狱前教育

But you learned some of that shit from me too. Right, James?
这里发生什么事了 你对我的船到底做了什么
James. What's going on here? What the hell did you do to my boat?
去他的这条船
Man, fuck this boat!
我们拿着你陷害你女婿的证据
We taking the evidence that you framed your son-in-law with,
你这个狗♥娘♥养♥的
sick son of a bitch.
马丁 你怎么能这样对我 十年牢狱
How could you do this to me, Martin? Ten years in prison?
詹姆斯 你知道我不是有意害你
James, you realize that I didn't mean to hurt you.
我很喜欢你 但喜马拉雅老虎输了
I'm very fond of you, but Himalayan Tiger tanked...
我得从其他地方弄钱 我没有选择 不是你就是我
and I had to get the money from somewhere. I had no choice. It was you or me.
这听起来像是个选择
That sounds like a choice!
詹姆斯 去他的 我们走
James, fuck him. We're leaving.
下次你想要存储什么假账 记得找一台iPad
And next time you wanna store some fraud shit, get an iPad.
快点 詹姆斯
Come on, James.
-哦 见鬼 -艾丽莎
-Oh, my damn. -Alissa.
詹姆斯 爸爸 他在这里干嘛呢
James. Daddy, what's he doing here?
没事的 亲爱的
It's fine, honey.
詹姆斯
Uh, James.
我有个很棒的想法 你为什么不跟我们来呢
I have a wonderful idea. Why don't you come with us?
我们在佛得角开始了全新的生活 没人要进监狱
We'll start a whole new life in Cape Verde and nobody has to go to prison.
难道你不想要...
Don't you want...
一座大大的岛
a big, big island?
-你参与这事了 -没有 最初没有
-Were you in on this? -No, not at first.
而当他告诉我这事时 我真的很生他的气
And when he told me about it, I was really mad at him.
但后来他解释 他如何能够隐藏大部分钱...
But then he explained how he was able to hide most of the money...
所以真的无害
so, really, there's no harm done.
詹姆斯 现在还有时间 获得你想要的一切
James, now there's still time to get everything you want.
一切
Everything.
不 我什么都不想要
No! I don't want any of it.
你是个白妞儿
-And you got a white girl's ass. -Ah!
干得好 嘿 詹姆斯 你想要关掉吗
Thattaboy. Hey, James, do you wanna switch off, man?
我上面什么都没留下
I got nothing left up top.
快 把它扔进救生艇
Quick, throw it in the Zodiac.
没错 然后我们可以离开这里
Right. Then we can get the fuck out of here.
可恶 该死
-Shit! Goddamn it! -Aah!
我真诚地抱歉 事情必须这样了结
I am genuinely sorry it had to end this way.
在我们出了防波堤后 就杀了他们
When we clear the breakwater, shoot them.
你不必这样做
You ain't got to do this, man.
你不必这样做
You ain't got to do this.
爸爸 似乎你想到了一切 不是吗
Well, Dad, looks like you thought of everything, didn't you?
你总是先我一步
You were always one step ahead of me.
除了你忘了一个小细节
Except you forgot one little detail.
哪来的
Where'd that come from?
监狱搜身第一规则
First rule in prison pat-downs:
永远都要检查肛♥门♥
Always check the anus.
有人学会了怎么把东西♥藏♥到屁♥股♥里
Someone learned how to keister.
没错 笨蛋们
-Ew. -That's right. Nuts and butts.
你指我 好的 你要这样做吗
You point? Okay. That's how you wanna do it?
你指他 我指马丁
You point at him. I'll point at Martin.
不管怎样 如果我死了 马丁会死
Either way. So if I die, Martin's going.
所以你搞定 杀我 马丁会中枪
So you figure it out. Shoot me, Martin gets shot.
盖尔 现在该你采取行动了
Ball's in your court, Gayle.
-艾丽莎 -杀了她
-Alissa? -Shoot her.
杀了她 总之你要杀了那个贱♥人♥
Shoot her. You need to shoot that bitch anyway.
你不会杀我的
You're not gonna shoot me.
你在浪费时间 警♥察♥会随时赶到
You're wasting time. Police'll be here any second.
没错 我们说的是真警♥察♥
That's right. We're talking the real police.
警♥察♥会开着装有警报器的船到这儿...
The ones that's gonna come here on boats with sirens on them...
会带着会水的警犬 让我跟你说说会水的警犬
that's got dogs that can swim. Let me tell you something about swimming dogs.
我来告诉你吧 你会满嘴跑火车
Now, let me tell you, you're gonna bullshit a bullshitter...
把谎话吹得似是而非
just make the bullshit plausible.
这是美国联邦法♥院♥执行官 准备登船
This is the U. S. Marshall Service. Prepare to be boarded.
你要载着逃犯
You are carrying a fugitive.
太棒了
Yes!
没错
Heh. Hell yeah.
哦 可恶
Oh, shit.
怎么会
How?
记得你那个蹩脚律师 给我的这个脚镣吗
Remember this bracelet that crooked lawyer of yours gave me?
根据我的计算 我们应该正在郡界之外
By my calculation we should be well outside the county line.
监狱学校开学了
Prison school's in session, bitch.
而有人刚刚毕业了
And somebody just graduated.
太好了 太好了
That's perfect. That's perfect.
很棒 是吗
That's great, right?
注意 海上通知 我们是美国联邦法♥院♥执行官
Attention Sea Note. This is the U.S. Marshal Service.
-马丁 你要去哪儿 -是啊 你要去哪儿
-Where you going? Huh, Martin? -Where you going?
什么
What?!
-看看你 -我知道
-Look at you, man! -I know.
天哪 看看你
God, look at you!
你把它放到...在你的屁♥股♥里 放在你屁♥股♥里
Where did you put...? That was in your ass. That was in your ass.
电脑证明我无罪
The computer proved I was innocent.
马丁因诈骗被捕
Martin was arrested for fraud,
篡改证据和妨碍司法公正
tampering with evidence and obstruction of justice.
我会联♥系♥我的律师 爸爸
And I will be contacting my attorney. Daddy?
至于我 我洗脱了所有与挪用公♥款♥有关的指控
As for me, I was cleared of all charges related to the embezzlement.
看来我们搞定了
So I guess we did it.
蛋黄酱和巧克力
Mayo and Chocolate.
感谢上帝 我们不会再需要这个了
-Heh. -Thank God we won't be needing this anymore.
这把非法的未经许可的枪
This illegal, unlicensed gun.
-詹姆斯 你应该把这东西丢掉 -枪
-Okay, you should really get rid of that thing. -Gun!
-丢了它 -哦 该死
-Drop it! -Oh, shit.
我最后因持有未经许可的武器 被拘留六个月
I did end up getting six months for carrying an unlicensed weapon.
但多谢达内尔 我准备好了
But, thanks to Darnell, I was ready.
监狱就像最纯粹的生活
Prison is like life distilled to its purest form.
你尊重别人 别人就尊重你
Give respect to get respect.
但是 如果你让别人乱吃你的食物
But most of all, if you let someone fuck with your food,
那你就是娘炮
you're a punk fuck bitch.
有人应该告诉你 这个蛋黄酱过期了
Someone should have told you this Mayo went bad.
老子揍死你
I'm gonna punch you in the fuck!
老子弄死你
I'm gonna shit you!
圣操蛋快乐 混♥蛋♥
Merry Dickmas, Santa Cock!
马丁准备得就不怎么样了 但他也汲取了宝贵的教训
Martin didn't do as well. But he learned a valuable lesson too.
他们在圣昆丁廷被搞干翻了
They be fucking in San Quentin.
-你好吗 -搞干得天翻地覆
-How ya doing? -A whole lot of fucking.
嘿 打开 打开
Hey! Open up. Open up.
珊达每天来看我
Shonda visited me every day.
我从未认为监狱会是 我学着再次爱别人的地方
I never thought prison would be the place I learned to love again...
但这就是所发生的事
but that's what happened.
不 不 不 她还没完成 她还没完成呢
No, no, no! She's not done. She hasn't finished yet.
不 这不是你想的那样 我们恋爱了
No, it's not what you think. We're in love.
我帮助联邦调查局找到 并归还马丁偷走的所有资产
I helped the FBI find and return all the assets Martin stole.
作为回报 他们解冻了我的银行账户
In return, they unfroze my bank accounts,
我知道把我的钱投到哪里
and I knew just where to invest my money.
盛大开业
不错吧
It's good?
很棒 是吧
It's good, right?
玛凯拉 你为爸爸感到骄傲吗
Makayla, you proud of Daddy?
爸爸做得很棒吧 抱我一下
Daddy did good? Give me a hug.
爸爸 我喜欢你的洗车中心
Daddy, I like your car wash.
宝贝 你喜欢我很高兴
I'm glad you like it, sweetie.
看来你幸存下来了
I see you survived.
蛋黄酱 我猜你变坚强了
I guess you got hard, Mayo.
不 是你让我坚强的
No. You made me hard.
过来
Come here, man. Heh.
你让我坚挺了
You made me hard.
那么坚挺
So hard.
你使我如此坚挺
You got me so hard.
兄弟 我也很高兴见到你 我很高兴见到你
I'm happy to see you too, big fella. I'm happy to see you.
有段时间我不能坚挺...
There was a moment where I stopped being hard...
但我想到了你 这使我再次坚挺
but I thought of you, and it got me hard again.
我太感谢你了
And I can't ever thank you.
好了
All right.
欢迎回家 快 我们上车
Welcome home, man. Come on, let's get in the car.