穿越烟壶（2016）

Every guy I've ever been with
我的每一任男朋友
wants me to shave my pubes off.
都要求我把阴毛刮掉
The guys here love my body hair.
但这里的男人超爱我的体毛
I don't have to shave or wax.
我不需要刮毛或蜜蜡除毛
There's no need to Veet or Nair,
不必用除毛膏
which means no Nair burns,
也就意味着不会灼伤
no threading, no plucking, no bleaching.
不需要涂抹 撕扯 漂白
Fuck, one of them found me.
操 其中一个找到我了
Come on, we've got to go right now.
快 我们得赶快走了
I don't have to electrolysis, Jeff.
我不需要再用点解疗法了 杰夫
No need to no! No! Come on!
好多事都可以免了 不 快走
She's getting closer.
她快靠近了
We gotta go, come on! No sugaring, no lasering!
我们得快走了 没有糖 没有激光脱毛
Please, Sharee! Oh, fine.
求你了 雪莉 好吧
Come on, Sharee, we don't have much time.
快啊 雪莉 没时间了
Ugh, do it.
来吧
Oh, Miss Paula D., come on, I ain't even did nothing.
宝拉·黛小姐 拜托 我没做错任何事啊
I was thinking about you hotly,
我刚刚还在意淫你
and now you got to be punished.
现在你得被惩罚了
It's your fault, dressing the way you was.
穿得这么风♥骚♥勾引我 都是你的错
Oh, God, ow.
天啊
Interlopers!
有贼啊
Slaves?
奴隶吗
This is slave time. These are slaves.
现在是奴隶时代 这些人是奴隶
These are slaves, yeah.
是奴隶 没错
Shoot 'em, Clyde! Shoot 'em!
开枪啊 克莱德 开枪打死他们
Give me a second.
稍等一下
Get away from her. We can save you.
离她远点 我们可以救你的
Get over here. Come on, hold onto us.
到这边来 快来 抓住我们
Come on, hurry! Come on.
快啊 快点 快来
We're gonna save you. Shoot 'em, shoot, 'em,
我们可以救你的 开枪 快开枪
It's stuck.
枪卡壳了
Sharee, Leave the uggs.
雪莉 别管你的靴子了
I think we've got a little time.
我想我们还是有点时间的
Ah, here we go.
好了
Shoot 'em now! Shoot 'em!
快开枪 开枪啊
Hold on tight, guys.
抓紧了 各位
Paula D.?
宝拉·黛
Where are we? I don't know.
我们这是在哪儿 我也不知道
Oh, my God, it's 1963.
天啊 现在是1963年
We did it. We're white saviors.
我们做到了 我们是白人救世主
You're free. You're free.
你们自♥由♥了 你们自♥由♥了
What's happened here?
什么情况
Sorry, we time traveled
不好意思 我们从奴隶年代
from slave times to free times, 1963.
时空穿梭到了自♥由♥年代 1963年
Yeah, there's no slavery here, guys.
是的 这里没有奴隶制度
You're liberated.
你们自♥由♥了
It's an awesome time for black people.
这对黑人来说是个极好的年代
It's not great actually. Not awesome.
其实并不太好 没有极好
In fact, even our time is bad. That was too far.
实际上 即使在我们的年代也很糟糕 我夸张了
There's, like, a lot of police...
有很多警♥察♥
It's maybe better than slave times by a little bit.
也许比奴隶年代好一点点
I've been writing about it on my blog, it sucks.
我一直有在我博客上写这个 糟糕透了
You gotta take me back.
你们得带我回去
My children. I got eight children.
我的孩子 我有8个孩子
That's not counting the mulattos and the quadroons!
那还不包括黑白混血和有1/4黑人血统的
I'm so sorry, but we can't. I'm sorry.
抱歉 但我们不能 抱歉
We're stuck here. We don't know how the bong works.
我们被困在这里了 不知道烟壶如何运作
'Cause it's kind of broken, and you guys are gonna
因为坏掉了 你们只能
just have to blend in.
尝试融入这里了
We ain't got nowhere to live.
我们没有住的地方
We ain't got nowhere to work.
没有工作的地方
I don't even know how to read.
我甚至不识字
Ooh, you got to learn.
那你得去学
Excuse me, miss.
借过下 小姐
Would you like to join the army?
你们想加入军队吗
Get a hot meal and a gun with your name on it.
能得到一顿热饭和一把印有你名字的枪
You mean, like, a musket?
你是说火枪吗
I like your spirit.
我喜欢你的精神
You'll be great on the front lines.
你在前线会表现很棒的
Plus, we'll give you new, snazzy fatigues.
而且我们会向你们提供崭新时髦的工作服
Hey, let's do it. No, no, no, no, no.
我们去吧 别 别 别
Hold a second. This is a death wish.
等下 那简直是去送死
You don't have to go to war. I mean, you could model.
你们不用去参加战争 你可以去当模特
We ain't got no money!
我们身无分文
Now this is a job.
这是一份工作
You wanted us to be free?
你想我们自♥由♥吗
Well, we is gonna be free in...
我们会获得自♥由♥
Vietnam.
在越南
We is gonna be free in Vietnam.
我们会在越南获得自♥由♥
And I'm gonna greet every day
我要每天向路人
with a hearty, "Good morning, Vietnam!"
诚恳问候 "早安 越南"[一档节目]
Vietnam!
越南
Vietnam!
越南
That's really bad.
真是悲剧
But we win Vietnam, right?
不过我们打赢了越南战争 对吧
I don't think we do. I mean, it...
没有吧 我觉得...
Oh, of course, no service.
当然没有信♥号♥♥
This is getting really annoying.
越来越烦人了
Oh, God.
天啊
Stop it, stop it, stop it!
停下 停下
What the hell are you doing?
你在干什么
You and your big nose missed your step-ball-change.
你个大鼻子忘记了脚掌换步
Dance like a man!
跳得有个男人样
All right, kids, back in the car.
好了 孩子们 回到车上去
Michael done fucked it up for everybody.
迈克尔连累了大家
Sorry about that. Let's go!
不好意思 走吧
Thanks a lot, Michael. Come on!
多谢了 迈克尔 快
Move your fat asses, Jackie and Rebbie!
动作快点 杰克和瑞比
Let's go, Tito! Hustle, Jermaine.
快走 蒂托 快 杰姆恩
Come on, La Toya, with your little fat head.
快点 拉托娅 小胖头
Get up... move it, Michael, Marlon, and Randy!
快 动起来 迈克尔 马龙和兰迪
Let's go! Pick up the pace!
快走 速度点
Let's go, Jacksons! Let's go!
走吧 杰克逊家的孩子们 快走
You missed your step-ball-change with your big nose.
你个大鼻子忘记了脚掌换步
That was...
那是
Oh, my God, that...
天啊 那...
That was The Jackson 5.
那是杰克逊五人组
Michael Jackson.
迈克尔·杰克逊
Wow, La Toya, Jackie, Marlon.
拉托娅 杰克 马龙
Singing to me.
给我唱歌♥
Michael, shining out his beautiful eyes.
迈克尔 他的双眼明亮夺目
How did I not take a picture? My phone works.
我怎么之前没有拍照 我的手♥机♥能用
At least the camera works. Joe. God, Joe.
至少相机功能还能用 乔 天啊 乔
Ooh, he was scary, man. Yikes!
他好可怕 可怕
Really living up to the stereotype.
真的跟那种典型形象一模一样
Just like the movie.
和电影里一样
Ooh, God! Wait.
天 等等
Maybe that's the reason
或许那就是我们
we were sent time traveling in the first place.
被传送来这里的原因
To write The Jackson 5's music and get super rich, yes!
为了给杰克逊五人组写歌♥ 赚超多的钱 是的
That is really hard not to do now that you said it.
你都这么说了 不去做就太不对不起自己
But what I meant was to save Michael's childhood
可我想说的是去拯救迈克尔的童年
because he was robbed of his, yeah.
因为他的童年被剥夺了 没错
Which is why he robbed so many children of theirs.
所以他才剥夺了好多小孩的童年
We'd be saving Michael and all of his victims.
我们将会是在拯救迈克尔和他所有的受害者
Maybe we're supposed to be changing history for the better.
也许我们的使命就是改善历史
We're not doing great so far.
目前为止我们做得不太好
We just sent those slaves to Vietnam.
我们刚把那群奴隶送到了越南
Ugh, that was so bad. That was more you than me.
真糟 那事你的责任比我大