爬坡人生（2019）

他早就该想到这个结果
Yeah, maybe he should have thought about that before he fu...
凯尔 等等 我教过你
Kyle, wait a minute, I taught you...
我们真的要谈这个吗
Are we really having this conversation?
对待他人要体贴 同情 宽容
...how to be caring and compassionate and forgiving,
或许你可以将此视为一次考验
so maybe you should look at this as a test
看看你是否
to see if you can...
-不 -怎么了
- No! - What?
不不不 格蒂 老天啊
No, no, no, Gertie! Oh, my gosh!
-怎么了 -他把火鸡给吃了
- What happened? - He ate the turkey!
格蒂
Gertie!
滚出去
Outside.
该死
Oh, fuck.
妈的
Shit.
听着 你得这么做
Okay, here's what you do.
在汽车的手套箱里放一小瓶伏特加
Keep a small bottle of vodka in your glove compartment.
一旦遇上事故
And when you get in an accident,
就打碎酒瓶
then slam that bottle of vodka down.
-是吗 -就在他们眼前
- Yeah? - Right in front of them.
这样一来 他们就无法证明
That way, they can't prove whether
你是在事故之前还是之后喝醉的
you were drunk before or after the accident.
-这是可行的吗 -万无一失
- So this is real-world advice? - Foolproof.
丹妮 去开门
Dani, get the door!
来了
I'm coming.
我一直想知道开火车是什么感觉
I always wondered what it'd be like to run a train.
嘿 格蒂
Oh, hey, Gertie.
天啊 迈克 你好 圣诞快乐
Oh, my God. Mike, hey. Merry Christmas.
圣诞快乐 丹妮
Merry Christmas, Dani.
快进来吧
Hey, come in. Hey.
-见到你真高兴 -我也是
- Good to see you. - You too.
餐厅有吃的 厨房♥有喝的
There's food in the dining room and drinks in the kitchen.
好的 谢谢
Okay, thanks.
过来 格蒂
Come on, Gertie.
-是迈克尔吗 -你好 奶奶
- Is that Michael? - Hey, Grandma.
-发生什么了 -我不知道
- What happened? - I don't know.
但你听我说 你得理发了 好吗
But listen to me, you gotta go get a haircut, okay?
这家伙不需要理发 他是个女性杀手
Oh, this guy doesn't need a haircut. He's a lady-killer.
就像只老鹰 对猎物发起突击
He's like a hawk, he just swoops in.
-你还好吧 -我还好 马克叔叔
- You doing all right? - Yeah, I'm okay, Uncle Mark.
记得你爱吃的芝士蛋糕吗 是我做的
You know the cheesecake you love? I made it
他没有铁臂 但他脚力惊人
He doesn't have a rocket arm yet, but he's got great feet.
苏茜和我曾经开车去穹顶体育馆
Suzi and I drove up to the Carrier Dome
看他参加州立比赛
to watch him in the state game.
他已经拿到罗格斯大学的录取通知了
He's already got offers from Rutgers...
爸 你看看谁来了
Hey, Daddy, look who's here.
天啊 迈克
Oh, my God. Mike. Hey.
见到你真高兴 孩子
It's great to see you, kiddo.
见到你真高兴 吉姆 还有你
Good to see you, Jim. You too.
我正跟乔治说呢 在你们学院的新生中
Just telling George about this new freshman
发掘出一名新的四分卫
quarterback they got at your college.
-你见过那孩子了吗 -还没有
- Have you seen this kid yet? - No, I haven't.
-喝点吗 -好的
- Want a drink? - Yeah.
-喝我这杯吧 我刚调的 -谢谢
- Just take mine. I just made it. - Thank you.
你的毛衣穿反了
Your sweater's on backwards.
我永远忘不了对阵福克斯队的那场比赛
I'll never forget that game against Fox Lane.
你骗过那个防守端锋 从他的护具旁溜过
You faked that defensive end right out of his jockstrap.
你们是一支出色的队伍 你们应该
You guys made a great team. You ought to...
-嘿 迈克来了 -好的
- Hey, Mike's here. - Okay.
他有点胖 我得先提醒你
He's kind of fat, just a heads-up.
为什么要提醒我
Why would I need a heads-up?
凯尔 迈克在客厅
Well... Kyle, Mike's in the living room.
我刚刚告诉他了 他胖了
Yeah, I just told him. He got fat.
-是吧 -是的
- Right? - Yeah.
-你还好吗 -是的 很好
- You okay? - Yeah, fine.
-你要去和他聊聊吗 -我不知道 丹妮
- Are you gonna talk to him? - I don't know, Dani.
-你要去哪儿 -珠宝网站运营情况如何
- Where are you going? - How's the whole jewelry website going?
很好 凯尔开始帮我一起做了
It's good. Kyle started working with me.
我以为他已经有工作了
I thought he already had a job.
没错 我想他会辞职的
Yeah, I think he's gonna quit.
这个圣诞节我们有很多订单
We got so many orders this Christmas.
凯尔非常擅长礼品包装
And Kyle got really good at gift wrapping.
迈克有那个能力 他是个天生的运动员
Mike had that! He was a natural athlete.
可惜他在大学里没打球
Shame he didn't play in college.
-谁 -迈克
- Who? - Mike.
-你们在聊什么 -时尚
- Hey, what were you guys talking about? - Fashion.
时尚 她比我们更了解时尚吗
Fashion? Does she know more about fashion than we do?
-你们为什么还和她有来往 -她很酷
- Why are you even friends with her? - She's cool.
怎么个酷法
How is she cool?
吉姆·哈里森说过
Jim Harrison says
"我永远无法理解
"I never understood
为何美国人愿意接受糟糕的火腿"
the acceptance of bad ham in America."
我同意他的看法
And I gotta agree with him. I mean,
你想想 有一块美味的火腿
think about it. One ham is really good.
既然你在外面
Can you bring the firewood in from the side
能把屋子旁边的柴火搬进来吗
of the house while you're out here?
当然
Sure.
还有 不准抽烟 这味道太恶心了
Also, stop smoking. It's disgusting.
苏茜 你♥他♥妈♥和我开玩笑吧 干嘛要请他
Suzi, are you fucking kidding me? Why did you invite him?
-因为我们得请他 -那不是理由
- Because. - That's not a reason.
听着 他是我们的家人
Look, he's family.
他不是 他和我们一起长大
He's not family. He grew up with us,
现在他要毁了我们的生活
now he's ruining our lives...
嘿
Hey.
-那是我的橄榄球头盔吗 -是的
- Is that my football helmet? - Yeah.
我在大学里应该打打球的
I should have played in college.
过得怎么样
How's everything going?
很好
Great.
是吗
Yeah?
是的
Yeah.
怎么个好法
What's great?
《浴血黑帮》非常好
Peaky Blinders. It's pretty great.
很好
Oh, okay.
还有呢 除了《浴血黑帮》
What else? Besides Peaky Blinders.
没有了
That's about it.
-你在做什么 -什么意思
- What are you doing? - What do you mean?
我是说你的生活 你在做什么
With your life. What are you doing?
这算什么 这是干预吗
What is this? Is this, like, an intervention?
你打算给我来一场圣诞干预吗
Are you trying to have, like, a Christmas intervention on me?
是的 这就是一场圣诞干预
Yes, this is a Christmas intervention.
好吧 非常感谢 但我不想要
Okay, well, thank you very much, but I don't want one.
你想要什么
What do you want?
什么也不想要
Nothing.
你想让我快乐吗
You want me to be, like, happy?
你想知道我过得很好 一切都好吗
And you wanna know that I'm okay and everything's okay?
我过得不好
I'm not okay.
-你有没有为自己感到过遗憾 -始终如此
- You ever feel sorry for yourself? - All the time.
别再那么做了
Yeah, stop doing that.
为什么你要邀请我来 你儿子很讨厌我
Why did you invite me here? Your son hates me.
没错 他应该讨厌你
Yeah, he should hate you.
我知道 我是个烂朋友
I know. I'm a bad friend.
我就是个烂人
I'm like the shitty person.
好啊 那就改正
Okay, so fix it.
怎么改
How?
别再那么自私了
Stop being selfish.
你对他的所作所为太自私了 完全毁了他
What you did to him was selfish and he was destroyed by it.
别只想着自己
So just stop thinking about yourself
只想着自己的生活有多糟糕
and how sad your life is
想想别人
and think about somebody else.
这可能会让你感觉很好
You know, it just might make you feel good.
好的
Okay.
凯尔是无私的
Kyle is selfless.