蠢特夫妇（2025）

倒立太久就会如此
That's what happens if you stand on your head long enough.
首先 他们的头会缩进他们的脖子
First, their heads will shrink into their necks.
我在萎缩！
I'm shrinking!
来人救救我！我要得萎缩症了！
Somebody save me! I'm getting the Dreaded Shrinks!
然后他们的脖子会缩进他们的身体里
Then their necks will shrink into their bodies.
然后他们的身体会缩进他们的腿里
Then their bodies will shrink into their legs.
然后他们的腿会缩进他们的脚里
Then their legs will shrink into their feet,
直到世上再无
until there's nothing left in this whole world
蠢特夫妇
of Mr. and Mrs. Twit.
巴布西 你觉得真会这样？
Do you really think that's gonna happen, Bubsy?
但愿如此
I hope it does.
麻太太 你觉得呢？ 你觉得他们会化成一团烂泥吗？
What do you think, Mrs. M? Think they'll melt into a puddle of goo?
抱歉 你说什么？
Sorry, what's that?
Huh?
我听不懂 麻瓜·旺普一家的话了 比莎
I can't understand the Muggle-Wumps, Beesha.
你呢？
Can you?
麻太太？
Um, Mrs. M?
怎么回事？
What's happening?
我为什么听不懂你们的话了？
Why can't I understand you? Why can't I understand you?
拜托 别这样 我需要你
Please, no. No, I need you. I-- I need you!
正如富有同理心的孩子 能听懂动物说话
Just as children with a deep sense of empathy
can understand animals,
缺乏同理心的孩子则不能
children without it can't.
道理就这么简单
It's as simple as that.
你榨干了生活中所有的美好
You take all the good out of life.
你是我见过最恶劣的人
And you're the worst person I've ever met.
憎恨你很简单 因为你恐怖如斯
Hating you is easy 'Cause you're horrible
你们这群恶心的小爬虫来干什么？
What on earth are you gribbly little grubs doing here?
我们不忍♥心看你们得萎缩症
We felt bad about the idea of you getting the Dreaded Shrinks and, you know,
然后惨死
dying a horrible death.
所以我们又回来救你们
So we came back to save you.
是吗？
You did?
当然了
Sure did.
憎恨…
Hate is…
很简单
so easy.
我们彼此憎恨
You hate me, I hate you. Yay!
现在我们就是一辈子的敌人
Now we're enemies for life,
我再也不用去想你们其实也是人类
and I never have to think about the fact that you're both human beings.
也不需要去想你们 曾经经历了多大的痛苦
Never have to wonder how badly you must've suffered
才变成今天这样刻薄的人
to become this mean.
也不用去想 我爸妈当年离开我时的挣扎和痛苦
Or imagine what my parents went through when they left me.
憎恨很简单
Hate's easy.
但它会啃噬你的内心
But it'll eat you up inside
直到把你变成愤怒的小蠢货
until all that's left is an angry little twit.
我不想活在一个仇恨会赢的世界里
I don't wanna live in a world where hate wins.
所以我原谅你们
So yeah, I forgive you.
你们自♥由♥了
You're free.
谢谢
Well, thank you.
对 谢谢
Yeah. Thanks.
现在快过来 我要你们俩做成派
Now get over here so I can cook you both in a pie.
别跑 你们这些可恶的小萝卜头！
Get back here, you terrible little turnips!
我饿了！
I'm hungry!
不好 -我就担心会发生这样的事
Oh no. -I was afraid this might happen.
试试总没坏处！
It was worth a try!
Whoa!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
干得好 家人
Good job, family.
这个故事就这样结束了吗？
Is that how the story ends? -Not quite.
还没
Boing! Boing! Boing!
再见 蠢特夫妇
So long, Mr. and Mrs. Twit.
我们现在要收回我们的孤儿院了
We'll be taking back our orphanage now.
这可真是出人意料 -确实
Well, that was unexpected. -Yes.
在餐巾纸先生把孤儿院 送回了它原本的位置之后
And after Mr. Napkin returned the orphanage to its rightful location,
麻瓜·旺普一家把“眼泪配方”
the Muggle-Wumps sold the formula for their tears
卖♥♥给了一家跨国公♥司♥
to a multinational corporation
这家公♥司♥用它来终结了 世界对化石燃料的依赖
which used the tears to end the world's dependence on fossil fuels.
靠着这笔巨款 麻瓜·旺普一家买♥♥下了孤儿院
With the windfall of cash, the Muggle-Wumps bought the orphanage,
领养了比莎、巴布西和所有的孤儿
adopted Beesha, Bubsy, and all of the other orphans,
还请了餐巾纸先生当兼♥职♥保姆
and hired Mr. Napkin as a part-time au pair.
而比莎本人则被誉为从蠢特夫妇手中 拯救特里佩罗的英雄
For her part, Beesha was credited with saving Triperot from the Twits.
她还提出用“弗洛波” 填满干涸的特里佩湖
And with her idea to refill Tripe Lake with florbnorbles,
让特里佩罗再次成为“世界欢乐之都”
Triperot became the fun capital of the world once more.
他们从此就过上了幸福快乐的生活？
And they all lived happily ever after?
差不多吧
Something like that.
去睡觉吧
Now go to bed.
哎呀 你总得告诉我 蠢特夫妇后来怎么样了吧
Oh, man. You've got to at least tell me what happened to the Twits.
好吧
All right.
你也许会以为经历了这些 蠢特夫妇应该学到教训
You might think that the Twits would've learned a lesson,
但光是学到教训是不够的
but it's not enough to just learn something.
你得愿意改变并付诸行动
You have to want to change, and then make an effort to actually do so.
而蠢特夫妇一点都不愿意
Something the Twits were entirely unwilling to do.
这是治疗萎缩症副作用的
This is the only way to get rid of the side effects
唯一办法 我的天使
of the Dreaded Shrinks, my angel.
你感觉到他们在拉扯你了吗？
Can you feel them stretching you?
感觉到了 我快被拉成面条了
I can. They're stretching me like mad.
很好 说明起效了
Good. That means it's working.
你确定绑紧我的脚了？
Are you sure my feet are tied properly?
要是绳子断了 那我可真就“飞走了”
If them strings around my ankles break, it'll be goodbye for me.
那拉力能直接把我拽上月球
That's enough pull to take me to the moon.
多可怕的念头啊
What a ghastly thought.
我们绝对不想那样的事情发生 天啊
Wouldn't want anything like that to happen, dear me.
不
No.
我不会放过你们的 老秃鹫！
I'll get you for this, you grizzly old grunion!
Oi!
Whoa!
Whoo-hoo!
Whoo-hoo!
妈妈 再也没胡子了！
No more beard, Mum!
我们摆脱胡子了！
We're free! We're free from the beard!
Tears are like magic
And laughing is fun
If you can have both of them
Why just have one?
Everything matters
And all things belong
Fear is the same place
That courage comes from
（特里佩罗第一彩妆品牌）
（主演）
（还没死呢）
（紧抱强力胶 只需300美元）
Family's not only
Who you're related to
It's who you care for
And who cares for you
It's easy to hate
What you don't understand
If we don't agree
Could you still take my hand?
Open the door
Look what we've done
Open your heart
How far we've come
Lessons in life
They are learned in reverse
My wisest friends
Talk completely backwards
Nothing is pointless
And nothing's too much
You may feel small
But you are big enough
Open the door
（欢迎来访威斯康星州尼纳市）
Look what we've done
Open your heart
How far we've come
Open the door
Look what we've done
Open your heart
How far we've come
Open the door
Look what we've done
Open your heart
How far we've come
Open the door
Look what we've done
Open your heart
How far we've come
不！
No!
什么？
What?
Huh?
我们到底在哪里？
Where on earth are we?
看起来是…
It looks like…
隆帕兰
Loompaland.
我一点也不喜欢现在这样
I don't like this. Not one little bit.
我就知道事情会变成这样
Mm. -I knew it would end like this.
都怪你！ -怪你 你个屎壳郎
This is your fault! -It's your fault, you dung beetle.
Every day I fall in love with you
And then you hurt me
Splitting my heart in two
But then I fall once again