26种新死法（2014）

不好意思……
I'm sorry...
嗨，迪伦
Hi, Dylan...
嗨，安波
Hi, Amber!
哥们，我跟你说了我在打电♥话♥……老兄等会，就一会……
Dude, I told you I'm on the phone,man... One second, one second...
好吧
Okay...
你们住在哪儿？给我看看你们的房♥间
Where are you guys staying?Show me your room!
呃，说实话，现在有点乱，你……是不会想看的……
Ah, honestly, it's a mess right now,you wouldn't... want to see it...
你想看我们的房♥间？
You want to see our room?
当然，给我来个全景
Yeah, give me the tour!
宝贝，我等会再打给你……
Baby, I'm going to call you back...
给她一个全景啊，伙计！
Let's give her a tour, man!
我靠，干嘛！快把电♥话♥给我！
Yo, what the fuck!Give me the phone! Dude!
把电♥话♥还我，给我……我♥操♥！
Give me my phone, give...give me... fuck!
- 宝贝儿，挂掉！
- 亲爱的，过的咋样？
- Baby, hang up...
- Hey baby, how you doin'?
迪伦，你在干嘛？
Dylan, what are you doing?
- 亲爱的！
- 嘿，嘘，别担心！
- Baby!
- Hey, shhh, don't worry!
喔喔喔，看看，这是什么？
Ohhh, look at that, what's that?
- 这是什么？
- 这是什么？
- What is that?
- What's that?
是毒品？
Are those hard drugs?
猜对了……给你介绍几个我们的小伙伴
Yeaaaah... Introduce you to some of our new friends...
……比如这位美女
...like this sweet little peach.
- 她是谁？
- Who is she?
- 顺便再看看这一位……
- Take a look at that...
- 咋样，你喜欢吗？
- Yeah, you like that?
- 她是谁？
- Who is she?
看那粉♥嫩♥的乳♥头♥
Look at those itty-bitty titties!
还记得你的奶♥子♥原来长啥样吗？我可记得哟
Remember when your titties used to look like that? I do!
操你，迪伦
Fuck you, Dylan.
我来让你看看科特的
Let me show you what Curt got.
不！不！不要看！不要看！
No, no!Look away! Look away!
你知道你男朋友喜欢熟♥女♥的老骚♥逼♥吗？
Did you know your boyfriend likes smelly old pussy?
你知道吗？
Did you know that?
瓦屋！重口味！
Wow! That's strong!
不过，有意思的是……
But, funny story...
如果你同时叫了母女二人作陪……
...you know you get a discount here
价格会便宜点噢
if you do both mother and daughter?
是啊，很变♥态♥
Yeah, it's sick!
等会……
Hold on...
让科特来接电♥话♥！你这变♥态♥！
Put Curt back on the phone!You're disgusting!
等等，那个是螺丝刀？
Wait, is that a screwdriver?
这重口味老熟♥女♥昨天用它玩了个小把戏喔……
Smelly mommy did a smelly trick with this last night...
我演示给你看看
Let me show ya.
别听他的！
Don't listen to him!
宝贝儿，别听他的！快挂电♥话♥！
Baby, don't listen to him!Hang up the phone right now!
- 别这样，老兄，淡定！
- No, man, come on!
- 给我电♥话♥！
- Give me the phone!
快挂掉！
Hang out with us!
过来，来，来
C'mere! Here, here, here.
给安波表演个，好么？
Do a show for Amber, okay?
- 快舔
- Suck him off.
- 再操一次不收费
- Fuck again is extra...
- 没问题
- No problem...
- 快停下！安波！
- Stop it! Amber!
这不是我本意，你是知道的
This is not me, and you know that, ok?
- 说真的，别说了
- Seriously, stop it.
- 我到现在为止都不清楚发生了什么！
- I don't know anything right now!
- 我已经不认识你了
- I have no idea who you are!
- 这全是迪伦干的，我发誓
- It's all Dylan, I swear, alright?
我说了停下，你这婊♥子♥！
I said stop it, you fucking whore!
安波？亲爱的？
Amber? Baby?
- 妈♥逼♥啊，哥们！
- Damn, dude!
- 亲爱的？
- Honey?
你还在吗？安波！
Are you still there? Amber!
我们玩完了！
You have lost it!
- 别别别，等下，听我说！
- No no no, wait, just listen to me!
- 你这恶心的变♥态♥！
- You are fucking psycho right now!

不，我要挂了！我受够了！我现在要挂电♥话♥了！
No, I'm hanging up! I'm done!I am hanging up right now!
不不不，听着，我是应该告诉你的！
No no no, look,I should have told you!
都是迪伦干的，我应该跟你说实话的
It was Dylan, alright?I should have told you, okay?
- 但这真的都是迪伦干的！
- But it was all Dylan, alright!
- 你这满嘴谎言的烂仔
- You are so full of shit.
跟他说这都是你干的！
Tell her it was all you!
快他妈说啊！
Fucking tell her!
伙计，跟她说都是你要找这两个女人来的！我什么都没干！
Dude, tell her you fucking brought the girls back! I didn't do anything!
别你妈逗了，这很要命的！
Stop fucking around, man,this is serious shit!
等等……
Wait a second...
老兄，快转身！老兄！操！螺丝刀，哥们！
Bro, turn around! Dude! Fuck!Screwdriver, dude!
转身！伙计！伙计！
Turn around! Dude! Dude!
噢，我♥操♥！
Oh, fuck!
哦哦……我♥操♥！
Oh! Oh my... fuck!
这门打不开！
This fucking door won't open!
停下！停下！
Stop! Stop!
不！我♥操♥！
No! Fuck!
妈♥逼♥，打不开门！
Fucking door won't open!
迪伦！
Dylan!
妈的，我要杀了你，你这婊♥子♥！
Oh, I'm going to fuck you up,bitch!
我要拿螺丝刀
I'm gonna fuckin' stab that screwdriver
捅进你的骚♥逼♥里……
right in your fucking cunt,you fucking...
告诉我他还活着……
Tell me he's okay...
你会讲英语吗？
Do you speak English?
不！！
Noooooo!
V：《假期》
导演：杰罗姆·赛博（代表作：《舞台惊魂》）
“泽伯之冠”！
Champions of Zorb.
哈尔莫尼亚正遭攻击
Harmonia is under attack.
勇猛善战的“卡西欧王子”最终会遇到他的宿敌吗？
Has the heroic Prince Casio finally met his match?
谁敢挑战“邪恶灵王泽伯”？
Who dares challenge the evil Mindlord Zorb?
别担心，“依然范特西”会来救你的
Don't worry,Fantasy Man will save you.
“依然范特西”可以帮你恐吓敌人
Terrify your opponents with the mighty Fantasy Man.
- 真心希望我们能帮助大表哥
- I wish we could help Prince Casio.
- 杜昂！
- Yeah!
现在你们可以探索泽伯之界了
Now you can explore the world of Zorb.
我们在哪儿？
Where are we?
大！表！哥！
Prince Casio!
操蛋！我们要团灭了！
We're dead! We're all fucking dead!
狗~命~啊！
Help me!
不！不要！
No! No!
谋！谋！谋啊！
No. No. No!
啥？
What?
不要害怕，殿下
Don't be scared, Princess.
是我
It's me...
依然范特西
Fantasy Man.
睡吧，粪哥，我的老盆友
Sleep, Fungor.My old friend.
快点，殿下，快到袋里来
Quickly, Princess, into the sack.
没时间了！
There's no time!
快点，快钻进袋子里！
Quickly, into the sack!
咱们要去哪儿？
Where are we going?
就快到了，殿下
Almost there, Princess...
我们就快到了
We're almost there.
不，不，不！
No, no, no!
W：《愿望》
导演：斯蒂文·克斯坦斯基（代表作：《父亲节》，《生化人》）
X：《木琴》
导演：朱利安·莫利和亚历山大·布斯蒂罗（代表作：《身在其中》，《死色》）
爸爸
不
武田先生
还记得我的太郎吗？
我最爱的狗狗
如果当初你好好地照看他
他现在一定还活得好好的
一星期的照看而已
这都不能好好照顾他
太郎在你来之前就已经是我们家庭的一员了
工作工作，你可是在家不用出门的工作啊