冥界警局（2013）

I've sat in that chair.
所以你别心急
So take your time.
慢慢了解
Ease into it.
我要了解什么
Ease into what?
来吧 天才 我知道你能行
Come on, genius. I know you can get there.
这是一个笑话吗
This is a joke.
真搞笑 哈 哈 哈
Hilarious. Hahaha.
我死了吗
I'm dead?
说实话 警♥察♥贪污 黑警♥察♥
Let's be honest, being a dirty cop
会因工而死的比例向来高
is one of the higher shotinthefacepercentage jobs.
但我可不是黑警♥察♥
That's not who I am.
真的吗 帅哥
Really, pretty boy?
当你在上来的路上时 你感觉如何
How did it feel as you were headed towards Judgment?
舒服吗
Comfortable?
你是感觉自己正在去往天堂
Feel like you were bound for glory?
或者还是有点担心会下去地狱
Or were you a little worried that you were going down?
我是这么认为的
l thought so.
你很幸运 尼克
You're lucky, Nick.
你有我们想要的技能 所以我们让你选择
You have skills that we want. So we're giving you a choice.
你可以选择审判
You can take your chances with Judgment,
或者
or,
加入冥界警局
you can join the R.l.P.D.
什么是R.I.P.D
The R.I.P.D?
冥界警♥察♥局
Rest In Peace Department.
懂了 好名字
I get it. It's cute.
简单的说
Simply put
我们专捉死去的那些设法逃脱审判局的人
we find dead people that have managed to escape Judgment.
送他们回到他们该去的地方
We ship them off back down to where they belong.
这合约是100年期限
The tour is 100 years.
如果你答应了 我们可以把你送回波士顿 你家的草地
If you say yes, we'll send you back down to Boston, your home turf.
我做
I'll do it.
这行不通的
That's not gonna work.
什么行不通的 我说了我加入
What's not gonna work? I said I'm in.
我知道你在想什么 你被欺骗了 你想要回以前的生活
I know what you're thinking. You got rooked, you want your old life back.
你想要朱丽亚
You want Julia.
不是 你问我会不会帮你 我愿意
No. You asked me to help you, and I'm here to help.
你以为我看不♥穿♥你吗
You really don't think I can read you?
这里有所有我需要了解你的一切的东西
I know everything there is to know about you.
千万不要浪费这个机会 尼克
Don't squander this opportunity, Nick.
而且我知道 你可以在审判日的那一天
I know for a fact you can use a good
用到一封好的推荐信 对吧
recommendation on Judgment Day, okay?
我觉得我提起了你的兴趣了
I think you're smelling what I'm selling.
你还有其他问题吗
Any more questions?
这是斯蒂利·丹的什么歌♥
What's with the Steely Dan?
我不知道 总是在播放
Noidea. It's always playing.
看起来可以让人放松
It seems to relax people.
开始吧 很好
Let's do this. Yes, let's.
可能会有点痒
This will tickle a bit.
他妈的
What the...
拿上东西 过来这里
Clench 'em and get over here.
嘿 你是我的律师
Hey, are you my lawyer?
给老娘闭嘴
Settle down!
这儿是扣押室 我们称他们为"死鬼"
This is holding. We call them "Deados."
在他们显形之前 他们看起来都像普通人
Until they pop, they look like regular people,
所以除了我们 没人知道 他们其实是怪物
so no one except us knows they're monsters inside.
你知道的 如果你成为漏网之鱼
You see, if you slip through the cracks
死后还留在人间
and stay on Earth after you die,
你灵魂会腐烂
your soul rots.
如果他们腐烂 就会影响全世界
If they rot, the world rots.
地球暖化 黑死病 坏死的细胞 明白了吗
Global warming, black plague, bad cell reception, get it?
如果没有冥界警局
Without the R.I.P.D.,
世界可能已经在1954年
the world would have been overrun
就被死人占领
by these dead people some time in 1954.
怎么现在让留下来了
How is staying an option?
每一天有15万人死亡
A hundredandfiftythousand people die every day.
这个系统在设计之初 没想到会是这么大的数量
This system wasn't designed to handle that kind of volume.
欢迎加入大家庭
Welcome to the big league.
波士顿冥界警局
R.I.P.D. Boston.
在你生前成为警务人员之前
Before you are the greatest law officers who ever lived and died.
我们已是第三大警局
We're the third biggest precinct in the force.
第一是什么
What's the first?
博卡
Boca.
斯科茨代尔冥界警局也非常大
R.I.P.D. Scottsdale does a lot of volume, too.
相信我 最时尚的是胸毛
Trust me, chest hair is making a big comeback.
我告诉你 女孩喜欢这样
I'm telling you, chicks dig it.
在你死后的第一天 你还有很多需要学的
It's a lot to take in on your first day dead.
不过放心 你的搭档会解释一切
But don't worry, your partner will explain it all to you.
不 放开你的手
No! Get your hands off me!
我告诉你 别用你那脏手
I said, get your hands
碰
off
我
me!
别这样 罗伊
Come on, Roy.
你才别这样
Oh, you come on.
只因为我是唯一敢开枪见血
Just because I'm the only one willing to lethalup.
哎呀 天呀
Oh, Jesus.
天你老母
No, you Jesus!
罗伊 什么
Roy! What?
他都走到门口了
He was going for the door.
如果可以让你感觉更好的话 我会用枪指着他们
I'll plant a gun on him if it makes you feel any better.
你想把问题闹大 闹上"永恒部门"
Would you like to take this up with Eternal Affairs?
我们都知道事实并非如此 亲爱的
We both know what this is about, don't we, honey pot?
不是现在 罗伊
Not the time, Roy.
为什么不是现在 我很冷静
Why not have it out now? I'm comfortable.
罗伊这是你的新搭档 尼克·沃克
Roy, meet your new partner, Nick Walker.
我们之前已经讨论过这个问题 我是独行侠
We've been over this before. I'm a oneman operation.
你别无选择 罗伊
Not a choice, Roy.
不 跟我握手需要真本事的
No. You gotta earn that.
来吧 菜鸟
Come on, rookie.
带上你的小♥弟♥弟♥
Grab your huevos.
请遵循所有的规则
Please follow all posted regulations.
部门的卫生规则是为大家利益着想
Department hygiene regulations are for your benefit.
来吧 别害羞
Tuck on in. Don't be shy.
冥界警局警员 返回工作岗位前应洗手
享受这次旅行吧
Goin' for a ride.
你们想过要更好地隐藏这个地方吗
You ever think about hiding this place a little better?
你最后一次送修录像机是何时
When was the last time you got a VCR repaired?
明白了
Point taken.
别惊讶了 你回来了
That's right, you're back.
不要弄湿裤子 来吧
Don't wet your pants over it. Come on.
我们要迟到了 女督查希望
Don't wanna be late. Proctor likes to
你先来个了结
start you off with some closure.
上车
Get in!
这令人失望 是吧
Disappointing turnout, huh?
应该更隆重点
Expected more.
我们有很多话要谈
We got a lot to talk about,
但现在我先停一会儿
but for now, I'm just gonna step back,
你就沉思一分钟吧
let you soak it in for a minute.
此刻不是关于我的
This moment is not about me.
是关于你的
This is about you
放开过去
letting go.
感谢你让我沉沉思
Thank you for letting me soak it in.
我在那里等着 好吧
I'll wait for you. All right.
你知道我的葬礼是怎么样
Do you know what my funeral was?
我的尸体被一群土狼啃光
Watching a bunch of coyotes pick my carcass clean
之后它们拖着我的骨头放在一个山洞里
and drag my bones off into a cave.
一个该死的洞穴
A freaking cave, hoss.
噢 又来了
Here it comes.
要小心啊
Be careful, now!
朱丽亚 朱丽亚
Julia? Julia!
我在这里 我不知道怎么一回事 但我在这里
I'm here. I don't know how, but I'm here.
对不起 我不认识你
I'm sorry, I don't know you.