, Chuck, I really need this to go well.
她买♥♥单对吧因为我会点
She's buying, right? Because I will be ordering
一大碗开胃汤
a bowl of soup as an appetizer.
-而不是一杯 -查克
- Not a cup. - Chuck--
我知道人们说我会喝个水饱
I know. People say I'll fill up,
但你们根本不知道
but you have no idea
我的胃对汤的超强消化能力
how my body processes soup.
好吧文德尔森
Okay, Wendelson,
答案就在这里你有一整天的时间来找
the answer is in here and you have all day to find it.
好吧一页一页地看
Okay. Take it one page at a time.
看完了
There you go.
也没那么难嘛
That was not so bad.
什么