我爱你，现在去死吧（2019）（上）

and it tends to make you want to isolate.
你会想要疏离你的父母
You tend to isolate from your parents.
你会想掩盖你的进食问题
You tend to hide your eating problem.
然后她就开始自残
And then, later on, she starts to cut herself.
自残更加加深了和父母的疏离感
And cutting further isolates children from adults.
他们得把伤痕藏起来不让医生发现
They have to hide it from the doctors,
不让父母发现
hide it from their parents.
她每天花几个小时
And she spends hours
和其他那些孩子短♥信♥聊天
texting back and forth with kids
那些孩子也不和父母沟通
who also aren't talking to their parents
他们聊自残 聊进食障碍
about cutting, about eating disorders,
聊自杀
about suicide.
有没有发生过被告给你发短♥信♥
Are there times when the defendant would text you
你隔了一段时间才回复的情况
and you would take a while to text back?
有 -那被告有没有
Yes. - And would she sometimes,
对此有所反应
the defendant, react to that?
有 -她对你隔了一段时间
Yes. - And what... How would her reaction be
才回复的行为作何反应
if you took a long time to respond to her?
她会不停...
She would often repetitively...
不停地给我发短♥信♥直到我回复
Repeatedly texted me until I responded.
你如何描述
And what would you generally describe,
通常情况下
sometimes, to be the length
被告给你发送的短♥信♥的长度
of the defendant's text messages to you?
非常长
Very lengthy.
毫无疑问 米歇尔总是在要求别人
There's no question that Michelle is always asking people
爱她
to love her.
她总是渴望着能和别人相聚
She's always asking to get together,
但似乎相聚对她可遇不可求
and seemingly is not often getting together.
很多她的朋友对她不冷不热
And a lot of her friends couldn't reciprocate
因为她太过黏人
because she's too desperate.
她想要的太多 注定没人能满足这个无底洞
She's so needy. It's a hole no one can fill.
请记住
Keep in mind, this is not
这在年轻女孩中并不罕见
such a strange phenomena among young girls.
高中女孩们互相中伤
Girls in high school destroy each other.
米歇尔·黛安娜·卡特
Michelle Diana Carter.
干得漂亮
Good job!
新闻频道上全都是
It was all over national news.
米歇尔被塑造成恶人
Michelle was made out to, uh, be the bad guy.
那个时候 她出庭的那些朋友
Her... Her friends at that point, the ones that were called,
也都抛弃了她
did abandon her.
她们证词也勾勒了一种不一样的现实
They were painting a different reality than what existed.
重点被放在了米歇尔身上 而不是康拉德
The focus became Michelle, and not Conrad.
他真的想死吗
Did he really want to die?
也就如此 他们成功转移了
And so, they shied away from
康拉德·罗伊自杀的根本原因
the root causes of why Conrad Roy killed himself.
法官大人 这个案子是起自杀案
Your Honor, this case is a suicide case.
不是杀人案
It is not a homicide.
关于康拉德·罗伊
There just is insufficient evidence
在2014年7月13或14日
to a reasonable factfinder
如果没有米歇尔·卡特会不会自杀的问题
to say that Conrad Roy would not have taken his own life
相关证据
on July 12th or July 13th of 2014
是不足的
but for Michelle Carter.
州政♥府♥试图把所有的证据重心
The Commonwealth is trying to have it
都放在米歇尔·卡特身上来证明其有罪
so that the evidence is all about Michelle Carter.
但关于康拉德·罗伊自己的选择和决定
There is so much evidence about Conrad Roy
这方面的证据更多
and his decisions and his choices.
我必须得承认
I can't fathom the fact that
我年纪更小的时候
I was such a happy kid
更快乐一点
when I was younger.
在过去的几年里
And I've created a monster out of myself
因为抑郁症
the past few years
给自己打上了深深的心结
because of my depression.
不间断的胡思乱想
Racing thoughts...
想着自杀
suicidal thoughts.
翻阅他的搜索记录
Go through his Google searches.
"自杀使你解脱"
"Committing suicide makes you happy."
有几百条搜索记录
There are hundreds of these searches.
有自杀计划的
It was Mr. Roy who had a plan
是罗伊先生自己
to take his own life.
一个计划了很久的执念
A long-held belief.
所以问题又回到了归因上
It goes back to the causation issue.
究竟她是不是他死亡的原因
Did she actually cause his death?
这个案子的核心就是
The question at the heart of this case is
你能导致别人自杀吗
can you cause someone else to commit suicide?
检方必须要证明米歇尔·卡特
The prosecution has to prove that Michelle Carter
造成了康拉德·罗伊的死
caused Conrad Roy's death.
说他有自主意志
To suggest that he had his own free will,
我们都有一定程度的自主意志
and... and we all do, to an extent,
他完全可以无视米歇尔的论调
and he could've just ignored her,
过度简化了实际情况
is an oversimplification of what was going on here.
在"你为什么还没自杀"
Between the statements of "Why haven't you done it yet?"
以及类似的内容之外
and things of that nature, were other words,
还有表达爱意的句子
and they were words of love.
而爱意在这里是危险的
Although it may seem odd that I'm suggesting
虽然听起来有点怪
that words of love could be considered reckless,
但对他们来说是事实
I think they are here when you look at the circumstances.
她知道他有社交焦虑
She knew that he had social anxiety.
她知道他有抑郁症
She knew that he was depressed.
她知道他的弱点因为他信任她
She knew his frailties because he confided in her.
但不仅仅如此 法官大人
But not only that, Your Honor,
她了解她自己
she knew herself.
她知道孤独是什么滋味
She knew what it was like to be lonely.
六月结束到七月的时候
And as June turned into July,
她的措辞变成了"我爱你 去自杀吧"
she turned that into "I love you, kill yourself."
我不知道如果你真的爱一个人
I don't know how someone could tell someone else
怎么能让他去自杀
to kill themselves that supposedly loved them.
你会想去帮他们
You want to help them,
但不是帮他们自杀
not help them to kill themselves.
一场很完美的悲剧
It's a perfect storm of a tragedy.
彻头彻尾的悲剧
It's a complete tragedy.
太多因素造成了这样的结果
Many things played a role in here.
有些看上去非常重要的事
And some things that seem very important
在我看来被检方隐瞒了
seem to me to have been withheld by the prosecution.
你不能单看一条短♥信♥
You can't look at one text message,
你得看他们的一整段关系
You have to look at the totality of their relationship.
我原本是被叫来判断
I was brought in to see whether
康拉德·罗伊吃的药是否让他有自杀倾向
Conrad Roy's medication had made him suicidal.
但我发现米歇尔也在服用精神药物
And I found out that Michelle was on psychiatric drugs, too.
所以这俩孩子
So we have these two kids,
他们不是苦命鸳鸯 他们是苦药鸳鸯啊
they're not star-crossed, they're drug-crossed.
她很害怕 她知道他要死了
She was scared, she know he's gonna die.
她说 "我本来能阻止他的
And she said, "I could have done something to stop him,
如果我阻止了他 他今天还活着"
and if I had, he would still be alive today."