穿越烟壶（2016）

That was more you than me! That was dumb, that was bad.
是你的比我大 蠢死 糟透了
God! You know what though?
晕死 不过你知道吗
They might make it out.
他们或许能活着回来
You know, we have to do this, right?
我们必须做这事 对吧
We have to make up for our sins. We're gonna do it.
我们必须弥补我们的罪恶 一定得去做
God, we were two New Jersey dildos,
天啊 我们以前是两个新泽西屌♥丝
and now we have the chance to make history better.
现在我们有机会改善历史
Yes.
没错
We are gonna save Michael Jackson.
我们要拯救迈克尔·杰克逊
By kidnapping him.
通过绑♥架♥他
Love it.
好棒
But Joe Jackson did see us.
不过乔·杰克逊刚刚看到了我们
Well, we're gonna need disguises.
我们需要伪装
Really subtle disguises.
很不易察觉的伪装
Ooh, good afternoon!
下午好
Can I help you?
有什么事吗
Oh, well, we were just looking for the home of a Mr. Joseph Jackson.
我们在寻找乔瑟夫·杰克逊先生的家
That's me.
我就是
Oh, is it?
是吗
Well, how lucky are we?
我们是有多幸运
My name is Beverly McClellan,
我叫贝弗莉·麦克伦
and this is my colleague, Simon Cowell.
这是我同事 西蒙·考威尔
We are producers of a television program called "The Bee's Knees."
我们是一个叫做《当代偶像》的电视节目的制片人
"Bee's Knees."
《当代偶像》
Yes, "The Bee's Knees."
对 《当代偶像》
We were just wondering if perhaps your children
我们在想你家小孩是否
would perhaps like to audition to sing and dance on our show.
愿意来参加我们节目的海选 表演唱歌♥跳舞
Sing and dance.
唱歌♥跳舞
Yes, sing and dance.
是的 唱歌♥跳舞
Like I said.
我刚刚说了
How much?
多少钱
The payment would be about 60.
报酬大概是60
60? Thousand!
60 6万
Thousand? What? Mmhmm.
6万 什么
Kids! Get out on the lawn now!
孩子们 快出来
60,000? Let's go, Jacksons!
6万 快点 杰克逊们
Jackie, Rebbie, Tito, Jermaine, La Toya, let's go!
杰克 瑞比 蒂托 杰姆恩 拉托娅 快点
Michael, Marlon, Randy, let's go, Jacksons!
迈克尔 马龙 兰迪 快啊 杰克逊们
Let's go! Definitely Michael.
快点 迈克尔一定要来
Yeah, Michael, Michael, bring your ass on, come on!
好的 迈克尔 迈克尔 你也来 快
What about Janet? Who?
珍妮特呢 谁
Not born yet.
尚未出生
Ha ha, just kidding, daddy-o.
逗你呢 老爹
Jacksons! Come on, let's go!
杰克逊们 快 我们走
Get out there on the lawn!
快出来
Are you Michael?
你是迈克尔吗
I'm Jackie. Ooh, good luck.
我是杰克 祝你好运
Hey, are you Michael?
嘿 你是迈克尔吗
I'm Tito. Who's Michael?
我是蒂托 谁是迈克尔
I am.
我是
Daddy!
爸爸
We got the King of Pop. We got the King of Pop.
我们抓到流行之王了 我们抓到流行之王了
Top of the evening to you.
祝你晚上愉快
I'm Beverly McClellan.
我是贝弗莉·麦克伦
We would like one motel room for us and our son here,
我们想给自己和儿子定一间房♥
Michael Jackson.
他叫迈克尔·杰克逊
Fuck! Language.
操 不准讲脏话
Thank you so much.
非常感谢
Well, my dogs are really killing me.
我的脚痛死了
Oof, these shoes, mm.
该死的鞋
You have such a pretty voice, Mrs. McClellan.
你的声音真美 麦克伦女士
It's Ms. McClellan,
是麦克伦小姐
but, look, we're not who you think we are, okay?
听着 我们的真实身份不是你以为的那样
My name is Jeff, and this is my cousin, Sharee.
我叫杰夫 这是我表妹 雪莉
But thank you so much for saying I have a nice voice.
不过谢谢你夸我声音好听
It is insanely flattering coming from you.
被你夸奖是在太荣幸了
I'm gonna sing for you later. You might like my voice as well.
我稍后会为你唱歌♥ 你或许也会喜欢我的声音
Look at that skinny nose.
瞧你的小鼻子
My dad would love your nose.
我爸爸会很喜欢你的鼻子的
He always makes fun of mine.
他总是取笑我的鼻子
Oh, no.
不
No, Michael, your nose is perfect.
不 迈克尔 你的鼻子很完美
Your face is beautiful.
你的脸也很美
Just as it is right now.
就这样就很好看
Michael, we had to take you, okay?
迈克尔 我们必须带走你 知道吗
We had to make sure that you weren't abused
我们得确保你不会受到虐待
and you were nurtured.
并且被好好培养长大
You are so insanely talented.
你真的超有才华
Check it out. You're superhuman.
听听吧 你简直是超人
No.
不
No, no, no, no, no.
不不不不
Excuse us just one second.
失陪一下
What are you doing?
你搞什么
I'm hanging out with Michael Jackson right now.
我正在跟迈克尔·杰克逊一起玩呢
His music is disappearing.
他的音乐都消失了
No.
不是吧
No, fuck!
不要啊 操
Language!
不准讲脏话
We gotta take him back.
我们必须把他送回去
No! No, Jeff, how can we?
不行 杰夫 怎么能那样
How can we now?
我们现在怎么能那么做
Come on, we have to weigh the pros and cons here.
拜托 我们必须权衡一下利弊
Okay, fine.
好吧 行
Pro, Michael seems like a healthy, happy,
利 迈克尔逃离了他的家庭
normal child away from his family.
似乎是个健康 开心正常的小孩
Yeah, con, bringing him here
好吧 弊 把他带到这里来
is making his music disappear, Sharee.
让他的音乐消失了 雪莉
His music brought joy to literally billions of people.
他的音乐给几十亿人带去了快乐
Okay, pro.
好吧 利
The dozens to hundreds of children
那些被迈克尔猥亵的
that Michael molested would be saved.
几十甚至几百个孩子就会被拯救
Allegedly molested.
只是谣传而已
Alleged, what are you talking about?
谣传 你在说些什么呢
Google it. I can't, Sharee.
谷歌♥搜索下 做不到啊 雪莉
It's 1963.
现在是1963年
Here's a con, if we bring him back,
弊 如果我们把他送回去
he might still molest kids, you don't know.
他可能还是会猥亵孩子 你又不确定
Pedophilia might be an inborn thing.
恋童这种心理可能是天生的
The jury's still out on that, right?
那个还没有定论 对吧
I don't know, Jeff. I can't Google it.
我不知道 杰夫 我又没办法谷歌♥
You just covered that. Okay.
你刚已经说过这点了 好吧
But the point is we have the chance to make things right.
但重点是 我们现在有机会纠正错误
That sweet little boy out there,
那个可爱的小男孩
he doesn't want to be the Neverland Ranch guy.
他并不想成为将来梦幻庄园里的那个人
I know, he became so weird, his tattooed beard.
我懂的 他后来变得好古怪 那个胡须纹身
The makeup, and the vitiligo.
那吓人的化妆和惨白的皮肤
And the nose, the glasses and the glove.
那个假鼻子 眼镜和手套
Elizabeth Taylor and the wheelchair.
和伊丽莎白·泰勒的友情 那个轮椅舞
The Blanket incident, I'm like, "What are you doing?"
给小孩取名叫地毯 我当时心想 你搞毛呢
He really was abused by his father.
他真的被他的父亲虐待过
But his father was abused by the system.
但他的父亲被整个社会体系虐待了
But his music!
但是他的音乐好赞啊
But "Thriller"! The dance!
《Thriller》那首歌♥ 那个舞
It doesn't matter. That's a sweet boy. You're right.
那都不重要 他是个好孩子 你说得对
You're right,
你说得对
we've got to do the right thing. Yes.
我们必须做正确的事 好棒
We are going to raise Michael Jackson as our son.
我们要把迈克尔·杰克逊当我们的儿子养大
Yikes.
天了噜
I'm just gonna...
我还是...
Take this.
拿下来