撕裂时间（2022）

本节目为G级
This program is rated G
适合所有年龄段观看
and is suitable for general audiences.
亨利?
Henry?
亨利!
Henry!
嘿，爸爸，你看见亨利了吗?
Hey, Dad, have you seen Henry?
我在这里!
I'm here!
我在地里拔藜草，
I'm getting the pigweed out of the ground,
就像你说的!
like you said!
你连根都拔了，对吧?
You're pulling up the root, too, right?
是的，我把根都拔了。你可知道？我六岁啦！
Yeah, I'm getting the roots. What am I, six?
好!现在去厨房♥
Good! Now go grab me
帮我拿一大罐硬币，好吗？
that big jar of pennies from the kitchen, okay?
把你的脏脚擦干净!
And wipe your muddy feet!
已经擦干净了!
He wiped his feet!
好了，我要你拿着这些硬币
Okay, I want you to take these pennies
把它们排好……就像这样。
and line them up... just like this.
——好吧?——好的
- All right? - 'Kay.
我们需要绕着花椰菜，
We need to go all the way around the broccoli,
洋葱，卷心菜和西红柿一圈，好吗?
the onions, the cabbages, and the tomatoes, okay?
就这事?
The whole thing?
“就这事”
"The whole thing."
你想知道一个秘密吗?
You wanna know a secret?
这些不是蔬菜……
These are not vegetables...
它们是太空舱。
they're space pods.
——什么?-哦,是的。
- What? - Oh, yeah.
拜托
Please.
小小的宇航员
The tiny astronauts
殖民了这片区域
that colonized this area,
他们建造这个。
they built them.
但现在……
But now...
他们的殖民地受到了这些可怕的太空怪物的攻击…
their colony is under attack by these hideous space monsters...
啊。
Ugh.
——喔。——所以……
- Ew. - So...
这是你拯救世界的唯一方法
the only way for you to save the day
就是拿着这些...微电子转换器
is to take these... microelectron converters
在殖民地周围形成一个力场
and form a force-field all the way around the colony.
饶了我吧。
Give me a break.
事实上，如果你想知道真♥相♥，
Actually, if you want to know the truth,
就是鼻涕虫中的化学物质与硬币中的铜发生反应，
the chemicals in slugs react to the copper in pennies,
让他们远离这。
and it keeps them away.
你觉得我像个孩子吗?
Do I look like a child to you?
嗯，我想不是。
Well, I guess not.
嘿。
Hey.
晚饭在高压锅里。
Dinner's in the pressure cooker.
还要20分钟，好吗?
20 minutes, all right?
好吧。
Okay.
他受够了太空入侵者
He's done with the Space Invaders,
然后是翼手龙。
and went on to the pterodactyls.
翼手龙吗?
Pterodactyls?
鸡舍。
Chicken coop.
哦。对的
Oh. Right.
我不记得你这么快就长大了。
I don't remember you being this quick to grow up.
看来你觉得我还是小孩
Sign of the times.
这是什么?需要帮忙吗?
What's this? You need some help?
刚接的新订单
Fresh Rite order.
不,我做好了
Nope, I'm done.
好了，我去洗下手。
All right, I'm gonna wash up.
很好
Sounds good.
不用挤，女士们。
No need to shove, ladies.
哇!
Whoa!
求你了……
Please...
我手无寸铁。
I'm unarmed.
你是强盗吗?
Are you a robber?
不。
No.
我向你保证，我是个正直的人。
I assure you, I'm a man of honor.
妈妈!
Mom!
妈妈!
Mom!
亨利。
Henry.
哦,对不起。
Oh, sorry.
妈妈?
Mom?
——是吗?-你知道我们该怎么把
- Yeah? - You know how we're supposed
动物挡在谷仓外面?
to keep critters out of the barn?
是的。
Yes.
但如果是人呢?
But what if the critter's a man?
有个人在谷仓里吃萝卜。
There's a guy eating turnips in the barn.
我想他无家可归。
I think he's homeless.
什么?
What?
他说他不是坏人。
He said he's not a bad guy.
你和他说话过?
You spoke to him?
只说了一点点。
Only a little.
哦。爸爸!
Oh. Dad!
谁在这里?我有枪!
Who's in here? I've got a gun!
不，请不要。我投降！
No, please. I yield!
你是怎么做到的?你是女巫吗?
How did you do that? Are you a witch?
她是的，去年万圣节。
She was, last Halloween.
亨利!我叫你待在里面的。
Henry! I told you to stay inside.
请不要杀我，女巫。
Please do not shoot me, witch.
继续这么叫我。给我个理由
Keep calling me that. Give me a reason.
你在我的谷仓里干什么?
What are you doing in my barn?
我很抱歉。我…也很困惑
I'm sorry. I... seem to have confused things.
我撞到头
I've hit my head.
那是在你抢戏服店之前还是之后?
Was that before or after you robbed a costume shop?
我可以和你丈夫谈谈吗?
I wonder, may I speak with your husband?
-不，不行。——他走了。
- No, you can't. - He's gone.
——亨利。——哦。
- Henry. - Oh.
节哀顺变
My condolences.
不需要！
Keep 'em.
哦，你是个老姑娘!
Oh, you're a spinster!
被迫穿裤子，看起来像个男人
Forced to wear pants and look mannish,
来保护你的家人？
to protect your family?
好了，现在你好离开了。
Okay, now you're pushing it.
我希望你不会生气吧?
I pray you are not offended?
不要再靠近了!
Do not come any closer!
我不是老姑娘，我很生气。
I am not a spinster and I am offended.
去找外公。去!
Go get Grandpa. Go!
把你一个人留在这里?
And leave you here alone?
亨利,快去!
Henry, now!
你和你父亲住在一起?
You live with your father?
我的错
My mistake.
不要再靠近了。
Do not move any closer.
爸爸!
Dad!
呆在这里。别动。
Stay right there. Don't move.
无心之过
Honest mistake.
你穿裤子了。
You have pants on.
爸爸?
Dad?
你没听见吗?
Didn't you hear me?
听到什么?
Hear what?
我正在叫你。晚饭准备好了。
I was calling you. Dinner's ready.
谷仓里有个流浪汉。
There's a homeless guy in the barn.
什么?
What?
你为什么不告诉我?
Why didn't you tell me?
他好像有点不太对劲。我想他撞到头了。
He seems a little off. I think he hit his head.
枪上膛了吗?
Is that gun loaded?
不，我没有时间。
No, I didn't have time.
我认为他不造成伤害
But I think he's harmless.
我想我需要一个急救箱。
I think I need a first-aid kit.
这太酷了。
This is so cool.
我们最好把泰德叫出来。
We'd better get Ted out here.
真的吗?
Really?
我想他只是迷惘糊涂了
I think he's just lost and confused.