笑料一火车（1998）

打扰一下 不好意思
Excuse me. Excuse me.
不好意思 额 你会说英语吗
Sorry. Um, do you speak English?.
-不 我不会 不好意思 -哦
- No, I don't. Sorry. - Oh.
我的车坏了 能问你一下你知不知道哪有修车厂吗
My car's broken down, and I wondered if you could tell me where to find a garage.
哎呀 那你真是白费劲啊 我真是听不懂你在说什么
Well, that's wasted on me. I don't understand what you're saying.
-你一点也不会说英语吗 -一点也不会 真的
- You don't speak any English at all?. - Not a word, no.
早知道英语这么有用 我上学的时候就不会神游天外了
It's one of those things. I wish I'd paid attention in school.
请问 你会说英语吗
Excuse me. Do you speak any English?.
-英语 不会啊 怎么了 -我不知道啊 我听不懂她的话
- English?. No. What's the problem?. - I don't know, I can't understand her.
嗨 我车坏了 我得找个修车厂
Hi. My car's broken down and I need to find a garage.
哦 真对不起 我一点也没听懂
No, I'm sorry, I didn't understand that at all.
好吧 那么 谢谢了
All right. Well, thanks.
那条路 也就半公里吧 有个小村子 那可能有人会说英语
That way, about half a mile, there's a village. There might be somebody who speaks English.
我还会说点德语 你会说德语吗
Ich spreche bisschen Deutsch. Sprechen Sie Deutsch?.
-德语 不会 你会吗 -德语 不会
- Deutsch?. Nein. Sprichst du Deutsch?. - Deutsch?. Nein.
不 就会一两个单词 说的很不流利
Nun, ein oder zwei W?rter, aber ich bin nicht flieβend.
-十分抱歉我们没帮上什么忙 -真是抱歉
- I'm sorry we couldn't be more help. - Sorry about that.
下次你再有情况的吧 没准我们会为你学点英语
Next time you're over, maybe we'll have learnt English for you.
-嗯 或者学学德语 -都挺难的
- Ja, oder Deutsch vielleicht. - Ja, das w?re toll.
还是谢谢你们
Thanks anyway.
-其实我会说英语 -我也会
- I can speak English. - So can l.
#癫狂记
#Big Train
#癫狂记
#Big Train
请进
Come in.
-嗨 Stephen -Ray 嘿
- Hi, Stephen. - Ray, hi.
-我想问我们能简单谈谈吗 -好呀 进来吧
- I wonder if we could have a quick word. - Yeah, come in.
我想说的是我们刚看到薪水到帐了
What it is is we've just had our salaries paid into our accounts.
我不知道你是否记得 上个月你又给我们上了一项保险
And I don't know if you remember, but last month you gave us a categorical assurance
生产劳动奖金也应包括在内
that the productivity bonus would be included.
这项没发吗
And has it not?.
账上没显示 这是我们第三次被忽悠了
There's no sign of it. This is the third time we've been let down.
你们这么提醒我是对的 我记得日期 那天是
You're right to bring this to my attention. I remember the date. It was...
-一月十四号♥ -一月十四号♥ 对的 太糟糕了
- January 1 4th. - January 1 4th, yeah. That's dreadful.
这是普通的一副扑克牌 抽一张 随便一张 都行
This is an ordinary pack of cards. Pick one. Any one, doesn't matter.
-这件事 因为我们 -别让我看见牌
- The thing is, because we... - Don't show it to me.
-真希望它能够算在 -记住这张牌 给别人看看
-.. really expected it to be in... - Memorise the card, show it to the others.
-这个月 -好的 再放回来
-..this month... - OK. Pop it back in.
-我们好多人已经认为有点 -下面就是见证奇迹的时刻 好的
-..a lot of us have made sort of... - I'm just going to shuffle. OK.
经济方面
..financial...
看看你的右侧裤兜
Look in your right-hand trouser pocket.
-是你抽的那张吗 -是 就是这张 真是它
- Is that your card?. - Yeah, that's it! That's it!
-你到底怎么 -啊 是这张 你看
- How the hell did you...?. - Ah, there you go, you see.
-他根本都没靠近你的裤子 -是啊 我知道
- He didn't go anywhere near your trousers! - No, I know.
-难道是你进来之前他给你的 -不会啊 他没给我
- Did he give you that before you came in?. - No, he didn't.
-出租车
- Taxi!
机场捷径
机场捷径
有什么消息
What news?.
我的主人 我们在禁区抓获了30个叛徒
My Lord, we captured 30 rebels in the forbidden sector.
很好 那么把他们带到观察室
Good. Then bring them to the holding chamber.
-好的 哦 哦 -怎么了
- Yes. Ow. Ow! - What's wrong?.
疼啊 真♥他♥妈♥疼
That hurts. That really does hurt.
-什么 -什么东西夹得疼
- What?. - I've got something caught.
-是吗 -快把皮夹掉了
- Yes?. - And it's pulling the skin off.
-你能看见吗 -我能看见 我要
- Can you see it?. - I can't see it. I'm gonna...
-不 别拽 -拿开手
- No, don't pull it. - Get your hand away.
好吧 千万别拽 因为它
All right. Just don't pull it, because it...
-哦 它真是 -能不能别像个小孩似的
- Ow! That's... - Stop being such a baby.
我没有 它真疼啊 好吧 虽然 它在里面很难能刮到
I'm not. It does hurt, though. It's hard to shave in this thing.
-夹到后面了 -就是那
- It's caught at the back. - That's it.
很好 不夹了 好了 你刚才说观察室怎么的
That's good. That's gone. OK. What were you saying about the holding chamber?.
-带他们去 -不 又夹到那儿了
- Bring them... - No, it's there again.
头盔又卡到我喉结下面了
The mechanism's catching under my Adam's apple.
-你想把它滑过去吗 -天哪 不 别的 这样吧 让我自己来
- Do you want to slip it off?. - God, no, don't. Leave it. I'll deal with it.
-我想 好了 喉结下来了 如果我硬推的话 -设计的不好 对吧
- I think... That's it, it's free. If I pull up... - It's a bad design, isn't it?.
我想是山寨货 我应该把它退回去
I think it's a shoddy one, I think I should take it back.
-让我告诉你怎么回事吧 我没上润滑油 -是吗
- I'll tell you what it is. I didn't oil it. - Didn't you?.
当你像那样点头时 全部零件都挤到一起了
And when you nod like that, the whole thing comes together.
我的意思是 我五年前就不带它了 晋升就这点好
I mean, I gave up wearing that one five years ago. It's one of the benefits of promotion.
我会找商店退货的 不好意思 你刚才说什么
I'll take it back to the shop. I'm sorry. What were you saying...?.
把他们带到观察室 就把他们关那 不给他们食物或水
Take them to the holding chamber, and just keep 'em there. Give them no food or water.
好的 很好
Right, right.
现在看来这两位选手开局表现很好
We've certainly got a fine opening match from these two players.
仅仅过去12分钟 两位表现的都十分淡定
Just 1 2 minutes gone, and neither man looking particularly in trouble.
你能看见乌克兰选手Roman Solowka那无畏的眼神
You can see that audacious eyeballing that the Ukrainian, Roman Solowka,
正在义无反顾的盯着来自俄♥罗♥斯♥的选手Yuri Uzliam
is giving Yuri Uzliam of Russia on the right there.
但是Uzliam正在严密的防守着 是的 非常镇定
But Uzliam is putting up a brilliant defence - very tight, very solid.
如果你刚刚打开电视 你现在正在收看的是第43届国际盯人锦标赛
If you've just joined us, you're watching the 43rd World Stare-Out Championship finals.
David Joyce和我一如既往的为您解说
David Joyce is with me as usual in the commentary box.
Solowka看起来纹丝不动啊 David
Solowka looks impenetrable, David.
下午好 John 下午好 各位观众
(David) Good afternoon, John. Good afternoon, everyone.
是啊 不得不说他看上去像个假人 John
Yes, he looks like a man in form. And I have to say, John,
当我刚知道这只是今年锦标赛首轮的时候 我想 今年不错啊
when I saw this was the opening fixture of this year's championships, I thought, "great".
因为你可以看见他们在那儿 两人的集中状态是令人惊叹的标准
Cos you can see them there, they're both concentrating to a fantastic standard.
盯得太棒了 说起来这群顶级盯人选手的能力
Wonderful staring. Talk about the ability of the top-level players to stare,
哦 天哪 他们两个人在那是那样的敬业
and by golly, both these men are working hard out there.
他们压力非常大 只要一眨眼就完了
(John) The pressure on these players is enormous. One blink and it's all over.
-喔 哦 我的天哪 -开始流血了
- Ow! Ooh, my goodness me. - Actually, that's bleeding.
流血了 是吗 我能感觉到血顺着我脖子流下来 我得去看看
It's bleeding, isn't it?. I can feel it coming down my neck. I'll go and sort it out.
-好吧 抹上点剃须膏 -好的 我会抹点的
- OK, get some cream on it. - I will, I'll pop a bit of cream on it.
等会再见 我可能会去餐馆吃东西
I'll see you later. I might be in the brasserie.
-好的 我们在那见 -好吧
- OK, I'll see you there. - Right.
给我点个果汁 谢啦
Get me a juice. Lovely.
哦 不 卡布奇诺吧
Oh, no, a cappuccino.
这是我们的命运之战
This is our moment of destiny!
眼前这些树后面藏着我们的敌人 五百人 没准更多
Amid those trees lies our enemy - 500 men, maybe more.
重要的是要保持头脑清醒
It is important we keep clear heads!
仔细听着 这是现在我说过的最重要的信息
Listen carefully. This is the most important thing I will ever tell you,
并且我不再重复
and I shall not say it again!
冲啊
Charge!
炭疽热
炭疽热
啊
Agh!
哈 哈 你个大蠢货
对 就是你 我想跟你谈谈
Right. You! I want a word with you.
-什么 -你 现在
- What?. - You! Now!
就几句 快点
A word. Come on.
呃 我已经考虑好久了
Um, well, I've had a long hard think, and...
我真的已经被逼无奈了 我想确实得让他走了
I really think my hands are tied on this one, I think I'm going to have to let him go.
你不再给他改过的机会了吗
(man) You won't give him another chance?.
我还得给他多少次机会啊 你可知道 我已经给过他三次机会了
How many chances have I got to give?. I've given him at least three chances, you know,
并且我真的受够他了 他真的不改
where I've got pretty heavy with him, and he does nothing.
这就像对牛弹琴 真的
It's like talking to a brick wall, really.
我的意思是 你看他以前 真的搞不懂他
I mean, you saw how he was. You can't get through to the guy.
你的玩笑是有幽默感的 开玩笑没错 但是幽默也是有限度的
I've got just as much of a sense of humour as the next man, OK, but there are limits.
你做的 你做的这些事有点太过了 让人很不爽
You push, you push things just that little bit too far. You upset people.
很不爽吗 大家都喜欢啊
"Upset people"?. People enjoy it.
好吧 我忍♥了很久了 真的
Well, it's been coming a long time, really.
我都快气炸了 告诉他我是怎么想的
Just had a bit of a blow up, told him what I thought.
他把我开除了 我被解雇了
He gave me the sack, I'm sacked.
先不说别的 电击疗法是有危险的
Apart from anything else, there was a danger of electrocution.
她总得换下衣服 她还很害羞 我的天哪 我是说
She had to change her clothing, and she's a shy woman, for goodness sake. I mean...
她觉得很有趣 我后来还跟她谈过
She thought it was very funny. I've spoken to her since.
尽管她曾有过略微的精神崩溃 那是因为工作压力
And she was heading for a mini breakdown anyway, because of the pressure of the work.
他认为他自己是办公室的开心果 他说那有助于 呃 有助于鼓舞士气
(man) He considers himself the office joker. He says it's good for... good for morale.
这也只是我们要处理的人当中的一个 不是么
Well, that's just an example of what we're dealing with, really, isn't it?.
他所谓的 恶作剧
Some of his "pranks", as he calls them,
说白了 有危险 我觉得 而且特别不卫生
quite frankly, are dangerous, I think, and unhygienic quite often.
老鼠 刚刚那次 你想想 到处有死老鼠趴在地上
The mouse, for instance, you know?. Leaving dead mice lying around.
让我告诉你你现在正在做什么 你因为自己处理不好人际关系而来嫉妒地责备我
Here's what you're doing: you're just blaming me for the fact that you run your tight ship.
-你总有说辞 不是吗 -当然不是
- Always got an answer, haven't you?. - No.
-辩解得既幼稚又可怜兮兮的 -有吗
- And it's always adolescent and pathetic. - Is it?.