无线（2020）

无线
第一季 第三集
操
Fuck!
不是吧 操
Come on! Shit!
完好无损 爸 瞧
Look, not a scratch, Dad, see?
完蛋了
I'm so screwed.
妈
操
Shit.
妈 我
Hey, Mom, listen, I, uh--
你必须马上回来
You have to come back right now.
妈 我回不去 派对明天才开始
Mom, I can't, but the party starts tomorrow,
然后
and there's...
这和派对无关 是莱昂内尔 我就知道
It's not about the party. It's Lionel. I knew it.
-你知道什么 -你弟昨晚喝醉了
- You knew what? - Your brother got drunk last night.
和他的朋友 那个白♥痴♥ 杰森·卡斯尔
With that friend of his, that idiot, Jason Castle.
-你怎么知道 -因为他睡了一整天
- How do you know that? - Because he's been sleeping all day.
我也找不到龙舌兰酒了
And I can't find the tequila.
我把它放在冰箱上面的柜子里 现在不见了
I put it in the cabinet above the refrigerator, and now it's gone.
你确定放在那里了吗
Are you sure that's where you put it?
是的 安德鲁
Yes, Andrew.
你很清楚 质疑我的记忆力会让我难过
And you know how it makes me feel when you question my memory.
妈 我给莱昂内尔打个电♥话♥
Mom, listen, I'll call Lionel
把一切都搞定 好吗
and get everything sorted out, okay?
你就想办法冷静下来
You just find a way to calm down,
深呼吸 练椭圆机
take some deep breaths, do the elliptical;
-一切都会好起来的 -谢谢你 亲爱的
- everything's gonna be fine. - Oh, God, thank you, honey.
-我和他联♥系♥上就给你打电♥话♥ 好吗 -好
- I'll call you as soon as I speak to him, okay? - Okay.
-好吗 爱你 -我爱你 谢谢
- Okay? Love you. - Oh... I love you, thanks.
多远啊
How far is that?
道路救援
由于天气原因
Due to weather conditions,
目前通话繁忙
we are experiencing unusually high call volume.
您前面有35位客户
There are 35 callers ahead of you.
弥天大谎分享了一个视频
什么
What the fuh...
莱昂内尔
小莱 别跟老妈顶嘴
Ly, stop being mean to Mom.
她说我偷酒啊
Dude, she's fricking accusing me of stealing alcohol.
那酒呢
What happened to it?
我不知道
I don't know.
也许有人闯进来了
Maybe someone broke in.
你见过莫莉的狗门
I mean, you've seen Molly's doggy door.
个头小的人肯定能钻进来啊
It's definitely big enough for a small man.
昨天晚上没人闯进来 我在家
Ly, no one broke in last night, I was home.
好吧 我不知道 安迪
Okay, well, I-- I don't know then, Andy.
那就是老妈故意黑我
Mom must've framed me, then,
因为她不想让我交朋友
because she doesn't want me to have any friends.
会不会是你朋友拿的呢
So, could one of your friends have taken it?
不会
No.
兄弟
Listen, bud.
我接下来跟你说的话 不能告诉老妈
You can't tell Mom what I'm about to tell you,
我们再给她施加压力了 好吗
because she doesn't need any more stress from us, okay?
好的
Okay.
老爸确诊以后抽了三年的烟
Dad smoked cigarettes for three years after he was diagnosed.
三年 他知道自己快死了
Three years, while he knew he was dying.
我们都知道他快死了 老爸太蠢了
While we all knew he was dying. Dad was stupid.
收回这句话
Take that back.
但你不一样 好吗 不要抽烟了
But you're not like that, okay? So stop fucking vaping.
明白吗
You understand me?
小莱 我不会告诉老妈
Ly, I'm not gonna tell Mom,
但是
but please...
请答应我不要再抽烟了
please promise me that you'll stop.
-拜托 -好吧 我答应你
- Please, man. - Okay, I promise.
谢谢
Okay. Thank you.
我挂了 新年快乐 兄弟
All right, I gotta go. Happy New Year, bud.
新年快乐
Happy New Year.
杰克 杰克
Jake? Jake?
我不是杰克 我是杰姬
This isn't Jake, this is Jackie!
-我在等我的午夜之吻 -杰克
- I'm waiting for my midnight kiss. - Jake?
-杰克 听我说 别闹了 -你在哪
- Jake, man, listen to me, seriously. - Where are you?
杰克 我被困在一座偏僻的山上
Jake, I'm stuck on the side of a mountain in the middle of nowhere.
我撞车了 伙计
Dude, I crashed my car, man,
还找不到驾照
and I can't find my license, and...
你能把这破玩意关了吗
dude, can you please turn that fucking thing off?
-我生下来就是这样 -杰克 我是认真的
- I was born this way, man. - Jake, I'm serious, man, please!
好吧 我关了 抱歉
Okay, okay, I'm turning it off, I'm sorry.
等等 你的驾照呢
Hold on. Where's your license?
我不知道 伙计
I don't know, man,
莱昂内尔拿去买♥♥烟了吧
I think Lionel took it to buy a vape or some shit, man.
杰克 听着
But, Jake, listen...
你有什么办法来接我吗 伙计
is there any conceivable way that you could come pick me up, man?
我离博尔德最多一小时车程
I'm, like, an hour from Boulder, tops.
老兄 我没办法开那么久
Oh, dude, I cannot spend years in my car...
罗纳德·法伯来了
...Ronald Farber rolls in, dude!
-杰克 -他带了一个酒桶
- Jake-- Jake-- - Dude, he's got a keg--
听我说 伙计 我被困在这里了
Dude, listen to me, man, I'm stuck out here.
-等你哦 伙计 -杰克 等等
- waiting for you, man. - Jake, don't, wait...
干杯 艾希礼 借过一下
Bottoms up, Ashley. Dude, come through, bro.
杰克 我哪儿都去不了
Jake, I can't go anywhere,
我被困在山上了
I'm stuck on the side of a fucking mountain.
杰克 听我说 拜托 我是认真的
Jake, listen to me, man. Please, please, I'm dead serious.
我真的 你在听吗
I literally-- are you listening?
-我在听 -我一小时前就被警♥察♥拦车了
- I'm listening! - I literally got pulled over an hour ago,
我可能会因为无证驾驶入狱的
and I could go to jail for driving without my license, man.
伙计 你打电♥话♥给你妈吧
Okay, well, dude, why don't you just call your mom?
什么 不行 伙计 你在开玩笑吗
What? No, I can't, dude, are you kidding?
我开的是野马 我爸的野马
I took the Bronco, my dad's Bronco.
-什么 我♥操♥ -是的
- What? Fuck... - Yeah.
你打算怎么办
What-- What are you gonna do?
把它拖走啊
Dude, I'm gonna get it towed out of here.
嗯 好主意 伙计
Yes, yes, that's a great idea, man.
你可以叫个拖车
You can get a tow truck guy to come
然后载你一程 他们有这个服务
and then give you a ride, because they do that shit.
不 杰克 今晚有暴风雨 他们来不了了
No, Jake, they can't do it tonight because of the storm,
要是你不来接我
which I will fucking freeze to death in,
我他妈的会冻死的
if you don't come pick me up, man.
天哪 他们没有关闭东70号♥公路吗
Oh, my God, they didn't close the 70 East?
没有
Nope.
-伙计 我恨你 -伙计 我爱你
- Dude, I hate you so much. - Dude, I love you.
我太爱你了 杰克 谢谢
I love you so much, Jake-- Jake, listen, thank you.
走蛇河路
Take Snake River Road.
左拐以后打电♥话♥给我
And then take a left and then call me.
我醒个酒就过去
Okay, I'm gonna sober up, and I will be there.
-你赶紧走过去 -好的
- You start walking. - Okay.
快点 快点啊
Yeah, but hurry, hurry, please.
-最好的朋友 快走吧 -好的
- ...fucking best-est friend ever, go! - Okay, okay,
好的 我走
I will, I will, I will.
天哪
Jeez.
好吧
Okay.
凯莉给你发了一条信息
你怎么样
现在好多了
太老套了吧
"万事皆有因"还不老套吗
也素
也是
你在干嘛
你滑单板还是双板
你的答案将决定这次聊天的时间长短
都不滑
见鬼
Oh, shit.
拉黑了 再见
不
我滑无舵雪橇
大笑
你想来参加除夕派对吗
不想
抱歉
我刚失恋
我也是
怎么回事
你不想说可以不说
最近家里事太多了
没时间谈恋爱
你呢