新喋喋人生

Alan Bennett's Talking Heads S01E01

Part 2 June 25, 2020, 3:35 p.m.

客气地说女王陛下感谢我的担忧
saying Her Majesty appreciated my interest
我的信件已经被转交给
and that my letter had been passed on
相应的部门
to the appropriate authority.
最后的结果是我收到了一封
The upshot eventually is I get a long letter
威斯敏斯特市议会清洁主任的一封长信
from the Chief Cleansing Officer to Westminster City Council,
郑重地道歉
apologising profusely
并附上了他们的道路维护预算
and enclosing a rundown of their highways and maintenance budget.
这就是我的经历了
That's been my experience, generally.
大家现在都太容易感恩不会指出这些事
People are only too grateful to have these things pointed out.
关键就是参与
The keynote is participation.
当然了我回信感谢他
Of course, I wrote back to thank him,
结果没想到
and then blow me
他又寄了一封信来感谢我的感谢
if I didn't get another letter thanking me for mine.
于是我就回信说我没想到他还会回信
So I wrote back saying I hadn't been expecting another letter.
不用再给我回信了
There was no need to have written again,
这算是滥用公共资源吗
and was this an appropriate use of public resources?
这下他们没有回信了
They didn't even bother to reply.
典型做派
Typical.
我只是在等报纸
I'm just waiting for the paper coming.
虽然也没什么好看的
Not that there's much in it.
我写的那封
The correspondence I initiated
关于论述坎特伯雷大主教头发长度的信
on the length of the Archbishop of Canterbury's hair
看来是石沉大海了
seems to have gone off the boil.
我给《见信如晤》写信之前
Until I wrote up to Live Letters,
都没有人注意到过
nobody'd actually spotted it.
人们总喜欢为这样的事发声
Various people took up the cudgels
直到一个留着大胡子的
until there was an impassioned letter
哈利法克斯乡村教区司铎寄来的谴责信
from the Rural Dean of Halifax, who has a beard,
才能平息争端
and that put the tin hat on it.
天色暗了
Getting dark.
对面的夫妇在喝下午茶
The couple opposite just having their tea.
没挂衣服
No cloth on.
他们肯定哄那个孩子上♥床♥了
Think they must have put the kiddy to bed.
我拿出奶瓶的时候听到过他的哭声
When I put the milk bottle out, I heard it crying.
监狱
Prison.
他们太惬意了
Ugh, they have it easy.
电视桌球还有艺术活动
Television, table tennis, art.
简直是度假营
It's just a holiday camp.
你不奇怪这是犯罪待的地方吗
Do you wonder there's crime?
人们会说 "你能怎么办"
And people say, "Well, what can you do?"
你可以从向你的议员反应开始我经常找他
Well, you can get on to your MP for a start. I do, regularly.
有一天早上我收到了一封信的回信
I got a reply to one letter this morning.
我写信希望他注意到一个迄今未被人重视的
I'd written, drawing his attention to a hitherto unnoticed factor
导致犯罪激增的因素
in the rise in crime,
近来戴眼镜的警员人数越来越多了
namely the number of policemen these days who wear glasses.
他们面对穷凶极恶的歹徒能有多少胜算
What chance would they have against a determined assailant?
他注意到了我的建议
He noted my comments
并保证会向相应的部门反应这件事
and promised to make them known in the proper quarter.
他是工党的
He's Labour,
但寄来的信件总是工整打印在上好的纸张上
but it's always very good notepaper and beautifully typed.
我收拾完房♥间结束工作后
When I'd dusted round and done my jobs,
会走到街角
I had a walk on to the end
买♥♥一包猪肉香肠
and bought a little packet of pork sausage
和一些巴西尔顿邦德信封
and some Basildon Bond.
结果在香肠里发现了一根黑色的长发
Big black hair in the sausage.
我就写信给夹入这根头发的香肠制♥造♥商
So I wrote off to the makers enclosing the hair.
我把头发用一根透明胶贴在信上
I stuck it under a bit of Sellotape.
画了一个小箭头 "就是这根头发"
Little arrow - "This is the hair."
我还强调我不想要换货
I emphasised I didn't want a substitute packet
因为显然他们的生产环境就是很不卫生的
as it was plainly manufactured under unhygienic conditions,
所以他们能否给我寄来退款
so would they send me a refund of the purchase price
以及邮费的费用
plus the cost of postage?
我可不想被香肠淹没
Cos I don't want inundating with sausage.
我总是会想到对面的那个孩子
I keep wondering about the kiddy opposite.
我已经一两个星期没见过他了
I haven't seen it for a week or two.
但他们总是出门
And they're out all the time.
每天晚上都会出门但是那孩子却不会
Every single night they go off, and the kiddy doesn't go.
也没人去他们家做过客
And nobody comes in to sit.
最多不超过五个人
It can't be more than five.
他们从哪里搞到出门玩的钱
Where do they get the money to go out?
我真想知道
That's what I'd like to know.
因为他可从来不工作
Because he's not working!
每天都在鼓捣那辆车
Spends all day tinkering with that car.
应该少把心思花在那辆车上
There wants to be a bit less of the car
多关心那个孩子
and a bit more of the kiddy.
孩子们总是闷在家里是需要出门走走的
It never plays out and they want fresh air, do kiddies.
这是一个常识
It's a well-known fact.
现在都听不到哭声了什么都听不到
Don't hear it crying now. Nothing.
我从来没见过他们挂衣服
And I've never seen a cloth on.
茶壶总是在同一个位置
Teapot stuck there.
奶瓶
Milk bottle.
要是他们结婚了我可会大吃一惊
It'll surprise me if they're married.
他还有文身
He has a tattoo anyway.
我妈妈认识这条街上的每一个人
My mother knew everybody in this street.
她对每幢屋子里的住户都如数家珍
She could reel off the occupants of every single house.
以前每个人都可以
Everybody could, once upon a time.
现在的人总是来来去去
Now they come and they go.
所以才会发生这些悲剧
That's why these tragedies happen.
没有人会看了
Nobody watching.
要是他们知道有人在看着他们也许会规矩些
If they knew they were being watched, they might behave.
我和隔壁的邻居聊过
I'd talk to next door's about it,
但自从我们商量好垃圾箱位置后
only there hasn't been any contact
他们就没有来找过我
since the business over the dustbins.
我想我应该去和医生聊聊
I thought I'd go and have a word with the doctor,
问问有什么建议
drop a hint there somehow.
以前只有一位医生
There used to be just one doctor.
现在全都合并了也算是走运吧
Now they've all amalgamated, so it's a bit of a lucky dip.
是个年轻人
Young fella.
我说 "我很抑郁跟之前一样"
I said, "I was getting upset, like I did before."
"什么之前"他说
"Before what?" He said.
我说"病历里都有"
I said, "It's in my notes."
于是他看了一遍说道
So he read them and then he said,
"你有些抑郁跟之前一样
"You've been getting a bit upset, like you did before.
我给你开点药"
"I'll give you something to take."
于是我就和他说了那孩子的事
So I told him about the kiddy,
他说 "这些药片能帮助你
and he said, "Well, these tablets will help you
更加客观地对待这些事"
"To take a more balanced view."
我每天吃三四片
So I gave them three or four days,
但是好像根本没有什么改变
and they didn't seem to me to make much difference,
于是我又去找医生
so I went along again.
这次换了一个医生但说辞还是一样
Different doctor this time. Same rigmarole.
我说我不想再吃药了
I said I didn't want any more tablets.
我只想要知道
I just wanted the name of the firm
我服用的那些药的药厂名因为我觉得
manufacturing the ones I'd already had, because I think
如果他们的药不管用应该有人来告诉他们
they ought to be told if their product isn't doing the trick.
医生说更方便的办法是
And the doctor said it would be easier...
他给我开一些新药
..If he gave me some new tablets,
我不能写信药厂是瑞典的
and anyway I couldn't write - the firm was Swiss.
我说"那又怎么了
I said, "What difference does that make?!
现在人人都说英语了"
"Everybody speaks English now!"
他说"我们可不想惹这样的麻烦啊"
He said, "We don't want to get into that, do we?"
然后重新给我开了药方
and writes me another prescription.
我就不该自找麻烦
I shan't bother with it.
事实上
In fact,
我直接把药冲进了厕所里
I put it down the toilet.
我不知道该找谁写信告知医生的事
I don't know who you write to about doctors.
我喝了茶后
After I'd had my tea,
我坐在前厅
I sat in the front room
在黑暗里
in the dark
看着那屋子
watching the house.