平凡的乔（2023）

Average Joe S01E09

Part 1 Aug. 25, 2023, 12:14 p.m.

这就是你惹钉子人得到的。
That's what you get for messing with the Nail Man.
告诉你的妻子西格妮·海狸,
And tell your wife, Sigourney Beaver,
我会在8:00左右结束。
I'll be over around 8:00.
你结婚了？
And you're married?
哇,慢点,兰布罗。
Whoa, slow down, Rambro.
哎呀,别偷偷摸摸钉子人了。
Ay, don't be sneakin' up on the Nail Man.
邮递员到底是谁？
Who the hell is the Mail Man?
我是。这是带有N的钉子人。
I am. And it's Nail Man with an N.
听起来像“邮递员”。 - 嗯,不是。
Sounds like "Mail Man." - Well, it's not.
是美甲人。 - 是的,我知道,
It's Nail Man. - Yeah, I know,
但这听起来像“邮件”。
but it sounds like "mail."
好的,邮递员送邮件。
Okay, a mailman delivers the mail.
我拯救死亡。
I deliver death.
你完成了？- 是的,我想是的。
You done? - Yeah, I guess so.
那么是什么让你来到这里？
So what brings you down here?
好吧,我刚刚和我的流行音乐共进午餐。
Well, I just had lunch with my pops.
你和泰迪一起吃午饭？
You had lunch with Teddy?
是什么带来了这种狗屎？
What brought that shit on?
他打电♥话♥问。
He called and asked.
说他想见我。
Said he wanted to see me.
想见你吗？- 嗯嗯。
Wanted to see you? - Mm-hmm.
妈的,他快死了吗？他得了癌症吗？
Shit, is he dying? Does he have cancer?
他没有癌症,
He doesn't have cancer,
这是一些搞砸的狗屎。
and that's some fucked-up shit to say.
为什么这么说呢？- 好吧,对不起,好吗？
Why would you say that? - Well, I'm sorry, okay?
你♥爸♥爸多久要求和你一起出去玩一次？
How often does your dad ask to hang out with you?
从不。- 我的意思是。
Never. - My point exactly.
那么他说了什么呢？你们谈了什么？
So what did he say? What did you guys talk about?
没什么,谈论詹恩进入卡内基,
Nothing, talked about Jenn getting into Carnegie,
呃,安格,她怎么样了。
uh, Ange, how she's doing.
然后他拥抱了我,付了帐,离开了。
Then he hugged me and paid the bill and left.
泰迪身体触摸了你？
Teddy physically touched you?
奇怪,真的很奇怪。- 嗯嗯。
Weird, real weird. - Mm-hmm.
就像他几乎想告诉我什么,
It's like he almost wanted to tell me something,
然后他就是没有。
then he just didn't.
这是他妈的癌症。
It's fucking cancer.
这不是他妈的癌症。你为什么保持——
It's not fucking cancer. Why you keep--
我--我不知道,伙计。嗯,看。
I--I don't know, man. Well, look.
也许我只是在这里吐槽,
Maybe I'm just spitballing here,
但也许他有第二个家庭。
but maybe he has a second family.
什么？
A what?
第二个家庭。
A second family.
猫和我,我们在看,呃,
Cat and I, we were watching, uh,
其中一个犯罪节目,它以这个家伙为特色
one of those crime shows, and it featured this guy
有两个独♥立♥的家庭,
that had two separate families,
一个在塔尔萨,另一个在德卢斯。
one in Tulsa, the other in Duluth.
他最终杀死了家庭两边的所有人。
He wound up killing everybody in both sides of the family.
所以你认为我父亲有两个家庭
So you think my father has two families
还想向我承认他是连环杀手？
and wants to admit to me that he's a serial killer?
或。只是说。这是一件很难的事情
Maybe. Just saying. That's a hard thing
和你儿子谈谈。
to talk about with your son.
莱昂,你是一个奇怪的混♥蛋♥。
Leon, you are one strange motherfucker.
奇怪,是的。
Strange, yes.
男孩需要祈祷。
Boy need prayer.
这些混♥蛋♥不会把詹恩带到任何地方。
These motherfuckers ain't taking Jenn anywhere.
移♥动♥,我会吹
Move and I'll blow
你♥他♥妈♥的脑子出来了。
your fucking brains out.
举起手来。
Hands up.
慢慢地转过身来。
Turn around, slowly.
家里有几个男人？
How many men are in the house?
英语,混♥蛋♥。
English, motherfucker.
家里有几个男人？
How many men are in the house?
有什么好笑的？
What's so funny?
你,愚蠢。
You, stupid.
不知道枪上的安全性。
Don't know safety on gun.
想做一些伊万德拉戈,阿波罗信条狗屎吗？
Wanna do some Ivan Drago, Apollo Creed shit?
我们走吧。
Let's go.
德拉戈杀死阿波罗,就像我杀死你一样。
Drago kill Apollo, just like I kill you.
现在不好笑吧？
Not funny now, huh?
我告诉你我杀了你。
I tell you I kill you.
你打得像个婊♥子♥。
You hit like a bitch.
那更好。
That was better.
是的,没错。
Yeah, that's right.
我不惹这个狗屎。
I don't mess with this shit.
我要杀了你！[咕噜咕噜]
I'm gonna kill you! [grunts]
不要惹钉子人。
Don't mess with the Nail Man.
你要做什么？
What you gonna do?
打我。
Hit me.
嗯,好吧。
Mm, all right.
他妈的。
Fuck.
你把这事说得太容易了,托尼。
You making this too easy, Tony.
好吧,再来一次,安琪。
All right, one more time, Angie.
双倍或什么都没有。-什么？
Double or nothing. - What?
我认为你买♥♥不起。
I don't think you can afford it.
我失望了多少？
How much am I down?
120万。
1.2 million.
该死的,1.2。
Damn, 1.2.
你接受支票？- 从你？地狱没有。
You take checks? - From you? Hell no.
好冷。
That's cold.
我告诉你什么。
I tell you what.
如果你给我倒一杯水...
If you pour me a glass of water...
那我就,嗯——
Then I will, um--
我会和你谈判。
I'll negotiate with you.
好吧,打赌。
All right, bet.
嗯,那你为什么在这里？
Um, so why are you here?
不,我不想进入所有这些。
Nah, I ain't trying to get into all that.
哦,你想说什么,我多管闲事还是什么？
Oh, what you trying to say, I'm nosy or something?
好吧,你知道吗？
Okay, you know what?
然后我现在想要我的120万大额帐单。
Then I want my 1.2 million now in large bills, right now.
谢谢。
Thank you very much.
这就是你谈判的方式-- -嗯嗯。
So that's how you negotiate-- - Mm-hmm.
无情。
Ruthless.
呜呜......所以我被枪杀了。
A'ight... so I got shot.
你被枪杀了？
You got shot?
由谁？
By who?
我老婆。
My wife.
直接朝我的屁♥股♥开枪。
Shot me right in the ass.
你老婆朝你的屁♥股♥开枪？
Your wife shot you in the ass?
这不是什么吗？-为什么？
Ain't that something? - Why?
我,呃--
I, uh--
我搞砸了。
I fucked up.
你的意思是,你搞砸了？
What you mean, you fucked up?
你知道,我一天做过一些真正的暴徒。
You know, I've done some real thug shit in my day.
不,新卡。
Nah, new cards.
我还没有为这一切做好准备。
I ain't ready for all this.
哦,来吧,托尼。- 新卡。
Oh, come on, Tony. - New cards.
不,来吧。
Nah, come on.
我能感觉到它从你身上下来。
I can feel it coming off you.
你需要和某人谈谈。
You need to talk to somebody.
加油。
Come on.
跟我说说你老婆的事吧。
Tell me about your wife.
她是那些骑车或死亡的人之一
She was one of those ride-or-dies
你不配。
that you don't deserve.
而不是应付那个狗屎
Instead of copping to that shit
并欣赏她这个女人...
and appreciating the woman she is...
你搞砸了。
you fuck it up.
然后你做了一些你无法收回的愚蠢事情
And then you do some dumb shit you can't take back
都只是为了什么,
all just to what,
让你更容易走开？
make it easier for you to walk away?
但那一刻——你走开的那一刻是
But the moment-- the moment you walk away is