26种新死法（2014）

Very well. I killed Lucy.
我把她的尸体沉在了爱丁顿江上游的肯尼特河里
I dumped her body in the River Kennet beyond Eddington.
这就是你们想要的结果，这就是我的供认
There you go. There's my confession,
-现在报♥警♥吧！
-now call the Police!
-滚你♥他♥妈♥的臭傻♥逼♥！
-You fucking shit!
报♥警♥啊！是你们说的！你们保证过的！
Call the Police.You said! You promised!
你们都听到他说的了！
You all heard him!
你们都可以作证！
You all bore witness!
你将被本庭带到刑场
You shall be taken from this court to the place of execution,
斩立决
with no further delay.
今天午饭时间的头条新闻
The main headlines this lunchtime...
失踪超过一个月且被认为已经遇难的露西·威尔逊
Lucy Wilson, missing for over a month and presumed dead,
在东约克郡被发现，且安然无恙
has been found alive and well in East Yorkshire.
这位14岁的小姑娘和她26岁的男朋友私奔
The fourteen year old had run away with her 26 year-old boyfriend,
目前其男友已被当局控制
who has been arrested by local authorities.
大家听我说！她还活着，露西还活着！新闻报道了！
Hey guys, she's alive. Lucy's alive!It's all over the news!
快点，挂五档！
Come on, faster!
怎么着？你们打算把我像不会说话的动物一样射倒吗？
So this it? You're just gonna shoot me down like some dumb animal?
大哥我错了，别杀我，大哥，我求求你了！大哥
Oh Jesus Christ, no, please!
不要啊！
Don't do this!
神父，你劝劝他们吧！我求你了！
Father, don't let them do this...
please!
亲爱的道友，全真的上帝以其公正之名
Dearly beloved,it hath pleased Almighty God
对你进行审判
in His justice,to bring you under sentence -
并以法律之名定罪
and condemnation of the law...
把他按倒
Hold him down.
你们不能...求求你们，你们不能杀我！
You can't...please, you can't kill me!
神父，让他们住手！
Father, please stop!
你将如此被执行死刑
You are to suffer death in such a manner
他人将因你的死亡而受到警示
that others,warned by your example
或将更加害怕犯罪
may be the more afraid to offend.
噢！卧♥槽♥！
Oh, fuck!
他♥娘♥的♥托比亚斯，你砍得不够劲！
What the fuck Tobias,you didn't hit him hard enough!
我他♥娘♥的♥给他来个透心凉，看招！
I'll hit him a-fucking-gain then,won't I!
我♥操♥你妈，你差点把我手指头剁掉！
Oh fucking hell,you nearly took my fingers off!
那你♥他♥妈♥就站远点！
Well fucking move back then!
恪守礼仪，小伙子们！给他应有的尊严！
Decorum, boys!Give this man his dignity!
神父，闭上你的破嘴！
Father, shut the fuck up!
看在上帝的份上，结束这一切吧！
For the love of God, finish this!
补刀
Finish him off.
我们在此祈祷，上帝
And we pray, God,that you may make such use
您施加惩罚到人间，并拯救他的灵魂
of your punishments in this world that your soul may be saved
-让来世洗清罪恶
-in the world to come.
-你拿到一血了
-You're blooded now.
露西·威尔逊，失踪超过一个月并被认为已遇难...
Lucy Wilson missing for over a month and presumed dead...
我没有杀她！
I did not kill her!
C:《死刑》
导演：朱利安·吉尔比（代笔作：《孤独的死亡之所》）
欢迎回来
Welcome back.
看起来不错
Looking good.
生命归你了
Life is yours.
现在你得偿还我
Now you must pay me.
为新生命做出偿还
You pay for life.
为新生命做出偿还
You pay for life.
为新生命做出偿还
You pay for life.
为新生命做出偿还
You pay for life.
D：《驱除》
导演：罗伯特·摩根
“倒酒”
E：《均衡》
导演：亚历桑德罗·布鲁格斯（代表作：《僵尸胡安》）
请不要...
闭上你的臭嘴！
闭上你的臭嘴！
去吧，你去叫人吧，你去吧
我会去的！你给我闭嘴！
抱歉...
我以为你想集万千“太黑啦”于一身
“太黑啦”是什么鬼？
荣耀
那你就说“抢人头”嘛
你啥意思？
如果你开枪的话
你的朋友们就会过来
抢走你俘虏“以色列婊♥子♥”的功劳
你叫什么名字？
没名字！
那我给你起个名字吧
穆♥罕♥默♥德♥
老土
与其被他们抢功劳
不如自己爬上树来
割掉绳子，押送我去村庄
莫非你怕高？
我才不怕高，你这以色列婊♥子♥！
证明给我看
我可是从飞机上跳下来的
让我看看你怎么爬树
如果这就是你跳伞水平
我看你顶多也就是个烧菜的厨子
瞧着，谁怕谁啊
你笑什么？
我又不会把你放了
我急着想尿尿
女人
你不知道怎么憋尿吗？
别尿到裤子里去了...
F：坠落
导演：亚伦·凯沙莱斯和纳沃特·帕普沙多（代表作：《大坏狼》）
你确定这是干邑白兰地？
Are you sure this is Cognac?
喝起来跟超♥市♥卖♥♥的便宜货一样
Tastes more like supermarket cooking brandy.
相信我，这是好酒
Trust me, it's the good stuff.
我不知道怎么说，爷爷
Yeah, I don't know, Granddad.
我感觉我的尿都比这好喝
I've done wee-wees tastier than this.
这...是...好...酒
It's... the... good... stuff.
噁！
Yuck!
你应该在这儿安个电视机
You could've got a TV in here.
我说过了，我不喜欢看电视
I've told you, I don't like telly.
搞台小的也行
Well, just get a small one then.
这儿就像五十年代一样
It's like being in the 1950s in here.
哦，你听说过五十年代的堕落事情吗？
Oh, have you heard something rotten about the 1950s?
看看你，我可爱的小孙子
Look at you,my lovely little grandson.
不再是以前的小孩子了
Not so little these days.
内啥，这也太尴尬了吧
Hello, this is embarrassing.
是的...
Right...
娘的，老夫得上♥床♥去了
I'm fucking off to bed.
哦？这条项链？嗯，这是纯金的
Oh? This necklace?Yeah, it is real gold.
挂在你的奶头上更漂亮，亲爱的
Would look even better hanging off your tit, love.
我绝对会灰常灰常喜欢的
And I am absolutely loving it.
“我可爱的小孙子”
"My lovely little grandson".
真娘炮！
What a twat!
你就是娘炮，兄弟
You're the twat, mate.
谁叫我娘炮？
Who called me a twat?
-哈啊？
-Ahh?
-哈啊，娘炮
-Ahh, twat.
哎哟我♥操♥！
Ahh, shit!
哎哟我♥操♥，娘炮
Ahh, shit, twat.
啊？！你在这儿干什么？
What are you doing in there?
噢，我每晚都在这儿
Oh, I'm here every night
你搞的我整晚都睡不着觉
and you keep me awake all night.
一直在那打飞机放屁，娘炮同志！
With your wanking and your farting.
Twat!
你想变的和我一样？
Are you trying to look like me?
是的，没关系吧？
Yes, is that alright?
-你手指头上是什么？
-What have you got on your finger?
-我在乍得搞到的
-I got this in Chad.
用来翘贝壳用的
It's for opening mollusks -
我爱屎它了
and I'm absolutely loving it.
嘿，这句是我的口头禅！
Hey, that's my catch phrase.
你脑子有毛病吧，爷爷？
What is your fucking problem,Granddad?
你就是毛病所在
You are my fucking problem.
你跟我在一起住整整一年了
You've been staying with me for a whole year now
你在挑战我的极限
and you're cramping my style.
我听你在电♥话♥里老说我是撸管狂魔
I heard you, on the phone calling me a wanker.
我？撸管狂魔？你不知道这话让我多难受
Me, a wanker.You don't know how that hurts.
瞧！你给我翻译翻译，我他妈的拿什么撸？！
Look, can you see anything that I could wank with?
雷港啊！你倒是翻译翻译啊！
Can you? Can you? Can you?
说啊！
Can you?
G：《爷爷》
导演：吉姆·霍斯金
H：《脑洞大开》
导演：比尔·普莱姆顿（代表作：《变种外星人》，《我嫁了个怪蜀黍》，《很黄很暴♥力♥》）
妈！蛋！
Ma! Die!
我们都他♥娘♥的♥老了！
We're fucking old!
把钱给我们！
Give us our money!
死吧！烂货！
Die, bitch!