中年失恋日记（2022）

I don't feel any different.
我没感觉有什么不同
We have only begun.
我们才刚刚开始
The journey takes time.
这个旅程需要时间
Oh, the journey takes time.
这个旅程需要时间
And I'm guessing you have to buy a package.
我猜你得买♥♥个套餐才行
Are you ready to go to level two?
准备好进入第二阶段了吗？
Uh, okay.
好吧
That's two.
两个
That's three. That's four.
三个 四个
Seven.
七个
- That's... - That's 12...
-这是… -十二个
...13, 14, 15.
十三、十四、十五
- That's 16. - Okay.
-十六 -好吧
All right.
好了
There you go.
可以了
That's it? I'm done?
就这样吗？结束了？
Do you think you're done?
你觉得结束了吗？
Well, I fell asleep around level ten,
好吧 我在第十阶段的时候睡着了
but yeah, sure, I'm done.
但没错 我结束了
Thanks.
谢谢
It was
就…
okay.
还好吧
Oh! Don't forget your T-shirt.
别忘了你的T恤
Now do me!
现在轮到我了！
I'm next.
下一个是我
Four hundred dollars. That's a cut and color.
四百美元 都够剪发染发了 我比刚进去时更生气
I'm madder now than when I went in.
Are you ready not to care? There, healed! What did he whisper to you, anyway?
准备好放下心结了吗？好 治愈了！ 话说他对你说了什么？
Oh, he told me if I wanted to have a fulfilling relationship,
他告诉我 如果想要一段圆♥满♥的关系
I had to get the man out of my bed.
我得让那个男人下床
What man? What man? That's the whole point. There is no man.
什么男人？重点就在这里 根本没有男人啊
Metaphorical man. Metaphorical bed.
男人和床都是一种比喻
Fuckin' Mia.
该死的米娅 她肯定有回扣
- I bet she gets a kickback. - Pfft.
（你的第一♥期♥！ 《今日心理》柯林麦肯纳）
Guy, come on, wake up!
拜托 醒一醒！睁开眼睛看看路！
Open your eyes!
Hey, how's it goin'? Nice to see you.
嘿 你好吗？很高兴见到你
Wow! What do you got goin' on here? Nice. Good to see you too.
哇！这里都是什么？ 真不错 我也很高兴见到你
- Michael? - Look at this.
-麦克？ -瞧瞧这个
Hi!
嗨！
Beautiful day, isn't it?
今天的天气真不错啊 对吧？
This city is so alive.
整个城市充满活力
The car honks, the buses, the crazies.
汽车的鸣笛、公交汽车 喧嚣吵闹
It's like a symphony.
就像交响乐一样
And did you ever notice the pavement sparkles here? What is that, quartz?
你有没有注意到 这里的人行道闪闪发光？是水晶吗？
Oh no, you're so happy.
不好 你过于开心了
Like one of those people who just decided to kill themselves.
就像那些决定自杀的人一样
No, Stanley. I had an experience.
不 斯坦利 我经历了一次治愈旅程
I woke up this morning, and get this,
我今早醒来 听好了
I was awake for 36 minutes before I once thought of Colin.
我醒了足足36分钟才第一次想起柯林
Thirty-six minutes!
整整36分钟！
He's, like, gone. He's not in me anymore.
他离开了 他已经不在我的记忆中了
He is out there in this beautiful world, having his own adventure.
他在这个美丽的世界里 开始自己的探险旅程了
That's... good?
这是好事？
Uh, it's a miracle.
简直是奇迹
He only crossed my mind
我只是在收到一本寄给他的杂♥志♥时 才想起这个人
when I saw a magazine addressed to him.
Psychology Today. He's a new subscriber.
《今日心理》他是新订阅用户
Isn't that sad?
是不是很可悲？
Because clearly, he's suffering,
因为显然 他很痛苦
and that must have been going on for a long time before...
这种痛苦肯定很久以前就开始了 甚至早于…
- What's happening here? - And all I feel is compassion. Not anger.
到底是怎么回事？
我的内心只感受到同情 没有愤怒
He must have been so lonely, and he hid that from me.
他一定很孤单 而且向我隐瞒了这一点
That, along with all the moving boxes and packing tape.
也隐瞒了那些搬家的箱子和胶带
I know!
我知道！
Poor Colin. You've gotta be in such enormous pain to behave that way.
可怜的柯林 一个人肯定是极其痛苦 才会做出这种行为
Are you crying for Colin?
你在为柯林哭吗？
I'm crying for both of us.
我在为我们两个流泪
And now that I have, I feel like this weight has lifted off me, and I'm free.
哭过之后 我感觉整个人轻松了很多 我现在自♥由♥了
I'm open. And the world has already responded.
我敞开了心怀 整个世界已经做出了回应
I got one of my clients to make an offer
我有一位客户 给切尔西那间一居室提了出价
on that one-bedroom in Chelsea.
And you know that that only happened because...
你知道这种事情会发生 只因为…
Josh Gibson. The dermatologist my dad's trying to set me up with.
乔希吉布森 我爸想给我牵线的那个皮肤科医生
- I don't trust the universe that much. - Do you trust Google?
-看来还是不能太相信宇宙命运 -你相信谷歌♥吗？
I'm not sure being pimped out by your dad
我不太确定 爸爸做媒人这种事
isn't the greatest idea of all time!
会是什么彻头彻尾的好主意！
Oh my God!
我的天！
See what happens when you're open?
瞧瞧 开放心态后会发生什么？
- Oh, we're gonna hug again. - Aw!
好吧 又抱一次
♪ Permanent vacation... ♪
Ben is one of my favorites, so I figured I'd like his son.
本是我最爱的病人之一 所以我想我也会喜欢他的儿子
He's a problem-solver. He wants me to get out there.
他很善于解决问题 他想让我走进恋爱市场
You don't seem like much of a problem.
你看起来不像是什么“问题”
Anyway, he didn't really talk about you very much.
不过他也没太聊过你
He, uh... he just looked at me and he said, "Do you have love in your life?"
他只是看着我 然后说： “你的生活中有爱情吗？”
- Please tell me you're joking. - It was really sweet.
-你在开玩笑吧？ -我觉得很贴心
And very brave, considering I had a scalpel in my hand.
而且非常勇敢 毕竟我的手上拿着一把手术刀
Then I said, "No, not at the moment, but I'm open."
然后我说：“没有 目前没有 但我愿意试试”
And then he suggested you,
然后他推荐了你
which was a huge relief, considering he's not exactly my type.
这让我松了一口气 毕竟他不是我喜欢的类型
I'm incredibly grateful I take after my mom.
谢天谢地 我继承了我妈妈的样子
Not that I love dating. There are a lot of weird guys out there.
倒不是说我喜欢约会 只是这世上有很多奇怪的人
Oh my God. I know. It's crazy now.
我的天 我太理解了 真的很疯狂
This guy the other night wanted to have sex with me without a condom.
有个人曾经想和我不戴安全套上♥床♥
Not how I was raised.
我从小接受的教育可不是这样的
Well, not that my parents ever actually talked to me about sex.
不过我的父母从没跟我聊过性教育
They'd just tune the clock radio to Dr. Ruth.
他们只会把时钟收音机 调到露丝医生的节目
Mm. I miss clock radios.
我很怀念时钟收音机
So now I don't date anyone under 40.
所以我现在不和40岁以下的人约会
Which may mean that we are not a match?
或许这说明我们不太配？
I'm both flattered
我真的受宠若惊
and extremely worried that you operate on my dad with such poor eyesight.
但也非常担心 你视力这么差 还给我爸做手术
Well, this has been fun.
我聊得很开心
What next?
接下来呢？
Oh, uh, listen, I like you a lot. I've been having fun as well.
听着 我很喜欢你 我也聊得很开心
But I'm not ready to have sex on a first date.
但我还没准备好 第一次约会时就直接上♥床♥
Oh! You...
You... you thought that we were gonna have sex tonight?
你以为我们今晚会上♥床♥？
Uh, no, I've been eating pasta. I meant dessert.
不是的 我一直在吃意大利面 我是指甜点
Oh, thank God.
真是谢天谢地
- Let's order all the desserts. - Yes!
-我们把所有甜点都点一遍吧 -好
I opened myself up to the world,
我向整个世界敞开心扉
and the world delivered this beautiful dermatologist, and it just clicked.
世界为我送来一位帅气的皮肤科医生 我们一拍即合
It's so easy for you gay guys.
对你们同性恋来说真简单
The wedding announcements in The New York Times?
《纽♥约♥时♥报♥》上的婚礼公告？ 完全看不到女性的内容
Not a vagina or veil in sight.
If you don't count lesbians, which I do, since that's where I'm heading.
如果不算上女同性恋的话 我会算上 这是我要发展的方向
And he's a grown-up.
而且他很成熟
He's accompanying me to Stanley's opening tonight. Great, right?
今晚他会陪我 参加斯坦利的开幕式 很棒吧？
Mm. Hooray.
真棒啊！
Fucking healer. Where's my hot doctor?
该死的治愈大♥师♥ 我的性感医生在哪里呢？
Oh, I think we let this broker suffer long enough.
-这个经纪人应该够痛苦了 -是啊
Right, yeah.
Hey, Richard, look, I've been wrestling with my buyer for the last half hour.
嘿 理查德 我跟买♥♥家在会议室里协商了半小时
No, wait, stop. Don't pull the offer. Just give me one minute, please!
不 等等 别放弃 给我一分钟 拜托！
I keep telling her it's a great deal for a one-bedroom.
我一直跟她说 对于一居室来说 这个价格很划算
I think she'll come up to your seller's number if you guys cover closing costs.
如果你们能支付交易费用 她应该可以付买♥♥家的要价
No, no, no!
Sorry, Richard, she's pushing back.
抱歉 理查德 她不太同意 要我跟她说不能成交吗？
Should I tell her no deal,
then you tell your clients to take their chances in this market and wait?
然后你去告诉你的客户 再冒险等等别的机会？
Absolutely. Good call, Richard. Thank you.
当然 干得好 理查德 谢谢
- He folded. We closed! - Ah!
他妥协了 我们成交了！
Whoo!