恐怖幽灵

我觉得你真的没必要...
I really don't think that you should...
拜托一下嘛
Come on, honey.
我好像有点寂寞喔
I think Tiger's getting a little lonely.
猜我今晚做了什么
Guess what I did tonight, honey?
我在石中剑餐厅订了位
I made reservations at Excalibur.
宝贝 你不记得了
Don't you remember, sweetheart?
这个星期二是我们的周年纪念
It's our anniversary this Tuesday.
我还订了我们最喜欢的位置
I even got our favorite table.
不错吧 小呆呆
Yeah? You silly-willy?
这怎么会在这儿
What the hell is this doing here?
我明明就撕掉了
I thought I tore this up.
-他有回到家里来吗 -谁
-Did he come back to the house? -Who?
把我们围篱撞烂了的那个蠢蛋
That moron that tore up my fence!
救救我啊 雷 救救我
Help! Ray, help.
他是活的
He's alive.
雷
Ray!
雷 救我下来
Ray, get me off!
你这个变♥态♥
You sick thing!
露西 我不要那骗子上门
Lucy, I don't want that con man in my house.
一定有什么合理的解释吧
There's gotta be some kind of rational explanation for all this.
我可不想听那个通灵蠢蛋的话
I just don't want some goddamn spoon bender telling me what to do.
雷 我们家里有捣蛋鬼
Ray, we have got a poltergeist!
警♥察♥一定能够摆平
Well, it's nothing that the police can't handle.
我是班尼斯特
Bannister.
林斯基医生 我马上过去
Dr. Lynskey, I'm on my way.
灵魂到访过的痕迹 每年这时都有这种问题
Persistent residue of the departed. Always a problem this time of year.
林斯基医生
Dr. Lynskey?
-谢谢你抽空过来 -这...
-Yes. Thank you for coming. -The...
问题到底出在哪里
The activity is currently located where?
嗯 我也不知道 5分钟前才安静下来
Well, I don't know. It just went quiet about five minutes ago.
安静下来
Went quiet?
餐桌是不是以逆时钟方向转
The dining room table spun in a counterclockwise direction?
好像没有吧
I don't think that one happened. No.
马桶盖有没有上下翻动
The toilet seat lid banged up and down?
没有
No.
-床有没有飞起来 -有 我当时还在床上
-Did the bed levitate? -Yeah, with me on it.
无意识的意志力 喔 天哪
Spontaneous recurrent psychokinesis. Oh, boy.
这可能是我看过最糟的一件案子
This could be the worst case I've ever seen.
真的很糟糕
Yeah, this is bad.
好 各位 我可以帮你们赶鬼...
Okay. Well, folks, I can do a clearance...
不过费用可能会有点贵
but it's not gonna be cheap.
不过我可以提供6个月的保证
Although I do offer a six-month guarantee.
多少
How much?
249元9毛5
$249.95.
不过午夜后的服务费用要再追加三成
But there is a 30% surcharge for making a house call after midnight.
还有车费 油资...
Then there's vehicle, gas...
所以总共的花费...
so I'd say the whole thing is gonna set you back...
大约是450元
somewhere in the neighborhood of $450.
不过可用你们前院的围篱来做抵销
Although we could forget about the fence, call the whole thing even.
快点啦
Do it.
好 不好意思 小姐 请后退一点
Okay. Excuse me, ma'am. You wanna stand back.
不想让你签弃权证书
I don't want you to have to sign a waiver.
外加1百元的材料费 我不能贴自己的钱吧
Plus $100 for materials. I can't be out of pocket.
班尼斯特 动作快一点
Just do it, for Christ's sakes, Bannister.
好了
Here we go.
好
All righty.
为什么是我们 他们为什么在我们家
Why us? I mean, why are they in our house?
虽然鬼魂通常都在墓园里...
All I can tell you is emanations are normally confined to the cemetery...
不过他们会逃跑
although they do escape.
通常都是年轻的鬼魂
It's usually the young ones.
拜托你 班尼斯特
For God's sakes, Bannister, come on.
快一点
Come on.
这是圣水
It's holy water.
这简直是狗屁 根本就是狗屁
This is bullshit. This is total bullshit.
快点 太好了
Come on. Yes!
这些是你们的
Okay, these belong to you.
抓到6个鬼魂
Six ectoplasmic emanations.
别担心 他们不会逃走
Don't worry. They can't escape.
有些人喜欢纪念品 想要我放在哪儿
Some people like a souvenir. Where would you like me to put them?
不了 我们不需要留下做纪念
No. I really don't think we wanna hang onto those.
谢谢你
So, thank you.
-需要吗 -我才懒得管
-Do we, hon? -I could give a rat's ass.
好
Okay.
别担心 他们没知觉
Don't worry, they can't feel a thing.
起码书上是这样写
At least that's what it says in the book.
不过也不是绝对的
You never really know for sure.
好 谢谢你 班尼斯特 你可以走了
All right. Thank you, Bannister. You can go.
你在看什么看
What the hell are you staring at?
怎么会有号♥码
What's with the number?
什么号♥码
What number?
要是你想吓我 一点用也没有
Look, if you're trying to freak me out, it's not gonna work, okay?
你知道他想干嘛吗
You know what he's trying to do?
他只想骗我们的钱
He's trying to get more money out of us is what he's trying to do.
快点把你的东西拿走 给我滚出去
Here, take your shit and get the hell out of my house.
快点
Come on.
-快点 -雷 你...
-Move. -Ray, just...
真是谢谢你
Thank you so much.
-拿去吧 -谢了
-There you go. -Thanks.
谢谢你
Thank you.
你干嘛每次都这样对别人
Why do you always have to alienate everybody?
我好像要吐了
I think I'm going to throw up.
糟糕
Damn.
老兄 那车厢有够烂
Man, I hate that trunk!
我知道 我可不想让你们...
Yeah, I don't want you guys spreading your ectoplasmic muck...
把我的车弄脏
all over my car seats.
真是太为难你了 要不是因为我们...
Ain't that a bitch. The ectoplasm's the only thing sticky enough...
你的车早就散了
to hold the damn car together.
法兰克 我知道你的车很烂...
Look, Frank, I'm sorry about your pus yellow, piece-of-shit Volvo...
不过我们拒绝坐在车厢里 听到了没
but we ain't riding in the damn trunk no more, you understand?
我们想时髦一点
We would like to cruise with some style, man.
你们今晚根本没帮我
You know, you guys left me high and dry tonight.
我到他们家的时候 什么事也没发生
I get to the house, nothing's happening.
不可思议
I couldn't believe it.
史都华 你到底想怎样
Stuart, in or out?
你们连马桶盖都没碰
You guys didn't even bang the toilet seat lid?
让我糗死了
You made me look like an asshole.
法兰克 我们抬床的时候 还扭到腰
We strained our backs lifting that heavy ass bed, Frank.
还有 是哪个白♥痴♥...
Yeah. Who was the idiot...
在他的头上写数字
who put the number in the guy's forehead?
一点也不好笑
It wasn't funny.
快点做工...
Start pulling your weight, guys...
不然就送你们回墓园
or you're going back to the cemetery.
法兰克 你最好想一想
Yeah, well, you can pull this, Frank.
我准备要跟你算帐
I'm about to go like Jesse on your ass.
我要去找其他的黑人鬼魂...
I'm gonna find me some other black ghosts...
然后举办一场大游♥行♥
and then organize a march.
非裔美籍幽灵联盟
The African American Apparition Coalition.
简称非美幽盟
The AAAC.
法兰克 你给我听好
And I'm gonna tell you something, Frank!
一群不爽的死黑人...
There ain't nothing worse than a bunch of pissed off brothers...
是很恐怖的
that's already dead!
可以帮我一下吗
Would someone help me, please?
史都华 放轻松一点 我是说真的
Stu, man, you got to loosen up, man. I'm serious.
来 放轻松
Come on, Stu, loosen up.
放轻松点 听到没
Loosen up. Okay, you loose? All right.
神经不要那么紧绷嘛
So tight you can you play pick-up sticks with your butt cheeks.
放轻松 让自己变成微粒物体
Loosen up. Just particlise. There you go.
哇靠
Damn.
他根本就在占我们的便宜
That fellow takes us totally for granted.
我们应该是他的工作同仁
And we're supposed to be his business partners.