狩猎季节（2012）

That was gonna be my next question.
我是打算问这个的
So, what do you like to talk about?
那你想聊些什么呢
I don't know. Do you watch Scandal?
不知道 你看《丑闻》吗
I don't actually own a TV.
我家没电视
Come on. But you have a computer, right?
拜托 电脑你总是有的吧
I hate when people say that,
我讨厌别人说自己没电视
it's like they wouldn't dare stoop to owning a television
就好像他们不愿向电视屈服
but of course they all secretly binge on Netflix on their computers.
但私底下谁不在电脑上看网飞啊
Well, yes, I am in a serious relationship with my Netflix
好吧 我是和我的网飞 我的沙发
and my couch and my Chinese delivery guy. So back off.
我的中餐外卖♥♥小哥感情颇深 你可以闭嘴了
I'm impressed you can make it work.
你竟然能活下来
I seem to have a hard time staying faithful
我反正没办法
to just one Chinese take out place.
只点一家中餐外卖♥♥
Gentlemen, we have some specials tonight.
先生们 我们今晚有特色菜
We are featuring half a lamb's head,
我们主推半只羊头
a pig's foot for two with braised ramps
双人份猪蹄 配有炖野韭菜
and a whole roasted chicken with a ramp and kale slaw.
更有整只烤鸡 配野韭菜甘蓝沙拉
Did you say a lamb's head?
你刚刚是说的羊头吗
Yeah, it is the cheek and the brain and it is served on toast.
是的 羊脸羊脑 下面是吐司
Oh, and we are out of the burger.
对了 我们汉堡卖♥♥完了
I'm gonna need a minute. Okay.
让我考虑一下 好
Thanks. Are you kidding me?
谢谢 这是在逗我吧
Sometimes I feel like the restaurant scene
有时候我觉得这些餐厅
has gone over the edge of a cliff.
简直是脑洞深似海
I mean, who eats this shit?
谁会吃这种狗屎
This is one of my favorite spots in the city.
这是我最喜欢的餐厅之一
You're gonna love it.
你一定会喜欢的
Hi.
我回来了
How was your day? Really great, how was yours?
你今天过得咋样 挺好的 你呢
Fine.
还行吧
Did you bring home the scanner?
你把扫描仪带回来了没
Oh, honey, I'm sorry, it slipped my mind.
对不起亲爱的 我给忘了
I'll do it tomorrow.
我明天一定带回来
Are you ready to leave? I need like, ten minutes.
准备好出发了吗 给我十分钟
Okay.
好的
So, I've been going through a serious Russian literature phase.
我最近正认真研读俄♥罗♥斯♥文学
Have you ever read Dostoyevsky?
你读过陀思妥耶夫斯基吗
No. See, I feel like the Russian novel
没有 我觉得俄♥罗♥斯♥小说
really speaks to the current times.
蛮有现代意义的
You know, because there is a lot of similarities...
有很多的相似之处...
This good Alex thing wasn't going very well.
扮演好人亚历克斯 臣妾真做不到
I'm on a date,
我在和人约会
having the most amazing physical chemistry I have ever felt
感受到了前所未有的肉体冲动
but it's with the guy at the next table.
但却是因为隔壁那汉子
That's not something good Alex would do.
好人亚历克斯可不会干这事
Lot of like, what Twitter and you know, Facebook is.
就像推特 脸书那种
You know it's all of us right now.
其实就是我们所有人
Good Alex doesn't see the handsome man in the suit,
好人亚历克斯看不到那个穿西装的帅哥
good Alex stays focused on his date
好人亚历克斯会专心约会
but what if this is the perfect guy for me
但如果西装男才是我的真命天子
and by some twist of fate, some rift in space time,
命运捉弄 时空裂缝什么的
good Alex is supposed to meet him?
好人亚历克斯应该遇到的是他呢
What if I'm Gwyneth Paltrow and he's that British guy
就像格温妮丝·帕特洛和那个英国男人
and I missed him on the subway
而我和他在地铁错过
and this is our last chance.
这是我们最后的机会呢
Surely that can't be bad Alex.
贱♥人♥亚历克斯当然不会这样想的
Maybe good Alex would follow him into the bathroom
或许好人亚历克斯会跟着他去厕所
just to say hello.
打个招呼
The problem isn't that I'm letting bad Alex win,
不是我让贱♥人♥亚历克斯赢了
the problem is knowing which one is which.
而是我能分清好人和贱♥人♥亚历克斯
God, am I boring you?
天哪 我很无聊吗
I can really geek out sometimes. Oh, no. Not at all.
我有时真的挺宅的 才没有
Would you excuse me just a moment?
我能失陪一下吗
I'm so sorry, I just need to use the restroom. Sure.
抱歉 我只是想去趟厕所 当然
You've ruined my date.
你毁了我的约会
I can't take my eyes off you.
我根本移不开视线
We've been eye fucking for the last 45 minutes
我们用眼神大战了四十五分钟
and it is the hottest thing I've ever experienced.
这是我经历过最火♥辣♥的事
What the hell is going on? Fate.
到底是怎么回事 命运
Jesus. What is that? You like it?
天哪 那是什么 喜欢吗
It's the biggest dick I've ever...
那是我见过的最大的屌♥
Are you okay?
你还好吗
I'm sorry. Don't be.
对不起 别道歉
Although you are the first person to almost pass out
虽然你是第一个它还没插♥进♥去
without even taking it... I got fired today.
就快昏过去的人 我今天被解雇了
I'm sorry.
抱歉
I'm a terrible brother, I was a terrible boyfriend
我是个烂弟弟 烂男友
and I'm obviously the world's worst date.
显然还是最烂的约会对象
No, you're just at the wrong table.
不是 你只是约错了人
Can we, can we do this right?
我们能慢慢来吗
I don't even know your name.
我连你叫什么都不知道
Josh. I'm Alex.
乔什 我叫亚历克斯
Next Friday, same time, same table.
下周五 相同时间 相同的桌子
Perfect.
好极了
Are you okay? Yeah.
你没事吧 没事
Good. Get back to your date.
很好 回去继续约会吧
Sorry.
不好意思
Are you okay? You look really flushed.
你没事吧 你的脸好红啊
You know, it's just been a really weird day.
因为今天过得太诡异了
Would you mind if we cut this short?
我们能早点结束吗
Sure. Of course. I'll get the check.
没问题 我去结账
If I couldn't tell good from bad or right from wrong,
要是我没办法辨别好坏是非
how could I do things better?
我怎么才能把事情做好
If there were no rules to dating
如果约会没有规则
and you stopped trusting yourself,
而你又不再相信自己
how are you supposed to behave?
你该怎么表现
Was I following my heart
我是在遵循内心的选择
or was my dick pulling the rest of me along?
还是让精虫牵着鼻子走
And was this intense attraction making me sick to my stomach
让我难受的究竟是无法抵挡的诱惑
or was it just nose-to-tail dining?
还是"从头到尾"的晚饭