Not just one, either, a whole damn pitcher.
-你要做一个地痞吗 -是的
-So you're going full gangsta. -Yeah.
你知道我真正想做的是什么吗
But you know what I'd really like to do?
办一个"第一个夏夜"派对
Throw a "first night of summer" party.
-你知道的 -有点小疯狂
-Yeah. -You know, something a little crazy.
我们有很多很多年 没有疯狂过了
Well, it's been many, many years since we've done something crazy.
然而只有一个问题
Just one problem, though.
我的房♥子不够大
My house isn't big enough.
但你的够大
But yours is.
我最近参加的一个派对都要追溯到高中了
Last party I had was senior year in high school.
那晚是我经历过最美丽的夜晚
Yeah, that was, like, the best night of my life.
我们全都与妓♥女♥们搅在一起
We all hooked up with chicks.
为什么不再来一次呢
Come on, why not do that again?
因为我们已经有女人和小孩了
Because we already have chicks and kids
还有很高的胆固醇 所以
...and high cholesterol now, so just...
是时候向前看了 今晚你要和迪一起来
It's time to move on. You want to come over tonight with Dee,
好吧
that's fine... I think.
我要问下我老婆
I got to ask my wife first.
好吧 小痞子
Okay, gangsta.
你从哪里买♥♥到这些鞋子的
Hey, hey, where'd you get those shoes,
网店
...Losers "R" Us?
我做的
I made them.
你做的
You made them?
在厕所里
In a toilet?
那孩子喜欢白色的东西
That kid's like White Precious.
走开 达菲
Get lost, Duffy.
别管她
Yeah, leave her alone.
你说了什么 小矮子
Hey, what'd you say, Hollywood?
-你有什么想对我说的 -没啊
-You got something to say to me? -Nothing, nothing, nothing.
注意了 卡马特的购物者们
Attention, Kmart shoppers,
让我们找个位置坐下
...let's find a seat, please.
是的 你的迷彩军装
Yes, you in the camouflage jacket
美国著名女歌♥手 音乐界的"美丽花蝴蝶"
和玛丽亚·凯里的发型
and Mariah Carey hairdo.
是的 让个位置出来 谢谢
Yeah, just pop a squat, thank you.
你♥爸♥不会再这一整天的
You're lucky your dad's here, but he won't be here all day.
别管我
Leave me alone.
有手有脚的沙包
Beanbag with arms and legs,
在有人受伤之前
seriously, take a seat,
坐下吧
or seats, before someone gets hurt.
你死定了
You're dead, man.
我有一些事情要做
I'm gonna go get some things done,
然后去参加我女儿的芭蕾独演会
and then I'm gonna go to my daughter's ballet recital,
所以直到午饭前你是一个人
so you're on your own until lunchtime.
别担心 没人会来的
No worries. No one will come in anyway.
是的
Right.
伦纳德有说起过我吗
Does Leonard ever talk about me?
哪个伦纳德
Leonard?
你老公
Your husband.
伦尼
Lenny.
在这里工作之前我大概就跟你说过
I probably should have told you this before I started working here,
他曾经是我的男朋友
but he used to be my boyfriend.
你们什么时候在一起的
When did you guys go out?
六年级时
Sixth grade.
曾有一次
This one time,
课间的时候 我们分了一块泡泡糖
we split a piece of bubble gum at recess.
我带了一张他写给我的纸条
I brought in a note
我觉得你应该看看
that he sent me, and I thought you should see it.
对你保密让我觉得很奇怪
I just felt weird having a secret with you.
你觉得我带发夹还是发带好看
"Do you like my hair better in a barrette or a headband?"
这是我写的
That's what I wrote.
发夹
"Barrette."
这是他回我的
And that was his response.
我一直带着会困扰你们吗
Does it bother you that I still wear it?
不 我很喜欢
No, no, no, I think it's sweet.
我觉得他还对我有感觉
I think he still has feelings for me.
我要去上班了
I'm gonna go work out now.
你真的认为一个苗条 健美的体型
Do you really think that a tight, toned body
会让他远离他曾经的女人吗
will keep him away from his Hubba Bubba baby?
希望吧 再见
I hope so. Bye.
你惹了不该惹的人 姑娘
You just messed with the wrong girl, chica!
他们在我的宝贝身上喷漆
They spray-painted my baby.
啧啧 他们都拼对了
Gee, and everything's spelled right.
这不可能是我的学生
These can't be my students.
祝你开心 长发公主
Have a nice day, Rapunzel.
你相信这个吗
Hey, guys, can you believe this?
六月了 六月了 六月了
Calendar turns to June,
我可爱的学生们成了野兽
my wonderful students, they become animals.
俏皮粉红豹
可能是因为你一直在babyGap
Maybe they're just mad that you keep going
买♥♥衣服逼疯了他们
to the babyGap to buy your clothes.
早上好 塔尔迪奥校长
Hey, Principal Tardio, good morning.
快去上课
Right to class, right to class.
你暑假的最后一骑如何 尼克
How was your last ride in before the summer, Nick?
记住 今天只有半天的工作时间
Remember, today is only a half a day.
-也只有半件衣服 是吗 -什么
-And a half a shirt, right? -What?
-我说他想向你招手
-I said he wants to wave good-bye to you. -Okay.
-他来了 -我也对暑假充满期望
-Here he goes. -I'm excited about the summer, too.
那是我的笔记本 不防水的
Hey, that's my laptop! That's not waterproof!
-小猴子 -夏天
-Monkey boy, monkey boy. -Summer!
-小猴子 -夏天
-Monkey boy. -Summer!
夏天 夏天
Summer! Summer!
你觉得怎样
So, what do you think?
我直接带你去上班吗
Do I take you straight to work?
我有个预约必须要去
I got one appointment
在早上八点到下午四点之间
...I got to get to sometime between 8:00 a.m. and 4:00 p.m.
-好吧 -但她可以等
-Okay. -But she can wait.
看看这个
Good. And look at this.
他又回来了
He's back at it again.
他再没去工作
Why isn't he at work?
因为 他被这个女人玩弄着
He's just... This woman has a grip on him.
这太荒谬了 这会毁了他的婚姻
It's ridiculous. It's gonna ruin his marriage.
谢谢你的早餐 妈
Thank you for breakfast, Mommy.
你会来看我们的演出吗
Will you be coming by to watch Days of Our Lives later?
我要去查到哪个双胞胎杀了雷纳尔多 记得吗
Well, we got to find out which twin murdered Renaldo, right?
应该的
We sure do.
-好的 -罗蒙诺索夫先生
-Okay. -Hey, Mrs. Lamonsoff,
你好
good to see you.
不错的校车 伦尼
Nice school bus, Lenny.
谢谢 祝你好运
Thank you. Have a great day.
妈妈没犯错了吗
Did Mommy make the boo-boo go away?
别告诉我老婆
Don't tell the wife.
你们在做什么
What are you guys doing?
进来 进来
Get in.
尼克
Oh, hey, Nick.
好的
Nice. Nice.
我们来做这个
Let's hit it.
看好了
Watch this.
你要尊重他
You got to respect that.
太棒了
That was awesome.
伦尼怎么了 他们小时候是多么可爱
What's Lenny's problem? They're so cute when they're little.
我知道 我也想念那时候
I know. I miss it.
罗尼啊
Ronnie, Ronnie, Ronnie.
你真的想念那时候吗
You miss that? Really?
别动
Stay. Stay.
别对着我低吼
Don't you growl at me.
别动 宝贝
Stay, baby, Stay.
不好意思
Excuse me.
当老师进来的时候你的孩子会在这里吗
Is your kid gonna be in here when the instructor comes in?
这不是我的孩子
That's not my kid.
他是我的爱人 而且非常绅士
That's my lover, and he's very gentle.
小孩不属于这里
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