疯魔怪（2016）

Ok.
天 我就知道你会回来的
Bam! I just knew you'd come back.
你知道人们常说 好奇害死猫吧
You know what they say about curiosity and cats and...getting killed?
你是谁
Who are you?
我跟你一样 不是说外形上
I'm like you. Well, not physically.
不 我是说 我也跟你一样能看到那些东西
No, what I mean is the things you see, I see them too.
-你并没有疯 -你也能看到吗
- You're not crazy. - You see them too?
-他们是什么东西 -好吧 你准备好了吗
- What are they? - OK, er, you ready for this?
-他们是恶魔 -你真搞笑
- They're demons. - You're hilarious, really.
是啊 我懂的 听着简直像放屁 对吧
Yeah, I know, it sounds like so much bullshit, right?
问题是 你心中有那么一点相信这是真的
The trouble is there's a little part of you that knows it's true,
像啄木鸟或安♥非♥他♥命♥一样 在啄食你的心
jabbing away at you like a...woodpecker or amphetamine.
搞毛 搞毛啊
What?! What?
我们正在谈正事呢 绕过去
We're in the middle of something here. Go round.
绕过去啊 贱♥人♥ 天啊
Drive round, bitch! Oh, my days.
天啊 难以置信 这种司机真没礼貌
God. Believe that? It's so rude.
继续说 他们是恶魔
So, there you go. They're demons.
-那真是太疯狂了 -形势的确很疯狂
- That's insane. - It is definitely out there.
我需要去个地方
Somewhere that I need to be.
你想跟我一起走吗 我们可以聊聊
Do you want to walk with me? We can talk?
昨晚那家伙 你是说他被附身了
The guy from last night... You're saying he's possessed.
他来自哪里
Where did he come from?
地狱 冥府 随你怎么叫吧
Hell, the underworld, whatever you want to call it.
真的是太疯狂了 像这种事是不会发生的
This is totally insane. Stuff like this just doesn't happen.
你知道有时候人会突然发狂吗
You know how sometimes people just suddenly flip out?
变得极度疯狂
Go batshit crazy
杀了全家人 连宠物都不放过
and slaughter their entire families and all their pets?
那都是因为他们被附身了
Well, it's because they're possessed.
-怎么了 -你还问怎么了
- What's up? - What's up?!
这可能有点令你感到震惊
This might come as a shock
但我一时之间真的难以理解这种事
but I'm having some trouble getting my head around this.
你那美丽的小脑袋瓜子最好理解 而且要快
Well, you better get your pretty little head around it, and quick.
你已经暴露在他们的雷达上了
You're on their radar now.
什么雷达 你什么意思
What radar? What do you mean?
我们可以暴露他们
We can expose them.
我和你 会让他们吓得把屎拉在裤裆里
Me and you, we make 'em crap in their panties.
他们怕我们吗
They're scared of us?
从他们出现以来
As long as they've been around,
像我们这种人就一直在猎捕他们
people like us have been hunting them down
把木棍插♥进♥他们的屁♥股♥里
and shoving wooden poles up their arses.
大棍子哦 直接捅进屁♥股♥里
Big pole! Right up their arse.
为什么我们能看到他们
How come we can see them?
我们的大脑构造就是比较独特
It's just how our brains are wired.
只有极少数人有这个能力
There's only a few of us who can.
-你之前在吃药吗 -纳亚克索诺
- Were you on medication? - Niaxarol.
你是怎么知道的
How did you know?
那玩意儿可以让你不再能看到他们
That shit stops you seeing them.
也会让你更难达到高♥潮♥
And it makes it harder for you to orgasm.
你知道儿童游乐场的跷跷板吧
You know the seesaws in the kids playground?
自从我停药后 那东西让我高♥潮♥迭起
Ever since I came off my meds, they make me come really hard.
那些小孩都被吓懵逼了 那是不对的
The look on the kids' faces! It's wrong.
-你跟冷精♥液♥的男人上过床吗 -什么
- You ever slept with a guy with cold semen? - What?
没 我觉得没有 我又不会总是去查这个
No, I don't think so. It's not like I always check.
如果一个男人被附身了 精♥液♥就是冰冷的
If a guy's possessed, their semen's cold.
那可是重大警示信♥号♥♥
Major warning sign.
如果我要测他精♥液♥的温度
If I'm taking the temperature of his semen,
那一切可能也太迟了
it's probably too late.
是啊 没错
Right, right.
谁会随身携带 精♥液♥温度计啊
I mean, who carries a semen thermometer?
总之 我到了 所以...
Anyway, this is me, so...
你就在这里吗
This is you?
我也不想发泄了一番就闪人
I hate to unload and run
但如果我不去见我的治疗医师
but if I don't see my therapist,
他们会把我关起来的
they'll section me.
昨晚那个混♥蛋♥ 你想帮我追捕到他吗
The prick from last night, you want to help me hunt him down?
大棍子捅进屁♥股♥ 拿一罐打火机油烧死他
A pole up the arse, can of lighter fluid. Bshh!
我还有工作要做
I have work.
-我得工作 -好吧 那下次吧
- I have to work. - OK, another time.
绝对的 我会带上捅屁♥股♥的大棍子的
Definitely. I'll bring my arse pole.
是啊 你是该带上
Oh, yeah. You should.
你可得跟上进度了 姑娘
You should get up to speed, girl.
这要成真了
This is happening.
-醒醒吧 -搞什么...
- Wake up! - What the fu...?
我应该掐你的胳膊的 下次吧
I should have pinched your arm. Next time.
-你根本不信我 -我刚刚基本已经信了啊
- You don't believe me. - I was kind of going with it.
你又掐奶头又进精神病院 倒是让我有了些疑虑
The nipple-pinching and psychiatric unit is giving me some doubts.
-你觉得我疯了吗 -显然是他们觉得你疯了
- You think I'm crazy? - They think you're crazy, apparently.
如果我疯了 那你也疯了
If I'm crazy, you're crazy too.
你以为我不知道这一点吗
You think I don't know that?
你需要点时间 好好理解一下当前的情况
You just need some time to get your head round it.
我们应该一起去喝鸡尾酒
We should go for cocktails.
你喜欢鸡尾酒的 对吧
You like cocktails, right?
记得打给我 随时都行 不分昼夜
Call me, any time, day or night.
周二晚9点前不行 因为我要做普拉提
Not Tuesday evenings before nine because I have Pilates.
我可以直接把你的号♥码存我手♥机♥里的啊
I could have just put it in my phone.
根据我的经验 手♥机♥经常容易丢
In my experience, people lose their phones.
还是说他们告诉你手♥机♥丢了
Or they tell you they lose them.
其实是不想打给你 因为你把他们吓到了
They don't want to call you because you totally weird them out.
我得走了
I have to go.
嘿 你来了啊
Hey, you're in?
我以为你今天不会来工作了呢
Didn't think you'd come into work today.
我破产了 我需要这钱
I'm broke, I need the money.
我之前还很担心你呢 过来
Well, I was worried about you. Come on.
-来 抱抱 -我没事 真的
- Bring it in, let's hug it out. - I'm fine, really.
-杰克 杰克 -好吧 行了
- Jake? Jake? - OK, yeah.
好了 就是看看情况
OK, just checking.
某个混♥蛋♥把它们都堆在这里了 你...
Some turd-burger's wedged them all in here. You...
-你身上会留疤吗 -什么
- going to have a scar? - What?
相信我 有疤的女生很性感
Trust me, girls with scars are hot.
从她老爸的挡风玻璃飞出去的那女孩叫什么来着
Who's that girl who went through the windscreen of her dad's car?
艾玛·劳伦斯 坐轮椅的女孩
Emma Lawrence, the girl in the wheelchair.
-你确定不是滑板吗 -相当确定
- Sure it isn't a skateboard? - Pretty sure.
轮椅和滑板很不一样
They're quite different.
我还想着去玩滑板呢
Girl I'm thinking of rides a skateboard.
其实 她身上也没有伤疤
You know what? She doesn't have any scars either.
-所以这事完全不相干吗 -不 也是有用的
- So, it's just totally irrelevant? - No, it's something.
我让你心情好点了啊
I made you feel better.
给我出来 你个该死的毛绒家伙 出来
Get out there, you furry tit! Come out!
"你想待会儿一起出去喝酒吗"
"Do you want to...go for a drink later?"
你真是个混♥蛋♥
You are such a dick.
我去不了
I can't.
拒绝会让他伤心的哦
Rejections hurt his feelings.
你说什么 兄弟
What's that, buddy?
他说他想喝龙舌兰酒
Oh, he says he likes tequila.
还想操♥逼♥
And pussy.
下流的混♥蛋♥
Dirty bastard.
拉奎尔
Raquel?
-嘿 我刚刚在叫你呢 -我知道
- Hey, I was calling you. - I know.
我无视你了
I was ignoring you.
你能告诉我发生什么事了吗 怎么了
Can you tell me what's up? What's going on?
我今天认识了一个女孩
I met a girl today.
那很好啊 瞧瞧你 都开始交朋友了
That's great. Making friends, look at you.
我掐了她的奶头
Pinched her nipple.
-好吧 那个女孩... -艾米
- Right. This girl... - Amy.
艾米 看来她不喜欢被人掐奶头咯
Amy, she didn't like her nipple being pinched, then?
我觉得应该是不喜欢吧
I'm going with no.
我都不知道我为什么要那样
Don't know why I even try.
-她觉得我是个怪胎 -别那么说
- She thinks I'm a freak. - Don't say that.
你需要给她个机会 真正地认识你
You just need to give her a chance to get to know you.
听着 如果女孩们不再喜欢被捏奶头了
And listen, if girls stopped liking having their nipples pinched,
那我们都有麻烦了 因为那是我的调情手段